monstersfear

[monstersfear]

[left on the driver seat]

Amigo,

You have all the right cards in your hand now. Play them wisely and with confidence. Tell Teddy you love him and marry him like I know you want to.

Take the big, scary leaps even if they’re more terrifying than death. You’re strong enough.

Dale con ganas. Con todo tu corazón. You’ll regret it if you don’t. Trust me.

Thank you for everything. Thank you for looking past my fangs.

Thank you for being you. (Except maybe shower more)

With love,

Metzli

.

[monstersfear]

famous last words // teddy, emilio, teagan, patricia, macleod, metzli, & cass

TIMING: just before midnight PARTIES: @deathisanartmetzli @eldritchaccident @yourlocalbrawler @teaganmyrick @monstersfear @braindeacl @stolensiren SUMMARY: metzli, macleod, cass, patricia, teagan, teddy, and emilio all prepare to leave town together, but are stalled by the realization that something isn't right. metzli finds a solution, and everyone wishes there were a different one. CONTENT: sibling death, parental death

“It–it didn’t work.” The earth continued to rumble and crack, the lightning of concrete and dirt growing with each thundering pulse of energy from White Crest. Metzli stood there, watching helplessly, unable to coordinate another plan as everyone stood behind them. Cass, Teddy, Emilio, Teagan, Patricia, and Eilidh agreed to ensure the plan worked, to stay just outside the town’s boundaries in case they needed to step in or keep running. 

And it was so funny, wasn’t it? Decades of being a strategist, with backup plan after backup plan, and now, when the world was ending—arguably the most important moment in Metzli’s life—they were coming up with nothing. “It was supposed to work! I don’t understand! Twelve sacrifices for each hour. All the books—Leah said—fuck! Fuck!” Abigail and Lil, and all those people had given their lives, believing they were doing the right thing. The very thought made Metzli sink to their knees, their heart aching and wishing for some other way. “All those volunteers…it was supposed to—”

Then, it hit them.

“The thirteenth hour.” Metzli practically whispered to themself, rising to their feet and stumbling as dry earth burst open. The sinkhole was going to reach the city limit if they didn’t act fast. If Metzli didn’t do something. “We forgot about the thirteenth hour. Teagan–you were in it.” She nodded with her brows furrowing together, as if she knew where they were going with their thought. She did. She looked down at Eilidh with a somber expression, not saying a word as Metzli continued. “You and that Sol guy, right? If it exists, it has to be the missing part. We need…” Their eyes fell at the realization they knew no one would want to say aloud. Avoiding everyone’s faces, Metzli continued, preparing for the inevitable rebuttals. Especially on Eilidh’s part. Maybe even more especially on Cass’s. “There has to be one more…sacrifice.” The final word hung heavy in the air, and Metzli didn’t lift their head. Doing so would make them think twice, and there just wasn’t enough time for that.

Eilidh was the first to surge forward, putting together what her partner was really saying. Her nails dug impossibly deep into their skin, drawing blood, and Metzli could’ve sworn they felt them in their heart. The two of them were supposed to have a new start, and they were effectively telling her they never would. Her screams filled their ears, her pleas making it nearly impossible to submit themself to what they needed to do. Whispering sweet nothings in her ears, she clung to them, and they finally rose their head to acknowledge everyone they loved, tears streaming down their fearful expression.

Rhett was dead. The ground was shaking, the world was ending, Rhett was dead, and it felt so much like Etla that Emilio could see Jaime’s body in the street just a few feet away staring at him with unseeing eyes. Nausea tugged at his gut, and it took everything he had just to keep his goddamn lunch down, just to keep himself standing on his own two feet. 

And the worst part, he thought, was that it was all for nothing. Rhett stayed behind to play the fucking hero, did the exact goddamn thing he’d forbidden Emilio from doing, and it was all for nothing. Emilio lost the only brother he had left for nothing. The world was still ending. They were still going to die. It might have felt like a relief if he weren’t so goddamn angry about it.

Metzli was speaking then, and it took a moment for Emilio to tune back in to the conversation, took a moment for him to pull himself back into the present and away from the bodies in the street that had rotted away to dust in another country years ago, but when his mind caught up, he understood what they were saying. 

Twelve people stayed behind. And there should have been one more.

Immediately, Emilio stepped forward. He locked eyes with Metzli, tilting his head in a silent question. He’d do it, if he had to. He’d be breaking a million promises — to Rhett, to Teddy, to people no longer around to care, but fuck, it’d be worth it. He chose to live. He chose that. Maybe it didn’t matter if he didn’t stick to it. Maybe choosing it once was enough.

The ground trembled beneath her feet, and Cass stumbled in a wild attempt to stay upright. It should have stopped by now, shouldn’t it? All those people who’d stayed behind, all those people who’d given everything to stop it… It should be over by now. The fact that it wasn’t was bound to be a bad sign, and maybe — maybe they all should have known better. Maybe they should have realized that things couldn’t be this simple. 

Maybe some things weren’t meant to work out.

Cass’s heart was in her throat, because she didn’t want to die. She didn’t want to fall into a hole in the world where no one would ever find her, didn’t want her life to end when it felt like it had really only just begun. Superheroes died for their causes, sometimes, but in the comics, they always came back after. Death wasn’t so temporary in reality. 

But then, Metzli came to a realization that was almost worse, somehow. They spoke, and Cass felt her stomach clench because she knew exactly what they were saying. She stepped towards them a moment after the hunter holding Teddy’s hand did, eyes sliding nervously to the man as she shuffled a little farther away from him and locked her gaze onto Metzli’s. 

“No,” she said firmly, shaking her head. “Metzli, no. You — You said we were going to leave together. You promised that. Let someone else do it.” She didn’t mean to glance back to the hunter as she said it, but maybe she did anyway. “You get to live now. You get that. Please, Metzli.”

The crumbling canyon before them was a ripping, yawning, hollow thing. Bleakly mirroring the expressions on those who stood around the edge. Teddy heard, yes. Teddy processed the meaning moments after the words came from Metzli’s mouth. His grip on Emilio’s hand and stubborn feet maybe the only thing keeping the hunter from rushing in without even knowing what he was going to even do about it. Teddy was doing it again. Flushed cheeks on a paling face. Slowly becoming about as ghost white as the crackles of energy that seeped up and out of the ground before them. Stuck in his spot. Unable to move. But if it wasn’t fear that was keeping him rooted, what was it? Despair? Rage? 

The florist (Well, was it even fair to call him a florist anymore? Twice now his shops had been swallowed completely by something all consuming and unstoppable. At least this time they weren’t alone. Though that thought was far more bitter than it should have been.) echoed the younger girl’s words. “No.” Firm, hurt, but lined with a breathy desperation that threatened to tumble outward should he say anything else. He finally forced himself to look over. Too much distance and too many people he loved stood between him and his appa. Fuck. Teddy was just getting used to that. To family. Each face painted a different portrait of grief. Emilio’s loss of another brother, Cass and the home she’d finally built for herself, Eilidh and the life they were about to create. And Metzli. Something determined and sad behind those eyes. A hungry thing Teddy recognized immediately as resolution. 

“There’s gotta– anyone else. Please. There’s so many people out there who could– anyone else.” It was pretty clear. The people there were among the few Teddy Jones would do literally anything for. Except allow them to die. Except allow them to be the final sacrifice in a pyrrhic victory against the town that raised Ted. The town that was set to raze the rest of the planet if someone didn’t intervene. There had to be another way. Anything. Anything would be better than losing a single one of them. 

— 

Despite the ravenous trembling of the ground beneath her, Patricia’s feet remained planted, looking on at the city that had attempted to make a massacre of its own population. It took her a bit longer than it should’ve to realize what Metzli was implying, what grim resolution to the problem they’d come up with, but it still hurt all the same. They were a close friend, one of the closest besides Teagan, and somebody she thought would become a parent-in-law someday in the future, but like all things, that innocent thought was cut short. Life was unfair, and cruel, but those words were understatements for the irony of Metzli sacrificing themself after already having given so much to the town and its people. 

A stunned silence washed over Patricia, the torrent of thoughts in her mind serving to silence the group’s pleading and denial. When she thought of putting herself in their shoes, she knew she couldn’t do it. There was no way she would leave Teagan and Daisy to give her life for the rest of the world. She knew just how selfish that was, but she didn’t allow self-pity to derail her thoughts. If anyone could do this, it was Metzli, that’s just the kind of person they were. They’d give their all until the last drop of blood was spilled.

Rather than a sob or a cry escaping Patricia’s lips as a tear streamed down her cheek, a grim chuckle instead left in its place. The feeling of disbelief fused with the sudden realization that it had to be Metzli, into a feeling of amusement at the irony of the situation. What else was there to do when all others wept for their closest friend? “Always gotta be the damn hero, don’t you Metz? If you’re going to go out, might as well go out swinging.” The world in front of them was emptying out, crumbling into nothing before their very eyes, but with a single realization Metzli proved that they were willing to charge forth into the void with a final defiant gesture. “Make it count, because there won’t be a single person who survives this that won’t miss you every damn day.”

There wasn’t much else to say. The group of people surrounding Teagan had every reason to refute what Metzli was saying, but even with how horrible the answer was, it was the answer. However, she did find herself wanting to fight back with the rest. If not to preserve a kind heart’s beat, then for her mother figure, Macleod. The love of her life was giving everything away, tossing out any possibility of the happy ever after she felt her mother deserved. But then, the love of her life spoke up, speaking in a way that would most certainly get her chastised. 

“C-cariad.” Teagan pulled Patricia closer to retreat to the back of the group, her voice still cracking from her time in The Ring’s basement. Her neck still bore the evidence of the horrible conditions she was under, and she was still weak from her time away from Dark Score, but there was an undeniable strength in the way she managed to get Patricia where she wanted. “They might h-hit you. Wanted to protect you.” She whispered hoarsely, confident that Patricia would still hear. “May be best to k-keep quiet for now. People in mourning. Denial.” Teagan looked at Cass then, the biggest and most frequent offender of denial. She did it best, and Teagan has experienced first-hand more than once. 

Everyone spoke together, refusing to accept the solution in front of them, just as expected. Metzli’s face contorted into a mixture of grief, frustration, and fear, the knowledge that they were wasting time heavy on their entire body. “Guys—please, can we just—” Then, Patricia, of all people, was tearfully chuckling, and they couldn’t help but scoff in kind. She not only understood what they were saying, but accepted it. There was no way they’d let Emilio give his life, and there was no changing Metzli’s mind, and she knew it. 

“No, guys. No.” Metzli propped Eilidh an arm-length away by her shoulder, hoping to help her see that their solution was the correct one. She continued to argue, to kiss them and beg them to let someone else do it, but Metzli simply shook their head. It wasn’t easy on their part, by any means, though it may have looked like it was. They had coordinated so many plans, were looking forward to a life full of love and adventure, and now…there was no chance. All of that was being given up so that everyone they loved could have that instead. It would hurt, it would ache indefinitely. But to Metzli, that fate was far better than having nothing at all.

