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mark jumped slightly when he felt blair pull him into a hug, and despite the growing feeling of embarrassment in the situation he allowed himself to sink into her embrace. he wouldn’t say it, or rather he couldn’t, seeing as he currently had the worst case of hiccups in history, but he was grateful for the comfort at the moment.

“a cry baby? well, that’s a nice way to say it.” he waits to speak after a bit, when his crying simmered down to sniffling, and chuckles hoarsely in response. twisting slightly into a more comfortable position, limply dropping his arms onto her lap. a moment of silence carries out between the two for a bit before mark speaks, quieter and in a more hushed tone this time.

“you know, you don’t need to right? i could’ve been fine here, maybe i would’ve cried a bit more but i would’ve been fine.” he sighs, breathing out through his nose in a slightly saddened manner.

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the sudden shaking caused mark to yelp slightly in surprise, head flying up as his world was rocked back and forth (literally). his eyes were wide as he watched blair, seeing how….emotional she had become? it wasn’t a strong-front of hers exactly, and 90% of the time he didn’t even really know what was happening.

her fingers dug into his shoulders, causing him to wince slightly in pain. still, she looked more like a washed-up version of the mona lisa, his tears blurring his vision considerably. sniffling, he looked up at her like a lost child.

lost

that’s what he was.

“i-i know i can’t, but jesus christ blair what if he could’ve been one of those people? huh? just what fucking if!? a-and then what about the next person? and the next? and the next?!” and then he’s losing it again, the tears streaming down his face once more as he allows his face to disappear into his sleeve.

“i know its worthless that i’m crying, but i can’t help it.” he sobs, the sound muffled by hi bloody jacket sleeve.

She was so frustrated with him that she was certain that storm clouds would have been stirring up outside. It made no sense to her how Mark, out of all people, could be so tied up with these mistakes (and it was hardly a mistake if he’d done his best) when he had already done so much good for people. She took a deep breath, willing herself to calm down before these passive skills of hers actually caused a thunderstorm, and instead sat herself down next to him.

With her grungy attire and dark rimmed eyes, she was a stark contrast to the young and bright doctor beside her; but perhaps that was what had drew them together to begin with. They were like opposing images of each other.

“God… Shut up, Mark,” she grumbled an arm reaching over his shoulder. She pulled him into a tight embrace with his face in her shoulder, a hand making soothing motions on his back. “You know, you were always a cry baby,” she gave a tiny, bitter chuckle, “But grow up so I don’t have to take care of you anymore.”

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when mark feels her go limp in his arms, he takes that as a sign to hold her closer. maneuvering his body so that he is sitting next to Jinsil instead of in front of her, and her head is on his shoulder, he listens to her as she speaks about what happened.

“that’s...” he trails off as a sense of uneasiness comes over him, eyes darkening at the thoughts flooding his brain. absentmindedly pulling her closer against him, jinsil’s all-too familiar scent of roses and ancient books fills his nose, and he finds himself relaxing a bit.

it was alright. she was safe, albeit physically and mentally damaged, and so was he.

the two were alright. she was safe, and despite mark wanting to keep her against him for the rest of eternity the mere thought caused him to heat up and-

“not now, gods not now.” he whispers under his breath, shaking his head slightly as if telling himself to stop it. that now wasn’t the time to push her away, that he couldn’t do that to her. that despite the guilt pushing through his heart, wanting him to tell her something, that now wasn’t the time.

he takes a breath, and counts.

one

two.

“that’s terrifying, i am so sorry jinsil that you had to have that happen to you.” he shudders a breath as he turns his head and plants a soft, comforting kiss to the top of her head. 

a soft, comforting kiss. nothing more.

“i want you to listen to me jinsil. your friend has some of the best doctors this island has to offer working on her, and i know t all personally. your friend is going to be alright, i promise you, but i’m more worried about you.” he says softly, leaning his head onto hers as he stares off into the wall. thoughts, flying through his brain at a million miles per hour, cause his mind to go fuzzy and he squeezes his eyes shut.

“come with me, let me fix you up and we’ll talk.” he sits up a bit more, gently maneuvering out of her grip and standing. extending his hands out to help her up, a determined yet peaceful look on his face, one thought stuck to him.

soft and comforting, nothing more.

— this little light of mine.

mpmark:

( … )

“its not your fault, jinsil, god no its not your fault. if anything you made sure your friend is alive and surviving the entire ordeal. and who can blame you for wanting to spend quality time with someone else?” he sighs through his nose, drawing her close again in a huge bear-hug.

he felt her cry into him, and swore that his heart had shattered.

after allowing her to get some grief out of her system he twisted his head so he could talk into her ear, not wanting to release her from his hold since he wanted her to feel safe.

