myfunnyvalentinebean

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

Y'know, I've heard of gamer girls, but I've never heard of a "gamer guy." I wonder why not. Maybe it's because guys don't play videogames as much as girls do. I mean basically all girls are gamers.

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

i think the near-extinction of people making fun, deep and/or unique interactive text-based browser games, projects and stories is catastrophic to the internet. i'm talking pre-itch.io era, nothing against it.

there are a lot of fun ones listed here and here but for the most part, they were made years ago and are now a dying breed. i get why. there's no money in it. factoring in the cost of web hosting and servers, it probably costs money. it's just sad that it's a dying art form.

anyway, here's some of my favorite browser-based interactive projects and games, if you're into that kind of thing. 90% of them are on the lists that i linked above.

A Better World - create an alternate history timeline

Alter Ego - abandonware birth-to-death life simulator game

Seedship - text-based game about colonizing a new planet

Sandboxels or ThisIsSand - free-falling sand physics games

Little Alchemy 2 - combine various elements to make new ones

Infinite Craft - kind of the same as Little Alchemy

ZenGM - simulate sports

Tamajoji - browser-based tamagotchi

IFDB - interactive fiction database (text adventure games)

Written Realms - more text adventure games with a user interface

The Cafe & Diner - mystery game

The New Campaign Trail - US presidential campaign game

Money Simulator - simulate financial decisions

Genesis - text-based adventure/fantasy game

Level 13 - text-based science fiction adventure game

Miniconomy - player driven economy game

Checkbox Olympics - games involving clicking checkboxes

BrantSteele.net - game show and Hunger Games simulators

Murder Games - fight to the death simulator by Orteil

Cookie Clicker - different but felt weird not including it. by Orteil.

if you're ever thinking about making a niche project that only a select number of individuals will be nerdy enough to enjoy, keep in mind i've been playing some of these games off and on for 20~ years (Alter Ego, for example). quite literally a lifetime of replayability.

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

you can start anytime.

you can brush your teeth in the middle of the day. you can wash the dishes at 2am. you can do things outside the normal times assigned by society.

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

my mum has severe knee problems and needs a replacement. Today she was told she's too fat to be operated on and the knee specialist suggested she gets a gastric band - which also involves surgery. So my mum was like first of all you didn't read my file because it explains that I'm not fat because I eat too much second of all you said it's impossible for me to get surgery and then suggested I get a surgery about it? He then asked her her weight and height, didn't believe her answer, and made her prove it to him because she "looks fatter than that". So she was like so you also just entirely based this on looks instead of actual numbers?

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

people will see a fictional guy who hates himself and hates everything associated with being a man and who has denied himself every pleasure in life and whose character arc is all about feeling trapped and stuck in a role he doesn't want but doesn't realize yet he can break free of and who isn't given autonomy to make his own decisions (either by himself or by others), and then headcanon them as transmasc instead of transfem

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

I get real "I'm at soup" vibes from some media crit

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

part of the reason i hate the toothpaste flag so much is bc i was a part of the lesbian community in the 2010s during that transition period where we were stopping use of the lipstick lesbian flag which was made by a racist transphobe, but we hadn’t yet adopted use of emily gwen’s flag, and it was SO hard for people to come to a consensus on what would be a good lesbian flag, there were dozens of designs that people were using, i specifically remember having one with like, a purple, yellow, pink and green stripe in my pfp for a bit, until finally gwen’s flag became the definitive lesbian flag (donate to gwen by the way) and even then gwen received accusations of being aphobic (they aren’t) or being transphobic/transmisogynistic (they aren’t) and the fact that they still have to frequently beg for donations because they live in poverty while massive corporations profit off her design, it’s just such a sad situation for gwen

and then some misogynistic prick saw her flag, thought “i am uncomfortable when we are not about me???” and ripped off her design but made it blue because pink is for girls and blue is for boys and unlike the amount of time and discussion that came from the lesbian community trying to decide what lesbian flag design to adopt, young gay men immediately latched onto this new flag like “oh thank goodness finally a flag to represent us because gay men have never had a flag to represent them before”

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

I'll be hosting my own kinktober, where the only thing allowed is two characters asking each other for consent to watch paint dry

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

⚠︎ ! your body has kept the score.

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

“should tumblr have a cut off age” i think we should be recruiting from nursing homes and senior citizen centers actually

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

yeah actually we removed the big bad wolf from the little red riding hood story because portraying violence against minors is really messed up. yeah. yeah also the wolf narrative was really predatory and had had some icky grooming vibes and a fable meant for literal children shouldn’t have implied p*do shit and grape so now little red riding hood goes into the woods and nothing happens and she goes to grandma’s house. don’t worry our kids will still stick to the path and know not to follow to wolves implicitly because we told them to and children should always do as their told. just like little red riding hood does now.

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

Ew gross. Get out of here you nasty misandrist piece of shit. Go spread your hatred somewhere else.

you don't know how happy this ask just made me

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

AUGUST IS OVER??????

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

girlies on youtube trying to paint labubu's as a figurehead of overconsumption when funko pops are right there with 30 million worth of their products in landfills

[myfunnyvalentinebean]

Men will literally attempt to reshape the world in their image by committing mass murder with a magic notebook instead of going to therapy.