mikas-dumb-vents

[mikas-dumb-vents]

Okay I'm just

I'm just gonna be blunt

If any of my friends see this,

Do you hate being my friend? Do you regret it? Is there anything I should change? Anything like that?

[mikas-dumb-vents]

Sorry for the turbulence, everyone, the dumb annoying attention seeker fuckin asshole oversensitive baby brain levels will (hopefully) be turned down to 0 by tomorrow morning

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Uhhhh me being a tragically beautiful death and not being an attention whore by asking for help 24/7 would be pretty POG drop a reblog if you agree like if you disagree/hj

If you like this post I'll fucking get all of you/j

[mikas-dumb-vents]

Akdbjsgdhd hi Mel I see you in my notes lmao/lh

I do not know what the like means but thank you

Ominous as always/j

[mikas-dumb-vents]

So, I "used" to be an attention whore

Really I always was, but I somehow got it into my head that I wasnt anymore??? And just forgot about it??? Anyways, to anyone who's ever convinced me I'm not, you're very sweet, but you're very wrong, and below I've visualized my proof

[mikas-dumb-vents]

I feel alone even though I'm with my best friends

Why

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I feel like I'm just annoying to all my friends and ruin everything for them

I feel like they only hang out with me out of pity, or just anxiety that they'll miss something

[mikas-dumb-vents]

Tbh I have no idea if they are but I'd rather be considerate so I will ✨leave anyways✨

That moment when it feels like your friend might be purposely ignoring/avoiding you OuuuO'

Its uhhhhhh

F u nn n n

I don't think they want me around

I think they want to do their own thing alone and they're just not telling me and they're just

Hoping I take a hint and fuck off

[mikas-dumb-vents]

That moment when it feels like your friend might be purposely ignoring/avoiding you OuuuO'

Its uhhhhhh

F u nn n n

I don't think they want me around

I think they want to do their own thing alone and they're just not telling me and they're just

Hoping I take a hint and fuck off

[mikas-dumb-vents]

I need more

I know you know that I know you're trying and it's mostly my fault for pretending its nothing but i

You needed more so I gave more

I'm giving more even though im out of blood

I dont know how I'm doing it, and it's not like I'm not happy to help you but

When can I have my turn..?

I try and.. it always gets cut short now..

I understand.. not being able to handle things sometimes but..

The last few times its felt..

Well, only half-done most..

I'm probably just being selfish, I'm sorry.

I shouldn't fuss over it.

[mikas-dumb-vents]

🎵My friends are joking about my height while I'm not around!🎵

🎵and I dont have the heart to tell them it hurts🎵

🎵so I play it off with joking anger!🎵

🎵lalalalalala🎵

[mikas-dumb-vents]

Do they care about the prompts we text them?

Dont start this

They hardly reply to anything we text

They're just as stressed as we are, leave it alone

But what if?

What if what???

What if they dont care..?

Then.. theyll tell us, right? I hope they would. But for now let's.. try and avoid that idea. They helped us once already. That's a good sign, right?

[mikas-dumb-vents]

That moment when none of your friends dont seem to care about any of your OCs unless they're not self inserts and/or benefit their own characters storyline So then you delete the chat made specifically for everyone to talk about their OCs because you're the only one using it anymore and they dont seem to care about what you post And you hope just a little that MAYBE they'll notice but even after your friends click on all the chats to look at pinned messages, they don't even say anything about it So now you're not going to talk about your OCs ever again so you dont bore anyone and you're only going to show fanart

And then theres the fact it feels like your boyfriend isnt really trying to actually help you with any feelings you have and you know you shouldn't be upset, because everything you said was all sort of sudden and he's trying his best, but you still cant help but feel like hes not trying very hard and you feel immensely unloved and unwanted

So with the fact that you feel unloved, and you dont think your friends care for your creations no matter how much they insist they do,

You want to be erased from existence.

[mikas-dumb-vents]

From everyone in your mind,

Please kill yourself.

You don't serve a purpose being alive. You do not help your boyfriend's life at all. You make it worse.

There'd be so much weight off of everyone's shoulders if you were gone.

All of this. All of this can stop if you give in.

It's been 8 years since the very first darkened thought.. please give in.

[mikas-dumb-vents]

I think I might throw up from nerves.

My shaking is almost gone, but I'm about to puke.

[mikas-dumb-vents]

Why am I scared???

Why am I scared??

Am I scared of him..?

I shouldnt be...

[mikas-dumb-vents]

It hurts to swallow. I cant breathe evenly.

Each breath makes it worse.