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[momentsbeforemass]

If only

(for someone who’s stuck in an “if only” state of mind)

If only                .

We fill in the blank in a thousand different ways.

If only I could go back there again. If only he hadn’t said that. If only I could talk to her. If only they hadn’t done that.

No matter how we fill in the blank, they’re all really just ways of wishing for something we used to have. Or something we wish we had. Or something we never had. Or who we thought someone was.

Regardless, we don’t have it right now.

Really, it’s a little way of grieving for what we’ve lost.

It’s understandable. It’s okay to grieve. Because all of us have lost something. Including things that we hoped for, but that never happened.

Those losses? They’re the kind of losses that put us in an “if only” state of mind.

Wondering what things would have been like, if only…

Wondering why it didn’t last, if only…

A state of mind in which we can easily get stuck looking off in the distance. Whether it’s to a past we’ve lost. Or to a future that may never come. Or a bit of both.

Looking off in the distance isn’t the problem. It’s getting stuck. Putting all of our hopes, our dreams, our plans, our willingness to be who God created us to be – off there, in the distance.

Whether it’s a backward looking “I wish I still could…” Or a forward looking “someday, I’m going to…”

It leaves our life – and God’s purpose for our life – for another day. One lost long ago and never to come again. Or one off in the future that may never get here. Which means that it comes at a price.

Where we get stuck looking off in the distance, it comes at the price of now. It comes at the price of discarding the only moment that God has given to us. The only moment that we ever own. This present one.

Which is why now, more than ever, we need to heed that voice of the Spirit. That impulse to live out God’s call for our lives where we are. Not waiting for the big moment when everything is just right. But in the small context of today.

In truth, that’s the only way God’s call for our lives ever can be lived.

Don’t pine for the past. Don’t wait for the future.

Use what God has given you for this day. To do what God is calling you to do. Now.

As St. Catherine of Siena put it, “To the servant of God every place is the right place, and every time is the right time.”

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

What are you holding onto?

What we hold onto matters. Because you and I can only carry so much.

Even though we often act like there’s no limit to what we can carry.

The truth is that everything we pick up, everything we hold onto reduces our capacity to carry other things.

When I would carry my cat (who would randomly decide that he was incapable of movement and was now a limp noodle), I couldn’t also pick up my dog (who had no idea that he weighed 75 pounds) just because he saw the cat and decided that he wanted to be carried as well.

Sorry. I can only carry so much.

That’s not just true for goofy house pets. It’s true for life in general.

Whether we’re talking about pets or groceries, worries or cares, you and I can only carry so much.

And if our hands are full of worries and cares, problems and anxieties, you and I won’t have the capacity to carry other things.

Including things we might actually want (as opposed to worries and cares). Including the good stuff. Like God’s best for our lives.

What works against you and me is habit. We get in a habit of picking stuff up and carrying it around. Just because it wants us to pick it up and carry it around.

Like my limp noodle cat. Who wanted to be carried.

But who would also make a miraculous recovery and start doing unnecessary parkour off the top of the couch. If I didn’t pick him up.

What you and I need to remember is that we have a choice. Just because something wants you to pick it up and carry it around doesn’t mean you have to.

I’m not saying don’t deal with your worries and cares, your problems and anxieties.

But there’s a big difference between dealing with your worries and cares - and picking them up and carrying them around like a beloved pet.

So, how do you do that?

First, know that you have a choice. Then know that you have help.

You don’t have to deal with your worries and cares (or even carry them around) by yourself.

In fact, you shouldn’t. Because holding onto your worries and cares, your problems and anxieties is one of the subtlest forms of the dreary old sin of pride.

And there is nothing so effective at separating you and me from the ones who love us best (including God) like pride. It does that by making sure that our hands are full, that we have no room for the good that anyone would do for us (including God).

Instead, take the help offered by the One who loves you best.

No matter what it is. No matter what wants you to pick it up and carry it around.

God isn’t just waiting to help you. God wants to help you.

