nerdyreaderpapi

[nerdyreaderpapi]

I loved this so much!! Can’t believe it’s chapter eighteen already! I never want it to end 😭😭

1) I’m glad that James enjoy his time as a doorman! Besides the few obvious things he’s pointed out but I’m glad it’s working out for him and that he enjoys it for the time being!

2) “Yeah, nah. Doubt the wife would be pleased,” he informed her, Steve snorting. 

- Wife!? That’s what I’m talking about James, I love the idea and James and Ella being married. It’s so crazy because I already kinda look at them as a married couple, it’s so funny realizing that they’re not married yet 😂😂

3) “It had three months since the pair had met properly, Steve and Andrea now very much an official couple.”

- YAY I’M SO HAPPY FOR THEM BOTH!! I knew they would be great together, and I’m really happy Steve stuck to his word and waited for Andrea! All the hard work she’s put in is paying off in more areas than one! I’d love hearing more about their progress together!

4) “I want a bloody word with you, James!” she yelled, swerving a group of people as she arrived in front of him. “And no flippin’ excuses!” 

- oh gosh, everytime Carole pops up I get anxiety! Maybe because I know she’s not right in the head at all and I don’t want any of her disgusting, disrespectful words to get to James or Ella’s head! I really hope that at one point hopefully soon, she stops her madness!

5) I love that Alan left Carole. I think as a family they all deserve better, they deserve someone who isn’t going to beat down on they for every little thing.

6) “Nah, you don’t wanna talk to him. You wanna shout at him some more and he don’t need it. Respect the fact he’s told you he’s done and for god’s sake, have a bit of dignity. You’re fifty-three, Carole. Christ’s sake.” 

- Another reason why I love Steve! I love how he always has James back even when it comes to his mother! I also thought it was really funny how Steve threw in her age😂😂 “you’re fifty-three, Carole. Christ’s sake.” I thought that was a really funny add on

7) “Wait, one second. You don’t blame yourself for any of this, do you? Please don’t tell me what she’s been throwing at you has sunk in?” 

- I love that Ella said this to James because I know it’s probably a lot dealing with a parent harassing you and then also making sure to don’t fall into the habit of believing their nonsense! I love how they care for each other

8) “Greenhall’s gonna throw down!” Steve announced. “It’ll be like when that bird had the cheek to fling herself down on Jim’s lap a few weeks ago, and you dragged her off by her hair and kicked her in the fanny!” 

- oh I love this!! I had a big laugh when I read this, I love that side of Ella😂😂😂

9) “You’d run out of space,” Steve muttered, receiving a slap to the forehead from his

Ella raised an eyebrow. “And the tattooist would need a magnifying glass to find yours.”

- OMG LMAOAOA I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!! I love their friendship, I absolutely adore how they have joke around with each other! Steve and Ella are best friendship goals

I absolutely adored this chapter! Sorry it’s taking me so long to catch up but I promise I’m almost there! I can’t wait for the next one!

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Eighteen.

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,417

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

“I.D, please.” 

“But I’m eighteen! Just let me in, you twat!” 

James snickered, shaking his head. “Oh, yeah. I’m really gonna let you in now you’ve called me a twat, innit? I.D or you ain’t coming in, princess.” 

“Ahh, fuck off!” 

“Kids.” he muttered, his breath clouding the winter air as he stood on the doors of Rotunda, a club that played awful music and usually was packed to the rafters with awful people, too. Then there were the girls who were barely sixteen trying their luck to actually get in, just like the one he’d turned away for her lack of I.D.  

Apart from the underaged trying his patience, pissed up arseholes throwing up on him as he dragged them out of the club or fights he had to break up, James was genuinely enjoying his time being a doorman once again. It was entertaining if nothing else.  

“Oi sexy!” A girl from amongst a group of six called as she and her friends approached, grinning at him lasciviously. “You’re fucking gorgeous, you are!” 

“Cheers, darlin’,” he spoke, grinning. “You having a good night, girls?”  

