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metrics of success

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“People are always asking, “Who’s the real man? Superman, Kal-El, or Clark Kent? Batman or Bruce Wayne?” And they do this completely unrealistic and, I’m sorry, completely ridiculous thing where they pick the mask as being the sole personality. As if these different titles do not encompass many aspects of a greater personality. As if there isn’t a person behind that mask. As much as Bruce Wayne wants to assume that he is no longer a human being, but instead a symbol greater than himself, he is not that symbol; he is a man in a mask who uses that symbol. Bruce Wayne is certainly Batman but Batman is not Bruce Wayne. And as much as we’d like to think that the human being underneath the mask who lost his parents as a young child isn’t really the man we see when we look at Batman, but that The Bat is the main personality, that’s not doing Bruce Wayne any justice. The Bruce Wayne the population of Gotham sees is not the real Bruce Wayne. Bruce Wayne is a man who, after suffering a great loss, decided to go to the ends of the earth in order to protect the innocent and fight to ensure such tragedies will come to an end. The Bruce Wayne that Gotham sees is not who he is. The Batman that Gotham sees is not who he is. Bruce Wayne inside the suit is who that man really is. Then you have Superman, born Kal-El, raised Clark Kent. There are so many people who try to say that he’s Superman, he’s Kal-El, he’s Clark Kent. What they fail to take into account is that this is a very human man. Even Kryptonians, for all their differences, are very human. This is the story of an immigrant. From the time he was a baby, Clark Kent has lived on Earth and grown with a human family. His heritage is important, yes, but they did not make him the man that he is. His heritage, without his biological parentage, simply gave him his powers. It’s his Earth family who made him a man deserving of having them and capable of wisely using them. But the goofy and insecure Clark Kent that Metropolis sees is not the real Clark Kent. The real Clark Kent is the man that his parents welcome home when he visits their ranch. I would wager that Batman and Superman are never more themselves than when Batman calls Superman ‘Clark’ and Superman calls Batman ‘Bruce’. Both sides of their major personalities are inherently acknowledged in this exchange. They both see before them a person who is treated like a god but is really just as much a man as they themselves are. That’s why you’ll rarely see them referring to each other as anything by name in each others company. They both look directly at the myth and see the man. Yet they recognize, at the same time, that the man is the myth.”

—

(via baudyhallee)

Very nicely phrased, and I agree with these completely,

I also agree with Paul Dini’s assetion that the “true” person is neither the ultra-grim Batman, nor public Bruce Wayne, but the man who sits in front of the Batcomputer, in costume, but with the cowl pulled back, putting the pieces of the latest puzzle together. There’s a reason Ra’s al Ghul respects that person enough to refer to him as “The Detective”.

And for Superman, I think of the exchange between the Spectre and Norman McCay in “Kingdom Come”; McCay - Sometimes I forget he’s not actually from Earth

Spectre - A mere accident of birth

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I have to know. What was in Lexs emoji text he sent to Alfred. How many water drop emojis were included

🤡👏👏 ❌ 🙆‍♂️ 🔐🚘🔜🅰️‼️

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bruce wayne dilf agenda

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bruce and dick, father and son? classic. batman and robin, partners in justice? exciting. bruce and dick, brothers with a huge age gap? more likely than you think.

-

Jason: *loses in a game against bruce*

Bruce, patting his back: it’s alright son, let’s play again

Dick: *loses in a game against bruce*

Bruce: that’s for calling me old

Dick, screaming at Bruce: HOW COULD YOU?!

Duke, new to the fam, very concerned: what’s happening?

Tim: you don’t wanna know

Duke, nervous: …is it something really bad?

Tim, gravely: yes

Dick, shaking Bruce: HOW COULD YOU?! HOW COULD YOU DRINK MY SMOOTHIE?!

Duke:

Alfred: *pointedly looking at the broken window*

Bruce: dick did it

Dick, in space, on call with Alfred: i wasn’t even anywhere NEAR there

Cass: fuck!

Bruce: language

Steph: let my girl say fuck

Bruce: language.

TV playing in the background: ..nd SCORE! unfortunately, the Gotham Guardsmen have lost to Metropolis Metros once m—

Dick, from the couch: motherfUCKER

Bruce, angrily: metropolis BASTARDS

Cass:

Cass: not fair >:[

In a restaurant

Barbara: dick can you pass me the salt

Dick, with headphones on, not hearing her:

Barbara: dick? dick. dick!

Bruce: ill get it

Bruce: *reaches for the salt near dick’s plate*

Dick: *suddenly has his arms around his food, his fork clattering to the ground, their drinks spilling everywhere*

Bruce:

Dick:

Barbara:

Dick: ...in my defense these are some real good nachos

Dick: *waltzes inside bruce’s room, not saying anything*

Bruce: ...?

Dick: *looks at the pictures on the walls*

Bruce: can i help you??