Not someday, when you’ve got it all figured out. But right now, when you don’t.

“Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.”

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Why do you believe?

Why do you believe?

It’s a question that gets a lot of different answers.

Sometimes the answer sounds like they memorized the Catechism.

Other times, it’s a personal version of the 19th Psalm – “the heavens declare the glory of God; the firmament shows forth His handiwork.”

Sometimes it’s the fruit of years of study and deep thinking.

Other times, it’s the story of a life-changing moment.

Sometimes the answer can be heart-breaking.

Or, they may not be able to put it into words at all. Except to say that they do believe.

Which answer is the right one? Which answer is best?

In today’s Gospel, Jesus responds to Philip’s struggle to believe this way, “believe me that I am in the Father and the Father is in me, or else, believe because of the works themselves.”

Which means that God’s answer to the question – “which answer is best?” – is a simple “Yes.”

As God sees it, they are all the right answers.

Whether it’s something from the Catechism that’s stayed with you since you were a child. Or the glory of God’s creation that speaks to your heart.

Whether it’s the story of a life-changing moment. Or something you can’t put into words.

If it leads you to the God who has always loved you?

If it helps you to drop everything that wants to get in the way? So that can you turn towards Home, so that you can rush headlong towards the One who is waiting for you with open arms?

Then that’s the best answer.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

I don’t feel God any more

“I don’t feel God any more…”

It may not start like this. But this is at the heart of countless conversations I’ve had with people about God. And their relationship with God.

I’m humbled by their trust. And I’m impressed by the courage that it takes to talk about it with somebody in a clergy collar.

For most of us, a moment like this comes from two places – kind of at the same time. Something traumatic. Whether it happened to us or we did it doesn’t make much difference. Plus our feelings about it.

Fueled by our memories of whatever it was, if we’re not careful (and sometimes even if we are) our feelings can grow until they come between us and others. Blocking our connections with others. Making us feel cut off from even our closest relationships. Including God.

When this happens to us, we need two things. Help dealing with whatever is at the source of our feelings that are cutting us off. And assurance that no permanent damage has been done. That someone is still there for us.

Which is why today’s Gospel is so important. No one who comes to God can be separated from God. Even by the worst things in life. Whether it happened to us. Or we did it ourselves.

As Jesus puts it, “No one can take them out of my hand.”

And that includes us. We can’t do it either. Which means that our relationship with God doesn’t depend on how we feel.

God loves us too much to let the worst things in life – or our feelings about them – get in the way.

If you think about it, this shouldn’t surprise us. Because the best relationships in our lives are like that.

As with real friends, healthy marriages, there’s more there than just feelings.

Why would it be any different with God? I mean, where do you think we got it from?

If this is where you find yourself (and we all do at one point or another, if we’re honest), don’t try to go it alone. And don’t beat yourself up.

Get the help you need. And know that God will always be there for you.

No matter how you feel.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Math sucks

I struggled with math in high school.

Before then, I’d done alright in math. I wasn’t the best, but I could keep up.

That changed freshman year. With a teacher who explained things. Once.

If you didn’t get it the first time, he would (grudgingly) repeat the same explanation. But that was it.

If you needed him to break it down for you. Or to explain it a different way, you were out of luck.

The school found out about it. And sacked him at the end of the year.

But for me, the damage was done. I had convinced myself that I was bad at math. And that math sucked.

With that idea stuck in my head? The rest of my formal education gave me the grades to prove it.

It wasn’t until years later, when my kids started needing need help with their math homework, that I learned the truth. I wasn’t bad at math.

My “I’m bad at math/math sucks” idea? Had no connection to my actual abilities.

I had internalized my experience with an awful teacher. I had convinced myself that I couldn’t do something.

All because I couldn’t get it perfect on the first try.

When all I actually needed was a better/different explanation to help me get it.

Maybe it wasn’t math for you. But a lot of us can tell a similar story. Whether it happened with a subject in school, or sports, or music, or a job, or a relationship. It’s a trap that is all too easy to fall into.

