missmaryjanejr - Tumblr blog

[missmaryjanejr]

i wish i had someone who made me feel as though i deserve to rest

im so tired.

[missmaryjanejr]

ive never had anyone cry in the bathtub with me

why didnt u ever crawl in

i always left space for you

[missmaryjanejr]

i promise not to ask about it

what made you treat me that way

why it was so easy for you to walk away

i told you

be gentle

and you kissed me when i cried

why was it so easy

to put me to the side

i think about you often

all the time, to be exact

i think about your freckles and the marks i leave on your back

i think about your lips

the magic that they do

i think of how much i wanted to be with you

i have this feeling down in my gut

it hasn’t gone away

i told you how it hurt me, i made sure you understood

you changed faces on me

hurt me the best way you knew

i miss the safe and the sweet of it

i miss going to sleep to dream of it

i miss the anticipation and the lust

i miss you and all that i thought that you brought

i feel so fucking stupid for falling for it again

demoted to a body

ready to sin again

the bruises you left stayed longer than you

i feel disgusting and worthless

i really liked you

i thought you liked me too

i feel dumb and ugly and stupid and fat

thats why you didnt want me

im not hungry (im starving)

“i just had a snack”

i feel dumb and stupid and hopeless again

i feel like love isnt made for me, not even like

i feel like my body is only good for one thing

when your tits are better than your thoughts no one cares what you think

i feel like crying i really want to

they all well up and dont come out

i really really liked you

the last time i really really liked anyone a part of me died

he took away my body, my choices, my future, my life

every single day i think about what he did

he raped me while i was sleeping

i let you in my bed.

i dont ever want to be your girlfriend

i hate the way you lie

i miss your smile and your very pretty eyes

it’d be worth all the consequences

to see you again

i know that i’ll feel safe

and i know i wont get hurt

you’ll always be an arm’s distance

i wont let myself get hurt

if i had one more time i promise i wont ask any questions

i ll keep them all inside

i promise i wont ask

i dont want to talk about it

it feels like tequila before the lime

[missmaryjanejr]

i think ill miss you for a little while longer

i think ill miss you and ill tell the bartender to make the drinks stronger

i think ill miss you as i spend more time with my father

i think ill miss you as i tell myself each day to try a little harder

i think ill miss you as i notice that all my clothes have gotten two sizes looser

i know ill miss you for a long while longer