moontimemumblings - Tumblr blog

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While the need for silence has kept me away from the virtual world, there is also another reason for my silence particularly here on Tumblr for the past month and a half. I had applied to a couple of universities in the US for MFA in Creative Writing. While I couldn’t make it to a couple of fully-funded programs, The New School in New York has given me admission. And this is an expensive private school that was not even on my cards until a friend suggested it saying it’s a great community of artists and that one of his friends had studied there. I have this great opportunity staring at me but I’m feeling helpless. Banks don’t give me loans as I have nothing to pledge (wonder why they even call it education loan), and a couple of sources I was counting on backed out in the past few days and am running out of time to arrange for funds. Good folks on Tumblr, please let me know if you know if you know of any organisations/institutions that might be of help. This is a great opportunity and my eventual dream of translating some world-class Kannada works into Englilsh (apart from my own writing attempts) will have some great exposure if I get to study in New York. This is something I know I’m good at and I’m hoping to make it happen with some help.

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View from the office terrace. The sunset time is always beautiful. Every day. Day after day.

Can't. Get. Enough. Of. It.

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You are a calamity in my calm life, a disaster that I don’t even try to avert.

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<3 <3

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I am longing for a hug right now...

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A friendship that has endured longer than any other...

I requested VB to meet me for at least an hour because I need some advise about some of the most important decisions I need to make in the next few weeks. He is someone who I respect and trust a lot, like a father figure, I can now safely say. In fact, he dislikes the fact that I never ask for help even when HE thinks I need it and I’ve always told him, “see that’s the thing, YOU think I need help, not I”. And I have managed so far, making my own choices, sometimes good ones and sometimes making bad ones and hurting myself, telling myself that that’s how one learns. But time has come to seek help, something I haven’t done in a long, long time. I’ve been reading him ever since I was a high school girl and got to know him almost ten years ago.

When I called him this morning, he was like, “wait, am I really talking to Sourabha Rao? I’m glad I came to your mind, you crazy girl. You are someone I’ve always been proud of and you need to stop being harsh on yourself. So many people come to me asking for favours, only few worthy of them. But here you are, never wanting anything. I shall meet you soon and we’ll discuss. Don’t be hesitant, and don’t me harsh on me either. Let me be your friend.” He then started talking about some silly things and I know he did that to make me feel comfortable. He still remembers the crowded rooftop bar I had taken him to in 2016 and said he would meet me there if it still happens to be my favourite place. It still is. I was in tears towards the end of the call, feeling vulnerable. I would have probably cried if he were before me in flesh when he said what he said. I stood still for a couple of minutes after the call, fighting the tears back, recalling his words and feeling immensely grateful already. Is that what being taken care of feels like?

He is going to London for the Commonwealth Summit 2018, so I’ll get to meet him once he’s back.

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Our CEO just shared this video, calling it 'Wildlife at Toehold'. So that's the view from his cabin! These white-cheeked barbets visit us almost every day, among other birds like pigeons and kites and crows, too. And tens of butterflies, too!

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This means I’ll be able to see my writing in print again. TheState has only digital presence, so this has its own timeless charm. This also means more disciplined writing in Kannada and more responsibility. Yesssss! <3

So I’ll have my own column in Vishwavaani as well!

The Editor-in-chief introduced me to the subeditor, who will call me back with the details and the initial formalities.

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What a devilishly handsome man this one was. Something happened and he has become more special to me (a detail that’s a little more important than me being one of his fans) and I can’t speak of it right now. Gah, it’s so hard to keep secrets!!!

Marlon Brando, 1950

“Lying for a living. That’s what acting is. All I’ve done is just learned how to be aware of the process.”

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Pole Trance

I love the name of our Svalbard Wildlife Photography Expedition - ‘Pole Trance’! While the awesome polar bear is the main subject of photography on this expedition, the walrus, different species of seals and whales, the pretty Arctic tern, Arctic skua, the kittiwake and guillemots are photographed as well. I asked my journalist friend VB if he wants to go to Svalbard with our ace natural history expert and photographer JS on this expedition and he says he’ll let me know. Both men are big names in their respective fields and I would love to introduce them to each other. VB is into wildlife photography as well, so I foresee the acquaintance becoming a long-lasting friendship.

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Who was that wise person who said something like ‘ask not what the world has done for you, but what you have done for the world’?

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So I'll have my own column in Vishwavaani as well!

The Editor-in-chief introduced me to the subeditor, who will call me back with the details and the initial formalities.

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Record commute time from home to work

Thirteen minutes! There wasn't much traffic and twas a lovely ride. My two-wheeler is probably my best friend! Vroom!

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A calm ruin of a girl

More than a year ago, I had called myself that in a letter I wrote to that Canadian who later turned out to be the dumbest, most arrogant guy I ever met. I still feel like I wasted the 5 hard-earned leaves I took to travel with him here in India, showing him some of my favourite places in the Western Ghats. One of the worst experiences of my life. Anyway, so this poet called herself 'a soft calamity of a girl' in one her recent poems and I wrote to her saying, that's interesting because it's similar to 'a calm ruin of a girl'. It's true that the world is old and whatever we say is probably been told by someone somewhere in the past, but a reply for the sake of courtesy would have done. Anyway, none of this matters because I'm done calling myself that. Life's been really good and I've been quite happy about how things are turning out. Hard work, that's all that matters.

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Wrote a lot about Kenya at work today - based on the videos and photos our photographers have made on their latest visit. I’ve been writing about African countries like Kenya, Ethiopia, Tanzania and Botswana vicariously for so long that it’ll be a shame if I don’t see them soon. I’m most excited about Kenya though - the ‘Mecca of wildlife’ as my Editor refers to it as most of the time - especially to witness The Great Migration in the Mara-Serengeti ecosystem. Amboseli, Nakuru and Samburu County are also places teeming with various wildlife. So yes, at least Kenya, to begin with...

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<3

Strolling along the Banks of a Pond by Camille Corot, c.1865

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@toelmoum-finisterrae, this is so beautiful my friend. Thank you for sharing...

ti / you

© Toel Moum, 2018