It’s one of those things that only becomes obvious with the awful clarity of hindsight. And one that can take years to dig out of.

It’s a stark contrast to what we see it in today’s Gospel.

Where Jesus is explaining His love and care for people in an extended metaphor. But the people He’s speaking to just aren’t getting it.

The best part? What happens next.

Unlike my awful math teacher, Jesus doesn’t grudgingly repeat the same explanation. Or belittle them for not getting it perfect on the first try.

Instead (in a move that reveals the heart of God), Jesus gives them a different explanation. More direct, more obvious.

If you read the rest of the chapter, they keep struggling. But Jesus doesn’t give up. Jesus understands where they are struggling. And keeps working with them. Until they get it.

It’s a moment that reveals a lot about God.

That if you and I don’t get it perfect on the first try, that won’t stop God. God will keep working with you. And working with you. Until you get it.

Because God loves you too much to quit.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

How can you tell?

When you read the Bible, you’re going to run into a lot of ideas about it.

Some of them are helpful. Some of them are just weird. Some of them are anything but helpful.

Some of the most harmful? The ones that boil down to making the Bible say what you want it to.

Sadly, no one has a monopoly on abusing the Bible this way. The people who do it come from every political and theological corner you can think of.

One of the worst? Picking and choosing what parts of the Bible to read literally (this happened, here’s what God said, etc.) and what parts to read as allegory or myth (a story is being told to make a point, a legend that reveals something about God, etc.).

Not that we shouldn’t do that. We should read the literal stuff as literal and the allegories as allegory. It’s just that some of the ideas about how to do that are so easily abused.

And easily used to abuse.

So how can you tell?

It’s easier than you think. You don’t need a degree in literature or theology.

Because you’re already doing it. Here’s what I mean:

“A sower went out to so some seed. And as he sowed, some of the seed fell on…”

Right. Before Jesus unpacks it, you know that this one is an allegory. It has that “once upon a time” feel to it.

But even if the farmer was an actual person, that’s not why Jesus is telling the story.

Jesus is not critiquing first century agricultural practices. Jesus is using the story to make a point. And we all know it.

Today’s Gospel is the bread of life discourse, where Jesus tells people that He is the bread of life. And then goes on to explain exactly what He means.

There are a lot of people who want this to be an allegory. For a lot of reasons.

It’s not.

How can I say that? How can you tell that Jesus is being literal about this one?

The reactions it gets. And way the way Jesus responds to those reactions.

The first time Jesus announces that He is the bread of life, no one who heard it understood it as an allegory.

How do I know this? Their reaction – “How can this man give us his Flesh to eat?”  

Making it clear that they have it right, that this is no metaphor, Jesus doesn’t explain the symbolism (like He does with the parable of the sower).

Instead (in tomorrow’s Gospel), Jesus doubles down on what He said, on what they’re hanging up on. “Unless you eat the Flesh of the Son of Man and drink his Blood, you do not have life within you.”

Making it clear that they understood Jesus to be speaking literally?

The way that people respond to Jesus doubling down - many of them quit following Jesus and leave.

That’s not how people respond to an allegory. Nobody leaves after Jesus explains the parable of the sower.

If you ever wondered why Catholics are so hung up on the Eucharist? Why we believe what we believe?

This is what’s behind it.

We’re just taking Jesus at His word. And then trying to live it.

That’s the formula for everything that’s right about our Faith. And something we cannot do enough.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

God or…

There are basically two ways to deal with God.

In our relationship with God, we can follow the direction that Jesus gives us in today’s Gospel. When He says (quoting Isaiah), “They shall all be taught by God.” Or we can do the teaching ourselves.

That is, we can either open our hearts and our minds to God. And let God teach us who He is.

Or we can teach God who He is.

Our relationship with God will be radically different, depending on who we let do the teaching.

If you and I do the teaching about God, we will soon find that we have made something to suit our own preferences. Whether it’s something that we’re comfortable with.