“you said that ‘it’ attacked you, what was it? did you see? was it a creature or a demigod.” or worse, a god he thought to himself silently. heaven help them if it was a god above all others, especially since a great deity probably wouldn’t go down without a fight.

She flinches back hard when the other shakes her roughly. She’s never been fond of being manhandled. Downright hates it regardless of whoever it comes from. And in the state that she’s in right now, she really doesn’t need it. Even though somewhere in her head she rationalizes that Mark doesn’t mean any ill will, she can’t help but want move back as far as the wall and chair will let her. But with the firm hold he has on her, she can’t really go anywhere.

She eyes him wearily as he apologizes for his suddenly brash behavior and all she offers him is a weak smile. She feels the urge to tell him that it’s alright, but she can’t find the strength to say them because she’s not sure if anything is alright anymore.

Instead she listens to him. Observes the flurry of emotions that make their way across his face as he continues on. She takes in the concern, the anger, and overall distress the other goes through as he tries to explain himself. When he takes a moment to compose himself, she resists the urge to comment on his thoughts of her as a best friend. Disbelief and a little bit of sadness flickers on her face briefly before she ducks her head down again. She doesn’t want him to see it.

She wants to ask more on the matter. Wants to know why she’d been seeing less and less of him. Why he’d stopped texting her back or answering her calls. Why he seemed to stop caring all of a sudden. Of course, at first the behavior had gone unnoticed. Too wrapped up in matters of her own, every unsuccessful attempt to get a hold of him was brushed off with the reasoning that the other was busy. It wasn’t that long before she’d caught on, though.

She remains quiet as he offers nothing but comforting words and leans into the hug when he offers it. Her tears reduced to nothing but quiet sniffles, she pushes her thoughts away and lets the questions die on her tongue. She hesitates at first, but slowly lifts her arms up to reciprocate the hug. Though there’s a dull ache in her limbs, throbbing in the places where she had been struck, and the overall situation of the hug is kind of awkward, she sighs in relief. If there was anything that she missed about Mark, it was that he always gave the best hugs in her opinion.

Allowing herself the small comfort, she practically sagged into the other’s hold. Exhaustion and fatigue suddenly weighing her down. Whatever energy she had left, completely spent on her earlier breakdown.

“I didn’t.” She responds softly, voice still thick from her earlier tears. “It was really dark where we were,” She exhaled heavily. “All of our things- we left everything behind as soon as we heard it.” She continued. “It wasn’t like anything I’ve ever seen before.” She shuddered at the memory. Picturing something darker than the night itself, smokey wisps and bright glowing eyes lashing out at her from the darkness with elongated claws, she trembled. “There’s no way that it was human.” She whispers.

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mark hummed in response, fingers working through the woman’s hair as he kept his eyes on the wound. he was thankful that she wasn’t one of those people that constantly tried to call for attention when he was working, it only made the job harder. still, he was more thankful that she hadn’t bit him yet above all things.

mark paused, glancing down at her next comment about pain, an unreadable thought crossing over his eyes before he resumed his actions. despite her dismissive manner in the belief, a small pain ripped through his chest as unwanted memories began to leak into his current thoughts and he silently wondered to himself if such pain counted for mental.

shaking his head slightly as a more relaxed expression comes over him, he nods as he listens to the woman, eyebrows raised in an impressed manner. his hands and eyes work to find the remaining glass, but his ears are trained on her.

“no, please, don’t apologize. it was actually quite interesting, most people i talk to that are outside my work don’t usually know that kind of stuff.” he pauses to chuckle slightly. “then again, i can’t say the same for all of my colleagues.”

“true, i did get off my shift not that long ago but six cups of coffee have me up for a while, so you don’t need to worry.” he smiles briefly, a thin-lipped expression that masks his slight exhaustion. it was true that he was quite awake, however, if anything he just wanted to sleep after this entire ordeal to the best of his ability.

“duly noted.” he nods, eye brows raising slightly in question at her yawning. “sixteen hours? my god are you sure you aren’t a bear in winter?” he giggled, but quickly shut his mouth when he realized his humor was anything but humorous. 

“do you by any chance have work? i don’t have any slips with me, but i could write your employer a note giving you leave for a few days, or at least until your ankle heals a bit.” he gestures with his head towards the injury, turning back towards the wound as he plucks out any remaining pieces of glass.

“alright then, i’m pretty sure i have everything out but if it starts hurting you again or if you feel any discomfort please call for me at the hospital. i’ll be more than happy to assist you.” he reassures, setting the tweezers down against the small pile of bloody glass on his night stand. still, even despite his hope, he knows the lady probably won’t accept his offer. 

turning his head to look over at the ice-covered ankle, he puts his hands on his hips in a curios manner.

