nadimefe

[nadimefe]

Nadim, who met his cousin on the way out of his aunt and uncle’s house, asked the younger man to borrow the car which the other drove. The younger cousin who was aware of what happened saw the anger in Nadim’s face and decided that it wasn’t a good idea to let the older cousin drive. The cousin offered to drive Nadim to the other side of town to meet Zeynep’s parents.

Arriving at the destination, Nadim’s thoughts were sorted but the anger in his chest did not have time to calm down. He was at the door and as if they were waiting for him, his wife’s father opened the front door. It was still very dark outside as if it was the middle of the evening when it was closer to sunrise. Nadim did not mince words and said his piece to both his in-laws as his whole frame filled the doorway, towering over both of his wife’s abusers.

“How dare you put your hands on her!” His voice was low but firm; he had no intentions of making a scene but he wanted his point across. “Do not come near her again. If you even look at her with malice, I will not be so kind. I’m holding myself back for her sake and the sake of our marriage but there will be no next time,” he warned, leaving both of Zeynep’s parents speechless. They didn’t have a chance to appeal or weave their lies. His cousin asked if he was alright when he returned to the car, seeing the elderly’s faces in shock. He realized that he had his hands in fists the entire time. He didn’t know how he’d managed to control himself. Seeing Zeynep in such a situation brought back memories of his wife’s older sister in a very similar situation. Accused, abused. But he wasn’t going to let Zeynep go through what her sister had gone through. He was here now to protect Zeynep and for the first time in his life, he thanked their strict society that dictated his rights as a husband to have a say in his wife’s life. He was able to keep Zeynep away from her parents. If it meant forbidding them from seeing the young wife again, he would do it to protect her.

Arriving back at his aunt’s house with his cousin, he finally felt that fatigue that his body went through from hauling himself from Istanbul to London and going through such an emotional rollercoaster. But he knew it was nothing compared to what his wife had just experienced.

Quietly, they entered the household; his aunt and uncle retired in their room and his younger cousins as well. It will be morning soon. After telling his cousin thank you he headed to Zeynep’s room where he expected the young woman to be resting.

He carefully entered the bedroom expecting her to be asleep but he found her still wide awake.

“Zeynep,” he called her name in a silent tone, as if he was careful not to startle her. He stood by the doorway, waiting for her to let her in. Would she even want to be around him? He’d figure she’d want to be alone. “Can I come in?” He asked, his eyes wandering to what the young woman was doing, catching a glimpse of her notebook and pen. “Studying at this time of the night?” He commented, “You should -” He breathed out seeing the bruises on the woman’s face, “You should probably rest,” he continued, clenching his jaws, thinking of marching back to where his in-laws are staying to say more, do more. Make them understand that there will not be a next time. He will never let them do this to Zeynep again. 

Zeynep was very accustomed to the feeling of fear, but very rarely experienced it now as an adult. Since her childhood, living in a traditional home with a strict upbringing, fear of consequence was the driving force that prevented her from stepping out of line, dictating the way she acted and spoke and presented herself to the public. She had always tried to be a daughter that never disappointed or angered her parents; and she also tried to be a daughter her parents would forget about - a silent shadow, not drawing any attention to herself, almost like a ghost haunting her childhood home, for fear of being seen. Of being scrutinised, criticised. Targeted, like Gozde had been.

For years it had worked - Zeynep, as quiet as a mouse, letting herself blend into the tapestries on the walls instead of standing out against them. That changed when her parents married her off to Nadim and then again when she moved to London - the fear returned. She was front and centre, married to a man she knew only by extension, living in a country that spoke a language she barely understood, her young life in upheaval from such a massive change in circumstance. Over the years, she had become accustomed to her life. Nadim's family was kind; Nadim himself seemed a good man. He never touched her, and he always ensured she was provided for, even if they lived oceans away from each other. The fear subsided. Zeynep was happy in London. She grew confident; she studied hard; she made friends. She helped around the house, but was not expected to be confined to it as she might have back home. It was the best outcome she could have asked for, in her situation.

That all changed, when Zeynep was reunited with her parents, and it went beyond any of the fear she had experienced in her life; she was utterly petrified with fright, a small child again, trying to blend into the background but being forced into a spotlight where her character was degraded and her body was beaten by both mother and father despite her attempts to correct what they thought had happened in this house. Her in-laws knew who her friends were. She never hid that there was going to be mixed company in the house. They were fine with it - why weren't her parents understanding that?

The insults, the threats of what Nadim would do to punish her for her disgrace - they poisoned her mind, the words hurting just as much as the physical wounds, and the fear preventing her from being able to breathe.

Nadim's auntie and uncle were horrified at the scene in their home - Zeynep curled into a ball on the floor sobbing uncontrollably, her parents standing over her spouting abuse, their living room a mess of shattered glass. It took a while for the dust to settle; her auntie's frantic phone call, her uncle's firm voice convincing her parents to leave. Zeynep felt like she wasn't in her own body when her in-law's checked her wounds, cradling her in a way her parents hadn't done since she was a baby, calming her down until her sobs transformed into quiet, broken sniffles.

Zeynep's auntie coaxed her up from the floor, guiding her into the bathroom to wash up, rubbing the young woman's back in a soothing motion while she bent over the basin and let the cool water drip down her face. Already the skin was beginning to discolour and swell - yellow patches, along her cheek, across her left eye. It hurt when she accidentally touched too hard. Her auntie had gotten her a change of clothes - "something comfortable", she had said - and waited for her to finish changing before guiding her back to the living room couch.

"Nadim is on his way." Her in-law uncle said. Zeynep wondered if he announced it to calm her down - but then the crying started again. Her parents hadn't believed her when she tried to tell them she was innocent of their accusations. All she and her friends had done was study. All she and Mark did was high-five. It was common, it was normal. But they didn't see it that way. Would her husband share those sentiments? Would this be the moment where she was finally struck by his hand?

It was hours until Nadim arrived, and Zeynep didn't move from the couch, hunched over and hugging a blanket around her shivering form. Her auntie had made her tea and stayed by her side, stroking her hair and letting her cry, with the young woman lost in her own thoughts until she heard the heavy footsteps approaching.

"Zeynep?"

Zeynep glanced up, her throat seemingly closed up from responding. Her husband looked angry - that wasn't a good sign, not for her, and tears-welled in her red-rimmed eyes already. She was so scared, shaking beneath the blanket, the tea-cup in her hands rattling and its contents spilling over onto her hands.

She expected a similar reaction. She expected to be dragged by her hair. Disciplined, her parents would say. But instead, Nadim turned to his uncle, his anger seemingly not directed at his young wife.

"Look after her."

"We will - They're... You know where they stay..."

"I know. I will be back."

As quickly as he had appeared, Nadim was gone. Zeynep turned to her auntie, surprise painted across her weary face. "H-He's going to see them?" She asked in a small voice - so quiet, her in-law had to strain to hear her.

"Yes," Her auntie nodded, gently taking the tea-cup and setting it on the table. "Your husband is here now. He'll sort everything out with your parents."

"What if he doesn't believe me either?" Zeynep asked in a shaky voice.

"You'll have a chance to talk when he gets back," Her uncle said with a nod. "It's late. It won't be until later. Go upstairs and rest, Zeynep. You've had a long day."

"Come," Her auntie said, slipping her arm between Zeynep's and helping her off of the couch. "Try to sleep. You can talk to Nadim tomorrow."

Zeynep had no idea how she was going to sleep, after what she had just gone through. What was Nadim going to say to her parents? What were her parents going to say to him? Would there be a repeat of what happened today, tomorrow?

All these thoughts plagued her as Zeynep was escorted to her room. Her sanctuary. Her parents hadn't entered here, thank god. It was safe. She would be safe here.

