mudkarp - Tumblr blog

[mudkarp]

Dogs have had many jobs throughout history, in this case: Revenge.

[mudkarp]

[guy who doesnt watch shows voice] yeah ive been meaning to watch that show

[mudkarp]

[mudkarp]

i thinkit would be cool if there was an omegaverse but for salmon instead of wolves. Like when the time comes certain members of society get really juicy musclewise and get yiffy fangs and are suddenly compelled to return to the neighborhood they grew up in and 96 hours later show up barefoot in full starvation mode and ravaged by walking through interstate traffic to fuck whoevwr smells the best in the local burger king. Then afterwards they die and disintegrate to be eaten by seagulls in the parking lot

[mudkarp]

Yeah my name is Tim, short for OpTIMus Prime

[mudkarp]

i wish i was  abigfoot scientist making bigfoot bucks being interviewed on netflix documentaries about disappearances in americas national parks (bigfoots done it)

[mudkarp]

surviving the current age of internet means saying no to subscriptions and premiums for basic features. you must endure the inconvenience of not being able to use every server emoji in discord. you must build the patience to find alternatives like NewPipe so you can listen to music on youtube while your phone screen sleeps. do Not give these corporations your limited disposable income. tiktok not letting me view videos on my phone without downloading the app? i will outlast tiktok and the execs will be remembered as dull,disgusting capitalists. listen to me, listen to me. if you do not know how to pirate shows from hulu, learn. if you can't pirate it, it is not worth the money to rent it. please i'm on my hands and knees. do not accept this form of internet.

[mudkarp]

[mudkarp]

mutual just posted "ok i'm normal now". objective: survive their reverse-chronological dashboard breakdown (wave 1 of 30)

[mudkarp]

olympic gold in hitting christian babies with a bat

[mudkarp]

if you’re not ending your emails with “kill me! your slave and enemy,” then what are you doing with your life

[mudkarp]

House of Atreus Bhaal

Jan Kott, Hamlet and Orestes, tr. Bolesław Taborski / Aeschylus, Agamemnon, tr. Anne Carson / Tracy K. Smith, Ash / Ana Mendieta, Body Tracks / Adriana Varejão, Green Tilework in Live Flesh / Richard Wagner, Persifal, produced by François Girard / @filmnoirsbian, Why Am I Haunted? / @filmnoirsbian, [6 ways to draw a circle on wikihow] / @jrgdrawing-real / Richard Siken, Real Estate

[mudkarp]

need a polite way to say "im not engaging in a discussion on this topic with you because the conclusions you have reached are based on so many interwoven layers of misconceptions it would be easier to just like, hard reset your whole brain, just start over as a baby and try again"

[mudkarp]

I'm obsessed with this tweet

[mudkarp]

Gertrude Cordovana, an Italian nun executed in 1724 for claiming to have had sex with god, a claim she refused to retract after twenty five years of imprisonment and torture.

Francesco Calcagno, an Italian friar executed in 1550 for being kinda atheist, mocking the church, and suggesting that Paul “condemned sodomy in his writings because he enjoyed the practice and wanted to keep it to himself”.

[mudkarp]

[mudkarp]

you: suck my dick me, an intellectual: inhale my richard