“well, there isn’t much i can do for your ankle other than to tell you to ice it and keep it elevated. oh, and to also not walk on it. i could give you some crutches i’m sure have laying around here somewhere if you’d like?” he looks back off to her, in his mind knowing he probably shouldn’t be sending her off with an injury like that but knowing that if he even suggests it, she’ll probably bite his head off.

hands off;

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“well, you are correct about brain damage, but as long as you’re talking to me you should be good.” mark shrugged, glancing up at the woman with a raised eyebrow. “alright, no honey? gotcha.” he smiled slightly to himself. people tend to put up a thick shield at first, but mark would respect this woman’s interests seeing as she was as friendly in the moment as an enraged wasp.

“no painkillers? alright then. you must have a better pain tolerance than i thought, for most people i had to stop them from taking too much.” he grabbed the bottle and, after kicking the door open to his cabinet, chucked it back in and closed the door. his focus then changed to her head as he went looking for the glass pieces again.

“is that so? i knew about the separation between the jobs but i wouldn’t have guessed it to be an offense for the two to overlap.” he hummed, gaze intent on the parted hairs as he searched for the shiny fragments. his tweezers were in one hand as looked, and when he found one piece hidden underneath a few strands of dark hair, he was quick to reach in and pull it out.

“yea, uh, sorry about that. most of the patients i receive come to me in shock and are in pretty bad shape, and i’ve learned that sometimes the littlest things can cause distress or major harm for certain people. i usually try to make sure everything is taken care of for them, so i guess the behavior is kinda ingrained in my head now.” he chuckles sheepishly, shrugging a bit as he glances down towards her.

“doesn’t suit me? well, that’s the first time i’ve heard that.” he smiles a bit, but then it falls once he realizes that it is less than a joke. “sorry. i spend a lot of my time worrying, so i guess i kinda get used to the stress after a while.” he rubs the back of his neck as he looks down at the blanket.

“anyways! i have glass to get out of your head and i guarantee that you are less than happy about staying here for so long, so i’ll try not to take any more of your time up.”

“Good to know.” Only in the way that if someone could still hold a conversation with you, you had to hit them a lot harder. Still useful, though. “No honey, no sweetie, no variation thereof. I’m neither your girlfriend nor a five year old cancer patient.” Which to her seemed like the only people someone should be calling such things.

“Pain is necessary; makes you stronger. Only weak people are desperate to avoid it,” she muttered, huffing quietly and shrugging so that he wouldn’t take her words too seriously– after all, some people might find that mentality harmful or alarming, she supposed.

“When the jobs overlap there can be an incentive to misdiagnose or over-prescribe– they could prescribe something more expensive if the patient is buying the drugs from them, or diagnose them with something more severe so they have to pay more. It was mostly something to protect the patients from getting screwed over from either side.” She paused, pressing her lips together for a moment. “Sorry, I took an ancient medicine course back in university. I don’t know why I’m telling you about it.”

She sighed, rolling her eyes. “Well, I’m not in shock, so you can relax. This is nothing,” she murmured, stifling a yawn. It must have been close to dawn, she would have to get home soon, before she crashed. “Should I be letting you do this? You must be tired, aren’t you? Fresh off a shift and all,” she commented, gesturing vaguely to his attire.

“What, do most people you associate with enjoy being coddled?” She scoffed softly, crossing her arms. “It’s fine, just maybe try to talk to me like I’m a competent adult.” Honestly, she was too tired to actually be annoyed, she was just complaining for the sake of it.

“Unless you want me to hibernate for sixteen hours here, being quick would probably be wise.” As if she even could sleep for that long– she had a six hour shift to look forward to that night, which would be a real treat with a busted ankle.

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Bloody Mary | Mark & Irene

@mpireneizanami

tw- blood and slight gore

when the time comes for one to use their skills outside of the normal setting, most will be nervous and scared.

except for mark. he was fucking terrified.

it seemed to him that time had completely frozen as he stared down at irene on his dining room table, watching how her equally pale skin turned lighter than the moon, how her eyes fogged over as they rolled to the back of her head, and how blood glossier than melted wax flowed from the gunshot in her torso.  

yup, very terrified.

however, no matter how scared he was, he knew irene depended on him and his skills in her unconscious state. she couldn’t fight for herself, so he would have to fight for her.

he had already grabbed his gloves and tools (scavenged from around his apartment, mind you) and his eyes had already found the source of the blood, so all that was left was to take the bullet out. nudging closer, mark took a few deep breaths before pulling up the hem of irene’s shirt to get a better look at wound.

he wished he hadn’t.

the wound was a complete mess. it was clear the bullet was somewhere stuck inside irene, but the mangled flesh around the entryway made it hard for mark to see where exactly it had entered. leaning forwards, gloved fingers pushed around the blood and skin until he managed to find a very inconspicuous hole near her bellybutton, round enough to be caused by the bullet, and set to work on trying to find the damn thing, using his fingers, a scalpel he managed to find, a pair of tweezers, and surgical scissors. he had to work fast, he knew, because at any second irene might wake up and that would be bad.

very bad.

however, amidst the entire ordeal and hectic race against the clock, mark failed to notice the twitching in irene’s leg.