"Sleep," Her auntie told her, guiding her to the bed. "Everything can wait until tomorrow."

"Thank you teyze," Zeynep said to her auntie, letting the woman give her a hug before leaving the room.

Alone, now. Zeynep was alone. The tears returned, as she sat curled up against the wall beneath her twinkling fairy lights. There was no way she'd be able to sleep, with fear plaguing her mind and worried thoughts rushing through her head. She had no idea what was going to happen when Nadim returned, or what would happen when she saw her parents again.

Reaching over to her desk, Zeynep picked up a pen and her book of poems. Writing was her escape - poetry was her voice when she was unable to speak. Opening up to a fresh page, she began to write. And if tear-drops tricked down and stained the paper, she didn't bother trying to wipe them away.

[nadimefe]

Timeline: 2025 April 12th, Saturday, nearly 2:00 A.M. in the morning. Location: Her in-law's house. Mood: Sad, scared D: Attire: See above D: She's also got some bruises on her face D: With: @nadimefe

It had been an awful night. Zeynep's parents were mad, refusing to listen to her attempts at explanation, expressing their disappointment towards her through loud shouting and physical violence. She had never been abused in this way before - but she had seen it happen to Gozde, and now truly understood what it felt like to be in her sister's shoes.

When Nadim's auntie and uncle returned home, most of the living room was in shambles and Zeynep was a crying mess. They immediately separated her parents from her, with the auntie removing Zeynep into another room while the uncle escorted the adults outside, trying to calm them down. Eventually Zeynep's parents left to a stay at a hotel, while Nadim's auntie called her nephew in a panic to tell him about what happened...

[nadimefe]

hands off

Timeline: 2025 April 12th, Saturday, nearly 2:00 A.M. in the morning. Location: Istanbul to London; his aunt and uncle's house. Mood: Enraged. Attire: See this post. He pissed. He's hot when he's pissed…. With: @thepreciouspoet

Nadim kept glancing at his wrist watch as if doing so would make a difference in the time the plane that was bringing him to London from Istanbul will land. He'd been anxious since he received the phone call from his aunt hours ago. Zeynep, she said in a hysterical voice, something that was unusual with his aunt, had been beaten by her parents. It - didn't register right away, what his relative on the other line was telling him. His young wife Zeynep being attacked by her parents?

"What do you mean?" His voice firm and the grip on the landline was made his knuckles turn white. His aunt's voice was panicked, sobbing, but eventually calmed down enough to tell him what went down. A visit from Zeynep's parents while his wife's in London, he wasn't aware of this.

"What was the reason behind them putting their hands on my wife?" His words barely passed through gritted teeth, his mother watched over, listening, clutching her chest. He nodded as his aunt further explained and after a few moments, he was bidding his mother goodbye.

"Nadim -"

"No worries, anne, I will be back right away. I'll bring her home," and rushed to the airport.

Thoughts ran through his head while he sat completely anxious, waiting for the moment he arrived in the city. Finally, the plane arrived and Nadim was impatient, grabbing the small bag he'd prepared for the travel. He was soon in a cab, heading to the neighborhood where his aunt lives with her family. It wasn't so long when he was here to visit his young wife. He did not expect to be back so soon and under such circumstances...

It was middle of the night but his relative was waiting for his arrival. The lights were on when he hopped off the taxi and he entered the dwelling without knocking.

"Zeynep?" Was his first word and right away, he was led into the family room where his young wife was sitting with his aunt, appearing so tiny, hunched, afraid, broken... He'd seen it before, the state that Zeynep was in was nothing unfamiliar... Her older sister used to go through the same ordeal.

"Look after her," he asked his uncle who had an apologetic look on his face.

"We will - They're... You know where they stay..."

"I know. I will be back," and headed back out, the bag he was carrying dropped carelessly by the doorway... He was to meet his in-laws; he had no intentions of waiting to confront them...

[nadimefe]

Timeline: 2025 April 12th, Saturday, nearly 2:00 A.M. in the morning. Location: Istanbul to London; his aunt and uncle's house. Mood: Enraged. Attire: See above. He pissed. He's hot when he's pissed.... With: @thepreciouspoet

After receiving a phone call from his aunt about the incident that occured, Nadim packed up a bag to head to London as soon as possible. His mother is very worried and so he explained that Zeynep had crossed their boundaries and did the unthinkable while Zeynep is undere his aunt's care. According to his aunt, Zeynep is badly hurt; Nadim's mother insists that she come along but Nadim assures her that he will take care of the young wife. Nadim is able to buy a ticket for a flight that is leaving right away to London. He wastes no time...

[nadimefe]

the slap

Timeline: 2025 April 11th, Friday, late afternoon. Location: Her in-law's home in London. Mood: Happy, relaxed, focussed Attire: See this post. Nothing too fancy - but not an attire certain people might be happy about... With: Her university friends; Ayesha, Mark, and Liam

It was a pleasant afternoon at Zeynep's in-law's home. She and her friends, Ayesha, Mark, and Liam, had been at university for their classes since the early hours of the morning. They attended their lectures, gone to their classes, and had studied a little before grabbing a bite to eat. The university library had become like a second residence for the group, who had booked a study room every day to work on their assigned project - but with final exams coming up and more and more frazzled students desperately trying to get some last-minute studying in, the library had become too crowded. Getting their own study room was hard too, as they were constantly booked out. They decided they needed a more private location if they were going to work on their project.

Zeynep had offered her home. It was quiet and spacious, as well as close to the university, so travel wouldn't be a problem. Out of respect she had of course checked with her in-laws that it would be okay first, still somewhat a guest in their home despite the years she had been living there. They were happy with it, even telling Zeynep to let them know in advance when her friends would be over so that they could leave and give them privacy to work.

Currently, the four were finalising their project and adding in the finishing touches, well ahead of the due date next week. They were sitting on the carpeted floor of Zeynep's living room around the coffee table, focussed on their scribbled in textbooks and the presentation slides on their laptops. Zeynep had laid out a spread of snacks and had made Turkish coffee, contributing to her share of the project while laughing with her friends.

"Alright, we are done," Mark said happily, hitting the 'save' button on their shared presentation.

"Finally," Ayesha yawned, stretching her arms and letting out a happy sigh when the tension released from her back. "Now all we have to do is focus on exams."

"Argh, don't say that word," Liam groaned. "We just finished work and you want us to think about even more?"

Zeynep chuckled as she and her friends started packing away their things. "It's okay, we'll have semester break right after. Just a few more weeks of hard work, and then we can relax."

"That's right," Ayesha smiled. "And of course we'll get to meet up in the break, before Zeynep travels back to Turkiye."

"When are you going?" Mark asked, turning towards the girl.

"At the end of the month. I'm going to visit for my nephew's birthday, stay for about a week, and then come back." Zeynep told them. This had been the plan she had made with Nadim - she still had a year of studies to go and as per his wishes she'd be coming back to London and finishing them up. She still was unsure about what the future held after that.

"Sounds nice to see your family! I hope you have a good trip," Liam told her, getting up from the ground and grabbing his bag. "I've got to go. Football training. Anyone need a lift?"

The group chatted as they packed their items away, with Zeynep assuring her friends to leave all the dishes the way they were because she'd tidy up after. They thanked her for hosting them and started off towards the front door - Liam and Ayesha were a little ahead, bickering about the football teams they supported, while Mark and Zeynep followed behind, laughing quietly at their friend's never-ending rivalry.

"They should just date already," Mark whispered to Zeynep, whose lips curled into an amused smile.

"Give them time," Zeynep told him. The two were quite close, keeping their voices down so their friends didn't hear. "It'll happen naturally when the time is right."

