mikkeneko

[mikkeneko]

[Image ID: Screencap of a social media post by chris awesome @(ihavedisease) reading "Birds are just named stuff like Hotbreasted Milf and no one does anything about it"

Followed by: a list of eleven different birds with small photographs of each one, named: Great Tit, Andean Cock-of-the-rock, Dickcissel, Bushtit, Himalayan Snowcock, Common Shag, Horned Screamer, brown booby, Hoary Puffleg, Bananaquit, and Kaka. End ID.]

[mikkeneko]

i got to work on zevran for the ardent blossom zine!

you can get a pdf copy and other things like postcards and stickers here: [link]

[mikkeneko]

YMCA in Akkadian (Ancient Babylonian), as written by Gilgamesh's exasperated tourism minister trying to attract more gay guys to Uruk to keep Gil distracted from politics:

.

Eṭlū!- Young men!

Lā tuštamarraṣā- Do not, do not be troubled!

Aqabbi, eṭlū!- I said, young men!

Lā lā taṣallalā- Do not, do not lie down!

Aqabbi, eṭlū!- I said young men!

Šunu ina ālim- You are in a town,

Bēt bēt šikārim ḫanbā- Where taverns sprout luxuriously,

Eṭlū!- Young men!

Ina ālim alkā- Go to the city,

Aqabbi, eṭlū!- I said young men!

Bēt kaspī ul tīšâ- When you do not have money,

Annikīam tuššabā- Here you can dwell,

Bēt napṭirim nīšu- We have guest-houses,

Itti awīlī umtallâ- They are filled with men….

.

Taḫaddâ ina - You’ll have fun in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA! - U-R-U-K!

Wašābum ṭāb ina - The living is good in,

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA!- U-R-U-K!

Ziquratum elâ! Purattum amrā!- Climb up the ziggurat! See the euphrates!

Šikārum ṭābum šitâ!- Drink fine beer!

Taḫaddâ ina - You’ll have fun in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA! - U-R-U-K!

Wašābum ṭāb ina - The living is good in,

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA!- U-R-U-K!

Amuḫḫūni šaqû! Ziqnūni ītebbū! - Our walls are high! Our beards are shiny!

Nuppušātunu!- You are allowed to breathe [relax]

.

Eṭlū!- Young men!

Eṭlū šimeanni!- Young men listen to me!

Aqabbi, eṭlū! Agana šimeanni!- Young men! Come on, listen!

Aiālam terrišāšu- You desire assistance,

Shū ali īde- This I know for certain!

Šārqum wērum ul ninaddinkunūti- We will not sell you poor copper,

Eṭlū! Ālum ša Uruk bani- Young men! The city of Uruk is beautiful!

Aqabbi eṭlū! Bālātka tezzibši!- I said young man! Leave your pride behind!

Nušallakkunūti- We cause you to go,

Ina Uruk alkā!- Go to Uruk!

Ūmum anniam iseddūkunūti- Today they will help you…

.

Taḫaddâ ina - You’ll have fun in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA! - U-R-U-K!

Wašābum ṭāb ina - The living is good in,

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA!- U-R-U-K!

Šarrum šitpiṣā! Ittmalûšu ṣālā! - Wrestle the king! Fight with him!

Ittīšu mekkê mēlilā!- Play ball with him!

Taḫaddâ ina - You’ll have fun in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA! - U-R-U-K!

Wašābum ṭāb ina - The living is good in,

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA!- U-R-U-K!

Ziquratum elâ! Purattum amrā!- Climb up the ziggurat! See the euphrates!

Šikārum ṭābum šitâ!- Drink fine beer!

.

Eṭlū! Bilītkunu īde! - Young men! I know your burdens

Amtaraṣ! Ina šinigī- I was unwell, in my village,

Ātanaḫ! Erēšum ezzēr- I was tired, I hated plowing,

Awīlum ana yâšim iṭeḫḫe- A man to me approached,

Inūšu! Awātum awânim- Then! Words were said to me,

Šumašu, Sîn-lēqi-unninni- His name was Sîn-lēqi-unninni!

Ina Uruk alkā! Iqabbi ana yâšim- Go to Uruk! He told me,

Ina Uruk awīlī ūterrešū- In Uruk men are needed…

.

Taḫaddâ ina - You’ll have fun in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA! - U-R-U-K!

Wašābum ṭāb ina - The living is good in,

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA!- U-R-U-K!

Ziquratum elâ! Purattum amrā!- Climb up the ziggurat! See the euphrates!

