missing-motivation - Tumblr blog

[missing-motivation]

Day 2 here we go

Yesterday was productive. Wasn't reflected so much in my time tracking but I actually did get a lot done.

Big plans for today. Already meditated so on to practice questions. I'm also thinking of going for a swim and going climbing today. But we'll see how I do on time.

Starting to remember that I've already realized that I'm most motivated by failure or being close to failure. As soon as I feel good or am not stressed, my motivation levels plummet.

[missing-motivation]

Nothing's changed. but we're trying again

So I'm back.

I'm studying for the USMLE Step 1 exam. I've already pushed it back once and I'm about to push it back another time. Basically to the latest possible date I have to take it by before I go back to school.

It's been a rollercoaster. I thought I was doing ok with getting the motivation to study but after a few weeks it fizzled out and I was doing the bare minimum. It seemed like not a big deal at the time - when the exam was still weeeeeks away.

Now that there's an actual deadline I'm starting to the feel the pressure. But I don't have a clear plan of attack for my studies. It essentially comes down to doing a lot of practice questions and hoping that I retain the information.

There is good news, however. I've been failing my official practice tests so far, but today I took one that I did fairly well on. This practice test is considered easier than the ones I've been taking and the actual exam is considered to be somewhere in between, difficulty wise. Having done well - I'm surprised I don't feel more relieved about my improvement. But, no time to dwell on that, gotta keep doing practice questions.

So, here, from now on, daily, I will be posting a recap of how many hours of studies I did and what I got done to get me closer to my goal. I'm using the apps ATracker, WaterDo, and Forest to help me.

Wish me Luck and give the accountability turns out I very much need

[missing-motivation]

The scary thing this Halloween is me not having any energy to participate or dress up. It’s always been my favorite day of the year, and now, I’ve entered the dreaded, boring, depressing ~adulthood~

[missing-motivation]

[missing-motivation]

So school’s not going great and so I’ve decided to spend time learning how to build computers

[missing-motivation]

Buffing in a 1:1 mixture of oil (olive, vegetable, etc) and white vinegar onto scratched wood really fixes the appearance. Who knew

[missing-motivation]

I really like all the material I’m learning in my classes, I just hate how it’s taught and that makes me hate a lot of everything else

[missing-motivation]

I think i’ve just realized that I don’t like school. I complain when I’m just being lectured at and I complain when we’re made to do group activities in a flipped classroom setting. Weird, especially since I signed up to be in school for another 8 years.

[missing-motivation]

aaand just impulse bought a calligraphy set from Etsy. My future:

Having a good mental health day 😌

[missing-motivation]

That didn’t last too long...now trying to romanticize my 1am anatomy studying by lighting a candle and putting on 4 diamonds rings

Having a good mental health day 😌

[missing-motivation]

Having a good mental health day 😌

[missing-motivation]

[missing-motivation]

Illustrations from The Black Cat magazine, vol. 16 (1910-1911).

[missing-motivation]

so metropolitan museum of art has a register of books they’ve published that are out of print and that you can download for free! they’re mostly books on art, archeology, architecture, fashion and history and i just think that’s super useful and interesting so i wanted to share! you can find all of the books available here!

[missing-motivation]

i cant believe this is a real photo

[missing-motivation]

https://bookshop.org/

[missing-motivation]