"I suppose you're the expert since you're the only one of us in a relationship," Mark laughed. "How did it happen for you? You never told us."

Zeynep felt her heart clench. It was no secret to her friends that she was in a relationship, but she hadn't revealed the details about the nature of her marriage to them. They had always wanted to meet her "boyfriend", curious about him, asking to see photos - but she rarely shared anything with them other than his name and the fact that he was always "away" on business. "That's a story for another time," Zeynep told Mark, the smile on her face now slightly forced. "Promise."

"Ah, you always say that!" Mark joked as they exited the house, lightly bumping her arm. "So secretive! Is he a spy or something?"

"Hmm maybe," Zeynep teased back, letting him nudge her repeatedly until Liam called from up ahead.

"Hey Mark! We'll leave you behind if you're going to be that slow!"

"Coming!" Mark turned towards Zeynep, raising his hand to give the other a high-five. She smiled, returning the gesture, glad that Mark was respecting her boundaries of touching and hugging. "Thanks again for letting us come over! See you next week!"

"See you. Bye guys!" Zeynep waved to all of her friends, watching as they hopped into Liam's car. She turned, about to go up the steps back into her in-law's house, when someone shouted her name from the street.

"ZEYNEP!"

The girl's eyes widened. The voice Zeynep heard was not a happy one. it was one reminiscent of her childhood, filled with anger, that instantly filled her with a feeling she hadn't had in a long time - dread. Impending doom. When she expected that something unpleasant was about to happen, and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

Turning, Zeynep saw her parents storming down the street. A taxi had been parked at the kerb, but she hadn't thought much of it when saying goodbye to her friends, not expecting anyone to come over. She had no idea that inside the cab, her parents had been sitting there, having just arrived at the same moment Zeynep had been saying goodbye to her friends. As soon as Liam's car was gone, they exited, calling out to the girl who had had no idea that they were coming. Her parents had never visited her one since she arrived in London.

"Anne, Baba," Zeynep said with surprise, watching as her parents drew closer with unhappy looks over their faces. Why? What reason did they have to be so upset? This was the first time she had seen them in years, and even though they weren't very close shouldn't it be a happy family reunion-

SLAP!

Zeynep's head snapped to side when her father's hand collided hard with her cheek, making her cry out from the pain and stumble to the side, almost falling on the floor of the veranda. Tears instantly bloomed in her eyes from the contact, as her mother started shouting.

At her. Not at Zeynep's father, who had just laid a hand on her. She was shouting at Zeynep.

"What kind of wife are you!?" The woman screamed in Turkish, pointing at her daughter. "Wearing such revealing clothing and allowing strange men in your house you share with your husband and his family!"

"A-anne, no," Zeynep cried back, reaching up to cradle her stinging. "T-they're my friends, we were just studying! I promise!"

"Do you think we were born yesterday! You can study in a library, what was he doing in your home! Why do you let him touch you!? Does your husband know about this!?" Her father's booming voice caused Zeynep's heard to leap into her throat, her body trembling with fear from the accusations and the way his hand was reaching up for another hit.

"I never raised my daughters to be such sluts," Her mother lamented with a cry, holding the straps of her handbag and whacking Zeynep with it again and again. "Both of them! Both my daughters are sluts!"

"A-anne, baba, stop!" Zeynep pleaded.

"Get inside!" Her father shouted, grabbing Zeynep by the hair and shoving her into the doorway. She stumbled in, her parents following after her, where a whole other set of issues ensued. She had yet to tidy up the living room since her friends had only just left, so there were empty coffee glasses on the table and crumbs that needed to be swept up. Zeynep planned on cleaning straight after they left - but unfortunately, in her parent's eyes, this was just another example of how much of a failed daughter she was. They shouted at her again, her father lifting one of the glasses and throwing it onto the floor where it shattered into pieces at her feet, while her mother continued beating her with her handbag. The two ignored Zeynep's cries and pleas to stop, the shouting heard from outside by the concerned taxi driver and Nadim's family, who were arriving home...

[nadimefe]

Timeline: 2025 April 11th, Friday, late afternoon. Location: Her in-law's home in London. Mood: Happy, relaxed, focussed Attire: See above. Nothing too fancy - but not an attire certain people might be happy about... With: Her university friends; Ayesha, Mark, and Liam

Zeynep has been studying hard, having had an increase in workload due to being in her final year at university. For one of her classes, a group project has been assigned. She and her friends Ayesha, Mark, and Liam are working together for the assignment, and it's been going well. They usually meet up at the university library, but today decided to go out for lunch after their classes and then continue their work in a different environment. Zeynep asks permission from Nadim's family to invite them over and they allow it, even organising to leave the house for a few hours so that the group can have a quiet space to study.

[nadimefe]

Zeynep held her sister's letters close to her chest, eager to open them up and read their contents. Over the years, communicating with her family in Turkiye had become easier with developments in technology, but there was something so much more special about receiving a hand-written, heart-felt letter. Zeynep loved keeping such an outdated tradition alive, and she knew it was relaxing for Gozde too. At the very least, it was a break in her schedule of being a busy mother and chasing around after her children.

Nadim finished setting up his sleeping arrangements for the night, gathering some of his clothes from his suitcase while speaking to her.

“Of course. The light won’t bother me. You know I’d fall asleep in an instant anyway.”

Zeynep smiled. It was hard to tell in the dark, but judging by the fact that she rarely ever heard movement coming from Nadim in the night when he slept on her floor, she believed it to be true. At the very least, he never was awake enough to try joining her on the bed. A blessing, in her eyes.

“Washing up real quick.”

The younger girl nodded, watching as her husband walked out of the room. Zeynep was already in her sleep clothes - a long pair of flannel pants and an oversized dark t-shirt - and had already brushed her teeth after dinner, so she was ready for bed. Her long hair was loose, hanging off of her shoulders and cascading down her back, the longest it's ever been since she took care of maintaining it. Zeynep was given money by her husband, but she didn't like using it unless it was an emergency. In fact, most of it had gone straight into a savings account, accruing interest, kept in the back of her mind for a rainy day. Instead, she used the money she earned from her job at the local public library to pay for cosmetics - things like make-up and hair-care and nail polish. Even then she'd try to get them at discounted prices. Living in poverty for so much of her life in Turkiye had her worrying immensely about money, so she tried to be smart about what she spent it on. The decorations in her room was evidence of that too - all thrifted, or bought at garage sales, for a couple of dollars a piece. Nothing too expensive - she was mindful about her purchases.

Curling up onto her bed beneath the window, Zeynep began sifting through the letters. They were dated and signed in Gozde's cursive script, and Zeynep started opening the oldest one, ready to read up about her sister's life, and the details that may have been overlooked in their hasty conversations over the phone. In the early days, they hadn't been able to communicate much at all. Gozde's husband had been incredibly controlling, not always permitting his wife to use the phone, stressing the importance of her attending to their children instead. Gozde wasn't Zeynep's family when her sister's husband was around - he made that abundantly clear.

So Zeynep read the letters one by one, beneath the faint glow of the fairy lights, sitting cross-legged on her bed. Each started the same - Dearest Zeynep - and ended with her sister telling her she loved her so very much. It almost made the younger girl want to cry, an ache in her chest as it hit her just how far her sister was from her. It wasn't as though Zeynep could hop onto a plane and travel back to see her either, with her demanding studies and her work, and she was reminding in that moment just how long they had been separated from each other because of their life situations.

She wanted to see her sister again soon.

Gozde detailed in one letter about how her youngest son would be having a birthday soon. As Zeynep read about how her sister wanted her to be there, there was a knock on the door. The younger woman glanced over, knowing it was her husband, who opened it up and entered, now dressed in a more relaxed outfit. It was a rare sight - Nadim was always dressed so well, his hair always styled and his beard always neat. He was a handsome man, Zeynep knew this, and it transferred over when he was in his sleep clothes as well.