Looking to the rest of the group, Metzli could see a tsunami of emotions crashing together, further increasing the difficulty of their decision. Eventually though, they found their resolve. “Emilio, you’re not giving your life. You haven’t lived long enough to make that decision so easily. Teddy and Cass, I know this is hard. I know. But who else will it be? Who else has had their chance at life? I’ve lived over a hundred and fifty years. I promised, I know. And you know what?” They chuckled in disbelief, shaking their head. “I did. I worked so hard to get out of here with you all. I kept my promise, and now I’ve gotta make good on my promise to love and protect you.”

“Metzli…” Emilio’s voice was low, quiet. He wanted to argue that they had more to live for than he did, but Teddy’s grip on his hand reminded him that that wasn’t quite true. And there was something unspeakably cruel about that, wasn’t there? The last time Emilio had run from a town as it came to an end, he’d had nothing left to live for and nothing to chase him down and put him out of his misery. This time, he had so much left to do and the world demanding someone stay to pay the toll anyway. Two years ago, this decision would have been a simple one. But now? Now, it was harder than it should have been. Now, it wasn’t him who was making it. 

He glanced over at Teddy, the stricken look on his face. He was going to lose something here today, no matter who made this sacrifice. And Emilio hated that. He hated that these were the kinds of choices they were given, hated that this was their lot in life, hated that Metzli was volunteering for this now, just when they were starting to make peace with each other, hated that he knew he was going to let them. 

“It doesn’t have to be you,” he said, still low. It was a pointless gesture, both the quiet tones when just about everyone in their group had some kind of enhanced hearing and the offer that Metzli had already turned down once. “Already made it longer than anybody thought I would, you know. Wouldn’t hate it if it ended like this.” They were going to say no — he knew they were going to say no — but Emilio still felt the need to offer. They deserved that much. He got that now.

Frustration built up in Cass throughout it all, through Teddy’s voice echoing her pleas and Patricia’s teary chuckle and Teagan’s sidelong glance in her direction. They were supposed to all get out. They were supposed to all be safe. She was supposed to meet up with Sloane after, they were supposed to all get away together, and it wasn’t —

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. It wasn’t supposed to end like this. They weren’t supposed to be faced with more impossible choices when the decisions had all already been made. Cass had already lost friends to this crumbling mess of a town, had already lost people before the chaos started thanks in part to the strange ‘warning signs’ the town threw out as it started the too-slow, too-fast process of dying. She wasn’t supposed to lose anyone else. She wasn’t supposed to have to leave her family behind. 

Teddy’s boyfriend made an offer, and it took everything Cass had not to beg Metzli to take it, not to say outright that it would be better if they left someone she didn’t care about behind than it would be to leave someone she loved. It was a selfish thing to feel, but she felt it so entirely that it threatened to swallow her whole before the crumbling town could. Growing up the way she had, first in the system and then on the streets, made it so easy to accept that terrible things were bound to happen and to prefer it when they were happening to people you didn’t know. It also made it harder, somehow, when they were happening to the people you loved. There were so few of them. Cass couldn’t afford to lose any more.

“I don’t want that,” she insisted, her voice breaking. “We don’t want that.” She gestured between herself and Teddy, speaking for him without permission because she knew she was right. For all that she’d resented him, she knew that Teddy grew up much in the same way she had. She knew that, like her, he would prefer it if strangers took the fall in place of friends. Teddy didn’t want anyone to die for him any more than Cass did. She was confident in that, at least. “Let it be someone else, Metzli, please. I — I don’t want to lose you. I can’t. You’re my family, the first family I ever had. Please don’t leave me here alone.” 

— 

There wasn't anything Teddy could say that Cass hadn't already. Though her glances towards Emilio hadn't gone completely unnoticed. It wasn't her fault she never had a chance to really meet him and get to know the side Ted had come to love. But that didn't really stop the sting and feeling of betrayal at the silent suggestion. His heart was pounding. If he had not spent the majority of the last few months learning how to control his shifting, he might have sported a much more toothsome look by now. Instead he looked much like a dog someone left out in the rain. Tearing his eyes between the one who had volunteered themselves, and the man who tried to take their place. Neither would be acceptable. How could they be? Teddy's life had been empty, so fucking empty until these beautiful lights filled it with meaning and worth. He gripped even tighter on Emilio's hand. Maybe even painfully, but not on an intentional scale. He'd probably have done the same to Metzli if he already had a hold on them. 

"You– you can't leave us." He repeated numbly, barely audible. "I said I'd go wherever you go, appa. You promised we'd be together." In lieu of a well thought out argument, Teddy began to mumble like a lost toddler. Felt the burn in his legs as he willed them to move but they stayed firmly in place. His stomach churned, and his chest rose and shuddered with his ragged breath. "Why-why-why would it even have to be you? Huh?" He stammered, a rising defensive rage bubbling up out of the demon. "Haven't you given enough? You deserve to make it out with all of us just as much as anyone else, more even. You fought for this appa, you have to come with us s-someone else out there has to-" The tears his wide stare had been holding back finally burst through the dam. Catching his voice behind a curtain of hyperventilation and choked sobs as the realization that there was no way that he was leaving here with his heart intact. 

—

Patricia couldn’t think of anything witty or insightful to add to this devastating moment of collective revelation. All she could do was wrap an arm around Teagan, and watch as each member of this group reacted in their own ways. Even if all of them were normal people, intertwined only by common interests and memories, this would still hurt like shit, but they weren’t just that. Everybody here had been affected by Metzli for the better, time and time again. How could anybody ever accept that a world of people they’d never met, of people that would mostly never know them or care about them, should be more important than the one person who was good without expectation? It was a herculean task, and it couldn’t be resolved in the mere minutes that remained before the world ended.

Only an immensely small percentage of the world would know just what had been sacrificed for them, and even less would get to know who was lost for them. It was a devastatingly lonely fate that Patricia wouldn’t wish on nobody, not even those that had taken Teagan from her. There was no point consoling others right now, because not even Patricia could keep it together to do so. There was no staying strong, not anymore. Thoughts were quickly becoming harder to grasp as the knot in her throat felt larger and larger. Patricia leaned over and buried her face in Teagan’s shoulder, quickly dampening the fabric of her shirt with a stream of the tears just as inevitable as the shudder of the earth beneath them.

Teagan’s whole demeanor softened at the emotional outpour around her. She found herself wanting to fight back too, but there was a look in the vampire’s eye that told her everything she needed to know. They were a parent, a lover, a friend, a sibling, and everything in between. Soon, they would be none of those things except in the fleeting memories of everyone surrounding them. Macleod would mourn for the rest of her days, and as Teagan looked back over to her whilst she held Patricia, she held back a sob. The people she loved were always so strong and never let their tears see the light of day. Each a cache of emotions they held tightly shut. Holding tempers that could be akin to a blazing fire. But there they were, extinguishing the flames themselves so as to not leave anything unsaid.

“Shh…” She cooed, bringing Patricia closer. What else could she say? Teagan led the pair to the ground to get a better hold, a better look at the damage Metzli’s decision was making. It was then that she realized just how good of a friend they were to Patricia. She should’ve known. They had played a willing part in her rescue mission, after all. Teagan then cried, too. She held them at arm’s length so she didn’t have to feel the love they so obviously wanted to give, and did anyway, even without her permission. “I’m sorry,” Teagan whispered, looking at Metzli. “I should’ve gotten to know you better.” They shook their head at her, proclaiming her words nonsense and that they wouldn’t change a thing. Sometimes a quiet love is the one that echoes the farthest. Nodding in understanding, Teagan placed a kiss on Patricia’s head and intertwined her fingers with Macleod’s, extending her strength and love to her.

“Come on man,” Metzli shook their head and faced the wreckage that White Crest was becoming. “You’re not getting out of living that easy. You’ve got shit to do. Besides…” Shrugging, they turned to Cass and Teddy for a moment, going back to Emilio to finish their thought. “You need to make sure everyone stays together and gets out. No one else knows how important that is more than you.” 

Metzli again turned around, this time facing Eilidh. If it wasn’t ghosts or ghouls, it was the intimate celebrations that brought back the dead, or better yet, kept them alive. Metzli had done just that only weeks ago when they put together a Día de Muertos party. Eilidh did that daily when she saw a butterfly and said hello to her first love. They wondered, for a moment, if she’d do the same when she found a blooming datura. At the thought, Metzli stared into her eyes with a softness that could compete with silk. Their hand grazed the necklace they’d given her and they swallowed a sob so they could replace it with a longing kiss. “I’m so glad you’re the first and only woman I’ve ever loved.” They muttered against her lips, stepping away slowly while holding her hand with a pressure she could feel. Raising it just as slow and biting hard enough to draw her black, clotted blood. She scoffed out a teary chuckle and roughly pulled them to her for another firm kiss. A proper one that ended with their blood in her mouth. “I love you,” They said in unison, in each other’s languages they learned for one another.

Finally, they faced Teddy and Cass, only cupping her cheek. They would’ve cupped Teddy’s too, but sadly, one needs two hands for that, and he was on their left. “Listen guys, I’m not leaving you because I want to. I made a promise to protect you. To love you so unconditionally that I would quite literally put my life on the line for you. Of course you don’t want this, hell, I don’t want this, but it’s the solution we’ve got.” Metzli tightened their eyes shut in a vain attempt to halt the tears that fell anyway, and slowly, they brought Cass and Teddy into the tightest hug. Tight enough to imprint their bodies onto their skin so they’d stay there forever and they never had to forget how beautiful it felt to have love wrap around them. “It’s not about deserve. That went out the window a long time ago. It’s just about love. That’s all this is, and if you remember that, I’ll never leave you. You’ll never be alone. Look around you.” They parted from the hug and gestured to the people that had banded together to leave. “We made a family, Cass. We started it. And then it got bigger.” Teary eyes met with Teddy’s. “So no, you two will never be alone, and you know, you know, I will find a way back. This isn’t the end. It never is in our world. I chose you from the get-go. I chose you when I said we should leave. I’m choosing you now.” With a pause, they let go and stood tall, looking at their car. “We don’t have a lot of time and I need to get something done. Can I do that?”

Teddy’s grip on his hand was almost painful, tight and certain in a way that told the slayer just what the florist thought of his offer. It wouldn’t have mattered, anyway. Metzli had that bound and determined look in their eye, the one that told Emilio that their mind was made up. For all the ups and downs that their strange almost-friendship had been through throughout his year in White Crest, he could certainly recognize that that look meant there was no arguing with the vampire. 