Šikārum ṭābum šitâ!- Drink fine beer!

.

Eṭlū!- Young men!

Addāniqa tallkānim- Please come

Aqabbi, eṭlū!- I said, young men!

Inam anniam ezêršu- I hate this job…

Aqabbi, eṭlū!- I said, young men!

Anāku ānḫāku - I’m so tired….

Bēt bēt šikārim ḫanbā- Where taverns sprout luxuriously,

Taḫaddâ ina - You’ll have fun in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA! - U-R-U-K!

(Šarrum lillam ina - The king is an idiot in

𒌋𒊏𒌋𒅗 U-RA-U-KA!- U-R-U-K…)

Ao3 link

[mikkeneko]

Blueblossoms 💙 + Bee 🐝

Taken by PrueShy

[mikkeneko]

happy hanguang-june <3

[mikkeneko]

Hamster Escapes the Most Dangerous Prison Maze 🐹

[mikkeneko]

Éowyn, disguised as Dernhelm, among the Riders of Rohan ⚔️

Based on Eugéne Grasset’s “Jeanne chevauchant au milieu des hommes d’armes” (1894)

[mikkeneko]

Sometimes I have to remind my dad that he’s a master furniture maker and most people do not possess encyclopedic knowledge of European and American furniture styles and the history of wood glue

[mikkeneko]

In the garden. Värmland, Sweden (June 12, 2021).

[mikkeneko]

prompt for qiu haitang shen yuan:

I want to know more about the bingqiu side of that death and resurrection!! The realization Binghe actually changed for him... without Shen Yuan even intending that?! And after decades of Shen Qingqiu revealing himself to be the same he always was 😮‍💨.

Shen Qingqiu seems very aware of the physical and reputational harm he has done and could do to "Shen-furen" but is missing the context for half the times he's disappointed them. It seems Shen Yuan became aware of what he could be the moment Shen Jiu was set to be peak lord, but was still open to being friends at least? They believed their Shen Jiu could be different. Until he wasn't. At all.

Anyways. That rejection of vengeance has to have done Shen Yuan in romantically (even if they didn't know it). Also Shen Yuan's self-sacrifice dialogue has to have been peak in this au: "I doubted you for 0.05 seconds! Never again! Shizun is sorry you sweet perfect adorable little sheep! Be the bestest demon lord EVer!"

Also: It was always my headcanon that the reason Binghe couldn't bring Shen Yuan back easier was that his soul was already in the mushroom body from the death, so only something that could pull his soul out of it would work. With no mushroom body...

am I just mixing canon and fanfic? Or did something in the au send Luo Binghe in the direction of the Mausoleum first thing? Wait who's the one who ends up resurrecting them? Binghe or Bingdad?

part 1 | part 2

Don't cry, Binghe. Shizun was the one in the wrong.

It's all this teacher's fault. Don't cry.

Luo Binghe stares down at his Shizun's pallid face in a daze. A month has passed since that horrible day in Jinlan—an interminable month filled with nothing with darkness, now that the bright candle of his beloved's life has been extinguished by Binghe's own hands—and in all that time, he did nothing but sit by Shen Yuan's bed and fight Liu Qingge when he broke into Huan Hua to steal her body.

"It wasn't your fault, Shizun," he whispers numbly, reaching out to touch Shen Yuan's cheek. "This Binghe was the one who failed you."

"Palace Master," a low voice says near the door, as Luo Binghe draws Shizun's blanket up over her chest. "Mu-fengzhu is requesting entry to Madam Shen's room, Junshang. And Liu Qingge—"

Luo Binghe blinks.

"Mu-shishu?" he mumbles to himself, running a trembling hand through his hair. "Mu Qingfang said yesterday that there was nothing to be done. What does he want to see me for?"

Gongyi Xiao looks more discomfited than ever. "That—I heard him speaking with the girl Junshang brought back to serve Shen-furen. It must have something to do with her."

Sha Hualing? Luo Binghe rises from Shizun's bed, confused. He brought Sha Hualing back to Huan Hua to bathe and dress Shen Yuan in his absence, since none of the female Huan Hua disciples are trustworthy enough to be left alone with her; and she had been instructed to speak to no one but Gongyi Xiao and Luo Binghe himself while she was at the palace.

What was she doing with Mu Qingfang of all people?

"Send him in," he says tersely. "And send a group of disciples out to the front gate to delay Liu Qingge."