Her husband settled onto his make-shift bed just as Zeynep finished reading the final letter. She carefully slotted the paper back in the envelope, reaching over to her bedside draw and placing them inside a box, one she specifically had for her sister's letters. She'd write to her tomorrow, and give Nadim the envelopes to pass onto her when he travelled back to Turkiye.

Nadim's voice broke the comfortable silence of the room.

“You’re graduating soon. Are you finding your last years in uni difficult?”

Her husband may not be able to see it from where he lay on the floor - since Zeynep was on the bed - but her eyes lit up again as she fondly thought about her education. "It's definitely more intense," She told Nadim. She was in her final year and the showed - she had textbooks on her desk, filled with pages for her to read before each of her lectures and tutorials, and had already gone through a few notepads with her study notes and essay-plans. "But it's not too difficult yet. Just a lot of extra reading, which I have to do before every class. But you know me... I love to read." Zeynep told him. This was a truth everybody she lived with knew too. She was rarely ever spotted without a book tucked under her arm, either reading for educational purposes or for pleasure.

“Do you want to stay here? After uni? Work here if you’d like?”

Zeynep hummed, leaning against the wall whilst sitting cross-legged on her bed, gazing out of her window. The stars were already out, faint bright dots that broke up the monotony of the night. She watched them, thinking about Nadim's question. Was it a trick question? Wasn't she expected to go back home after university and fulfil her duties as a housewife instead? Nadim had always encouraged her to study hard, but she still wasn't sure why, especially when she had been brought up with the notion that it wouldn't amount to anything once she was married. Zeynep had even been allowed to pick what she would study, subjects that most of the people in her village would probably deem inappropriate for a young woman, like philosophy, criminology, law. Nadim never said a word about it though. Just allowed her to do as she liked.

"I... I don't know," Zeynep answered, erring on the side of caution. "I like it here a lot. London is nice and there will be jobs available for me here when I graduate. It just... as lovely as London is, it doesn't have Gozde here. That's the only reason I'd want to go back. It's hard being so far from my sister..." She sighed, admitting the truth.

“Anyway, it Can’s birthday next month. Your sister wanted to know if you’re able to come home for the party… I’m sure she asked you already, but she also told me to ask…”

Zeynep smiled, peering over the edge of her bed to look at her husband. "Yes, she wrote about it in her letter. I'd love to attend!" She told Nadim excitedly, thinking it would be the first time in years since she had gone home. "Perfect timing, too. I have a few exams in the next two weeks, but next month will be more relaxed at university." She said before relaxing back in her bed. Nadim was laying down, and it was getting late so they should probably sleep. They had had a big day - Nadim with his travels and Zeynep preparing the house and the meals he would eat.

Zeynep shifted in her bed, deciding to get comfortable beneath the covers. She rested her head on the pillow, reaching for the switch for her fairly lights to flick them off, plunging the room into darkness. There was some light, from the window, but it would be easier for the two of them to sleep this way.

"How is my sister?" Zeynep spoke up after a while, hoping her husband wasn't asleep yet. "I worry that she doesn't tell me everything in her letters, because she doesn't want me to worry about her while I'm studying. But you would know, since you see her when you're in Turkiye right?" She asked. "Is she well? Are her children well?" Zeynep always asked Nadim about Gozde and her children, with questions about her parents usually following. Actually, she typically asked Nadim about his mother and siblings before inquiring about her own parents. They were never her priority. She loved them, but from a distance. And the longer she stayed in London and witnessed how loving and accepting families could be of the dreams of their children, the more she felt like they weren’t truly ‘parents’ to her and Gozde. “And how is your family? I cannot wait to eat the sweets your mother made for me. Please thank her. I hope she is in good health.”

[nadimefe]

Nadim caught sight of letters his wife opened while sitting on the bed. He was sure they were from the young woman’s older sister. He was aware how much the two women enjoyed writing letters to each other. It was hard at one point to communicate with Zeynep for Gozde. The older sister’s husband was strict and controlling. He knew it was a gamble each time Gozde contacted him. It was a risk and whenever Gozde did it, he responded. He knew the hoops Gozde had to jump to get through him and so he made sure he was always there for his old friend.

At one point, his mother asked him if he still had feelings for Gozde and he admitted that he cared for the woman and that somehow, he blamed his circumstances that she ended up in her situation. His mother of course told him it wasn’t his fault and that he tried his best. Now that he had money that he wished he had then, he made sure that he could at least help Gozde in ways he couldn’t before. One of which ismaking sure that the sisters stay connected. He wondered if Zeynep would one day want to go back home to the village to live with her sister?

"It's definitely more intense." 

He heard Zeynep respond to his question about university. He’s very proud of her achievements, moving to a different country to study, living with practically strangers.. Despite him setting everything up and making sure that she was supported financially and morally, she was there without the people she was familiar with.

"But it's not too difficult yet. Just a lot of extra reading, which I have to do before every class. But you know me... I love to read." 

He hummed at her response, “I know you do,” he remembered when she first came to live with him and his mother, his mother would come to him when he gets home at night from work telling him to buy books about things Zeynep was interested in. He did but he  didn’t always get it right. His mother was not educated; she got married young and had children young and spent her life supporting them. But she was patient and the greatest mother. She took her time to know what was appropriate for Zeynep and made sure they had it at home. Nadim knew his mother was not perfect and to a degree, he was aware that she expected Zeynep to be a “traditional wife.” Nadim made it clear that he wanted his wife to finish school and stressed it out to his mother who eventually started realizing it and went along with it. HIs mother did not know the real reason behind his marriage with Zeynep. She had the impression that when Zeynep came home from her studies in London, that she’d take over the house and take care of the family. He was going to break his mother’s heart but he knew she’d understand.

But before he could break the news to his mother about his true relationship with Zeynep, he would have to tell Zeynep first. 

"I... I don't know. I like it here a lot. London is nice and there will be jobs available for me here when I graduate. It just... as lovely as London is, it doesn't have Gozde here. That's the only reason I'd want to go back. It's hard being so far from my sister..." 

Nadim didn’t have to say anything about the young woman’s comment. He knew the sisters were close and if Zeynep would like to go back to the village…

“You can decide when it’s time. You’ll let me know when you figure it out,” he said. 

“Yes, she wrote about it in her letter. I'd love to attend! Perfect timing, too. I have a few exams in the next two weeks, but next month will be more relaxed at university."

He heard Zeynep shift in her bed, “I’ll come and pick you up then. And if I’m not available, I’ll have my aunt accompany you back to Istanbul. Is that alright?”

"How is my sister? I worry that she doesn't tell me everything in her letters, because she doesn't want me to worry about her while I'm studying. But you would know, since you see her when you're in Turkiye right? Is she well? Are her children well? And how is your family? I cannot wait to eat the sweets your mother made for me. Please thank her. I hope she is in good health.”

“Your sister is doing well. I do see her when I go to the village. And if I can’t go, anne (mother) goes and she makes sure to check on her and the kids… It’s been tough financially since your brother–in-law passed away but she said she’s happy just being with the kids…” He responded, not revealing that he’d been supporting Gozde and the kids. The deceased husband’s family wasn’t much help although they said they’d care for the kids. They first had a problem with Nadim providing for the family but Nadim was determined; he made it known that Gozde and the kids are family and that there was nothing wrong with helping the family. The rumours and gossip mostly stopped then. There were still people who would whisper things like Gozde is having an affair with him. He made sure to confront people if he heard them spread lies first hand. Zeynep need not be bothered by these issues. “She and the kids will be happy to see you… And anne’s doing well. Going on her usual medical check-ups. She wanted to come and see you but she had appointments at the moment. I’ll tell her to make you more when I get home.”

