metta-noia

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I hope the first alien race we run into got that loud

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I recently found my “gold” hammer after misplacing it. It’s my favorite tool ever because it looks like a regular hammer trying to be fancy,

but then you twist both halves and unscrew it to find a flat-head screwdriver in the middle.

BUT, if you twist the very end and unscrew that

you find a phillips screwdriver.

BUT DON’T THINK THAT’S ALL THERE IS! THERE’S MORE!! unscrew the very end again to find a smaller flat-head screwdriver!

BUT THAT’S STILL NOT THE END!!

unscrew the end of this screwdriver to find a final, teeny tiny, flat-head screwdriver

look at how cute it is!

it’s like a matryoshka doll of tools.

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Depression: No do thing. Tired.

Me: Okay well. Maybe if I go to sleep super duper early, I’ll get a decent amount of sleep.

Insomnia: You Fool. You absolute goddamn idiot

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someone: you cant be an aesthetic blog and still shitpost me: 

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Researchers have discovered a new species of frog in Borneo which only grows to the size of a pea.

Finding the mini frogs, named Microhyla nepenthicola, proved to be a challenge due to their size. Adult males range in length from 10.6 to 12.8 millimeters.

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Everyone’s like “those Germans have a word for everything” but English has a word for tricking someone into watching the music video for Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up.

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this subway crowded as fuck, thanos was right

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how the human brain works:

electricity tickles the meat so that different slimes come out. sometimes the slime feels good sometimes bad. some people make more bad slime than good slime. that’s called clinical depression.

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Sweet cinnamon roll

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Just wanna share some old ass slurpee pins

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