Gongyi Xiao bows and retreats; and a moment later, he returns with Mu Qingfang trailing at his heels.

Mu Qingfang offers no greeting, and Luo Binghe does not expect one. He looks at Shizun's still body for a little while, watching as Luo Binghe's long fingers smooth away the death-bruises on her back, and then:

"There is something I must ask you, Your Excellency."

Luo Binghe's gaze remains fixed on his master's skin. "What is it?"

"Shen-shixiong told me that you were not felled by demons at the Immortal Alliance Conference, as Qiu-shimei told us. He claimed that he threw you into the Endless Abyss; was he speaking the truth?"

"He was," Luo Binghe hears himself say, as if from a great distance. "But Shizun did not lie, either. She was unconscious when I fell—she did not see what happened."

"He also said—" and here Mu Qingfang's voice falters— "that he caught you in the act of forcing yourself upon your Shizun, and that he would not have laid a hand on you otherwise for fear of angering her."

"That is not true," Luo Binghe says quietly. "But I suppose he had every reason to think so. I did not force myself upon her; Shizun was willing. And as for Shen-fengzhu being unwilling to lay a hand on me—well. In that respect, Mu-shishu must know Shen Qingqiu better than I."

Mu Qingfang's eyes narrow. "She was willing?" he asks, taking a step closer. "Then, why—?"

"She was unconscious," Luo Binghe groans, pinching the bridge of her nose. "When Shen-fengzhu found us, he must have thought that I dragged Shizun away from the others and...attacked her when I saw that she was too weary to resist. I tried to explain what happened, but he would not listen; and Shizun couldn't defend me, so he kicked me into the Abyss."

"What did happen, then?"

Sighing, Luo Binghe draws the curtain around Shizun's bed before escorting Mu Qingfang out into the hall and explaining the events of the last shichen before his descent into the Abyss. Mu Qingfang is as pale as a ghost by the end of the tale, looking between Luo Binghe and the shuttered door to Shizun's room with pitying eyes: and at length, he bows deeply and does not rise until Luo Binghe orders him to do so.

"I do not wish to speak on the matter any further," Luo Binghe tells him, afterward. "But there is something I must ask you in turn. Gongyi Xiao told me that he saw you speaking with Sha Hualing earlier; why?"

"I asked her if you had found a way to restore Qiu-shimei to life," Mu Qingfang says somberly. "She told me about the Holy Mausoleum; and now that you have explained the circumstances behind your departure, this Mu is willing to help you keep Shimei's body intact until you can find a way in."

"You believe me?" Luo Binghe asks, taken aback. "Just—just like that?"

Mu Qingfang shrugs his shoulders. "My belief in you is irrelevant. I have known Qiu-shimei since she was sixteen; and if she chose to leave Shen-shixiong and return to you on that day in Jinlan, there must have been a reason."

"If she had not come to me, I would have blown the city to pieces in my grief. That was all the reason Shizun needed."

"I have no doubt of it," Mu Qingfang replies, with a wry turn at the corner of his mouth. "But from what Ning-shizhi told me afterwards, Qiu-shimei stopped suspecting you immediately; and before she breathed her last, she asked you to flee and build a life somewhere beyond the reach of the great sects now that she could no longer protect you herself. Was it not so?"

Luo Binghe swallows. Run away, Binghe, Shen Yuan had begged, as she lay dying in Luo Binghe's arms. Run somewhere that they'll never find you, and live a good life for my sake. Please.

The mere thought of her last moments turns his stomach. She had not even been angry at him when she asked if he sent the sowers—she only assumed, because she thought he had the right to revenge himself upon Shen Qingqiu for sending him into the Abyss—and instead of explaining himself to her calmly, he had unsheathed Xin Mo in his anguish and driven his heart to death.

"Why have you condoned any of this?" he asks Mu Qingfang. "By rights, you should be fighting alongside Liu Qingge to lay Shizun to rest, and yet..."

Mu Qingfang sighs.

"Your Shizun was miserable with Shen-shixiong," he says bluntly. "I spent years prescribing prophylactic teas to him, so that he would not carry home some disease from the brothels and sicken her. I watched her come near to bleeding to death under my hands not long before you joined the sect, because Shen-shixiong could not keep himself from whipping his charges whenever the mood struck him; and after he forced you to fight that demon at Qiong Ding, I had to tell Qiu-shimei that she would never bear a living child because of Without-A-Cure.

"It grieved us all to see her mourn you these last three years. She clearly cherished you above all else; so if she could be brought back, and be given the chance to live well at your side, then perhaps..."

