mysonthinksimadweeb-blog

[mysonthinksimadweeb-blog]

Is a working for family worth it?

The title says it all.  Over five years ago I left a different career (one that required an advance degree) to join a family business.  The driving factors were wanting to please my father and brother-in-law (yup the one referenced in prior post who is now engaged and living with my ex-wife).  

Fast forward five years, bro-in-law obviously out of the picture.  Father and  I are incompatible to work together with very different leadership personalities.  Not only, but he doesn’t believe I work enough (yes I do need to work from home some to care for kids), undermines my role and generally shares with anyone who will listen how little I contribute to the organization.  For whatever it’s worth his views are unique - as in everybody else believes the opposite.  It’s not worth much when the person spewing this (mis)information is your father.

My question today is ... is this worth it?  I have to be honest and take responsibility for my own actions.  Nobody forced me to join the company.  Nobody is making me stay with them despite the toxic environment and the under-market pay.  So why do I??????

[mysonthinksimadweeb-blog]

Who am I?

I started this blog to offer my somewhat random musings.  It is a place for me to reflect, describe my self-pity and laugh at myself.  So without further introduction, who am I?

Well, first and foremost, I am a father of three wonderful young children ranging from 4 (twins) to 10 years old.  I’m employed by a business that I am also a part owner.  My favorite thing to do is spend time with my kids.  Pretty average stuff, huh?

Peel back a layer and I’m a single dad who only gets to be with his kids 50% of the time.  I did not chose this situation.  Does anyone really say “I do” in front of God, family and friends thinking that this is temporary and in about 12 years I’ll be blindsided by infidelity and the break-up of not only my marriage, but also my sister’s?  Me either but that’s what happened.  Sure I’d love to pretend it did not happen, but it did.  

I try not to be bitter and won’t let it define me.  (Remind me to comment on how I rediscovered myself post- divorce.)  I’ve learned to be honest with myself, however, and admit it hurts like hell and and nothing could have prepared me for this situation.  One of the crazy things is that after 3+ years (yeah, do the math with the age of my youngest children and see that this started very early in their lives), my ex and her now-fiance/former brother-in-law go out of their way to be a pain.

So, back to the original question... part of this reflective journey is to identify what is important and how I want to define myself.  I am 100% confident that my core values have not changed: (1) honesty (2) kindness toward others and myself and (3) bacon and whipped cream are essential on every grocery list.