“Yeah! Even better now I’ve seen you!” she spoke, shuddering from her lack of coat in the weather that truly necessitated the need for one. Even James was feeling it beneath his black suit and long, black wool coat. Doormen were required to dress smart at certain establishments. When he did the doors at The Gallows, he could be a lot more casual. Just as long as his doorman’s lanyard was displayed somewhere, usually clipped onto his black bomber jacket, the standard in the rock scene doorman attire.  

“So, will you take me home at the end of the night, then?” the girl continued to flirt, obviously a good few drinks in as she made a move to hug him, James stepping back and shaking his head.  

“Yeah, nah. Doubt the wife would be pleased,” he informed her, Steve snorting. 

“She’d fucking have your eyes out,” he snickered, taking a sip of his Redbull.  

“Oh, you’re married! She’s a lucky girl!” 

“Not officially, but as good as, innit,” James spoke, moving them along through the doors. “You girls have fun, behave yourselves.” He watched them head inside, turning to Steve with a pained look on his face. “I fucking love my sexy little princess to bits, I do, but I swear, mate. The outfits some of these birds come out in!” His exclamation was followed by a long, low whistle of approval, Steve laughing filthily. 

“Yeah man, fucking quality legs, them lot had!” he chuckled, nodding in welcome to the next group of people through the doors. Their chatter was disturbed momentarily by one of the bar staff appearing, Tanya requesting James’s presence quickly to help deescalate a situation. Five minutes later and he and Clive, one of the bouncers patrolling the inside of the club, the man who also ran the security for the doors came bursting back out, throwing out two men who’d been embroiled in a fight. 

“I’ll fucking kill ya, ya fucking wanker!” The one who James had thrown out threatened, James shrugging. 

“You can try, mate. Ain’t advisable, though,” he sniffed, Clive pointing with a smirk. 

“You’ll get the fuck away from my doors, is what you’ll do! No matter how much I’d pay good money to see you take on a six-foot three kickboxer!” he warned, popping a fresh piece of gum into his mouth as the drunken guys staggered away. “Fuckin’ pissed up tossers.” 

With Clive going back indoors, James lit himself a cigarette, enjoying the 1am lull. The club closed at two, so as of that moment they’d no longer be letting people in, meaning he could breathe for a second. “You coming up The Gallows after we’re done here? I’m sure your missus is out with mine tonight.”  

It had three months since the pair had met properly, Steve and Andrea now very much an official couple. “Are they? Thought they were staying in tonight?” 

He snorted, shaking his head. “And when have you ever known Ella to stay in on a Saturday night?” 

“Yeah, fair,” Steve spoke, turning to a group approaching. “No more in tonight, guys. Sorry.” 

The group moved away, the men casting their eyes up and down the high street, once again finding themselves subjects of female attention. 

“Look! The hot rocker guys are on the doors at Rotunda! Alright, gorgeous number one and gorgeous number two!” 

“I’d better be gorgeous number one, sweetheart!” Steve called to her with a wink, pointing at James. “Because ya can’t mean this fucking knob over here!” 

“Oi, less of your mouth, dickhead,” he snorted, taking another drag on his cigarette.  

“Don’t matter, I’d let both of you shag me into the middle of next week!” the woman called, swiftly yanking up her top and flashing them, both falling into hysterics. 

“Ahh, life of a doorman. Never fucking dull!” Steve exclaimed, James nodding. 

“Fair comment, mate.” 

Truly, it wasn’t, but sometimes for reasons a lot less favourable. Ten minutes later, and James had that confirmed to him by who he saw approaching. “For fucks sake,” he muttered, unable to believe his eyes, Steve turning.  

“Nah, what the hell?” he spoke, seeing Carole marching across the road. “The fuck is your mum doing out this late?” 

A valid question if there ever was one, James feeling his muscles stiffen all over in anticipation. “I think I’m about to find out.” 

“I want a bloody word with you, James!” she yelled, swerving a group of people as she arrived in front of him. “And no flippin’ excuses!” 