There was a pause then and he wondered if he talked too much and if Zeynep fell asleep. “You must be tired. We’ll talk again tomorrow. It’s Saturday. I thought maybe we can go out to buy you what you need. I don’t go home until Tuesday. I have some business in the city,” he said anyway, in case she was still up. He pulled his blanket up to his chest, preparing to fall asleep, thinking of where to take her tomorrow if she wasn’t busy… 

Zeynep held her sister's letters close to her chest, eager to open them up and read their contents. Over the years, communicating with her family in Turkiye had become easier with developments in technology, but there was something so much more special about receiving a hand-written, heart-felt letter. Zeynep loved keeping such an outdated tradition alive, and she knew it was relaxing for Gozde too. At the very least, it was a break in her schedule of being a busy mother and chasing around after her children.

Nadim finished setting up his sleeping arrangements for the night, gathering some of his clothes from his suitcase while speaking to her.

“Of course. The light won’t bother me. You know I’d fall asleep in an instant anyway.”

Zeynep smiled. It was hard to tell in the dark, but judging by the fact that she rarely ever heard movement coming from Nadim in the night when he slept on her floor, she believed it to be true. At the very least, he never was awake enough to try joining her on the bed. A blessing, in her eyes.

“Washing up real quick.”

The younger girl nodded, watching as her husband walked out of the room. Zeynep was already in her sleep clothes - a long pair of flannel pants and an oversized dark t-shirt - and had already brushed her teeth after dinner, so she was ready for bed. Her long hair was loose, hanging off of her shoulders and cascading down her back, the longest it's ever been since she took care of maintaining it. Zeynep was given money by her husband, but she didn't like using it unless it was an emergency. In fact, most of it had gone straight into a savings account, accruing interest, kept in the back of her mind for a rainy day. Instead, she used the money she earned from her job at the local public library to pay for cosmetics - things like make-up and hair-care and nail polish. Even then she'd try to get them at discounted prices. Living in poverty for so much of her life in Turkiye had her worrying immensely about money, so she tried to be smart about what she spent it on. The decorations in her room was evidence of that too - all thrifted, or bought at garage sales, for a couple of dollars a piece. Nothing too expensive - she was mindful about her purchases.

Curling up onto her bed beneath the window, Zeynep began sifting through the letters. They were dated and signed in Gozde's cursive script, and Zeynep started opening the oldest one, ready to read up about her sister's life, and the details that may have been overlooked in their hasty conversations over the phone. In the early days, they hadn't been able to communicate much at all. Gozde's husband had been incredibly controlling, not always permitting his wife to use the phone, stressing the importance of her attending to their children instead. Gozde wasn't Zeynep's family when her sister's husband was around - he made that abundantly clear.

So Zeynep read the letters one by one, beneath the faint glow of the fairy lights, sitting cross-legged on her bed. Each started the same - Dearest Zeynep - and ended with her sister telling her she loved her so very much. It almost made the younger girl want to cry, an ache in her chest as it hit her just how far her sister was from her. It wasn't as though Zeynep could hop onto a plane and travel back to see her either, with her demanding studies and her work, and she was reminding in that moment just how long they had been separated from each other because of their life situations.

She wanted to see her sister again soon.

Gozde detailed in one letter about how her youngest son would be having a birthday soon. As Zeynep read about how her sister wanted her to be there, there was a knock on the door. The younger woman glanced over, knowing it was her husband, who opened it up and entered, now dressed in a more relaxed outfit. It was a rare sight - Nadim was always dressed so well, his hair always styled and his beard always neat. He was a handsome man, Zeynep knew this, and it transferred over when he was in his sleep clothes as well.

Her husband settled onto his make-shift bed just as Zeynep finished reading the final letter. She carefully slotted the paper back in the envelope, reaching over to her bedside draw and placing them inside a box, one she specifically had for her sister's letters. She'd write to her tomorrow, and give Nadim the envelopes to pass onto her when he travelled back to Turkiye.

Nadim's voice broke the comfortable silence of the room.

“You’re graduating soon. Are you finding your last years in uni difficult?”

Her husband may not be able to see it from where he lay on the floor - since Zeynep was on the bed - but her eyes lit up again as she fondly thought about her education. "It's definitely more intense," She told Nadim. She was in her final year and the showed - she had textbooks on her desk, filled with pages for her to read before each of her lectures and tutorials, and had already gone through a few notepads with her study notes and essay-plans. "But it's not too difficult yet. Just a lot of extra reading, which I have to do before every class. But you know me... I love to read." Zeynep told him. This was a truth everybody she lived with knew too. She was rarely ever spotted without a book tucked under her arm, either reading for educational purposes or for pleasure.

“Do you want to stay here? After uni? Work here if you’d like?”

Zeynep hummed, leaning against the wall whilst sitting cross-legged on her bed, gazing out of her window. The stars were already out, faint bright dots that broke up the monotony of the night. She watched them, thinking about Nadim's question. Was it a trick question? Wasn't she expected to go back home after university and fulfil her duties as a housewife instead? Nadim had always encouraged her to study hard, but she still wasn't sure why, especially when she had been brought up with the notion that it wouldn't amount to anything once she was married. Zeynep had even been allowed to pick what she would study, subjects that most of the people in her village would probably deem inappropriate for a young woman, like philosophy, criminology, law. Nadim never said a word about it though. Just allowed her to do as she liked.

"I... I don't know," Zeynep answered, erring on the side of caution. "I like it here a lot. London is nice and there will be jobs available for me here when I graduate. It just... as lovely as London is, it doesn't have Gozde here. That's the only reason I'd want to go back. It's hard being so far from my sister..." She sighed, admitting the truth.

“Anyway, it Can’s birthday next month. Your sister wanted to know if you’re able to come home for the party… I’m sure she asked you already, but she also told me to ask…”

Zeynep smiled, peering over the edge of her bed to look at her husband. "Yes, she wrote about it in her letter. I'd love to attend!" She told Nadim excitedly, thinking it would be the first time in years since she had gone home. "Perfect timing, too. I have a few exams in the next two weeks, but next month will be more relaxed at university." She said before relaxing back in her bed. Nadim was laying down, and it was getting late so they should probably sleep. They had had a big day - Nadim with his travels and Zeynep preparing the house and the meals he would eat.

Zeynep shifted in her bed, deciding to get comfortable beneath the covers. She rested her head on the pillow, reaching for the switch for her fairly lights to flick them off, plunging the room into darkness. There was some light, from the window, but it would be easier for the two of them to sleep this way.

"How is my sister?" Zeynep spoke up after a while, hoping her husband wasn't asleep yet. "I worry that she doesn't tell me everything in her letters, because she doesn't want me to worry about her while I'm studying. But you would know, since you see her when you're in Turkiye right?" She asked. "Is she well? Are her children well?" Zeynep always asked Nadim about Gozde and her children, with questions about her parents usually following. Actually, she typically asked Nadim about his mother and siblings before inquiring about her own parents. They were never her priority. She loved them, but from a distance. And the longer she stayed in London and witnessed how loving and accepting families could be of the dreams of their children, the more she felt like they weren’t truly ‘parents’ to her and Gozde. “And how is your family? I cannot wait to eat the sweets your mother made for me. Please thank her. I hope she is in good health.”

[nadimefe]

Nadim's mother's parents' house he renovated a couple of years ago. Four rooms, two baths, three floors. Beykoz, İstanbul, Türkiye.

