mushdoomed

[mushdoomed]

Hi tcc! It's been a while... in short, my tc recently died in a terrible accident, and I've been in a lot of pain.

I haven't been able to talk to anyone about it or even attend the funeral because I feared that I would say too much and reveal all of my messy feelings about my tc to the people who care about me. I fear their judgement, and I don't want their memory of the amazing person that my tc was to be tainted with the knowledge that some pathetic teenager felt like she had fallen in love with him.

I have considered deleting this blog. I'm just going to be abandoning it for now. This was fun and many of you have been so kind to me, but I can't go on with this anymore.

Thanks and goodbye

[mushdoomed]

just a girl who will either yap your ear off or go nonverbal

[mushdoomed]

I keep imagining just reading my book in the afternoon as I usually do. - but this time I'm either cuddled up to him or simply having him by my side, while we both do our hobbies.

Sometimes one of us will interrupt the cozy silence, to talk a little about what they're doing, and share some thoughts and feelings.

[mushdoomed]

I'd like to sleep in on Sundays, and wake up to see him grade papers in the corner of the room. Then I'd go make him tea and some breakfast.

I'd love to experience everyday life with him like that.

[mushdoomed]

I want to sleep with him, not even in a sexual way but to fall asleep in his arms and wake up next to him <3

[mushdoomed]

All I want right now is that you put your arms around me and hug me tightly

[mushdoomed]

For a little while I'll be like

"Wow, I really think that I'm getting over my tc and that I'm not madly in love with him anymore, and I really feel like I'm getting better!!!"

only for me to see him smile at me minutes later and then

T_T

[mushdoomed]

There is something special between us. I can feel it.

[mushdoomed]

I MISS HER RAGGSHSHSHHHHHHHH

[mushdoomed]

The chaos of life is so loud right now and I still think about him every day

[mushdoomed]

hey google how do i stop being in love with my teacher who legally cannot reciprocate my feelings

[mushdoomed]

Why cant I just like boys my age I don't wanna go through this it hurts

[mushdoomed]

you know school is kicking your ass when you can't even bring yourself to study for your tc's class

[mushdoomed]

we just want to make our tcs happy and smile and get them gifts and we remember the details they say because we care about them and we get concerned when they’re sick and we want to take care of them. like we would be great lovers i think we’re adorable.

[mushdoomed]

when someone brings up your tc in conversation and you have to be like "ah. yes. i like them a Normal Amount"

[mushdoomed]

having a tc is telling yourself you hate them and need to get over them one minute and then blushing over the smallest things the next

[mushdoomed]

Me?? Stealing her interests so that she likes me more??? Whaaa??? I would never!!!