nekostar4004

[nekostar4004]

[nekostar4004]

I had no idea what I was doing with the background so... whatever I guess

[nekostar4004]

🇳🇴 Norway: Are you DEADASS?

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 England: I am neither the dead nor the ass

🇷🇴 Romania: I am :P

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🇳🇴 Norway: Excuse me everyone, SEEEXX! Now that I have your attention.

🇷🇴 Romania: You don’t have my attention.

🇳🇴 Norway: Money!

🇷🇴 Romania: I’m listening.

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 England : You had me at sex.

🇳🇴 Norway: Pervert!

🇧🇾 Belarus: You have our attention just by screaming anything.

🇳🇴 Norway: That’s good to know. RAAAAAAAA-

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*At a dinner party, the guests converse while the host is away*

🇮🇹 Italy: So how do you know the host?

🇫🇷 France: They were a former vegan, and they bought milk.

🇮🇹 Romano: That BITCH!

��🇸 Spain: I pulled them over for money laundering.

🇵🇹 Portugal: I'm chaperoning their dinner party.

🇷🇴 Romania: They stole a baconator!

🇮🇹 Romano: That BITCH!

🇮🇹 Italy: I tanked the store they were managing and they convinced me to quit from one of the only jobs I've ever had. Now I'm living off of unemployment checks and fear!

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🇮🇹 Romano: Dumbest scar stories, go!

🇪🇸 Spain: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.

🇫🇷 France: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and it burned.

🇮🇹 Italy: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.

🇷🇴 Romania: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it in my hand and I got a really bad burn.

🇵🇹 Portugal: I have emotional scars.

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🇪🇸 Spain: Gilbert kissed me!

🇮🇹 Italy: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

🇪🇸 Spain: It was unbelievable!

🇮🇹 Italy: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

🇫🇷 France: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Afonso, get the wine and unplug the phone. Antonio, does this end well or do we need tissues?

🇪🇸 Spain: Oh, it ended very well.

🇵🇹 Portugal: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!

🇫🇷 France: Okay, alright, let's hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?

🇪🇸 Spain: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

🇮🇹 Italy: Ohh...So, okay, was he holding you? Or were his hands on your back?

🇪🇸 Spain: First he started out on my waist and then he slid up and then they were in my hair.

France and Italy: Ohhh~

.

*meanwhile*

🇩🇪 Prussia eating pizza: And, uh, and then I kissed him.

🇷🇴 Romania: Tongue ?

🇩🇪 Prussia: Yeah.

🇮🇹 Romano: Cool.

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🇷🇴 Romania: We have a problem.

🇫🇷 France: Let me guess, you caused it?

🇵🇹 Portugal: Gimme a sec, I'm not drunk enough to listen to this yet.

🇪🇸 Spain: And it's another Tuesday, your point?

🇮🇹 Romano: Would shooting you solve this problem ? No ? Then shut up.

🇮🇹 Italy: If you mean the fire, that's our solution to last week's problem.

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🇵🇹 Portugal: I CAN'T DO IT!

🇮🇹 Romano, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!

🇵🇹 Portugal: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

🇫🇷 France: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

🇵🇹 Portugal: ...

🇵🇹 Portugal: I appreciate it,

🇵🇹 Portugal: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

🇮🇹 Italy: Afonso-

🇵🇹 Portugal: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

🇷🇴 Romania: Afonso we gotta-

🇵🇹 Portugal: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

🇵🇹 Portugal: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

🇵🇹 Portugal, motioning to Spain: NOT FUCKING THIS

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🇫🇷 France: Christmas lights?

🇮🇹 Italy: Check.

🇪🇸 Spain: THermos of hot cocoa?

🇮🇹 Italy: Check.

🇵🇹 Portugal: Santa suits?

🇮🇹 Italy: Check.

🇷🇴 Romania: Shovel?

🇮🇹 Italy: Check.

🇮🇹 Romano: Alibi and bail money?

🇮🇹 Italy: Check - wait, WHAT?!

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🇩🇪 Prussia: You know, when Vladimir comes over, Erszébet can get a little…

🇳🇴 Norway: Psycho?

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 England: Scary?

🇧🇾 Belarus: Drunk?

🇩🇪 Prussia: All three.

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🇷🇴 Romania: I'm your brother Ştef, you can ask me any question

🇲🇩 Moldova: If "K" is a substitute for "Okay" and some people call their granpa "Pop", could K-Pop be a substitute for "Ok Bummer"?

🇷🇴 Romania: Any question but that.

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🇮🇹 Feliciano: Hewwo.

🇪🇸 Antonio: Hihiiiiii!

🇷🇴 Vladimir: Greetings, Humans.

🇵🇹 Afonso: Three kinds of people.

🇫🇷 Francis: I want pudding.

🇵🇹 Afonso: Four kinds of people.

🇮🇹 Lovino: WHAT’S UP FUCKERS?

🇵🇹 Afonso: Five kinds of people.

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*Romance family standing around the broken coffee maker*

Rome: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

🇮🇹 Italy: ...I did. I broke it.

Rome: No. No you didn't. Lovino?

🇮🇹 Romano: Don't look at me. Look at Vladimir.

🇷🇴 Romania: What?! I didn't break it.

🇮🇹 Romano: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

🇷🇴 Romania: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

🇮🇹 Romano: Suspicious.

🇷🇴 Romania: No, it's not!

🇪🇸 Spain: If it matters, probably not, but Francis was the last one to use it.

🇫🇷 France: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

🇪🇸 Spain: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

🇫🇷 France: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Antonio!

🇮🇹 Italy: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, granpa.

Rome: No! Who broke it!?

🇪🇸 Spain: granpa... Afonso's been awfully quiet.

🇵🇹 Portugal: Oh rEALLY?!

*Everyone starts arguing*

.

Rome, later on: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it.

Rome: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Rome: ...

Rome: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

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🇷🇴 Romania: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

🇮🇹 Italy: What if it bites me and it dies!?

🇮🇹 Romano: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ Feli, learn to listen.

🇪🇸 Spain: What if it bites itself and I die?

🇷🇴 Romania: That’s voodoo.

🇫🇷 France: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

🇷🇴 Romania: That’s correlation, not causation.

🇵🇹 Portugal: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

🇷🇴 Romania: That's, um. . .

🇫🇷 France: That’s kinky ;)

🇵🇹 Portugal: Oh my God.

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🇫🇷 France: Ok. Time for plan G.

🇵🇹 Portugal: Don’t you mean plan B?

🇫🇷 France: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.

🇮🇹 Italy: What about plan D?

🇮🇹 Romano: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

🇷🇴 Romania: What about plan E?

🇫🇷 France: I’m hoping not to use it. Antonio dies in plan E.

🇮🇹 Romano: I like plan E.

[nekostar4004]

Demon of the heart ❤