His voice trails off into silence.

"It is true that I ought to be following Liu-shixiong's example," he admits, after a moment. "But Lady Sha assured me that Qiu-shimei could be brought back to life in full health as long as her body was properly preserved. In that, I can assist you; and since I have every reason to believe she would be glad to return to you, there is no need for you and Cang Qiong to be enemies. You and I and my shixiongdi want only the best for your Shizun: so in that, we can consider ourselves united."

With that, Mu Qingfang bows once again before retreating back down the corridor after Gongyi Xiao.

Luo Binghe lets himself back into the bedroom, overcome, and falls to his knees at Shizun's side.

"Did you hear that?" he whispers, pressing her icy hands to his lips. "Don't worry, Shizun. This disciple will bring you back. I swear it."

[mikkeneko]

Shen Yuan should transmigrate as Qiu Haitang! He *could* break himself and SJ out of the horrible Qiu household, but Qiu Haitang showing up “early” only to kidnap SQQ’s littlest disciple would also be funny.

"Why are you here?" Shen Qingqiu asks flatly, as he leaves the bamboo house with Ming Fan in tow.

"I heard that you took on a new disciple," says the woman before him.

Qiu Haitang does not meet his eyes. She has not looked him in the eye for the better part of twenty years—not since that first murder on the road, when she came to bring him a basket of food and found Shen Qingqiu and Wu Yanzi with blood still dripping from their hands—but even so, her avoidance of him has never grown easier to bear.

"I did," Shen Qingqiu replies. "What of it?"

"I told you not to," Qiu Haitang says, her hands curling into fists. "That—Li Haoran was to be the last. You promised me."

"Ning Yingying wanted a shidi."

"I don't give a damn what Ning Yingying wanted," she says sharply. "You swore you would never take in another boy."

Silence.

"If I go into the house," Qiu Haitang continues, her voice deceptively calm, "tell me, Shen Jiu—what will I find?"

At this, Ming Fan steps forward and stretches out his hands in supplication. "Shiniang—"

"Be silent," she snaps. "Your shifu is a lost cause, and that can't be helped; but if Disciple Ming cannot learn from his mistakes, then you don't need to speak in front of me. Did you even think of coming to fetch me when you saw that he had picked up another little shidi to bully?"

With that, Qiu Haitang snorts and sweeps past him into the bamboo house, where Luo Binghe is still kneeling in the middle of the front room with tea trickling down his tearstained cheeks.

"There, don't cry," Shen Qingqiu hears her whisper. "You didn't do anything wrong. Can you look up so that jiejie can dry your face?"

"Shizun—shizun told me to kneel," the little wretch in the house replies, half-sobbing. "It's this lowly one's fault. I offended him, so of course this disciple should stay here and reflect."

"You didn't offend anyone," Qiu Haitang says gently. "He has a terrible temper, and he never learned how to control it. It's not your fault."

"But—!"

Qiu Haitang hushes Luo Binghe again, after which Shen Qingqiu hears nothing further: for at that moment, his wife seemed to have recalled the existence of the bamboo house's privacy wards—but later that evening, she returns to house with a sheaf of papers and flings them down on Shen Qingqiu's desk.

"Sign these," she tells him.

Shen Qingqiu glances at the first page in bemusement. "What are they?"

"Dissolution papers for Luo Binghe's discipleship. What else?" Qiu Haitang's lip curls. "From now on, I'll be his Shizun instead."

He lifts an eyebrow. "Did Yue Qingyuan give you these? He approved when I asked for that little beast, you know."

"He must have thought you'd wait at least a week before doing something to the child," Haitang says coldly. "I told him that he could either give Binghe to me or send him to Bai Zhan; and he was determined to save face for you, so he chose me."

And then, when Shen Qingqiu does not reply:

"Sign them, Shen Jiu. You don't want to know what I'll do to you otherwise."

At this, Shen Qingqiu picks up a brush and signs his name at the bottom of the dissolution form: for the last time he and Qiu Haitang fought in earnest, she fed him a cursed tonic that had him babbling in tongues before a hundred-odd dignitaries at Huan Hua.

"Thank you," she bites out: and with that, she turns on her heel and blows out of the bamboo house like a gust of chill wind.

Not for the first time, Shen Qingqiu finds himself wishing that he had left Qiu Haitang behind at the Qiu estate when he fled with Wu Yanzi. But her father and brother were dead, and she believed that she was betrothed to him; and when he saw her great brown eyes staring at him through the flames of her home, some power beyond Shen Qingqiu's own had prevented him from turning his back on her.

