migraine-marathon - Tumblr blog

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YOU MUST BREAK THE PATTERN TODAY OR THE LOOP WILL REPEAT TOMORROW

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Please I need my grades to look like this so bad what’s your secret

I know this is just some sort of glitch or error but I can’t stop staring at it. 150%. What letter is that even

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Taking my son out for enrichment

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wish i could call in bitchy to work

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You wouldn’t think that flamingoes are extremophiles just from looking at them. It’s like somebody tried to build the vertebrate equivalent of that fungus that lives inside nuclear reactors, and ended up with a gangly pink dinosaur with a spoon for a face.

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There are freshly independent possums scattered around my yard like fat little Easter eggs trotting through the grass and bricks at dusk.

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don't destroy his self-esteem 🐦😆

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What if Damian and Tim love each other and even like? It's just more of a situation "Manipulating others is easier ". Maybe an example will help;

Damian: Father, May I go to Zoo today?

Bruce:No Damian, you're grounded.

Tim:Oh, that's bad. I could go with you to take photos of otter, but if you are not going I think I will stay too. What's a zoo without company. Maybe I will go with Kon next week.

Bruce *Super happy in a moment of thinking his youngest kids getting along*: If you two agree not to kill each other, Damian can go

Tim and Damian:*Knowing looks*

Or situation like;

Tim who has abandoned issues and is having fear of people leaving him: Dick is mad at me. Can you stab me so he will be in his mother hen mode Instead?

Damian who would like to have 5 minutes of peace from Grayson: Say no more

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my favorite thing in Justice League fics is when a character fucks up so badly that their only option is to go talk to Batman. And they still — still — take a moment to figure out how desperate they are before going.

Bruce has such “don’t bother me, I’m working, also why the hell would you do that” disapproving dad energy. It’s stunning.

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His only weakness…

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This is what it’s like asking my oldest younger brother to hang. Never works.

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Making plans with your very much younger sibling

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Alfred taught Bruce how to drive and it was the worst experience of his life. He had less of a heart attack when Bruce decided to fight crime dressed like a furry.

Bruce tried to teach Dick but backed out after the car ended up wrapped around a tree. Dick was only fourteen but come on Bruce, you let me fight crime on a school night but you won’t teach me how to drive.

Alfred picked up the slack and within a couple weeks, Dick was a better driver than half of Gotham. There are no traffic laws in Gotham, so it’s not hard, per se.

Jason had the best understanding of how a car worked. He could barely reach the brake, but he could Hotwire a car in ten seconds flat and Alfred didn’t ask questions. Still, he needed hours to get his license, and Bruce wouldn’t just sign the form. (No Jason, driving the Batmobile doesn’t count.) He didn’t really need any guidance, he never so much as blew a stop light, and it was really just an excuse for them to talk. Jason died before he was old enough to get his license, but he had more than enough hours. Alfred has the log, crumpled and faded, stuffed in a box under his bed, signed, alongside Jason’s forgotten drivers permit. It’s got a little heart on it, he was a donor.

Tim learned to drive from Jack Drake, and Alfred almost regrets not getting to teach him. It was something he wanted to bond with him over. But then Tim goes to Alfred, sheepishly, can you teach me to drive standard? It only takes a couple sessions, and Alfred has a heart attack when they roll backwards, but they get a laugh out of it after. Tim’s not half bad at it, after all.

Steph is no protege. She never has been. Her mom is too shakey to drive, still recovering, and her dad, well it’s hard to teach a kid to drive from blackgate. She won’t ask Tim, he’s only fifteen, and Bruce she despises. But she needs hours and she needs someone to sign her log. Alfred agrees, a little hesitant, but hey, she needs help. It’s the first chance he gets to know her. They make a sudden stop, and her arm curls around her stomach, scared for a child that hasn’t been born. At some point she says, some days I have to stop myself from buying a car seat. I know if I did, I wouldn’t be able to let go.

Cass comes next, and it’s not like she’s never driven before. She’s just never driven with rules before. She blows past stop signs with shakey apologies, but he never yells. It takes her a couple days to get used to not driving like she’s in a high speed chase, and when she does, it’s so relaxing. She drives Alfred around Gotham on errands and they go out to lunch, and even when she has her license they make it a thing. She’s his only granddaughter after all, why shouldn’t they?

Duke isn’t half bad. Alfred shows him the ropes, and he’s a little more nervous than the others. Duke makes less mistakes, and finally, he relaxes. He points out places around Gotham he knows from being a kid living in the city, and Alfred hears how lovingly he speaks about it. They drive a lot at night since Duke patrols during the day, and Gotham at night is a very different story. It’s more alive. And Duke knows the streets like the back of his hand, because it’s his city. He belongs there, just as much as he belongs with the rest of the Waynes.

Damian is a difficult story. He’s known how to drive since he was a literal child, so he’s understandably pissed when Bruce still makes him get practice hours off the vigilante clock. Dick is conveniently stuck in Bludhaven, and Damian simply wants to get it done as soon as possible. Alfred is his second choice, the only person he can think of spending forty unbearable hours driving with. It’s quite pleasant, Alfred lets him pick the music and they bond over a love of classical music. Alfred’s errands take excruciatingly long but after, they grab lunch, and oh why don’t we stop and see the knew exhibit at the Gotham Art Museum. Damian spends hours ranting about his siblings and Bruce, and Alfred tells him stories of how insufferable Bruce was as a child.

(I just think it’d be funny if Bruce was like, I know you could drive at 11 but you should probably get your required hours in out of costume, but I’m busy and you’re grandpa wants to spend time with you)

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boy hostage (spiritual successor to this)

big brother to the rescue:

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An obsidian mirror found at Catalhoyuk, 8,000 years old