[nadimefe]

Nadim nodded at Zeynep’s “teşekkür ederim,”  catching the young woman’s wide-eyed expression. His mother was right, Zeynep would like the treats everyone sent her. A lot of them are home made, like the sweets his mother made. Some were store bought. He wasn’t sure what was in the package Zeynep’s sister had packed but he wasn’t going to ask. He never interfered or meddled with Zeynep’s relationship with her older sister. He promised Gozde that he’d take good care of her younger sister and that he’d always allow them to communicate with each other… He was glad that through the women’s ordeal, both sisters were able to stay connected and he hoped that their bond would remain strong. 

Nadim paused from making his bed on the floor as he listened to Zeynep’s response to his question. The woman took studying seriously and he admired it. Zeynep was going to go far, no matter what she chooses to do in the future, he thought, re-folding the blanket he’d pulled out of the closet. He might have to sleep in the living room but he didn’t mind. He’d done it before and when his auntie asked the morning they found him downstairs sleeping on the couch instead of in Zeynep’s bedroom, he simply said he didn’t want to disturbed her studies and they accepted the explanation without any question. 

"No, no, that's okay. I'm not studying now, just writing a little before bed. We can switch off the main light - I have the small ones by the window, which will be enough for me to finish up with." 

His head automatically turned to the window where he saw the fairy lights hanging. He hummed an approval and continued making the bed on the floor. Once it was done, he grabbed a change of clothes from his small suitcase that was brought up by a cousin earlier when he arrived. He was going to wash up before bed although he’d rather lay down and fall asleep… The long trip was exhausting. But he was used to showering before bed and he never really liked laying on his clean mattress dirty -

"Is that alright with you? I won't keep them on for long - I just want to read Gozde's letters..."

Nadim looked up to catch Zeynep’s face as she asked the question. 

“Of course. The light won’t bother me. You know I’d fall asleep in an instant anyway,” he joked, although the last part of his comment wasn’t entirely true. Sure, the lights wouldn’t bother him but honestly, it wasn’t that easy for him to fall asleep at night. Could be stress, but most nights he stayed awake, thinking about his worries. 

“Washing up real quick,” he told her, proceeding to leave the room to head to the bathroom down the hallway. It didn’t take him long before he was walking back to the room. He still knocked the second time he was standing in front of Zeynep’s door however, this time, he didn’t wait for a reply. He quietly walked in, his hair down after he washed it and dried with a clean towel. He put on a  worn out white shirt and grey sweats to bed. He laid down after hanging the towel he used and from where he was laying, he had a clear view of the window where the fairy lights were hanging. He thought of what went through his head on his way to the bathroom… He wondered how Zeynep would find her bedroom in their house in Istanbul. He’d fixed up the house that belonged to his mother’s parents a long time ago. The house looked a little different now from how it was when Zeynep first lived there. Her room was bigger now, newly painted. He’d always made sure she had her own space in the house. His mother used to live with her and his younger siblings but after he married Zeynep, she moved with his siblings to another house that he’d bought for them. 

“Zeynep’s the woman of the house now. I’d visit during the day to help her around the house but she should learn how to manage the household without me being around,” his mother said to him when Zeynep came home with them. He didn’t comment on the idea but he thought it was better that way because then his mother wouldn’t question how he treated Zeynep around the house. She was more like a sibling who he encouraged to go to school and get a lot of rest. Of course, he did tell her to take care of the house but never ordered her around or made her feel that it was her duty to keep things in order. 

“You’re graduating soon,” he suddenly said, in his low voice, one arm placed under his head as he laid there, still, back flat on the mattress. “Are you finding your last years in uni difficult?” He always asked Zeynep about university. He learned from his aunt and uncle that his wife had good friends from class and sometimes they come over to have snacks and study with Zeynep. He ‘allowed’ it. Zeynep is young and should be doing things young people enjoy. Hanging out with friends. And maybe in the future, dating.

Her sister never had that opportunity. She was raising a family at a very early age. And what about him? Maybe to a degree he enjoyed his youth. He was privileged compared to Gozde and most young women from their village. Being a man although penniless had many advantages. He didn’t have to concern himself about being forced to marry at a young age although in a lot of cases, it did happen. Financial situation and pressure from society to conform forced many young people to leave school and work and start a family…

He did work a lot while he was young but that was his choice and he never regretted it. He wanted to provide for his family, wanted them to live comfortably and he achieved it through hard work.

“Do you want to stay here?” He then continued after a moment. “After uni? Work here if you’d like?” He supposed he was beginning to crack the glass where he’d placed Zeynep in. Little by little, he was going to prepare her for their inevitable separation. 

“Anyway,” he turned his head to look at her, “It Can’s birthday next month,” he referred to their youngest nephew, one of Gozde’s children. “Your sister wanted to know if you’re able to come home for the party… I’m sure she asked you already, but she also told me to ask…” 

"Merhaba."

Zeynep opened the door, permitting her husband entry into her room. It was late, and no doubt the rest of the family were asleep, so she shut it carefully behind her once Nadim was inside so as not to wake anyone up. She wasn't scared, per say, of being alone with Nadim. But she wasn't used to it. He visited infrequently, and even on nights like this where he joined her in her room during his stay in London, it was just so that he could sleep. They talked, sure. Zeynep asked him about her sister, her parents, his mother, his work - polite, safe topics of conversation. Nadim may be the husband she did not know, but during their years of marriage he had never once given her reason not to trust his word about updates from home.

“I wasn’t sure if you were still awake, but, here. There are things in there from your sister, too.”

Zeynep's eyes brightened at the bag in Nadim's hands. She graciously took it from him, very lightly brushing his hands with hers, with a small smile gracing her face. "Teşekkür ederim." She thanked him, opening it up slightly to take a peak inside, noticing the traditional sweets and treats that lay within that Nadim's family often sent with him when he visited for her. She could also spy a few unopened envelopes, and a box-shaped package wrapped in wrapping paper - those had to be from her sister. For a long time, hearing from Gozde was almost impossible. Her sister's husband ruled their household with fists and violence, a foreshadowing of what Zeynep was to expect from her own marriage had she been given to the man her parents had picked out for her before Nadim suddenly swooped in and asked for her hand. She didn't know what prompted this - in fact, she barely remembered Nadim, only knowing that he had been Gozde's close friend before her sister was wed and isolated from almost everyone she knew. Before Zeynep knew it, her parents had changed their mind about the initial suitor, giving her away to Nadim instead.

If she squinted, Zeynep could almost compare her story to those of the Western novels she had devoured after arriving to London, using them as a tool to develop her English and broaden her mind - except unlike the protagonists in those books, Zeynep wasn't confident she'd have the same happy ending. It depended on Nadim, and how he would treat her after her studies in London concluded. She wondered if he would rule his household the way Gozde's husband did, and whether this time Zeynep would be on the receiving end of that violence.

Trust me. Gozde had whispered those words to a teary, 15-year-old Zeynep right before the signing of her marriage papers. You may not trust in him yet, but trust me, sister. You will be safe.

“I’m gonna make the bed on the floor. I hope I’m not disturbing you? Are you studying?”

Zeyneb shifted her gaze from the bag to her husband. He was setting up a place to sleep on the floor, taking out the thin mattress and blankets that were kept folded in her closet and spreading them out a little ways away from her bed. She watched him as she set the bag down on her desk, curious as to his intentions. Nadim had every right to sleep beside her, in the bed. He had every right to lay his hands on her, if he so pleased, and had been given that right since the night they married - yet, seven years on, and he did not lay a finger on her. Small touches, here and there, nothing more than the brushing of hands, and never in the way that Zeynep had been most worried about since marrying him.

If her mother found out that she and her husband didn't even sleep in the same bed, would she be shocked? Perhaps she would think Zeynep was a bad wife. Zeynep would not be surprised if her mother and father already thought this of her - seven years of marriage, and she still had no child to show for it.