“I’m working,” he stated plainly, his nostrils beginning to flare at her immediate display of audacity. “Go home. If I’ve told you once I’ve told you a hundred times, you’ve tanked your relationship with me permanently. There’s nothing you have to say that I wanna hear.” 

Carole scoffed bitterly; her eyes wide. “Oh, oh I think you will! Your father has left me, and it’s all your bloody fault! You and that girlfriend of yours poisoning him against me!” 

Her words hit him like a shard of ice square to the chest. Honestly, he never thought it would happen, although with his mother’s temperament, he’d always quietly wondered what kept them together. “He’s what?” 

“Left me! Told me tonight that he’s found another house, him and Sam have both upped and left!”  

Now the shock had absorbed slightly, it wasn’t all too scandalous a thing to hear. Sam had confided in him in recent weeks that her picking and goading had become unbearable, with James no longer in her life to take the brunt of it. “Can’t say I blame him, or Sam, going on what she’s told me. Do you see now, how the way you behave drives people away? You’ve only got yourself to blame here, mum.” 

“I blame you!” 

He shook his head, narrowing his eyes. “You’re out of your bloody mind.” Turning to Steve, he received raised eyebrows. “It’s fine, mate. I’m gonna go have a wander around inside. I’ll send Mohammad out to cover.” 

“James, James! You get back here!” Carole called, making a move to enter the club as he walked through the doors, the music blaring loudly. Steve moved swiftly, blocking her way.  

“Carole, go home. I think you’ve said enough,” he spoke evenly.  

“I shan’t! Not until I’ve spoken to my son!” she screamed through gritted teeth, trying to get past him. He really didn’t want to have to put his hands on her, but she gave him little choice, shoving against him, Steve eventually taking her by the tops of her arms and walking her back to the curb. 

“Nah, you don’t wanna talk to him. You wanna shout at him some more and he don’t need it. Respect the fact he’s told you he’s done and for god’s sake, have a bit of dignity. You’re fifty-three, Carole. Christ’s sake.” 

“I won’t!” she yelled, Steve sighing. 

“Then you’ll give me no choice but to call the old bill then, won’t you?” 

The doors opened, the imposing presence of Mohammad exiting, jerking his head away from the club. “Not tonight, love. Go on. Off you go.” 

Seeing that she was getting nowhere fast, she glared at the both. “Tell him I’ll be at his flat tomorrow morning, and he’d better let me in! I need to talk to him!” 

Steve’s eyes widened. “Don’t fancy your chances at not getting smacked in the mouth by Ella if you do, but choice is yours.” 

Storming away, Steve shook his head, pulling out his cigarettes. “Woman’s a fucking psycho.”  

“Who is she?” Mohammad asked, frowning. 

“James’s mum.” He was met by widened eyes. “Yeah. It ain’t good right now in the Kingston household.” 

“You ain’t fucking joking there, brother!”  

Truly, with this new development, everything was about as far from good as it could get. Since November, Carole had been effectively harassing her son, James having to change his phone number because of her continued calls to the flat, long-winded messages and verbal abuse, most of which directed at Ella. “None of this happened before that vile little piece of rubbish came along! As soon as you took up with her, you threw away your relationship with me, your own mother!” 

She still couldn’t understand how truly, it had been a long time coming. Nor could she see that in the three months since he’d extracted himself from a relationship with her, how week by week she’d slowly alienated her husband a little further. Alan had been round at the flat a lot to visit, explaining it all, how the person he was living with was becoming less and less like the woman he’d married and raised two wonderful children with. 

Still, though, James truly hadn’t envisaged him actually leaving her because of it. His father was a creature of habit and comfort, and at fifty-five, he’d assumed that starting afresh wasn’t on the agenda for him. To hear the news delivered by his mother that night, it truly had shocked him. Not unpleasantly, though. James simply couldn’t believe that he’d finally done it, but was very proud of him that he had.  

