mortuarylane - Tumblr blog

[mortuarylane]

A few weeks ago I asked for suggestions for NHLers I needed to convince my boyfriend to love. This is the product of that insanity.

[mortuarylane]

Lowkey wanna be a puck bunny, but I highkey don’t have the body for it

[mortuarylane]

Penny: Farmer, your turn! Two truths and one lie!

Farmer: Okay, so… My favorite color is red, I’m right-handed…

Farmer: And I explored all 120 floors of the mines and donated all my valuable artifacts to Gunther so he would give me a rusty key, letting me go down to the sewers and meet a friendly shadow guy, who I’m now letting live in my house to protect him from the dwarf assassins.

Penny: Oh, Farmer, as entertaining as that story was, I think you should make the lie a bit less obvious-

Sam: They’re left-handed.

Penny:

Sam:

Farmer:

Penny: YOU WHAT

[mortuarylane]

Harvey: No Schemes, No Plots, No ruses

Farmer: *somber voice* ok…..

Harvey:*leaves the room*

Farmer: But he didn’t say anything about shenanigans

[mortuarylane]

If you think I’m cute or like my posts, you’re legally obligated to tell me, anonymously or not 🤭

[mortuarylane]

Record me while you fuck me, save each moment of us then make me watch it as you fuck me all over again

[mortuarylane]

not arguing with a girl who whimpers and whines while grinding on my leg as i play with her nipples like ok whatever you say beautiful 😔🫣

[mortuarylane]

what’s a girl gotta do to get tied to a fucking machine and overstimulated around here

[mortuarylane]

Need to eat her out until she's so wet I'm swallowing between each suckle. Until the neck of my shirt is soaked, the sheets are soaked, everything because I got a little too sloppy in my hunger. I need to drown in her.

[mortuarylane]

leaving hickeys at the top of her thighs after you're done eating her out because an artist signs their work <3

[mortuarylane]

here's a fake interview about my me & my girlfriend that i transcribed from my head. enjoy!

[mortuarylane]

my love language is rolling joints/blunts <3

[mortuarylane]

“this is all for your pleasure but your pleasure is for me” is such a good dynamic. they can’t stop giving you more, more, more - can’t pull their fingers out of you, can’t stop hitting that one spot that makes you shiver. them fucking you selfishly, taking everything they want from you - and what they want is your pleasure.

[mortuarylane]

Harvey is 💯 freaky

how we feelin’ about the chart? don’t tell me harvey’s is wrong i KNOW he’s a FREAK (hot air balloon moment).

[mortuarylane]

[mortuarylane]

Reblog this if your self respect completely dissipates when your pussy gets wet, suddenly you have no dignity and will do anything to cum.

[mortuarylane]

Actual image of me fighting for my fucking life on discord