Dick: *checks himself out in the mirror*

Bruce: please do that in your own room

Dick: *turns on the lights and rummages in the drawers*

Bruce: i already ate all the snacks there

Dick: *leaves* *doesn’t close the door*

Bruce:

Damian, also in the room:

Damian, in realization: jason got it from him

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the hours between 8-11pm should be reusable. optional mini time loop you can rewind and start over if you had more tasks to do or another book to read or the first three hours hanging out w your friend weren’t enough

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though while we're on the topic of League of Assassins training...if I was Ra's al Ghul and I took a chance on a skinny, spoiled kid from Gotham and he turned out to be one of the best martial artists of all time and went on to create the actual Justice League, I would also have a massive ego about that + you'd never hear the end of it

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Batlantern isn’t my wheelhouse either but the fact that Bruce was a fan of green lantern when he was a kid is just …….. getting truth serumed and asked who his favorite hero is and it’s green lantern it’s always been lantern it’ll always be lantern and yes that means Hal Jordan is his favorite superhero that’s his hero don’t look at me

Clark, with tears in his eyes: you mean it’s not ME?

Hal: oh fuck yeah I am NEVER letting this go, ever. ever.

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the Batfamily / military comparisons and Bruce/Batman as head of a family of soldiers has some flaws I’ve already covered but the problem with the whole connection isn’t that it’s not accurate. nah. my problem with making Bruce the Batfamily drill instructor is that drill instructors have the most fucked up sense of humor you will ever see. drill instructors will give you conflicting instructions just to watch you fall on your ass and give you a highly specific nickname related to how you fucked up that day that they then make all your friends repeat back at you. they will make you do pushups until you fall on your face and then call you a pussy for having your arms shake. they want to break you. it’s enrichment for them.

Bruce isn’t the Batkids’ drill instructor. He’s like if John Wick was a part time yoga teacher who recently skimmed a bunch of books on gentle parenting.

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Porn fic that takes fifty thousand words to get to the fucking and it's not even a slow burn, it just takes that much worldbuilding to properly contextualise the author's incredibly specific kink.

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DC comics will be like “Bruce Wayne was a playboy billionaire, the sexiest man in the room, alluring” and then draw him like a fucking potato

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How often do you think Alfred looks up at the portrait of his late lovers in the sitting room of Wayne Manor, deeply inhales, and says, "Our boy.... is testing me again"

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I refuse to let DC reboot their way out of a warped timeline. No explaining it away, lean into it.

Tim drake is a 90s kid. He is seventeen, he grew up alongside computers and listens to terrible rock rap. Jason, one year older than him, is from the 80s and the height of the AIDs epidemic. Dick, maybe six years older than Jason, is from the 40s. Babs, five years older than dick, is from the 50s. The year is 2025. Bruce Wayne has just turned 40.

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It’s actually kind of wild to me how Bruce Wayne holds so much power over Superman simply because he could tell Clark one day “I don’t believe in you” — not that he doesn’t think Superman exists, but that he doesn’t believe in him, the symbol. From his closest friend and ally, that would take Clark out at the knees. We saw it in Injustice, and even lampshaded in BVS. Bruce’s belief in Superman — that Clark is a good person, that he has control over himself, that he uses that control to do good things — is so important to how he views himself in many iterations. He checks himself by the humans around him, and holds Bruce in the highest regard (maybe after his Ma).

The same can’t necessarily be said the other way around. Losing Clark’s belief in his Mission would be crushing for Bruce, but not in the same way. He will still do what he needs to do and broil in that self hatred. Losing Clark’s belief in him doesn’t stop him, it just adds to the self hatred already present. Bruce already thinks he’s a much lesser man than Clark, as we’ve seen. Clark, meanwhile, holds Bruce up as one of the best men he knows. But they both take a loss of “belief” from that “greater” man in very different ways.

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Yizhi, over the phone: Tell me when you and Shimin are home safely

Zetian: We're home dangerously

Yizhi: Stop it

Zetian: We're home lethally

Shimin: Zetian just hit someone with the car

Zetian: We're home alarmingly

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I know that HRT gives you secondary sex characteristics in one direction or another, but we HAVE to stop telling nonbinary people that they “can’t pick and choose.” Of course, you can’t tell your testosterone that you’d rather not grow chest hair, but there are things you can do!

You could go on T so your voice drops and start shaving so you don’t grow a beard. You could start HRT and then stop once you get the permanent changes you like. You can pursue sterilization instead of bottom surgery. You can get top surgery without being on T. You can go on E and work out a bunch to bulk out your muscles. You can pursue laser hair removal or electrolysis to remove unwanted hair, with or without HRT. You could even just start hormones to see if you like it and then stop if it isn’t to your taste.

Obviously, you can’t order secondary sex characteristics a la carte, but we have to stop being so awful to nonbinary people. We should discuss the options we have, not shut down the conversation with “that’s what you get.”