Or something that we’re comfortable ignoring.

We’ll make it work for a while. But in time, we’ll find ourselves further and further from anything real. Further and further from anything that will ever satisfy the hole in our hearts.

If we let God do the teaching, we’ll find ourselves drawing closer and closer to the source of reality itself.

If we persist, if keep letting God do the teaching, then we will find a peace and joy that can only come from satisfying our hearts by filling them with the very thing that they were meant to be filled with.

“The only One who can truly satisfy the human heart is the One who made it.”

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Angry

Have you ever known someone who was angry with everyone and everything, including God?

That anger can come from a lot of different places.

Sometimes it comes from loss.

Sometimes it comes from failure.

Sometimes it comes from fear.

Wherever it comes from, that anger is a sign.

It’s the sign of someone who has been hurt by people or by life. Maybe even by themselves.

That anger is also a response.

They’re trying to deal with something that wounded them at the deepest level.

They’re trying to protect themselves from ever being hurt that way again.

They’re lashing out. Often at those who had nothing to do with hurting them. Including God.

So how do we deal with those people?

The same way that God does. It’s what Jesus is showing us in today’s Gospel.

We deal with those people who are lost in their anger by not rejecting them.

This is not a passive thing. It’s more than sitting there, not doing…whatever to them.

This is an intentional, deliberate, aggressive refusal to reject them. An active, in-your-face love. A holy love.

It’s the love that God pours out without measure into our hearts. And theirs.

It’s the only thing that will ever work.

Only God’s love can deal with that kind of anger.

Only God’s love can heal that kind of hurt.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

God listens to you

There are times when the Bible shows us the heart of God. Today’s Gospel is one of them.

When the crowd asks Jesus, “What sign can you do, that we may see and believe in you?” Their words are laced with vanity, with cynicism.

They’re not like the father who’s desperate to have his son healed. Who cries out to Jesus, “Lord, I believe – help my unbelief!”

What they’re really saying is, “Impress me. Entertain me.”

So where the do we see the heart of God in this? We see it with how Jesus responds.

Jesus isn’t distracted by their vanity. Or their cynicism.

Jesus doesn’t tell them to come back with an honest request, when they have the courage to actually say what they mean.

Instead, Jesus hears the desperate need that they’re hiding behind that veneer of vanity and cynicism. He hears what they are afraid to actually say.

Jesus hears their fear of what other people will think. He hears their fear of disappointment – of having someone fail them or betray them. Again.

Jesus responds not to their words, but to their needs. To the hidden, heartfelt plea that they’re afraid to even put into words.

This is the heart of God.

God loves us so much that He gives us what we need, not what we say we want.

God doesn’t turn us away because of our prayers, or how we pray, or our attitude, or what we ask for.

God loves you so much that He doesn’t listen to what you say. God listens to you.

God sees through all of the externals, even in our prayers, to answer not what we asked for, but to answer our needs. To answer us.

God understands our prayers better than we do.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

I’ll do it with you.

“I’ll do it with you” is one of those statements that hits us where we live. Second only to “I love you.”

When it’s said by someone who means it and who follows through? Well, you and I both have a short list of those people in our lives. We rely on them. We trust them.

But it’s more than that.

When someone says, “I’ll do it with you.” And they mean it. When they follow through by shouldering one of life’s burdens with you, it creates a bond. A connection. One that goes well beyond the moment in which that bond was formed.

And one that changes us. It gives a sense of relief, a calm, a peace.

When we’re facing down the hard stuff in life. And someone we know we can rely on says, “I’ll do it with you.”

We treasure the people in our lives who say that, and do that, for us.

And yet, somehow you and miss it when it gets said by the One who has meant it from all eternity. The One who followed through to the point of laying down His life for us.

It’s the point of today’s Gospel. And something that you and I can never forget.

That no matter what’s happening in your life. No matter how far you think you’ve strayed. No matter what you’re going through.

God is saying to you, “I’ll do it with you.”

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Snails

(by request)

“I don’t understand it.”

