mlblogs-blog

[mlblogs-blog]

Diary

This is to put my thoughts into form, because I some, and I’m lacking a space to throw them at, irl, but also I think my twitter has its limitations : the characters limit while being an exercise of itself sometimes excuses lazy thinking - and my audience is too large now.

Sometimes I “livre” myself more, and get no engagement. i figure I might as well find a space for the content that enters that category, and be able to write something more honest, free of audience bias.

Mostly I just wanna exercise my writing, maybe at last build a portfolio of writing I’m not too self conscious of, as I have been interested in this nebulous “writing” activity without ever doing it so much in my

When I met Rachel first the first time recently she did say that my tweets denote a literary sensibility. Yet, I have not had many life experiences lately that might enrich my imaginary, to be quite honest. It’s not like I push myself to encounter the réel so much.

My expression is stunted, being in this bilingual approximate, torn between identities, longing, words.

I am also hoping I could write not in the first person, while popular in anglophone essays, it does still hurts my sensibilities to be using it.

My friend Fibre, who’s an actual writer, writes a certain amount (huge) of words a day. I’m hoping that regular practice will help me and facilitate future needs, especially if I start school again in the Fall.

I wrote a blog post back in the Summer, to tell of my upstate New York escapade. My brother said I wrote like a 9 year old. I’m still not really sure what he meant by that. And I feel sort of hurt. Recently I was mocking the writing of a girl I met and he m’a rappelée à l’ordre, saying that it’s always better to do than to criticize. Holier than thou since he’s the biggest troll I know. I’am aware he writes himself, but he doesn’t share. So what is the point exactly.

I don’t read much either. Is it too late? for my brain cells. Do I need to discipline myself into a routine? Will I ever succeed?

Maybe I’ll be able to share more of my depressing thoughts and expand on loneliness without feeling like I’m alienating my audience of supposedly friends and strangers.

It’s ok if I do this for fun or else. I don’t wanna be one of these freelance self-femme-sandwich forced to advertise themselves through a tweet and RTs.

I really appreciated watching younger and having a fictionalized comedic foray into the publishing world which I’d never really thought about before. I think if I were an editor, I’d be maybe too radical. I wish I had friends to work with. How do I create those opportunities for myself. Everything is always too long. How can I put myself in a position of argumentative authority like that when I’m so young and inexperienced. I’m definitely not the optimal version of the self I could be.

I’ve had this tumblr in mind for a while so I have a few prompts I was thinking about already. Maybe I’ll list my pitch here or another note. Need to be careful about not binge writing, and maybe rather than fragments actually publishing something with coherence, as short as it may be. It’s ok because today is the first post and diary. I’m waking my thumbs form a long hibernation. I only type with like two fingers.