mollysunder

[mollysunder]

i think it's cute when americans talk about being from the 'great state of connecticut' or like 'the great state of wisconsin.' not when it's texas or new york or california obviously because then there's the fear that they're being serious. but when americans adopt that really earnest tone and are like 'god bless the great state of delaware' in response to a picture of a seagull swallowing an entire ziplock bag full of cheese-its. I think that's very endearing

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Not especially.

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the years have made me weird and strange to talk to. but still i must post

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projection

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You're a royal attendant slowly realising that you've lost track of which of the young princess' numerous anti-assassination body doubles is the real one. The royal portraits are so idealised that they look nothing like her, so you can't figure it out that way, and the Queen is a shitty absentee mom who doesn't remember what her own daughter looks like and routinely gets them mixed up, so she'd be no help even if you dared to ask. None of them will break character. You're beginning to suspect they're doing this on purpose.

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I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

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New Secret Knots comic: "Cryptid".

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Lake Como, Lombardy, Italy by chrisroams

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Disney's Fantasia (1940)

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Fanciest Feast

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July Rent/Move out

Okay, good news! I've got a fish on the hook (read: an interested potential roommate that doesn't seem to be creepy) to get out of this vaguely suburbia psycho situation I'm stuck in. I can't tell you what a relief that is after the last person turned out to be a scam.

But obviously I still need to make it there, so if you want to and are in a position to (I stress that heavily, please do not put yourself at risk! Do not feel bad if you can't! Please.) I've opened up Ko-Fi again.

My offer to anyone who donates to keep a roof over my head is that I will happily write a fic, provide alpha/beta reading, moodboards, or anything else you can think of as a thank you gift, just give the word! (if you’ve changed your mind about your request since giving one, let me know! I try to reach out before I start the fic to make sure it’s something you’re still keen on, but updates are appreciated. 🤗 And there's also no time limit, so if you haven't given a request, you can do so later. No rush.)

JULY RENT: $154/800$

Ko-Fi | Paypal

if you’d like or need to (either is valid, taking you by the hand and guiding you to settings) block these posts, I tag #berrybad, so if you add it under both tags & post, poof! :]

[mollysunder]

Why isn't "too scary" a good enough reason to never drive a car

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"-we go together like a Chanel No.5 and mace"

DnD blorbos. Taurus the minotaur owned by @0x00047145 and my satyr, Butterscotch Toffee

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Landlord wants the grass cut in the middle of a heat wave ohh my god THE GRASS KEEPS THINGS COOL

our yard has more fireflies out of the entire neighborhood, it attracts flycatchers and several insectivorous species I fucking hate lawn culture so much

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Ney Matogrosso for Vogue Brasil | ph. Guilherme Nabhan (2025)

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fearmongers

2025

24x30”

oil on canvas