It’s something all of us say. In a thousand different ways.

Maybe with an honest question. Admitting we don’t know? That’s the first step in learning.

Too often though, we’re afraid of admitting we don’t know. We’re uncomfortable with the humility that an honest question requires.

And instead of the honest question, we still reveal that we don’t understand. But we do it in ways that keep us from understanding.

Maybe we make baseless assumptions about something. Or simplify it to the point of error. Or give up trying to understand it.

Or brand it as impossible. Like Philip in today’s Gospel. With the feeding of the 5,000.

Thank God (literally) that our lack of understanding has zero impact on the things that you and I don’t understand.

I’ve always been amazed at snails, at the way they move. How they do it without any feet or legs. I can’t explain it.

Yet somehow, they do. My lack of understanding has never stopped a single snail from going wherever it wanted to go.

Only it’s not just true for snails. It’s true for all of God’s creation. And for God.

A lack of understanding on my part (or on anyone else’s part) has never held God back.

Philip’s lack of understanding of how 5,000 people could be fed with only 5 loaves and 2 fish didn’t hold God back.

God provided. Even though Philip never did see how it could happen.

The same is true for all of the unknowns that you and I are facing. We may not understand it all. And that’s okay.

We don’t have to have it all figured out. We just need to know the One who does.

Because our lack of understanding of how it’s all going to work out won’t hold God back.

God provides. Even if we don’t see how it could happen.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Where are you from?

Where are you from?

It’s something we all want to know. Especially when we meet someone for the first time. Because knowing their frame of reference helps us to understand what they say and do.

There’s more to “where are you from” than just geography. It’s about the culture of a place.

The most important place, culture-wise? The culture that has the most impact on someone, even more than the culture that they’re from?

Is the culture that lives inside of them, their personal culture.

Their personal culture doesn’t just help you understand their frame of reference. Because of the way that it informs their understanding of things, and forms the way they respond to things, their personal culture tells you who they really are.

How can you tell what someone’s personal culture is? That’s what today’s Gospel is all about, when Jesus says,

“The one who is of the earth is earthly and speaks of earthly things…the one whom God sent speaks the words of God.”

That’s how you can spot it, especially in yourself.

If you’ve ever wondered about your internal culture (and you and I should, because tainting it is one of the most subtle tools the Enemy has to put distance between us and God), about what’s informing your understanding of things, about what’s forming the way you respond to things, here’s how to do it.

Listen to what you’re speaking about. Not the topics. Listen deeper, to the perspective that reveals what we’re really speaking about.

Are you and I speaking the words of God about things? Or are we speaking an earthly perspective?

If we’re angry? If we’re lashing out (no matter how “deserved” it might be)? If we’re owning…whoever? If we’re demeaning or excluding someone? If we’re railing against “them” and how wrong they are?

It means we’re speaking an earthly perspective. Showing the world our fears and our weakness, pushing away the good people and telling the rest how to hurt/manipulate us.  

It means that we’re not speaking the words of God.

It means that what’s going on inside us is carrying us away from God. That our personal culture is carrying us away from the good, the kind, the loving, the just, the holy.

So what are the words of God?

They are overflowing with the fruits of the Spirit, with “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.”

Those are the words of God. And they’re a sign that what’s going on inside us is carrying us towards God. That our personal culture is carrying us towards the good, the kind, the loving, the just, the holy.

Today, listen closely to what you’re saying. Be brutally honest. And remember that nothing you and I say is indifferent – everything is a sign of what’s going on inside us.

If it’s not carrying you towards the good, the kind, the loving, the just, the holy? Then it’s time to ask God for the grace to change your personal culture.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Context makes all the difference

There are two basic kinds of choices in life – small stuff and life changers. Most of the time, whether a choice is small stuff or a life changer doesn’t have much to do with the actual choice itself. What we’re choosing to do, whether it’s hard or easy.

The difference between small stuff and life changers comes from where we are in life. Context makes all the difference.