Glancing to the rest of the group — to Teddy’s stricken expression, to the heartbroken kid, to Teagan and Patricia on the ground and Macleod murmuring in the language she and Metzli shared — Emilio nodded. “I’ll make sure they get out,” he promised. Metzli was right; out of all of them, Emilio knew best just how important that was. He could save people, this time. It didn’t make up for the ones he couldn’t save before, didn’t undo the shit he’d done, but it was something. It had to be something.

Cass, of course, was far less understanding. She wanted an easier answer, wanted a better ending to this story. She wanted the kind of thing that only ever existed in fairytales, where the people she loved were fine and everyone lived happily ever after. Never mind that that was already out the window now, never mind that people had already died for this town, never mind that it would all be for nothing if one more didn’t join them. All Cass wanted was to get out of here with what was left of her family intact. That was all. 

And this world couldn’t even give her that. 

Her tears soaked Metzli’s hand as it rested against her face, and she shook her head adamantly. “It isn’t fair.” After everything they’d been through, after all the work they’d put into regaining their soul, how was this how it ended? How was it okay that they were going to die when they’d only just started to live? The two of them had just celebrated Metzli’s birthday, the first time they’d been allowed to do so. It was supposed to be the first of many, was supposed to be the beginning of a new tradition. They were supposed to have decades of movie nights and stupid dinner parties, were supposed to be there for each other until Cass was old and gray. Cass was supposed to have her sibling with her until the day she died. 

They should have had sixty more years of laughter and joy and peace. It wasn’t supposed to end in a crumbling town, with tears and dust. It wasn’t supposed to end abruptly and without warning, the way every other attempt at a family Cass had ever made had. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

But there was no other way it could be, either. 

Metzli wouldn’t let anyone else make this decision in their place, not even if they were volunteering for it. No matter what they thought of themself, they were good. Too good to let anyone else do this in their stead, no matter how much Cass might long for it. Maybe it was always going to end like this after all. Maybe, since the beginning, Metzli doing something this selfless and this wonderful and this heartbreaking was inevitable. Maybe good people didn’t get happy endings. 

She whimpered as Metzli spoke, a thousand arguments building up in the back of her mind. But you won’t, she wanted to scream. You won’t be here. You won’t be here, and the town is gone and Levi is going to go back into the sea and Teddy probably doesn’t like me much, anyway, and I can’t go back to being alone when I’ve only just started to be with other people. This can’t be all the time we get. This can’t be all the family I get to have. It was stupid and selfish and childish, but she wanted to stomp her feet and throw her hands up and scream at the sky, wanted to yell at a god she wasn’t even sure she’d ever believed in for making this the hand they were dealt. It isn’t fair. I need you here. I still need you here. 

But what good would it do? What good would throwing a fit at the end of the world do for any of them? It would only make Metzli feel worse than they already did and, god, Cass didn’t want their last impression of her to be that. She didn’t want Metzli to feel anything negative towards her at the end, didn’t want to be the inconvenience every one of her short-lived foster families had accused her of being. There was so much here that she didn’t want, and so little time to correct any of it. 

There was still too much to say, still too much to do. And the world was still ending. And not one bit of it was fair.

She reached out, clutching Metzli’s hand desperately. “I’m not — I’m not ready,” she said, voice caught somewhere between a whisper and a sob. “I’m not ready to be without you. We just started. This is supposed to be the beginning.” 

The messy mix of memories that had firmly rooted Teddy in place began to settle into the corners of his mind, letting him slip into an unkind and uncomfortable sense of morbid pain. He had stopped flicking his gaze between Metzli and Emilio at some point, maybe when the older of the two guided the younger to keep everyone else safe. A firm decision that didn't seem up for debate. No, instead his eyes fell on Cass. Watched every bit of the churning ocean of emotions washed over her features in a way his inability to process the very same ones wouldn't allow. He watched until they were both pulled into a hug so tight his view was obscured, and he could only feel the flushed heat radiating off her skin. Hear her heartbeat banging against its cage in rhythm with his own. 

Her words compelled him to do something he never really would have thought of, if not for how Metzli brought them closer together. Funnily enough, their connection to Levi and Marina made them something of siblings, but it might just have been the old vampire who made them family. Teddy gently, far more gently than he had been (and still was) gripping tight to his boyfriend, slipped his hand into Cass's. A wordless promise that if she wanted it, if she allowed it…he would be there for her. They both knew so intimately what it was like to be alone. Maybe it was time they tried to get rid of that feeling together. 

Teddy wasn't ready to lose Metzli either. The annoying gnawing voice that always grated at the back of his head reminded him that they hadn't even really known each other that long. That the strange sensation of knowing the vampire all his life had come from a stint of magic that temporarily altered his memories and gave him and Metzli a few days where he got to be a real kid. Their kid. And now… now he was going to be an orphan again. It didn't really matter how old you were, losing that part of yourself… especially after having fought so long to feel it. To really belong to something or someone who chose you because of who you are, not something you did or something you could give. He wasn't ready to lose it all again. It didn't matter what he had with Levi. A thousand years and that would never be this. 

A loving embrace, before a calculated release. 

A selfless sacrifice that would leave a living scar on everyone here. Teddy wept. Silent and steady. Hot blistery tears streaking down his cheeks with no sign of stopping. His breath stifled any words, as if he could think of any. What the hell was he supposed to say? How do you tell someone that they've become such an ingrained part of you that to pull them away means the very fabric of you begins to unravel? How do you keep standing when the ground below gets ripped away? The closest he could think of was a sobbed, repeated phrase. Over and over. 

"Apa, please. I love you."

—

All Teagan could do was watch with eyes so full of mist that everyone was a blur. Looking down at Patricia, it was all she could do to keep herself from falling apart when there were parties clearly more affected than she was. For the time being, she kept quiet, wiping her eyes to see Metzli hurry around the vehicles as the world crumbled around them. Time was ticking, and Teagan could’ve sworn she could hear the clock bell roar, confirming Metzli’s suspicions. 

Why did it have to end this way? Life always had a cost, and it looked like there was nothing left to do but pay, and Metzli was holding the lump sum. One so large that it was lodged in their throat while they said their goodbyes, even taking the time to speak to those they barely knew. Teagan appreciated that, looking at Macleod with eyes so full of sorrow, they were dripping down her cheeks. Everything was breaking, and the nix didn’t wield the power to make everything come to a full stop when the collection of all their fears was titanic. But that strange, one-armed vampire did. And they knew it. 

“I’m not ready either,” Metzli whispered with a tired smile, pulling Cass into one more tight hug after spending a few minutes rushing to transfer items to the other vehicles and writing letters as fast as they could. They figured their belongings would be better off kept by those they loved than lost beneath the rubble of a lost town, and their family would pass on their goodbyes to everyone they knew. Of that they were sure of. 

“And Teddy,” Metzli locked eyes with the one and only son they ever had, wrapping their arms around him and giving into their heart that they opened up so anxiously to the world. “ I love you. I love all of you.” That time, they looked around them, taking the time to share a glance at everyone, disregarding the way their backwards world could they offer their dying breaths and it be called beautiful. 

Emilio, the man that hated them without a second thought became one of their greatest allies, and even better friend. 

Patricia, a woman who so lost in her failure that she nearly lost sight of what she could have. Now she had everything, and the best was yet to come. 

Teagan, a girl who kept everyone at arm’s length, was now using those very limbs to encase people with love. 

Cass, once a stranger that prevented them from being their own worst enemy. She shared Metzli’s  fear of loneliness and abandonment so intimately that she became tightly entangled in their heart and made a family. Their first. 

Teddy, a boy who was never chosen despite holding the biggest heart made of gold that persevered through loneliness, and now, finally, he knew what unconditional love from a parent was. 

Eilidh, the first and only woman Metzli ever loved. With her heart as full and lively as every garden she tended, she gave the vampire everything, even if it was to her detriment. She found their heart, but she’d always be their soul. Their death so early on in their relationship was not the ending they wanted, but they handed her the seeds for the future and were giving her a watering can to nurture something into bloom. Each petal would be marked with their love and she would be reminded every day that they would never leave her. With their sacrifice, with their love, they were painting the future in the background with only 30 minutes left. 

And yes, they would all grieve. But Metzli found comfort that their deep grief meant that they loved fully. They all opened their hearts despite the inevitable. Metzli had many regrets, but never would they regret the love they gave, or anything they did in the name of it. 

With one final round of hugs and a lingering kiss for Eilidh, the ending was cemented. Each rumble and shake grew in strength, leading a flurry of tremors to course through Metzli as their legs settled in the driver side. “Please, take care of each other. Please.” They faced everyone, rolling the window down and shutting the door with their face tear-stained and red. “And Cass?” They chuckled dryly, a glimmer of humor pushing through with a twitchy, quick nod. “Tell amá I love her, okay? And check Macleod’s glove compartment in her trailer. There’s a little present there for you.”

It wouldn’t have mattered if the quakes hadn’t been trembling through the ground, wouldn’t have mattered if the sun was high in the sky or the clouds were all far away. In that moment, no matter what the world actually looked like, all Cass would have seen was darkness. The scene blurred around her as her eyes filled up with tears, and she shook her head again, adamant. It couldn’t end like this. After everything, it couldn’t end like this. They’d made it out. They’d gotten all the way to the edge of town, had plans to go farther, had a future all mapped out and ready to go. They were all supposed to survive this. They were all supposed to be okay.

But the world, Cass had learned long ago, never gave much of a shit about the way things were supposed to be. It didn’t matter that Metzli was going off to stop the apocalypse, didn’t matter that a dozen other people were giving their lives for the same reason. The world was ending anyway. It already had.

Cass clung to Metzli stubbornly as they hugged her, and she wanted to drag the vampire with them, wanted to say fuck the world, let it end, I don’t care even if it wasn’t true. She was too kindhearted to doom the world, even if hers would be so much emptier without Metzli in it. Even if it felt like the apocalypse might as well have been successful in this moment.

She sniffled as Metzli spoke again, nodding her head even as her throat burned, even as her chest ached. Whatever present Metzli had left for her would be far too small to fill the void carved out in her life, but at least she’d have something to hold onto. At least she’d have something tangible to remind her that once, for a moment, someone had loved her like this. 

Too soon, the goodbyes were over. There wasn’t enough time in the world to say everything they wanted to say, and there certainly wasn’t enough time now. Metzli had to go, and so did the rest of them. Someone tugged her back towards the cars, Teddy’s boyfriend practically dragging him along, and everything hurt long after Cass was settled into the seat with a seatbelt holding her in place, long after Metzli disappeared in the rear view mirror. 

There was a future ahead of them, still. There was a windshield with a whole world contained behind it, a world that would continue to exist because of an infuriatingly selfless vampire who left to save the planet because it needed them to. And Cass had needed them, too. She understood it — of course she did — but she didn’t think the ache would ever really go away. Maybe, if she could ever look to the future in the windshield instead of the crumbling past in the mirror, it would hurt less. Or maybe it never would. Either way, she figured, they had to keep driving. For Metzli. For all of them.

