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האזעקה הראשונה מאיראן

אז יש לי את האוסי הזה (קוראים לו עומר) שהוא טרנס ויום אחד הוא פוגש אקס שלו ברחוב והוא אומר לו שלום כי הוא נחמד

אבל האקס שלו לא מזהה אותו כי הוא יצא איתו כשעומר עוד היה בארון (presenting as a girl כאילו)

אז הוא כאילו מי זה הבנאדם הזה ולמה הוא קצת מוכר לי

קיצר כל הבלאגן עם האיראנים התחיל וזה מה שיצא

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as a child being told "the moon controls the tides" with no additional explanation was like. oh okay. you want me to believe in magic? you're talking about magic right now? okay. fine

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the walking dead, game of thrones, and breaking bad were just superwholock for men

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Faces carved into the walls of the Paris Catacombs

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You are not inherently an antisemite for criticizing Netanyahu or actions of the Israeli government.

You ARE inherently an antisemite if you excuse/justify/celebrate when random Israeli civilians are murdered.

Israel contains half the world’s Jews- you can’t celebrate half the world’s Jewish population dying without being an antisemite.

Watch how some so-called “activists” react to the antisemitic DC murders. If you don’t hear Jews crying out about what happened, you either follow no Jews or only tokens.

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I’m ngl most of you are really antisemitic and you don’t realize it because you don’t know anything about Jews and the history of antisemitism. It’s so easy to say ha, that’s not me, when shit is so incredibly ingrained that you wouldn’t even notice if anything less than a sieg heiling-nazi hit you over the head.

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How it feels to be Jewish online

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you cannot claim to support jews and think that every israeli should die btw

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I know we talk about the oxen a lot, but there's some wild fun stuff in the Talmud too. An incomplete list:

rabbi dick measuring contest

a king's 1am influencer bro routine

"King David had 400 sons and they were all hot"

an argument about the legality of literally fucking yourself

HOA rules for where windows on your house can go

"as we all know, werewolves have tails in human form"

two guys who got off on charges for homosexuality by telling the witness that it was two witnesses against one

judge using fruit to prove eye witness testimony is unreliable

"quarrels are like peeing"

a bunch of rabbis defining different types of bed and one of the definitions they use is a bed specifically for throwing your clothes on

someone insisting that the law saying "you need a jury of x amount of people" means that x should be half the jury + 1 resulting in the suggestion that you need a jury of 45 people for a murder trial

your mom jokes

"why does it say Solomon had 4000 horses AND that he had 40,000 horses?" "he had 160 million horses"

science more questionable than Pliny

the demand that a captive bear who killed someone be present at the trial

diagram of punishments for illegal haircuts

"in order for a town to be big enough to have a court it needs to have 10 idlers of the synagogue"

a rabbi claiming that you can only be a judge on the national court if you're a hot wizard

In conclusion: the Sages would do numbers on tumblr.

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fuck marry kill טילים מעזה איראן ותימן

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ציוצי מלחמה עם איראן ששמרתי בטלפון כדי לרומם את רוחכם

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בינתיים, ביקום מקביל (טוויטר ישראל):

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חודש גאווה שמח

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diagnoses character with whatever the fuck it is that i got

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in times like these at least i have the character