Catching a life preserver that’s being thrown to you isn’t all that hard to do.

For someone treading water in a pond, a few feet from the shore, the choice to catch a life preserver is small stuff. It really doesn’t matter either way.

But for someone treading water in the ocean, with no land in sight, the choice to catch a life preserver is anything but small stuff.

Context makes all the difference. And it’s this dynamic that’s at the heart of today’s Gospel.

Loving someone who already loves you unconditionally isn’t all that hard to do.

What today’s Gospel makes clear is the context of that choice when it comes to Jesus. And for you and me, the stakes couldn’t be higher.

Our context? On our own, we’re separated from God. Not because we’ve done anything bad. That’s just our default state of existence in this fallen world. That’s where we start from.

The long-term consequences of doing nothing about our separation from God are horrifying to contemplate. Both in this life and in eternity.

The One who is the most upset about this? Is the One that made us. God loves us too much to abandon us.

Which is the whole point of the divine search and rescue mission that is the Incarnation.

That’s the backstory of today’s Gospel, John 3:16.

God isn’t asking us to do something that’s all that hard to do – to love Someone who already loves us unconditionally. Someone is willing to pay the ultimate price just for the chance that we would love Him back (see Good Friday for details).

But for you and me, given our context, the stakes couldn’t be higher.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Peace in the present

Things are kind of scary right now.

Look at all of the crazy things that people did and said in the run up to yesterday’s eclipse.

Even if you knew nothing about all of the actual reasons to be worried in the world. the fact that people were having such unhinged reactions to an astronomical event (one that recurs somewhere on the planet every 18 months) is an unmistakable sign.

And that’s before you get into personal crises or anything that’s directly impacting people.

Of course, the people who were the loudest about the eclipse aren’t special. They were just venting their fears.

For the rest of us – the ones who kept our anxieties to ourselves – the people who were spouting nonsense are just the canaries in the coal mine.

Because things actually are kind of scary right now.

So much has been upended. Or is in flux. We’re left wondering what will happen next. Trying to figure out what we should do.

What to do? We’ve got some options.

We can stare backward. Desperate to go back to something we thought was normal, something we took for granted. Clinging to how things were. Idealizing it, warts and all.

Even though – truth be told – when we were in it, we did nothing but complain about it.

We can stare forward. Desperate to control what we don’t understand.

Trying to figure out what it all means like Nicodemus in today’s Gospel. In fear of a thousand ways that things could get even worse. Or never happen.

Even though – if we’re honest – all we’re doing is making ourselves more and more miserable.

Or we can be here. In the present. The only part of time that we can ever experience the way that God experiences all of time. The eternal present. Where everything is possible.

Indeed, it’s the only time when anything is possible.

The impulse that God has given you to reach out to someone who’s lonely?

The only time you can do something about it is in the present.

The spirit that God has put in you to help someone who needs help getting prescriptions or groceries?

The only time you can do something about it is in the present.

If you’re looking for the peace of God in all of this, it starts with things like that.

And it starts here. In the present.

The only time when anything is possible.

Because the present is where God is.

And God is waiting for you.  

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Just

(for someone who needs to hear it again)

I used to work with a guy who grew up in a poor neighborhood. His parents never finished high school. When the plant closed down and his dad got laid off, they lived in projects for a year.

But his parents bounced back. They got out of the projects. They worked hard. To make sure that he could go to college. 

They were so proud of him when he graduated. And he was so grateful for what they had given him.

He was one of the top performers where we worked. The guy who always mentored the new employees. The one you wanted on your team for a big project. 

But something in him was stuck in that neighborhood. 

I know this, because when opportunities came up for promotion, every time he would talk himself out of even applying. Even though with some of them, it was like the job description had been written just for him.

Every time, his response was a bunch of “justs.”

“I’m just a kid from the projects.”

“I just barely finished school.”

“I’m just lucky they haven’t fired me.”

It was sad to watch the opportunities go to other people. All because he never even tried. Because he saw himself as “just.”