[monstersfear]

@lostlovings

[ pm ] You’re not saying goodbye. That’s all you had to say. If you’re staying in my life I’m staying in yours. Too many lost today. I love you too much to let things get lost like this.

Greece. Ay Milio. You in Greece would be lindo. Te mereces. You deserve it. But yes. Texas. Please. Please come visit. We’ll write. We will. Don’t disappear. Not again.

[pm] Yeah. Yeah, don't think I could stand to lose much else.

I'll see you soon, Vida. That's a promise.

[monstersfear]

the end of something // rhett, teddy, & emilio

TIMING: sometime before midnight. PARTIES: @eldritchaccident @ironcladrhett & @monstersfear SUMMARY: teddy and emilio prepare to leave town, and rhett informs them that he won't be joining them. CONTENT: sibling death, mentions of past suicide ideation

“Metzli’s going to meet us at the edge of town,” Emilio announced, slipping his phone into his pocket with a grimace. “They’ve got some kind of a caravan set up. Figure it’s safer to travel in groups.” Not to mention he knew Teddy would want reassurance that Metzli made it out. The hunter might not admit it, but he wouldn’t mind that reassurance himself. He’d made a list in the back of his mind, had people he was keeping track of throughout this whole evacuation process. Ari, Kaden, Metzli, Nicole, Vida. 

Next to him now were two people near the top of said list. There was some relief in having both Teddy and Rhett where he could see them, some quiet factor that made it a little easier to breathe. Emilio might not be as self aware as some people might want him to be, but he knew he had… issues here. A town falling apart, everyone he loved inside of it… It was a painfully familiar scenario. Last time this happened, he’d walked away with nothing. He’d saved no one. He wasn’t going to let that happen again.

“We should move fast. This shit’s going under quick, and we can’t be here when it does.” He motioned for the other two men to follow him quickly, eyes darting around to take in the darkened sky and crumbling town.

—

Packing had been finished for a good few weeks at this point. Teddy didn't know the day or the hour of the fucking apocalypse so they had to be prepared. Besides, it wasn't like either himself or Emilio were terribly unfamiliar with living out of boxes or bags. Most of the bigger shit was in a storage container a few towns away, they had a carry on sized bag each to hold them over in the interim. 

The biggest trouble the florist had been dealing with was keeping track of Zazzy. The normally quite lazy couch potato of a raiju runt had gotten more and more agitated and energetic as the end approached. In a way it was nice. Gave them about as much of a heads-up as they were going to get. But now that it was time Teddy was struggling to keep the wormy zoomie little fuzzball in his arms. Suddenly wishing he had got the little guy a carrier crate but he kinda figured that the raiju wouldn't like that very much. Oops. 

Maybe it was nice though. To have something to focus on that took quite a bit of strain to do so. Had his mind had moments to wander, surely Teddy would've gotten stuck in a loop of worry and stomach churning anxiety. As it was. He could hardly take his eyes off the cat/dog/weasel thing. Any chances he had were all spent on Emilio. Convinced that his man was going to go off and do some last minute heroics that was going to get him killed one way or another. One arm to hold Zazz, one hand to continuously anchor himself to the hunter. 

Rhett had just pulled in and popped up to the apartment too, he probably had the easiest job of packing between all of them. Perks of living mobily, Teddy supposed. He was about to make a comment to that end when Emilio spoke up, and confirmed what he'd been thinking. They were together now. Time to get out. And make sure everyone they cared about followed suit. 

—

As they exited the building, Rhett’s gaze followed a similar path to Emilio’s, scanning over the fucked up sky while his resolve hardened. This couldn’t be allowed to spread. The boys, Ari, Vida… all of them had to get out and be safe. Wasn’t any point in claiming to be a protector if you weren’t ready to lay down your life. That said, there had to be some left. Younger blood, the kind that warmed a heart enough to let it be given to another. That wasn’t on the table for Rhett anymore, but Emilio still had time. Still had hope. Teddy gave him that—Teddy and all the other people his little brother had met in this town. 

Had to protect that.

Bringing up the rear, Rhett placed a hand on Emilio’s shoulder as they all reached the Fungi Wagon, urging him to turn around. “Here,” he muttered, digging the keys from his pocket with one hand and taking Emilio’s in the other, forcing them into his palm. 

When Teddy got the passenger side door open, he’d notice that all the personal junk that used to take up the space in the back had been fully cleared out. In fact, other than the painted mural that still clung to its metal sides, every trace of Rhett had been scrubbed from the vehicle. The man himself looked up to meet Emilio’s gaze, the wilted smile on his lips conveying his hope that he wouldn’t have to say what came next. As practiced as he was with goodbyes, this wasn’t one he’d expected to have to make a second time.

—

Teddy’s hand gripped his tightly, and Emilio understood why. It wasn’t just a passive thing here, wasn’t just a show of affection. Emilio had a bad habit of going to dark places, and no one knew that better than Teddy. It was only a few months ago that the florist had been desperately trying to convince Emilio to keep living, only a few months ago that Rhett had dragged him away from his desire to stop and done everything he could to keep him separate from it. And Emilio would be lying if he said those feelings were entirely gone. He’d be lying if he said he thought they ever could be, after everything. But right now, he was choosing something else. With Teddy’s hand in his, it felt just a little easier to do.

Rhett’s hand on his shoulder pulled him from his thoughts, and Emilio glanced to his brother with a quizzical expression on his face. He took the keys robotically, brows furrowing together. “Really must be the end of the world if you’re letting me drive,” he joked, huffing a laugh as he slipped the keychain around his finger and flipped the key absently.

But then Rhett met his eye. Then he got that goddamn look on his face, and there was a pit in Emilio’s stomach that was bottomless and gaping, a feeling that hollowed him out so quickly it should have been impossible. The smile slipped off his face, the keys going still in his hand as he stopped swinging them so abruptly that they hit against his knuckles with a quiet clatter. 

“No,” he said, the word little more than a breath of air. “No. Absolutely fucking not, Rhett, I’m not kidding. No.” 

—

With the raiju placed in a ball of blankets in the front seat, content with the warmth from the car to keep it still, Teddy had a moment to breathe. To think. And a moment is all it was, cause from the other side of the van something of a commotion stirred. Somehow between that and all that was missing from the vehicle, the meaning was partially lost on the demon. The florist hurried to the other side though, taking up his spot right next to Emilio once again. There was a heat beginning to radiate from the hunter as he got more and more amped up. 

“Wait–wait– what’s happening?” Social cues weren’t Teddy’s forte, but it was obvious something was wrong. That achey thrum began to worm its way up in his chest. Instinctively he put an arm around the slayer, but his eyes stayed firmly on Rhett. There was a play going on around him and he hadn’t been given the script. It really shouldn’t have been that hard to figure out.  But it was the end of the fucking world and the man had more than a few things on his mind that were perhaps taking up a bit of his cognitive processing. “Rhett– why…what are you planning?” 

—

Of course he argued. Rhett had expected as much, steeling himself against the fear that started creeping into Emilio’s expression. Teddy came ‘round the other side of the van, joining them with a bemused look on his face before asking what was going on. The warden let his gaze flick over to Teddy, needing a moment to be free of the pain he was causing Emilio. 

“Can’t come with,” he answered softly. “Some people here need my help.” With a thick swallow, he glanced back to Emilio. “This is it, kiddo. The big one. Need to make myself useful.”

—

“He’s planning on staying behind,” Emilio spat, because for him, grief always came with anger. Anger towards the situation that left them with an unwinnable battle. Angry at the world for taking and taking and taking until he had nothing left to give. Angry at Rhett for making this choice, for doing a stupid, heroic thing when Emilio desperately needed him to be a coward. Angry at himself for not seeing any of it coming. 

And the anger wasn’t real. He knew that, too. He knew that the anger was a defense mechanism, a fire built in a wasteland to keep him warm. He wasn’t angry at Rhett or at himself or even at the world at large. But admitting that meant admitting to what was lurking underneath. Admitting that meant recognizing how small he felt, how scared. And Emilio couldn’t do that.

So he glared in Rhett’s direction, fire burning behind his eyes to distract from the aching in his chest, and he told himself that that was better. He told himself it was easier this way. “You’re a fucking asshole,” he said, taking a step towards his brother and grabbing him by the front of his shirt, knuckles white with his grip. “You think, what, you make the sacrifice play after months of telling me I’m not allowed to? Some people need your help? I need you, you prick. What about that?” His throat burned, and his vision blurred in a way he pretended was rage instead of tears threatening to spill over. 

“Fuck this. Fuck you. Get in the fucking van, Everett.” Please, he added silently, the word unspoken but present in his expression all the same.

—

"Wh–" Fuck. Now that it'd been said aloud it was so obvious what it all had been pointing to. Teddy shifted uncomfortably, at a total loss of how to respond. "Y-your–?" Leaving. Or staying rather. Staying there in the middle of assured destruction to save the rest of the world. Hunters died to protect others. That's something Emilio had said over and over and over. You don't get old in that line of work. You don't get happily ever afters or even the joy of retiring.  Rhett was the closest thing Teddy had ever seen that seemed to contradict that statement. But now he was– 

He was shaking. Teddy knew that much, but everything seemed so numb outside of his hands it was hard to feel anything else. He gripped tighter and tighter onto Emilio, knowing that this had to have been a thousand times worse for him. Teddy only just got to know the old warden. But that was Emilio's brother. He was supposed to be a fixture in their life. Together. More weird breakfasts and old stories and time. But Rhett had other plans it seemed. 

—

“You’ve got people,” Rhett said sadly. “Y’haven’t needed me for a long time, now. So here’s what’s gonna happen.” Still very much trapped in Emilio’s grip, the warden brought a hand to the side of his neck and braced it there. “You two are gonna get as far away from here as you can, hear me? Real far. Don’t take any fuckin’ chances.” He glanced to Teddy, perhaps as a silent plea to help talk some sense into Emilio, because he knew this would be an uphill battle. “Me? Can’t back out. If I bail, they don’t have enough people.” He paused. “If they don’t have enough people, we all die.” His other hand gave Teddy’s shoulder a squeeze before moving it to now frame Emilio’s pained face between them both.

“Listen t’me, little brother. I’m old. I ain’t got much time left in this world, anyway. We both know that. Let me… let me go out doin’ somethin’ that’ll help everyone, not just… whatever makes me feel better in the moment. Whatever dampens the rage and the hurt… just lemme do this, kid. For you. For Ted. For all the people in this damn town who’d cry at your funeral. Please.”