But Nadim wouldn't touch her, and Zeynep didn't tell a soul about their situation - except for Gozde. She couldn't keep anything from Gozde. Zeynep didn't understand why her husband was like this - but she did not question it, lest it change and she regret ever asking.

"I was studying, earlier. I have a paper to turn in next week and an exam shortly after." Zeynep explained, her voice fond as she talked about her schooling. Her classmates might groan and grumble about essays and tutorials and lectures - but Zeynep loved it all. It was experience she never thought she'd have. Who would have thought a girl like her would have the opportunity to go to university in London, let alone finish high school - and at the insistence of her husband, no less. She was grateful for Nadim in that regard - though, she wondered whether she would pay the price for it in some way. The thought was always there, in the back of Zeynep's mind.

You will be safe.

“I can sleep downstairs if you want me to?” 

He would. Zeynep knew he would. Nadim had in the past, when she was younger, without him even asking. But even though she didn't know him well enough to trust him as Gozde foretold, she did know that Nadim would remain on his makeshift bed the entire night.

"No, no, that's okay," Zeynep said, shaking her head. "I'm not studying now, just writing a little before bed. We can switch off the main light - I have the small ones by the window, which will be enough for me to finish up with." She told him, referring to the fairy lights she had hung up to decorate her room with. For a moment, Zeynep felt self-conscious of her room. Would Nadim also think it was baby-ish, that she enjoyed decorating like this? That most of her items were second-hand, thrifted, well-loved by a family once in the past before being passed down to someone who would love them as if they were new? It made her happy - and her happiness, Zeynep discovered in her time living here, was important. "Is that alright with you? I won't keep them on for long - I just want to read Gozde's letters..."

[nadimefe]

Listening to the movements inside the bedroom, Nadim held onto the bag of treats from back home. This was the usual first night of his visit with Zeynep. In the following minutes, there would be some adjustments. They haven’t seen each other in a few months and each time they meet again, it was like seeing one another for the very first time. At least that’s how Nadim felt… Each time he came to London to visit his wife, laying eyes on her made him see the young girl from seven years ago less and less and also even more in the same breath. Whenever he visited, he was reminded of how their marriage came about…

Zeynep is Gozde’s younger sister, his first love. In so many ways, his relationship with Gozde was pure. They met in school very early on. Both being born and raised in the same tiny coastal village, everyone knew everybody. They were in the same group of friends. They became close, confided in each other and to a degree, supported each other. When the news of Gozde getting married, Nadim was devastated. He asked, “How about school??” How about Gozde’s dreams?? None of those matters when the table was empty and everyone in the family was going about their day hungry. 

Nadim wanted to marry Gozde. He was going to leave school as well and work but even with his family’s business, he truly had nothing substantial to show Gozde’s family. And so, she was married off to an older man and not even a few months after, got pregnant with his child… 

Nadim could’ve lived in peace for Gozde, only if his first love had a happy ending. Daily he’d heard news of suffering and abuse and despite wanting to do something about it, he had to deal with his own tragedy as well. When his father passed away due to sudden illness, they were forced to close down the family business and move to Istanbul. After that, he completely lost contact with Gozde. Or should he say, he was forbidden to contact Gozde, even when they were still good friends. 

Years later, when the unexpected phone call from Gozde came, asking - begging him to save her younger sister Zeynep from the same fate, Nadim did not think twice. He traveled back to their village and offered his friend’s family a dowry they couldn’t 

refuse even though they already found a husband for then 15-year old Zeynep… There were doubts at first; what was his agenda? But anything could be erased by flashing money and title and Nadim, at this point, had both. 

Nadim saw Gozde in Zeynep the day he and his mother came to ask for Zeynep’s hand in marriage. In many ways the young girl was a reflection of his first love. But Zeynep was also very different and he recognized this very early on. Zeynep was quiet, a contrast to her sister who had a bubbly personality when they were in school. That had changed after years of being trapped in an unwanted life and relationship… Zeynep almost always spoke with her eyes… That day he wasn’t sure what he was seeing in the child’s gaze but he decided that on that very day, he wasn’t going to be Zeynep’s saviour. Rather, he was going to be Zeynep’s chance, a path to a different life. 

He cared for Zeynep in his own ways. He provided everything the young girl needed, food, housing, education, but most of all, freedom to do what made her happy. He encouraged finishing school and eventually attending university. For the longest, after the marriage, he worried that she saw him as someone who would take advantage of her. He never disclosed his conversation with Gozde to anybody. He kept it a secret. No one had to know why he married Zeynep. He often wondered if she ever thought why he never initiates any type of intimacy with her? He’d always seen her as a young sibling that needed to be guided -

The door to the bedroom opened, interrupting Nadim’s thoughts. 

"Hi Nadim. Did you want to come in?" 

Her soft voice sounded mature, no longer that of a timid girl. Did she also get a little taller? Even if she did, he still had to look down to see her face staring at him. 

“Merhaba,” he responded to her greeting, nodding his head as he carefully made his way inside the room. No, he never initiated any physical contact with Zeynep as their marriage was only on paper, although she might not know it now, she’ll learn it very soon. But still there were appearances that needed to be made. He didn’t want family members questioning the decisions he made for his ‘wife’ if he ever disclosed his true relationship with Zeynep to people close to him. Playing his part as a husband in many senses of the word was easier than explaining how things came about.

“I wasn’t sure if you were still awake, but,” he raised the bag that was packed by his mother for Zeynep. “Here. There are things in there from your sister, too,” he continued, taking his jacket off. He took an empty hanger from the closet and hung his jacket on one side of the closet. “I’m gonna make the bed on the floor,” like he usually did when he visited. “I hope I’m not disturbing you?” He turned to cast the tiny study a look, noticing an open notebook on top of it. “Are you studying?” He started making his bed on the hardwood floor, laying down the mat then a thin mattress followed by some blankets he took out from the closet as well. His steps and movements were quiet. Most people in the house were sleeping and he didn’t want to wake anyone up. “I can sleep downstairs if you want me to?” 

Timeline: 2025 March 21st, Friday, early evening. Location: London. Mood: Quiet, content, a bit nervous Attire: See this post. Such a cutie! With: @nadimefe

Quiet. That's how Zeynep was for the majority of the evening, when her husband, Nadim, arrived from Istanbul. She was polite, of course. Responded when spoken to, returned pleasant smiles with one of her own - but she was quiet. Why? She shouldn't have to be. When Nadim wasn't here, Zeynep was a little more outgoing than this. She'd laugh with her in-law's, make jokes, talk about her interests with passion burning in her speech. But with Nadim here, it was as though she was once again under the watchful eyes of her parents, waiting for her to give them a reason to dictate the rest of her life. They had done it once, when they forced her to wed the man ten years her senior. And even if Zeynep hadn't seen enough of him to be making such an unfair judgement - since she had been sent away to the UK to finish off her schooling - the mystery surrounding who he was made her... quiet. Observant. Wondering when the other shoe would drop, or the switch would flip, and she'd be in the same position her older sister was all those years ago.

Gozde told her to trust her, about the marriage. And Zeynep did. Though, at 15 years old, pushed into a hand-me-down wedding gown and heavily veiled so she could hardly see a step in front of her, she didn't have much of a choice.

He was here now. Had been sitting and eating with his family, talking to them about home. Funny. Zeynep wasn't sure how she felt about calling Turkiye her home anymore. Her heart was there - her sister - but what else? Everything Zeynep knew was here, in the UK. Her freedom, her choice, her studies, her friends - the UK was home, too, more than the one she had left.

The evening ended for her, and Zeynep slipped away. She had helped clear the table. Helped wash and dry the dishes. Brewed the Turkish coffee that reminded her of hot nights in summer at the souq back in Istanbul. And then she left, quietly, to her room, so that Nadim may spend the rest of his time with his family.

