monicdzej - Tumblr blog

[monicdzej]

Art isn't in the tools, material, equipment you use. It's in the way you see the world.

— Rick Rubin

[monicdzej]

i just want my books to consume me devour me unstring my bones and spit me out reborn.

[monicdzej]

Read, read, read. Read everything -- trash, classics, good and bad, and see how they do it. Just like a carpenter who works as an apprentice and studies the master. Read! You'll absorb it. Then write. If it's good, you'll find out. If it's not, throw it out of the window.

— William Faulkner.

[monicdzej]

is living in a bookstore too much to ask for?

[monicdzej]

Your twitchy and unsteady hands are NOT from an excessive consumption of sugar and caffiene. You come from a bloodline that traces back to mighty sorcerers, your nerves are less suited for activities like surgery and more for the swift and sporadic movements needed to cast spells.

[monicdzej]

mary oliver, upstream

[monicdzej]

The thing about the philosophy of mathematics is that there's no articulable position so absurd that some influential mathematician hasn't genuinely held to it. You 100% cannot troll these people; you could walk up to a mathematician and say "I'm a radical finitist, I reject the existence of all numbers larger than 1", and not only would that turn out to be a real thing, some maniac has worked out how to construct set theory under its constraints.

[monicdzej]

this is the saddest fucking thing. wheres that post about when you cant even write a poem about it because its just there already

[monicdzej]

[monicdzej]

the worst part about having an embarrassing amount of knowledge about your hyperfixation is having to repress the urge to correct people when they talk about it bc u don't want to be an asshole but at the same time u Need to Share and Protect the Knowledge for the Good of All Mankind

[monicdzej]

i have a question: why do you keep sabotaging yourself? why is it that as soon as you think something is just out of your reach you do everything you can to get in your own way? why is it that as soon as things seem to be going right, you plant your feet and sit on the ground with your legs crossed?

you're not fucking lucky. you worked for it, you sweated, and you cried, and you sacrificed so much to reach the level of knowledge and skill you have now.

have you worked so hard only to say "how lucky"? no, damn it, i won't let you. you may not be a genius, you may not be the best in the world, but do you fucking think anyone could do what you did? do you think anyone could get to where you are? do you believe that anyone has the possibilities that you have?

put this in your head, you are not unexpressed potential, you are exceptional and with your hard work you can achieve unimaginable things. stop wasting your dreams just because they seem too big for the drawer.

edit : in italian we say "dream in the drawer" when we refer to a hope that is unlikely to come true, but not impossible.

ex. my dream in the drawer is to become a famous singer all over the world

(just in case you didn't understand the last sentence)

[monicdzej]

gap in literature where are u

[monicdzej]

You cannot live alone on the fantasies you feed to your mind, eventually you have to touch your life for real, assess and analyze your habits, understand your character, try not to hate yourself for your character as it was shaped when you were very young by circumstances outside of you, and begin learning how to cope with your character, how to build habits that work for you, finish small projects, finish big projects, expose yourself to more uncomfortable situations, assess why you want to leave that friendship before you leave it, raise your anxiety levels on purpose, so that you can grow, raise your work load on purpose, so that you can grow, so that you can build resilience, so that your life expands, and can be experienced by you in full and in reality

[monicdzej]

[monicdzej]

[monicdzej]

girl are you solo leveling because your insistence on romanticizing self reliance to the extreme of cutting yourself off from basically any support systemn seems  indicative of a bigger issue with allowing yourself to trust and be vulnerable again after a traumatic experience that perhaps shattered your previous world views and sense of security, leading you to struggle under the lack of identity pillars and perspective in your life as you try to make sense of your new self and others

[monicdzej]

what's funny about this, other than the reimagining of an anecdote that's probably older than me, is that a sizable contingent of people not only believe the objective of machine learning is to create a sentient being capable of suffering and enslave it, but also that the main problem is that this hasn't happened yet