—

“You’re my people.” His voice broke on the last word, just a little. Emilio hadn’t felt like a child in decades now, hadn’t even really felt like a child when he was a child, but in this moment, he was eight years old again. He was staring in wonder as his mother and uncle dragged their brother into the house and laid him on the kitchen table, flinching as too-loud voices ordered him to sit with the bleeding man while they went to get help, struck with the realization of what help meant when they returned with the priest instead of the doctor. 

Hunters were supposed to have their lives cut off at the knees, were built to die long before their hair went gray and their skin began to wrinkle and Emilio knew that. Emilio had known that all his life, had watched it happen. He’d seen his mother and siblings dead in the street, had watched his nephew die before the kid was old enough to know what dying meant. And somehow, he’d thought Rhett was different. Somehow, he’d convinced himself that the warden was above all that, that Rhett would outlive him and that there’d be relief in, for once, being the one to leave instead of the one to get left. But Rhett’s hand was gripping the side of his neck in a way that meant goodbye now, and it didn’t make sense even though it did. It was impossible even though it wasn’t. Every inch of it ached.

“No,” he said again, because what else was there to say? What else was there to do? “No. I’m not — I’m not going to leave you. I can’t. I can’t do that again.” It was an ugly mirror image of the last moments in Etla; the chaos, the anguish, the grief. People he loved dying while he made it out. Was this how it was always going to be? Was Emilio always the one who survived, no matter how little he wanted to? Maybe this was his punishment, he thought, the retribution for all the sins he’d stacked up under his belt. To lose Rhett in a way that seemed to echo the way he’d lost everyone else was the kind of thing just cruel enough for God to come up with.

Desperately, Emilio looked to Teddy, eyes pleading with his boyfriend to do… something. To drag Rhett into the damn van, kicking and screaming. To make some demon deal that would tie his brother to life instead of allowing him to die. To fix the unfixable, somehow. 

—

Both sets of eyes were on him now and Teddy was just left stammering. Of course he wanted Rhett to stay, of course he wanted to stop whatever the hell was going through the old man's head, let someone else take the torch. But Rhett was looking at him too, pleading him just as much to tell Emilio that this was how it had to be. Teddy didn't know though, how true that was. How could they just agree to let him run into the flames? Even if it meant the rest of the world wouldn't catch fire. 

"Isn't there anything else? There's gotta be uhh–" He swallowed, hard. Feeling the weight of expectations from either side of the growing chasm. "Someone else or…" 

—

Recognizing the spot he’d put Teddy in, Rhett closed his eyes and shook his head. “There’s no talkin’ me out of it, lads. But yes, there is someone else… and they’re waitin’ on me.” He let his hands fall back to his sides, beginning the slow retreat that would eventually end with him turning his back on the pair. “I’m sorry, Emilio. Don’t wanna do this to you, but… couldn’t let someone else go in my stead. Wouldn’t be right. This is my job, and I’ve been doin’ fuck all, lately.” It was because he was suddenly afraid of losing the man again, afraid of abandoning him by dying doing something reckless… which felt silly, now. It went against everything he’d been saying, because more than anything else, he knew he had to throw himself on the knife so that Emilio wouldn’t do it himself. There was something else, too. Something he’d never said aloud, but this seemed like the right moment to give it a shot. 

“I just want you t’be… proud of me.” His voice wavered as he spoke, the instinct to withdraw taking over. “Know I ain’t all here, haven’t been since I was a kid. Know I do a lot of stupid shit. Say stupid things. No kinda role model. Violent, angry, spiteful.” He dragged his gaze up to meet Emilio’s, the tiredness settling over his worn features. “Don’t want you to fall too deep in that hole. Be more like Ted, not like me. Lemme go out doin’ somethin’ a good person would do. Remember me like that, maybe, not… not all the other shit. Maybe.” His voice dropped to a whisper on the final word, head drooping shamefully. 

“... you need to leave.”

—

Teddy was trying, just like Emilio was. But Rhett had always been a stubborn old bastard, for as long as Emilio had known him. Once he’d set his mind to something, it was always damn near impossible to change it. It was one of the many ways the two hunters were alike, one of the many things that had drawn them together since the first day Rhett wandered into Etla. In the past, it had always seemed like a good thing. But in this moment? It was the worst thing in the goddamn world. 

“I am proud of you,” he said, and Christ, Emilio had never been one to beg but this sure as hell sounded like it. He’d faced down torture and unimaginable pain, had gone up against a fucking ancient demon without begging for shit, but he was pleading like a damn kid now. Every inch of his face was pleading desperately for Rhett to change his mind, just this once. He knew a lost cause when he saw one, but he’d never been particularly good at accepting them for what they were. It was almost funny, in a cruel way; he’d lost so much now that, at this point, you’d think he’d be used to it.

He shook his head, breath hitching. “You said I could go first,” he replied stubbornly, and he knew he sounded like a child but he was beyond caring. “You said that. I can’t —” He looked back to Teddy again, shaking his head. “I can’t leave him.”

—

That was just Emilio’s fear talking. Rhett knew it well, and knew that this goodbye wouldn’t end in hugs and tearful smiles. No, this goodbye would be wretched, the most wretched he’d ever created of his own volition, and yet… he had to do it. “I know I did,” the warden muttered, untangling himself from Emilio’s grip and taking a step back. “Turns out I was lyin’. I’m sorry.” It’s all he could do, now. Apologize. He’d said his piece, and Emilio would either accept or reject it, in his own time. He’d hate him for his sacrifice, or he’d go through the stages of grief and see that Rhett was just doing it to protect him. 

“You can leave me, and you will,” the warden argued, his voice low. Another quick glance up at the darkening sky told him that the time was drawing near. Still hours away, but he wanted them to be hours from this place before everything went to shit. “Runnin’ outta time. Not gonna argue ‘bout it anymore. Take the wagon, go join the caravan, n’ get outta here. Go live your lives. And goddamnit, be careful. Don’t make me die for nothin’.”

—

As Rhett pulled away, Emilio’s hands gripped the air in his absence, as if his fingers weren’t quite ready to admit that there was nothing left for them to hold onto. They opened and closed, fist clenching and unclenching absently in the way it always did when he was left with nothing to fight. It was so much harder like this. When the turmoil existed nowhere but inside of him, he didn’t know what to do with it. He didn’t know how to breathe around it. “Don’t,” he said quietly, still pleading. Still angry and still not. “Don’t apologize. Just — Just get in the van. We’ll figure something else out, like Teddy said. Please.” 

But Rhett’s voice was firm, his eyes darting up to the sky and the way it darkened around them. When all this was said and done, would it be a sunny day? Emilio found himself filled with a surge of bitterness at the thought, found himself unreasonably angry towards a sun that would rise tomorrow even if Rhett was no longer around to see it. That was always the hardest part about loss. It wasn’t the moment you lost something — it was the moment after. It was the one after that. 

“Don’t make me do this,” he begged. “Please, Rhett. No me dejen solo.”

—

“You’re not alone,” Rhett answered, nodding at Teddy. “You’ve got a whole caravan waitin’ on you.” And to dispel any remaining hope Emilio or Teddy had of convincing him, he went on to add, “I’m not gettin’ in that van, you know that. We can either say goodbye, or…” His throat felt tight and his breathing was weak, still afraid of that worst-case scenario. “... or I can just walk away. Don’t… really want it to end like that, though.”

—

It was tense, everything ached in a way that felt like they were being sent through a meat grinder but slowly and in reverse. Teddy knew what it was like to not get a goodbye. Knew the empty hollow pain that haunted you forever afterwards. Knew Emilio wouldn't ever come close to forgiving himself if he didn't say something. But he also knew how hard it was for the slayer to express himself. All he could do was hold tight to his hand, but give him a nudge forward. Not quite resigned to the idea of letting this happen, but not wanting to let Emilio give himself another thing to beat himself up about. 

—

There were moments where it felt like the goddamn world was closing in around you. Emilio was no stranger to them, had had more than his fair share. In Etla, in New Orleans, in that cave just outside of town, in his own apartment. There were moments where the world was both too big and too small, where everything was a contradiction that seemed impossible to grapple with. There were moments you could never get out from under, and this was one of them. Emilio would live in this moment for the rest of his life, he knew, would carry it with him in the same overflowing stack where there were bodies rotting on a Mexican street and smoke rising up from a warehouse where no one had died. 

Rhett was right; Emilio knew he wasn’t getting in the van. He’d known it since the beginning, since the moment those keys were pressed into his hands. The ending was already written down. There was no changing it. And he was angry, even if he wasn’t. There was rage burning in his chest, even if it wasn’t rage at all. 

There were so many people he’d never said goodbye to. His mother, his father, his siblings, his nephew. Silas. So many names on a list so full of regret that it was a wonder there was ever any left for anyone else. The idea of adding Rhett’s to it, the idea of losing him without whatever tiny semblance of peace a goodbye might offer…

“Don’t.” He choked on the word like a physical thing, like the lump in his throat was made up of something more tangible than grief. “Don’t just walk away. I don’t — I don’t want that.” He reached up with the hand Teddy wasn’t holding in a death grip, scrubbed it across his face and pretended it didn’t come back wet. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to be mad at you. I don’t know what else to be.”

—

“I know.” The statement was simple, but it said a lot. Anger was easiest, they both knew that. Facing the rest of it was… difficult. Complicated. And always, no matter how hard they tried, they were poisoned with a little bit of anger. “You can be mad. Hell, I’d be mad, too. But it doesn’t change what needs t’happen.” Closing the small distance that had grown between them, Rhett gracelessly pulled Emilio into a hug. “Take some comfort in knowin’ I’m goin’ out how I want, eh? Doin’ a good thing. Bein’ a good person.” He pulled back, framing the slayer’s face in his hands once more, a sad, tearful smile blooming on his lips.

Damn, wouldn’t you know it? He’d been wrong after all.

“I love you, little brother. And I’m gonna do whatever I have to to protect you. Right now, that means makin’ sure this bloody doomsday bullshit stays local.” Rhett looked to Teddy as he released the hunter, the fondness in his expression only growing. “Take care of him for me,” he muttered as he leaned in to give Teddy a hug as well, holding for a few extra beats before moving back again.

“Right. Well then, off you go.” An emotional sniff followed the dismissal as he gave a half-hearted wave of his arm.

—

Ted could hardly come up with something that felt right in that moment. Instead he nodded grimly at Rhett's request. Tried to slip on a smile, and squeezed the old man with all the love and warmth he wished he'd been able to give his brother so many years ago. It hurt to say goodbye, sure. But at least they were able to do so. It wouldn't just be another mystery, or start of a cycle of revenge and grief. After all, what were they going to do about Rhett's killer? The town was already destroying itself. The best they could hope was to be on the outside to watch it burn. 