Zeynep's room was her sanctuary. Her in-law's didn't enter without her permission, and she decorated it with items she'd have never been allowed to purchase at home. Too baby-ish, her mother might say, of the soft and fluffy cushions and plushies that adorned her bed, of the lava lamp she had bought at a thrift shop, of the twinkling fairy lights that framed her window. Not the room of a married woman. But Zeynep loved it, and loved to decorate it with the changing of the seasons.

She wondered if she'd be allowed her own space, when she returned home to Turkiye. She quite liked having her own room.

Sitting at her desk and opening up her notebook, Zeynep clicked her pen and started writing on a new page. She love to write and the words flowed from her pen easily. She started jotting down a poem she titled A Sweet Farewell, about her worries of leaving the country she had grown to love so much.

A knock on the door interrupted her musings, as well as a voice calling her name. Zeynep glanced at her phone, noticing how late it had become - she had left Nadim with his family quite a while ago. Getting up, she closed her notebook and walked to the door, opening it up to reveal her husband standing on the other side. He was tall - so tall, she very much had to crane her neck to look up at him - and very well-dressed, even after having been on a long plane ride. His hair was longer than she remembered, beard a bit fuller. Her husband was handsome, had always been so. Perhaps she was lucky, in that regard. Not all arranged marriages ended up in the way hers had, with a husband who let her live as she pleased instead of forcing her to remain in his home and rear his children.

"Hi Nadim," Zeynep greeted softly. They hadn't really had a chance to speak together, since the gathering took precedence. She imagined that she'd be the same, caught up in speaking with her sister whenever she returned back home. "Did you want to come in?" She asked him softly.

[nadimefe]

the visit

Timeline: 2025 March 21st, Friday, early evening. Location: Istanbul to London. Mood: Quiet, focused. Hungry and a bit tired. Attire: See this post. Have this massive man, please. He gorgeous. With: @thepreciouspoet

Nadim arrived at his relatives' home just in time for dinner. He was brought in inside, welcomed and was happily seated after quickly washing up. He was in London to visit his young wife, Zeynep, who has been studying in the city for a few years now. She stayed with his late father's oldest sister and her family. They were loving and treated Nadim as their own and when Nadim reached out for help to house Zeynep while she attended university, they took her in without any questions asked.

During dinner, he foucused on his relatives who were happy to see him. He talked to them about news from back home and handed their packages from other relatives who'd packed foods and things that they don't usually buy easily in London.

Once most of the family members retired to bed, Nadim went ahead to find his young wife to deliver packages he brought for her from back home including gifts from his own mother and of course, from her sister. He walked up the second floor of the house, directly to the room he shared with her when he was in London.

He knocked on the door, "Zeynep," he quietly called out her name, wondering if she'd fallen asleep.

[nadimefe]

Some of the food and treats Nadim's mother packed for Zeynep and their relatives.

[nadimefe]

Timeline: 2025 March 21st, Friday, early evening. Location: Istanbul to London. Mood: Quiet, focused. Attire: See above. Have this massive man, please. He gorgeous. With: @thepreciouspoet

Nadim flies to London for his quarterly visit to his young wife, Zeynep who is currently living in England with his relatives. He brings her various food and treats from Istanbul, new clothes, and money for her allowance. Nadim will be staying for a week to take care of some business and make sure that Zeynep has everything she needs... Before leaving Turkey, Nadim visited the village to take whatever package Zeynep's sister wanted to send with him to deliver to Zeynep...

[nadimefe]

[nadimefe]

BASICS

FULL NAME: NADIM EFE

» MEANING: Nadim [ The Arabic name Nadim (نديم) means "friend," "confidant," "companion," or "drinking companion," and is a masculine name used across various communities in the Middle East, Balkans, and South Asia. ]; Efe [ The name "Efe" can have different meanings depending on its origin: in Turkish, it can mean "older brother" or "master," while in Nigerian culture, it's a shortened form of "Efetobore," meaning "wealth has now been achieved," or "wealth" in Urhobo. ]

VERSE:  404 Error

NICKNAME(S): Nadim

AGE: 33-years old.

DATE OF BIRTH: 1992 April 8th, Wednesday.

PLACE OF BIRTH: İnebolu, Kastamonu, Türkiye.

OCCUPATION: Businessman; Mechanical Engineer.

POWERS: Possess the traits, attributes and/or abilities of, transform into, or be/is a werewolf. Healing, slow aging, super-strength.

PERSONALITY

STRENGTHS: Courageous, Determined, Confident, Enthusiastic, Honest, Passionate.

WEAKNESSES: Impatient, Moody, Short-Tempered, Impulsive, Aggressive.

APPEARANCE

FACE CLAIM: Can Yaman.

HEIGHT: 6′2 ft. [188 cm.]

WEIGHT: 165 lbs. [75 kg.]

BUILD: Muscular.

GAIT: Relaxed.

HAIR COLOR: Brown.

EYE COLOR: Brown.

BIRTHMARK: TBA.

OVERVIEW: » SCARS: Some minor ones. » TATTOOS: Yes. TBA.

BACKGROUND

HOMETOWN: İnebolu, Kastamonu, Türkiye.

RESIDENCES: İnebolu, Kastamonu, Türkiye; Istanbul, Turkey. He travels to Europe and has a flat in London.

NATIONALITY: Turkish-British.

ETHNICITY: Albanian/Turkish.

FINANCIAL STATUS: Upper class. Nadim rebuilt his late father's once successful construction business. It went bankcrupt when the older Efe passed away. Nadim was able to bring it back from the bottom up through hardwork and his mother's savings and available government fundings.

EDUCATION LEVEL: University graduate.

DEGREES: Degree in Mechanical Engineering.

SPOKEN LANGUAGES: Nadim is fluent in Turkish, some Arabic. He speaks English as well as he also lived in England for a few years growing up.

RELATIONSHIPS

PARENTS: Elira [m.]; Agron [f., deceased]

SIBLINGS: Young siblings. Details to be added.

CHILDREN: None.

PETS: None.

SIGNIFICANT RELATIONSHIPS: » Nadim is married to Zeynep.

FAMILY HISTORY: Nadim was born in a small coatal village by the Black Sea in Turkey. He grew up with younger siblings and both parents in the picture. However, his father died when he was very young, sending their family in deep grief. It became too hard for Elira to raise the family in the small village and eventually, she moved the famly to Istanbul for a better future. Once in Istanbul, Elira worked hard through the help of relatives to support her children. Nadim finished university and then found worked as well, saving every penny until he was ready to start finding funds for his business, his father's construction company that once was very successful in the city.

After a few years, Nadim was able to bring back the family business and little by little, it grew and gained popularity and loyal clients. During this time, Nadim sent his young wife to the UK to continue her university studies...

ROMANTIC HISTORY: Nadim attended high school in their small village where he became very close with a young woman that evntually agreed to go out with him secretly. The young woman's family was financially challeged and conforming to society's norm, ended up marrying their daughters including Nadim's girlfriend at a very young age. He always cared for her that when she called one day asking to save her 15-year old sister, Zeynep from the same fate, Nadim responded and married the younger sister but only paper. Nadim promised to give Zeynep education and a better future. During this time, Zeynep's brother-in-law, her elder siseter's husband passed away suddenly. Nadim remained supporting his former high school girlfriend and her young children...

PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS: To be added.

THOUGHTS ON LOVE: “...”

HEALTH

PHOBIA(S): None.

HANDICAP(S): None.

MENTAL DISEASE(S): None.

PHYSICAL DISEASE(S): None.

PREDISPOSITION(S): Alcoholism.