mitsukiyaki

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Old men on grindr: “Want to be my piss slave? Daddy wants to teach you a lesson you dirty slut”

Me:

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im gods weakest faggot

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Triple the obese lynx budget

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how it feels to stop tossing and turning and get up to piss

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told my roommate dracula was an epistolary novel because it’s made up of letters and she was like. of course it’s made of letters it’s a book

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“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

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imagine how good it must feel to press a gun to your temple after a bad day and just hold it there with your eyes closed for a few minutes before sighing and putting it away

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trick me once shame on you. shame on you. shame on you shame on you i hate you. i ltierally trusted you.

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Where can I find your pronouns? --

lets find out together

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this tweet is so layered to me

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