—

If not for Teddy’s hand gripping his, Emilio would have fought it more. He would have dug his heels into the ground, would have refused to leave his brother to die alone in a crumbling town that neither of them had ever really made a home out of. Emilio was a stubborn man, loyal to a fault more often than not, and the idea of leaving Rhett here was so unfathomable that if not for the tragedy of it all, it might have been a laughable concept. But Teddy was holding onto him in a way that said he wasn’t leaving unless Emilio did, and Teddy was too good a man to be allowed to die for nothing. 

Gripping Rhett tightly in the embrace, Emilio buried his head in the warden’s shoulder for a moment, hating himself for the dampness left there when he pulled away. “You’re one of the best men I’ve ever met,” he said, “you fucking asshole. Doing the goddamn hero shit.” Dying so Emilio wouldn’t have to, despite knowing that there would always be a part of Emilio that wanted it. 

“I love you,” he muttered, the words sticking to the back of his throat, coming out garbled and feeling wrong even if they were probably the truest thing he’d ever said. Saying it hurt. Every bit of this hurt, from the tearful smile on Rhett’s face to the way he hugged Teddy just as tightly as he had Emilio. In another world, a kinder one, they could have been a family for a little longer than they had. They could have had something bigger. Something better. Something whole. But this world wasn’t built for things like that.

An unexpected panic built up in his chest as Rhett waved with a sense of finality that Emilio wasn’t ready for. Desperation creeped back in, and he shook his head again. “No. No, I’m not — I’m not ready. I can’t go yet. There has to be more time.”

—

It would be cruel to let Emilio know just how much his protesting was breaking Rhett’s heart, so the warden stuffed a cork so deep in that bottle that it wouldn’t be able to to spill a single drop, right up to the end. Turn it off. Turn it off. Just like he always had.

“More time’s only gonna make it harder. ‘Sides… we don’t have much left.” He offered another lopsided smirk, masking how badly this hurt. “Get outta here, ‘fore I gotta stuff you in the van myself. I’ll stand in the middle of the road and wave all dramatic, like a movie, eh?” He listed his arms again, this time giving a larger, more insistent ushering motion with both of them. “See you two in the next life. Make the best outta this one, first.”

—

If they waited until he was ready, they’d never leave. Emilio knew that. He’d stand here until the world fell down around them, would die and be buried and rot in the ground for a hundred years and still not be ready for this. There were some things, he thought, you could never be ready for. There were some things you could never be okay with. This was one of them. 

Bringing a trembling hand to his head, he scrubbed it across his face and nodded, feeling a little more unsteady on his feet than he had in a long, long time. He pulled Rhett in for another hug, fists gripping the back of the warden’s shirt tightly. “You’re an asshole,” he muttered into the man’s neck, the words coming out a little more broken than he’d like to admit. “I love you.”

—

Calling on pride while so much sorrow swam around one’s heart wasn’t fair, or even kind. But Teddy felt a swell of it nonetheless. At Emilio’s ability to speak his mind, at Rhett’s stalwart ability to go through with this despite how much it must hurt. The florist had no idea of what would await the warden at the end of this road. What would await them at their own destination. Too many unknowns. The only thing he knew for sure. The only thing Teddy knew for sure was that they had to keep going. That he was going to do his best to do exactly what Rhett said and take care of Emilio. No matter what. 

As if to seal that promise, Teddy moved in and kissed Em on the cheek. Softly smiling through the heartache. He turned towards the man, the hero, the fucking saint of batshit baddassery. “Thank you for everything… Bringing him to me. Always being there when we needed you. You’re amazing, you know that Rhett?” 

—

A breathy chuckle managed to squeeze itself from his aching lungs as Emilio called him an asshole for the second—third?—time. He returned the hug fiercely, ruffling the slayer’s hair as they reluctantly pulled apart. “Love you more, ya stupid fuckin’ muppet.” Throwing a wink at him, Rhett smiled, a little less sad this time, seeing the way Teddy slipped effortlessly into that supporting role. And then complimented him, which drew forth an exasperated scoff. 

“Nah, nah… m’just an daft idiot who’s good with weapons.” Slipping the rifle from his back, he flicked the safety off. “Do me a favor… pray that some weird beasties come tumblin’ outta all these rips in reality, eh? Could use a little excitement for the last ride.” His grin widened, returning to that familiar, reckless type of insanity that was his whole personality. “And hey! Be good to my wagon! If you total ‘er, I’m gonna haunt both your fuckin’ arses!” Rhett moved with finality now, bracing the rifle in front of him as the storm rolled in overhead and thunder boomed between the clouds. The plea for them to just get out of there was quarantined to his eyes, the rest of him looking terribly ready for a fight. 

—

“Haunt us anyway.” It was only half a joke, and the way his voice wobbled betrayed as much. It was a stupid notion, of course, because exorcising Rhett in order to keep him from becoming a poltergeist would only mean losing him twice instead of once, but God, Emilio would have killed for something to cling to. It wasn’t enough to have a worn old van and a rushed goodbye. Nothing would ever be enough.

His legs remained locked in place, refusing to move for a moment in spite of the way he’d already agreed to go. Walking away from this, leaving while Rhett was alive and animated and knowing this was the last time he’d ever see him in such a way, it felt impossible. It was too much; they were asking too much of him. He glanced back to Teddy, throat burning, trying to communicate that he needed the florist to take that first step towards the van, trying to say without words that Emilio needed an extra push if he was going to be expected to climb this mountain.

—

With a heaved sigh, Teddy nodded and curled his arms around Emilio. Held him tight for just a moment before ushering both of them towards the van. "Want me to drive, love?" It was half a question, half an announcement as he was already going for the keys. The hunter didn't seem in a particularly good headspace to be driving. Teddy walked with him to the passenger side. Scooching aside the slumbering raiju who was content and dreaming, completely unaware of how hurt everyone around it was. As he rounded the front of the old wagon he ran his hand along the hood. A soft sad smile as he gave it a pat, as if thanking the van for its role in giving him the opportunity to meet its…former owner. As if asking for forgiveness from the machine, for accepting it and letting Rhett go. 

They had miles to go before they could rest, but the first turn of the key would always be the hardest. Teddy's hand wavered on the gear shift. As they watched the form of Rhett Tangaroa slip into the mist and shadow. All he could do now was look to Emilio for permission. 

—

He waved, as promised. But something in him knew that the van would sit there for too long if he waited. So, with a sweeping bow, the warden took his exit. Backed away from the scene, bathed in the red of the taillights, that wild grin never leaving his face. 

Not until he turned on his heel and faced the darkness that loomed behind him. The forced exuberance wilted, eyes widening in the face of his own mortality. Wasn’t how he ever saw himself going. He fought for the greater good, sure, but only in the way he understood. Killing fae. This was… well, this was foreign. But, he thought to himself, suppose an old dog can learn new tricks. 

It was time to get to his spot. There were still hours to go, but Rhett wouldn’t be the one showing up unfashionably late and dooming the whole fuckin’ planet, not after all that game he’d been talking moments ago. 

One step forward, into the gathering fog. Do it for them. His heart thumped quickly in his chest. Do it for him.

Another step, and the warden was swallowed whole by the malignant force settling over the town. 

[monstersfear]

deathisanartmetzli​:

[pm] Because it’s full of cool rides and fun characters. And Teddy would love it. All you gotta do is keep your cool, and they have alcohol, so you can still relax. Just let us have our fun.

Meet you at the edge of town tomorrow, okay? Be safe.

/

[pm] You’d probably be better off going without me, you know.

See you then. You, too.

[monstersfear]

calm before the storm // teddy & emilio

TIMING: after pure love PARTIES: @eldritchaccident & @monstersfear SUMMARY: teddy comes home after spending a few days at levi's and then at metzli's, and he and emilio share a nice moment. CONTENT: some nsfw implicaitons

Lighter on his feet than he’d been in a long time, Teddy bounced his way back home. He’d stayed at Metzli’s a little longer than expected. Only a day or so, rather than the month he’d been exiled last time. Well. Not exiled. Hiding. Ashamed and confused and seeking the same person who ended up helping him again this time. Though, perhaps in the reverse order. Levi then Metzli. His ‘parents’ so to speak. Man that was a bag of cats to try and think about. They’d probably fight about as much as any of his foster parents had. Though none of them had supernatural abilities. So maybe it’d be a showdown worth watching. 

It felt weird to knock on his own door, but that was definitely the ave he wanted to go down. Just in case Emilio had been doing something or would somehow otherwise be caught unawares. Hell Teddy wasn’t even sure that he’d smell or sound fully like himself right now after spending so long away. And after… being a toddler. For a bit. That was rather weird. It didn’t feel like he’d rapidly de-aged and back again. More like, the memories fixated themselves into his past. Like they’d always been there. Probably why he felt so different. Also the second pact. That might have done more of a number on his insides than the brief stint as a youngin’ had done. Definitely gave him a renewed interest in learning the primordial language the Leviathan had written in, if only to know how it wrote ‘pumpkin pie’. 

With a lopsided smile, a bouquet of flowers (that hid a very special gift inside), Teddy shuffled from foot to foot and knocked. Like a teen picking up his date for prom. Just as awkward, just as giddy. 

— 

There was a knock on the door, and it took everything Emilio had not to groan at the sound of it. He’d wound up on the couch, at some point — not asleep, but not entirely aware, either, for however long it’d been since he’d sprawled out here. Not long enough to make him feel prepared for whatever client was knocking at the ungodly hour of… 3pm. Christ. 

The slayer pushed himself off the couch, grumbling under his breath as he stretched out his leg for a moment. “Vale, vale, ya vengo,” he called towards the door, shuffling towards it with a huff. He paused once he got to it, tilting his head to listen for a moment. It wasn’t the sort of precaution he would have taken a few months ago, but he figured he had a long list of people who’d kill him if he let someone who wanted him dead into his apartment, so caution had to be sloppily added to his list of exercises. 

The heartbeat on the other side of the door was a familiar one, he found, and immediately, the grumpy disposition melted away, a fond smile taking its place. He yanked the door open, raising a brow at the man on the other side. “You have a key, you know. Don’t gotta knock.” He reached forward, gently tugging Teddy into the apartment and shutting the door behind him.

—

Teddy fell into the apartment on fluttered feet, and allowed himself to gently crash into his slayer. A toothy grin split his cheeks wide. Almost enough to reach the new markings that dappled his skin. Although healed, he hadn’t escaped from the hunter fight unscathed. The fact that he was still standing at all was honestly impressive. But the scars and the brand new shock of white hair would definitely mark his ‘base’ form as… different. Something that might have been bad news if those hunters had friends or other people looking out for them. Teddy would just have to hope that Emilio’s detective work had been thorough. Not that he expected any different. He thought the fucking world of that man and pretty much anything he could do. 