And it couldn’t be farther from how God sees His children.

Look at today’s Gospel, the Annunciation. With the angel Gabriel talking to Mary. Telling her all about God’s plan for her.

Why is an angel talking to Mary? She’s no one important. 

All that stuff about genealogy at the beginning of the Gospel? About being of the House of David? That’s Joseph’s family. Mary’s family? Not even worth mentioning.  

To anyone else, Mary looks like just another nobody. But not to God.

The difference my friend and Mary? It comes down to one thing. Mary’s heart is open to seeing things God’s way.

And God sees Mary as just who He made her to be.

Just where she needs to be.

Just who He loves.

The same way that God sees you.

You are just who God made you to be.

Just where you need to be.

Just who God loves.

Today’s Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

The pattern

(for someone who’s drifting)

Let’s say you’ve got something big you’re taking your kids to. Your friends are getting married. And they’re making it a family-friendly event.

Even so, it’s something your kids have never done before. So you try to help them out. By explaining to them what’s going to happen. How it’s going to go.

No questions at first. In the days to come, questions start to trickle in. You answer all of them.

And each time, you take the opportunity to tell them what’s going to happen. Again, and again.

The day of the wedding? It’s a complete surprise to them. Like you never said a thing.

Sound familiar? It does to Jesus.

In the months leading up to Good Friday, Jesus told His disciples what would happen to Him. Jesus answered their all questions. Even the weird ones from Peter. Again, and again.

Good Friday? It’s a complete surprise to them. Like Jesus never said a thing.

Much less told them that He was coming back.

How do I know this?

This week’s Gospel readings. Not a single disciple of Jesus is thinking about what Jesus told them would happen. No one is having a lightbulb moment, going “oh, that’s what Jesus was talking about.”

Instead, some of them are hiding in fear. Others are giving up and walking home.

Those closest to Jesus? That’s today’s Gospel.

They bailed out. They’re back at their old jobs. Like none of it ever happened.

The only constant? Jesus.

And the way that Jesus responds. To each of them, to all of them.

Jesus doesn’t wait for any of them to figure it out. Or even remember what He told them.

The ones in hiding? Jesus hides with them.

The ones walking home? Jesus walks with them.

The ones back at their old jobs? Jesus goes to work with them.

It’s a pattern with Jesus.

Jesus loves them too much to wait for them to figure it all out.

Instead, Jesus is seeking them out. Right where they are.

Sound familiar? It should.

Because Jesus sees you and me the same way.

No matter what you’re doing. Or not doing. No matter how much your normal has been upended. No matter what direction you’re headed off in.

Even if you gave up.

Jesus loves you much to wait for you to figure it all out.

Instead, Jesus is seeking you out. Right where you are.

Today's Readings

[momentsbeforemass]

Making sense of it

(for someone who’s struggling to make sense of it all)

Why?

It’s the classic question of a three-year old. But it doesn’t stop there. Why is something we never stop asking.

There’s something about us that just wants to make sense of things. To know how they work and what they mean. To have it all figured out.

Sometimes we do a decent job of making sense of things – after the fact. But even that’s not 100%.

One of the hardest things you and I will ever do is make sense of things, while we’re in the middle of them.

And it seems like the more difficult, the more uncertain we are about things the stronger our desire to make sense of it becomes.

It’s almost like a downward spiral, one that keeps accelerating into itself as it goes. Until we’re more and more anxious, more and more upset. And literally desperate to understand.

The disciples that Jesus came to in today’s Gospel? That’s exactly where they were.

Whether it’s the disciples back then or us now, left to ourselves, we’re just going to keep making ourselves more anxious, more upset, more distracted. Unless we stop and let God step in, to break the spiral.

Which is why St. Francis de Sales’ classic advice couldn’t be more timely. Or more needful.

“The same everlasting Father who cares for you today will care for you tomorrow and every day.

Either he will shield you from suffering or give you unfailing strength to bear it.

Be at peace then and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginings.”

Today's Readings