She was not meant to accept when I offered to take responsibility for her, he thinks dully, watching through the open window as his wife strides towards the women's compound on the other side of the mountain. She hated me then, and she hates me now—so what was it all for?

Shen Qingqiu has pondered upon that question night and day since he and Qiu Haitang first bowed to one another, not long after his instatement as Qing Jing's head disciple; and he is no nearer to the answer by the morning he is widowed, nearly a decade later.

What point was there in saving her? he wonders, as a grown Luo Binghe weeps in the streets of Hua Yue with Qiu Haitang's still body cradled to his breast. Would it not have been better for her to die after the first betrayal, rather than live to be betrayed twice?

"Why are you all just standing there?" he hears Ming Fan roar. "That's our Shiniang! What are you afraid of? At most, that white-eyed wolf she raised will just beat us all to death!"

"Leave it."

Ming Fan stares at Shen Qingqiu in dismay, his eyes so swollen with tears that he scarcely seems able to see through them. "What is Shizun saying? What do you mean, leave her? She's our only Shiniang—she's your wife!"

Shen Qingqiu gazes at the cooling corpse in Luo Binghe's arms for a little while longer; and then, at length, he turns away.

"Your Shiniang's end was of her own making, Ming Fan," Shen Qingqiu says, already starting towards the group of screeching cultivators trapped behind the wards at the other end of the street.

"Shen-furen has made her bed. Let her lie in it."

[mikkeneko]

I've been thinking of the "Can Granny Weatherwax beat Bugs Bunny" question and this is my full take for Discworld characters:

Vimes - Cares too much, too easy to piss off. Has the innate chase instinct that makes characters run into walls with realistic tunnels painted on them. Might get to arrest Bugs Bunny but the beast will just slip out of the handcuffs to help him lock them, then walk out of the jail cell to have a union mandated coffee break.

Ridcully - Classic hunting season scenario, but has enough charisma to probably still get a few good shots off before the inevitable.

Rest of the wizards - No survivors, only Bugs.

Carrot - The intense near-magical narrative aura of well meaning innocence should make him immune, Bugs will likely be forced to be the villain of the episode.

Lord Vetinari - Flattened by a comically large anvil in the first few minutes of the episode, unclear if it was all a part of his long term strategy or not.

Moist - Has the 'lovable trickster getting away with it' energy, but nowhere near Bugs level. Already fell for the "old lady who swallowed a fly" scenario with the stamp slugs once, won't fare any better here.

Death - Definitely one of those "character is trying to avoid death" episodes, would go back and forth. Might actually get to end Bugs but his spirit will reappear in Death's domain and ruin his garden.

Nanny Ogg - The ultimate in anti-Bugs technology, a gleefully annoying old lady who doesn't give a fuck and definitely won't be the first to instigate the plot bearing conflict. This is a full sweep, he's the episode antagonist.

Granny Weatherwax - Too win-motivated to not lose. Would have to break the story to have any chance. Might do it.

Magrat - Will have sappy ideas about helping the poor animal which honestly has the 50:50 chance of either getting slapsticked or Bugs ending in a ye olde stroller&pacifier gag.

Colon&Nobby - Designed in a lab to be totaled by Bugs Bunny.

Tiffany Aching - A child that also has a large pan that is the perfect thing to hit someone over the head with and make a BOIOIOINGGG sound, so great odds.

[mikkeneko]

#mis read Zuko as Kuzco#was like huh. a llama?! he was supposed to be the moon?!#???#anyway they should hang out - via @nebulations

tbh people don't give zuko enough credit like wtf are you supposed to say when someone hits you with "my girlfriend turned into the moon" like. damn. that is in fact rough buddy

[mikkeneko]

the Wriothesler

[mikkeneko]

Using QR codes to link things in circumstances where it would be inconvenient to laboriously type in a url by hand are all well and good, practical, I see it. But now I get emails like "Here's our event! Scan the qr code to register!" with a jpeg of a flyer and no url in the email or on the image. Oh you want me to...hold up my phone to a computer screen to scan a jpeg email attachment to get to a website? Instead of you just linking it to me, in the email you have already sent me, that I am already looking at on my computer? That's what you want me to do? Are you sure?

[mikkeneko]

Lantana

[mikkeneko]

Rewatching the Untamed and there was this one shot where Jin Guangyao walks past in the foreground and it looks exactly like this.