“Yeah I know, I just didn’t call before and didn’t want to spook you.” He laughed, knowing both how easily the man was spooked, and how hard it was to actually scare him. Funny how those two things interact. “You’re usually a really hard man to surprise.” Teddy peppered Emilio with a few kisses before hoisting up the bouquet, which would definitely be a bit heavier than a bundle of flowers should have been. The fine glass bottle hidden in the foliage saw to that. Flowers were more Ted’s thing. The bottle would definitely win a few points in the hunter’s book though. As if he had to apologize for being away too long. 

— 

There were a few new scars marring Teddy’s features, and an absent sort of anger flared in the hunter’s chest. The men who’d put them there were dead already, of course, their corpses taken care of shortly after Teddy was deposited at the lighthouse and for a moment, the guilt Emilio felt for killing two fellow hunters evaporated. He’d done what he had to do, and there’d never been any doubt in his mind on that, but seeing Teddy now, like this? He’d done what he’d wanted to do, too. He’d given those men what they’d deserved. If anything, he’d gone easy on them.

“People come in without knocking all the time,” he pointed out with an amused snort. It was technically a business, even if Emilio was constantly irritated by the customers who chose to barge in. (Though, in all fairness, he was irritated by the ones who knocked, too. He’d never been much of a people person.) Grinning as Teddy kissed him, he leaned back a little to inspect the flowers. 

The petals probably had meanings behind them, ones that Teddy would know off the top of his head and Emilio would never understand no matter how many times they were explained to him, but there was something else lurking behind the bright colors, too. He saw a glint, his brows shooting up as he took the bouquet carefully and found it heavier than it ought to be. Moving aside some of the buds, he huffed a laugh. Carefully, he removed the bottle from the flowers, inspecting the label. “Pricier than my usual,” he teased, flashing Teddy a grateful grin. “Do we, uh… Put the flowers in water?”

—

"Probably a better idea than putting them in the whiskey." Teddy teased back, nuzzling into Emilio enough that he could fill his whole lungs with the hunter's scent. Warming him up from the long walk home with a mix of smoke and spice. A little sweet sweat and the subtle tinge of stale dried blood. Not his. Mostly. Ted laughed mischievously as he pressed his thoroughly chilled cheeks into Em's. Knowing full well how much the man hated the cold. Just had to let the hunter know what he'd been missing the whole time his partner had been gone.  It felt so good to be home. Even if they'd be leaving any day now, the place didn't matter. Only him. Only Emilio. 

"What do you think..?" He asked as he pulled back, noting how Emilio's brows ticked together at the sight of his new… appearance. "All things considered, I don't think the scars are that bad–" despite the fact that they covered a good quarter of his face now. And how he was pretty sure it didn't super matter how he shifted his shape now, the mark would stay one way or another. 

—-

“They can get their own whiskey. This bottle’s mine,” Emilio joked, smiling faintly as Teddy snuggled up close to him. He winced a little when the florist’s cold skin brushed against his, making a face. “You need me to warm you up?” The cold didn’t seem to bother Teddy as much as it did Emilio but, then, Teddy had grown up here, with Maine’s harsh winters. Mexico’s, by comparison, were much warmer. 

Leaning back a little more to better inspect Teddy’s new look, Emilio clicked his tongue thoughtfully. “I think you pull it off,” he offered. It was true — Teddy looked just as handsome now as he had before, even if Emilio hated that he’d had to go through what he had to earn the new scars. “You got any, uh… Pain left?” Emilio knew, better than most, that some things left a lingering physical sensation even long after they were finished. His leg twinged faintly, as if to offer him a reminder of it. 

—

"Yes, absolutely, I need a lot of warming up." This wasn't completely true. Teddy was very used to cold. He was honestly surprised it hadn't snowed yet, but maybe the strange hours the sky of White Crest had been keeping the worst of the real world weather away in favor of whatever whacky nonsense it wanted to throw at them. The florist sighed, lowering his hands to Emilio's and gently swayed both of them back and forth like a kid might do on the playground. Heart fluttering just as much as it might have if this was the first time Em had ever complimented him. 

"Feels a little strange, but uh– you know who did a pretty good job fixing me up. No pain. Head's extra chilly though, this isn't exactly the time of year I'd really ever shave my hair on purpose." Teddy breathed a laugh as he ran a hand over the fresh peachy fuzz behind the scar, hoping the mention of the demon wouldn't dampen the mood too much. He wanted this to be a wonderful reunion. And he definitely wanted to find out how exactly Emilio planned on warming him up. 

—

“Guess I’d better get on that,” Emilio responded with a quick grin. He made no move to pull Teddy towards the bedroom, though. After a few days apart, he just wanted to be with him for a while. To exist in the same space, to listen to his heartbeat, to remind himself in a tangible way that Teddy was safe and all right. It always felt like this, after time apart. No matter how brief it might have been, there was always a crushing sense of relief that came with the reunion. A side effect, Emilio figured, of being someone who’d lost a little too much.

The mention of Levi saw the slayer stiffening a bit. Looking to distract himself, he shifted to free up a hand, lifting it up to Teddy’s head and brushing the side of his head carefully. “Kind of like this look on you,” he admitted as he inspected the new haircut. “It’s soft.” And it looked good, too. Lucio had shaved Emilio’s head once when he was a kid, insistent that it would be better in the hot weather. He wasn’t sure if it was his uncle’s lack of barbershop skills or the shape of his head, but it’d looked awful. Made him look younger than he was, and he’d already had a young face. Teddy didn’t have that problem. On him, Emilio thought, the cut looked good. Of course, Emilio would think just about anything looked good on Teddy, but he was pretty sure he was right about this one. 

—

Teddy leaned into Emilio's hand. Brought his own up to meet it and just held it there. His smile softened to match the man's view of Teddy's appearance. "Oh yeah?" Had more time passed he might have made a joke about getting attacked by hunters earlier, but as it was the thought of that night still brought a hitch to Teddy's breath and a skip to his heart. For now he was more than content to just feel the radiating heat coming off Emilio's hand. Listen to the heartbeat that was clearer than it'd ever been. The second pact sharpened his senses, not that they were really dulling any time soon, but this was more.  

It felt like he could reach out and touch Emilio's energy. The very soul that called to him above all else. Levi might literally have had writing on Ted's ribs tying them for who knows how long, but there was something intrinsic to the whole of Teddy's being in how he felt about Emilio that seemed even more powerful. At least from his perspective. He might never get rid of that tug that pulled him towards the greater demon, but he had his angel right here. No matter what Emilio might fuss about Teddy thinking that way. The thought alone was enough to drive the florist to another quick kiss before leaning his forehead against the other's.

"Have you been eating? Microwaved non-perishables don't count. Nor does cold spaghetti-os" 

—

“Hate for you to go cold,” Emilio replied, grin widening just a little. With Teddy, it always felt easy to slip back into things. The moral conundrum he’d been grappling with since cleaning those hunters’ blood off his hands felt a little easier to carry when he was looking at the man he’d done it for, even if he knew it would never disappear completely. Trading lives was something every hunter learned the necessity of at a young age, and while Emilio never would have guessed he’d be doing it like this, he knew he made the right choice. The world was better with Teddy in it. He was certain of that.

He leaned into Teddy’s touch now, letting his forehead rest against the other with a low hum. “Haven’t starved,” he replied, shifting in a way that probably betrayed the fact that Teddy’s assumptions towards his diet were pretty spot on. “Don’t see why it doesn’t count. Food’s food, isn’t it? And if I eat it while you’re not here, you don’t have to smell it. Seems like a win for everyone, doesn’t it?”

—

A sense of total calm crept in the more they chatted, the longer their hands lingered in blessed contact. Teddy welcomed the rush of fluttered heartbeats, the way it pushed his chest out like he was host to a thousand butterflies all competing to be the brightest and most beautiful. Gone was the worry of keeping secrets, of how he had resolutely planned to go back to Levi. That they would probably see a lot more of each other under the guise of visiting Cass and Marina. Even after they left White Crest, wherever they settled was going to be close. He knew that much. They had to be. Metzli and Eilidh too, though there were probably a few less complaints about that pair than the sea squad. 

Some things were easier to talk about though. Like how Emilio's comment on 'smelling' the spaghetti-os was a bit more true than it'd ever been. So he remarked as such. "It smells like you bathed in them, babe. Didn't realize you were such a messy eater when you aren't trying to impress me." Teddy laughed, and started to scooch the pair of them over to the couch. "Y'know my nose is getting to the point where I can pick out ingredients of the daily special of the restaurant a block away with a whiff. I can’t tell if I love it or hate it." 

—

It was the calm before the storm. On some level, Emilio knew that. All the problems they’d had before — the town’s inevitable destruction, Emilio’s inability to even consider viewing Levi with anything less than a homicidal rage, the unsettled feeling that tended to build in his chest until it exploded time and time again — they were all still there. Even with the hunters that went after Teddy gone and no one left to avenge them, Emilio knew others would likely come at some point, would require killing in the same way that had left him with the heavy feeling in his chest now. But right now, in this moment, it didn’t seem to matter much. Those things could wait. Right now, Emilio just wanted to be in this moment.

He snorted lightly at Teddy’s comment, giving the other man’s shoulder a playful nudge. “Bullshit,” he accused, ducking his head to hide his grin. “You’re exaggerating.” He let Teddy lead him over towards the couch, taking a seat and tugging him down next to him when they reached it. “You gonna sniff me out like a bloodhound next time I’m late picking up groceries?” 

—

“Nuh-uh!!” Teddy’s eyes lit up as the rest of his face turned into a mockery of shock and betrayal. It was pretty clear however, from the continuous rumble of laughter and the fact that he opted to put more than half of his body on top of Emilio, that he was in no way upset at the man for calling his bluff. Ted found his favored spot and snuggled in even closer as he stretched out taking the rest of the couch as well. “I swear, everything is extra loud, smells way more strong. It’s one thing to be born like this but getting it now?”  He scrunched up his nose as if a particularly strong whiff of something caught him. 

“Maybe I will Em, What are you gonna do about it?” Like this, it was so easy to forget just how bad things were outside their apartment walls. How each hour was ticking away, the sky a kaleidoscope of danger and distress. Literal ghosts roamed the streets and monsters were becoming the mainstream. Hell, Teddy was one of them. But he was comfortable. Head resting on the man’s lap and a soft smile cast upward as he watched the subtle movements of Emilio’s face. This was home. This was where he belonged. 

—

Emilio hummed thoughtfully, nodding his head. He couldn’t relate entirely, but he remembered what it felt like to have his hunter abilities stripped from him and returned again during the mess of a broken promise to Regan. For him, there had been so much emotion tied into it that it had been difficult to really register the physical stuff, but he knew enough to know it was jarring. “You’ll get used to it after a while,” he offered, because that was a promise he knew he could keep. “Just takes time. Maybe we get you some headphones in the meantime. Block out some of the louder shit. Vivaporu under the nose.” And maybe Emilio would have to start dragging himself into the shower a little more often.