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mark nods in concern as jinsil speaks, allowing her to get her words out before responding. still, with each passing word, his questions grew fewer and his eyes grew darker. concern now was not the only thing present in his gaze.

there was rage.

“don’t you dare say that.” he says, giving her a small yet strong shake as he stares at her intensely. he pauses for a second, realizing how he was getting carried away in his anger, and softens his hold on the girl. “i’m sorry for being harsh it’s just...you shouldn’t have gone alone, no matter what, so don’t say that. if you had, you’d......i’d...” he sighs, closing his eyes briefly as he turns his head away. his jaw is clenched, his teeth grinding in an effort to keep his cool.

“if you had gone alone there would have been a much smaller chance that you would have gone out alive, and the last thing i want to do is pick up my best friend off the ground in pieces.” he turns back to her, his eyes now filled with sadness instead of anger. still, there was a glint of frustration in its center.

“its not your fault, jinsil, god no its not your fault. if anything you made sure your friend is alive and surviving the entire ordeal. and who can blame you for wanting to spend quality time with someone else?” he sighs through his nose, drawing her close again in a huge bear-hug.

he felt her cry into him, and swore that his heart had shattered.

after allowing her to get some grief out of her system he twisted his head so he could talk into her ear, not wanting to release her from his hold since he wanted her to feel safe.

“you said that ‘it’ attacked you, what was it? did you see? was it a creature or a demigod.” or worse, a god he thought to himself silently. heaven help them if it was a god above all others, especially since a great deity probably wouldn’t go down without a fight.

— this little light of mine.

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( … )

“what am i doing here? i work here jinsil, you silly bird. why else would i be here!” he chuckles slightly at her comment before he falls silent once more, the weight of the situation she was in currently dawning on him. nudging back slightly to view her face, he scooped her cheek with his hand and looked down at the cuts littering her skin, eyebrows furrowed together.

“did someone get hurt? are you hurt? what happened?” he fired at her, intent on learning the gravity of the situation. if someone she knew was in the emergency room he’d probably jump up right then and there, intent on helping whoever it was in a sign of good faith.

and also, because he didn’t like seeing jinsil hurt whatsoever.

She doesn’t understand it quite yet, but something about the other’s presence has always had a calming effect on her. Though she’s unprepared for the hug when it happens, and the sudden movement makes her flinch again, she settles into it. Lets herself relax into his hold and lets her tears die down into quiet sniffles. Allows herself the comfort of being held even though somewhere in her head, she believes that she doesn’t deserve it after what’s happened. The sound of her voice calms her. The little chuckle he gives after he answers, almost makes her want to laugh along.

Her mind has always been so fast paced after all. Just a little second of carefree banter has her almost forgetting her reason for being there in the first place.

Almost.

She doesn’t because as soon as he lifts her cheek to examine her, everything rushes back and she feels the guilt and worry hit her tenfold. The look of concern and questioning in his eyes makes her so uncomfortable that she forces herself to look away. She doesn’t deserve this, she thinks. She feels her eyes brim with more tears and her breathing start to turn ragged once more. She tries to keep her emotions at bay, but before she knows it, they’re spilling out everywhere in the form of stuttered explanations and tearful apologies.

”I-I-I just wanted to go stargazing.” She begins, clenching her eyes shut in hopes of stopping the tears that made tracks down her face. “A-and I i-i-invited a friend a-along to my usual sp-spot near the f-forest.” She sucked in a ragged breath before she could continue.

From there, she explained the earlier circumstance as best as she could. Pausing to breathe or just calm herself whenever she felt herself get a little too worked up. She told him of the initial attack, how both her and her friend began running for their lives, how Jinsil hadn’t noticed the other trip and fall behind until she heard them scream, the scuffle that ensued when she ran back to help them. She provided him with the details the way she remembered them.

”I don’t even know how I managed to fight it off.” She murmurs quietly as an afterthought after she finishes her story. Eyes now open and focused on her hands as the fidget in her lap. “Or how I managed to carry them all the way here.”

She exhales another ragged breath and clenches her eyes shut once more when she feels tears start to prick at her eyes. “I-I should have just g-gone out by myself.” Her hands clench into fists in her lap and she feels her nails dig into the skin of her palms. “They would be o-okay right now i-if I had and..” She starts to ramble. Tripping over her words and letting the guilt eat at her mind.

”It’s all my fault, Mark.” She says barely above a whisper, finally looking the other in the eye. “It’s all my fault.” She begins to weep, wishing that she could just curl up into a ball and disappear.