“Probably stop volunteering to get the groceries,” the hunter snorted in reply, letting his chin rest on the top of Teddy’s head as the florist snuggled against him. “Or find a way to make it more of a challenge for you. Can’t go letting you off too easy, hm?” He let out a quiet, contented sigh, body settling as much as it ever did. The world was probably ending soon, but that was all right. Emilio figured he had everything he needed, anyway. It was a good feeling.

[monstersfear]

eldritchaccident​:

[pm] I don’t know if I’ll ever understand why you think that way, Cortez. I know you like me, but I can’t say I’ve done much of anything for the world as a whole. Gave ‘em extra flowers? Ate a bunch of people who didn’t deserve it– 

Says you. I’ve seen what you eat, your tastebuds will thank me. Though I might need a necromancer to revive them. Oh shit that reminds me I gotta cancel our Soylent subscription it was supposed to start this month. Do you think they have an end of the world refund? 

;)

[pm] You’ve proven it to me more than enough times. Gave me a hell of a lot more than flowers. [...] You know I wouldn’t be [...] around if it weren’t for you, right? 

My tastebuds are doing just fine. A necromancer seems a little dramatic. And I’m sure they’ll make some kind of an exception. Might want to wait and make sure the world doesn’t actually end first, though. If it does, you can save yourself a conversation with whatever customer service they’ve got.

How about you come in here and try some of those seduction techniques in person?

[monstersfear]

deathisanartmetzli​:

[pm] Hope so. 

Disney World is an amusement park. Ask Teddy. He’ll tell you all about it as you two cuddle. And I hate to break it to you Emilio, but you can be put in handcuffs for punching somebody anywhere. Especially there though.

/

[pm] Me too.

Why would I want to go to an amusement park? I can get amusement for free. Without any parks. It’s the ‘especially there’ that I’m worried about here.

[monstersfear]

letsbenditlikebennett​:

[pm] So you. Always thinking of others and never petty. Kaden’s face isn’t punchable. His shins are pretty kickable though. But only I’m allowed to do that. […] Well, I try to use more current lingo and it just confuses you :/ And yeah, yeah. I definitely am. And of course I want you to meet her. You’re required by law to visit me which means meeting her. Plus, I’m pretty sure Athena and Teddy would have a good time together… though there’d be more baked goods than we’re physically able to eat. 

Emilio, you and Kaden are both hard to get along with. You’re both grumps. But I love that about you guys. […] You can’t just use Teddy as your example every time. :/ And I said most people over 25, not all. 

/

[pm] I’m always thinking of how I can give back. His face is punchable. And his shins are kickable. I feel like I should be allowed, once or twice. [...] It does not confuse me. I just think it’s dumb. There’s a difference. Required by law, huh? Guess I can’t argue with that, then. Sounds like the two of them are going to spend most of the time in the kitchen, then. Probably end up with some new recipes. Teddy says he’s gonna ‘fix my tastebuds,’ whatever that means, so I guess it’ll be good to see what they make.

I get along with more people than he does, I bet. How many people does he get along with? I’m going to make a goddamn list. [...] He’s a good example. [user is clearly still trying to think of examples.] Rhett. Anyway, I haven’t met ‘most’ people over 25, you know. I’ve met a few, and most of them happen to fucking suck. 

[monstersfear]

@oceansrevenge

[pm] What the fuck indeed. No, of course not. I do not want for affection that is not given by choice. That is a relief to here. You take care of him, okay? Emilio, we both know we'll see each other again. Teddy is important to us both and we /will/ be cordial if only for his sake.

[pm] Yeah, well, you did bind me to that goddamn son of a bitch for months, so you’ll excuse me if I don’t think too highly of you wanting to give people a choice in this kind of shit. [...] I will. He deserves that. [...] Teddy can hang out with you if he wants to. Doesn’t mean I gotta be there. I’ll be getting drunk at the nearest bar while all that’s going on.

[monstersfear]

eldritchaccident​:

[pm] What no late night hunts alone where I may or may not be super un-prepared to actually take on? […] Babe, I love you, I love dogs, dogs cannot replace you. I could have a hundred dogs and that would not replace you. Also are you really trying to undersell yourself THAT much. I do! Not everyone else does-–

Yeah that’s something we’re gonna have to try and fix over the years. I’m personally gonna figure out a way to heal your tastebuds. Even if it takes a lot of kissing. 

Ahh, si. ;)

[pm] I’m not unprepared. I’m very prepared. I don’t -- No, that’s not the point. Yeah, none of that. World needs you in it a good long while, Jones. Don’t cheat it out of that. [...] I don’t know. I can’t think of anything I can do that a hundred dogs can’t. That’s a lot of dogs, babe. Think you’re underselling them. 

My tastebuds don’t need healing. It actually comes in handy, you know. Easier to find something to eat if you don’t care what it tastes like. Means I’m never screwed over if I forget to grocery shop. But I’m not opposed to a lot of kissing.

Well, it’s working. 

[monstersfear]

lilian-adamson​:

.

[pm] I’ll let the philosophy nerds figure that one out at least. 

[…] Hell must be freezing over as we speak. 

Yeah. I don’t think you find this place if you’re in a good spot, to be honest. […] I couldn’t have said it better.  I’m glad I got to meet you, and everyone else. 

[User contemplates for awhile, realizing that there really isn’t much else to say without just being sappy]

No I think you’ve done all you can do, Emilio.  […] I got a friend coming over to paint tonight, and soon it’ll all be done. […] It was kind of funny. I picked up this phone just to crush it. Knowing my siblings they are gonna want to figure out what was going on in hopes of getting me back so […] I’ve been breaking everything to keep it from them. I know it’s shitty of me, but I think that’s what June did.  […] Still,  I reached out to people to say goodbye. I’m glad I did though. 

Take care of yourself, Emilio. I don’t want to be talking to you again for a long time. And tell Teddy I give him my best. 

/

[pm] I’m sure they’ll tell us about it. People like that don’t shut up.

Must be.

Yeah. However it ends, I’m glad for that, too. I’ll miss having you around, you know.

They’re probably not going to stop. Long as they live, there’s going to be a part of them that thinks about it, that wants to do it. Take it from me, Lil, that’s never going to go away. And you gotta be okay with that. You gotta understand, you know, that they’re always going to feel the way they feel. And it doesn’t make you shitty, and it doesn’t make them shitty. It’s just the way it goes.

I’ll tell him. You save a spot for me. Maybe I make it someplace decent, in the end.

[monstersfear]

deathisanartmetzli​:

[pm] Want to at least visit Piedras Negras or at the very least, Acuña. All my memories there are horrible. Wanna make some nice ones.

Let’s go to Disney World while we’re at it. Heard it’s the happiest place on earth, and you could use a little bit of that.

/

[pm] Fair enough. Maybe you can do that. Replace old with new.

What the fuck is Disney World? Sounds like the kind of place where I’d get put in handcuffs for punching somebody.

[monstersfear]

lilian-adamson​:

.

[pm]  Don’t really see the difference, but I guess I’ve never really seen the difference in that. If the actions the same I don’t know if the motivation really matters, but I guess that’s exorcist logic for you. 

[…] I can agree to that. 

Yeah I guess you’re right. […] Fucking sucks, but I can’t say that I’m not happy too you know? I don’t like how this town is ending, but I wouldn’t have met so many people that I love if I hadn’t come. I […] never been this close to finding a place to belong you know.  I can’t seem to regret it. Ya’ll actually made me happy. So I guess I did do that in the end. I’m okay with this.

Thank you. I think you’re right. […] Really thank you. I think that would be a big help for them. It […] actually is a big relief. 

/

[pm] I guess I go back and forth on whether or not it matters. I don’t think it matters when it’s me. 

[...] Hey, guess we can be on the same page about something in the end. 

Yeah. I get that. Kind of feel the same. Before I got here, you know, I was [...] in a bad spot. If I hadn’t met the people I met here, I don’t think I’d still be around. Wish it didn’t have to end the way it’s ending, but glad it happened anyway. That’s a new feeling, for me. 

Anything I can do to make things easier on you, Lil, I’ll do. You say the word, okay?

[monstersfear]

[pm] Well, that was [...] strange. For what it is worth, even with whatever was effecting us gone, I am glad you are no longer bound to myself or Levi. And I hope you are leaving with Teddy. [...] Despising you less is infuriating admittedly.

[pm] What the fuck.

That wasn't something you did? I should have let Teddy keep me handcuffed in the basement. Christ. Yeah, yeah, we're getting out. Hoping never to see you or it again.

[monstersfear]

Hi

[…]

I know things were rough last we saw each other. It’s been a little bit. I know. I’m sorry. I’ve just been trying to rebuild while everything else physically falls apart.

Just don’t forget you’re mi hermano, okay?

Wherever you go, if you choose not to stay in touch that’s okay. Really. I understand. Maybe what it takes for you to heal is to let me go, let all of us go. and keep Teddy. God. Emilio he is so good please dont

You won’t be alone of course. Luz has left you Wolfie on what’s left of your doorstep. And you have Teddy. Please keep Teddy. Teddy is good for you.

But don’t forget me, please?

[…]

I’m headed to Texas. Mateo and I are starting a family far away from all this. We’re keeping each other safe. I promise.

I’m just worried about you. I’ll always worry. I’m your little sister.

You’re getting out safe, promise?

[pm] Hi. I didn't think you'd want to speak to me again after- Christ, Vi, I didn't- I don't know what to- You know I'm not good at this. Not good at much of anything, but especially not this.

[...]

Yeah. Yeah, we're getting out. Me and Teddy, we're hitching a ride with a few people. I'm glad you are, too. But Christ, Vi, I don't want this to be goodbye for us. Not unless you want it to be. You want me out of your life, I'll go, no questions, but it's not what I want. And I sure as hell couldn't forget you. Not if I tried.

Teddy wants to go to Greece, for a while. Don't know shit about what's out there, but I figure I'll go with him. After that... I don't know. Maybe we'll come to Texas, if you'll have us. If you want us there.

[monstersfear]

eldritchaccident​:

[pm] Well maybe I don’t wanna live forever if it’s not with you, you know? Also a dog does not a boyfriend make. Might smell better than you though :P

Heard […] nice things about it. Foods real good! Supposed to be relaxing. We could vacation there at the very least.

I’ll give you a fucking handful tonto hermoso con cachetes bien amables 

[pm] I get that. Just [...] promise me you won’t do anything I’d do. Dogs are good. You can teach a dog to fetch. Couldn’t teach me to fetch. Hey, I thought you liked how I smell.

Baby, you know I can’t tell the difference between one kind of food and another. But you want a vacation, I’ll give you a vacation. Really put this fake passport of mine to the test. 

You been practicing your Spanish? Trying to impress me? Seduce me?