He pondered it all as he toured the club, helping the bar staff by collecting a few glasses, tapping a girl who was about to give her boyfriend a blowjob on the shoulder and shaking his head, warning them to cool it down or go home. Continuing to walk, he kept his eyes peeled, thinking to himself that he needed to call his dad first thing, check in and see if he was okay, offer his help with anything he might need.  

It kept hitting him in waves, but guilt never rippled him once as they washed over him. If anything, it was vindication, knowing that his issues with his mother hadn’t purely stemmed from his own predisposition for being hot tempered. She’d now driven away her entire immediate family, all stemming from the wretched way she’d treated him for the last year especially.  

Unlike her constant assertions, he was not the one with the problem.  

Once his shift was done and the club closed, James unfastened his tie and gladly shoved it into his pocket, undoing a couple of the buttons on the deep grey shirt he wore before leaving, ready to get back to his own turf. Even if it was only effectively for one drink before going home with Ella.  

“It never ceases to wear off, you know, how fucking mint you look in a suit, baby,” she purred after sinking into his arms at the bar, greeting him with a big kiss. It was of course his own brand of suited and booted, his hair remaining free (a ponytail could easily be used against you in an altercation) and a huge pair of steel toecap boots on his feet, but still, it sent Ella ravenous all the same.  

“Same to you,” he quipped, raising an eyebrow, “but change suit for PVC.” In the time they’d been together, his world had definitely rubbed off on her in both her taste in music and style. She still didn’t like a lot of the bands he was into and definitely preferred her dance music, but there had been a definite evolution. Like that night, wearing a Black Sabbath t-shirt she’d customised into a cropped top, and a pair of skintight, black PVC trousers with her military boots.  

Once he had a cold pint in his hand, he took her over to the rear doors and out into the mostly deserted outdoor section, taking off his coat and wrapping it around her so she didn’t freeze to death.  

“BFG, why are we outside in the bleedin’ cold?” she asked, lighting two cigarettes and handing one to him. “They’ve said we might have snow at some point.”  

“Needed to be somewhere quiet for what I’ve gotta tell you, little,” he began, taking a big swig of his beer. “My fucking mother turned up at the club tonight, screaming like a harpy and all that. Turns out dad left her earlier this evening. He’s got a house and taken Sam with him.” 

Ella’s jaw virtually hit her knees. “No! Oh, my fucking god! That’s... well that’s... that’s... oh the shit has hit the fan. Big time.”  

He lifted his chin, eyes widening. “Innit? She was fucking fuming, blaming me, all of that. Shitting hell, babe. She still can’t fucking see it either, like. Still blaming everyone except herself for how things have ended up for her.”  

She rolled her eyes. Truly, in the five months she and James had been together on the outside, at least (both counting their relationship to have begun while in Moor Acres, giving an actual time of almost eight months) just over half of it had been spent dealing with the fallout from his decision to cease contact with Carole. “Wait, one second. You don’t blame yourself for any of this, do you? Please don’t tell me what she’s been throwing at you has sunk in?” 

“Nah, darlin’,” he confirmed quickly, reaching for her hand. “Not at all. I’m just fucking stunned my dad has finally walked out on her. Proud of him too, like. It weren’t healthy for Sam, living in an environment like that. She’s got her A levels looming, she don’t need all that top grade bullshit to contend with.”  

A statement she could heavily agree with, studying currently for the same herself on a part-time basis around working at the florists. They remained outside for only a short time before going back in, enjoying the remainder of their night. Grabbing some food from the local chip shop, the four got in a taxi at 3am, coming home to a freezing cold flat, Ella and Andrea lighting all the candles to warm the space and avoid putting the boiler on.  

“Here, that’s yours,” Ella spoke, handing the huge burger and chips to Steve, Andrea passing the container loaded with chicken kebab meat and salad to Ella.  

“Cheers, Ells,” he spoke, taking a massive bite. “Oh mate, I almost forgot. The mothership said she’d be round here first thing to talk to you, just to warn ya.” 

James closed his eyes tightly, brow furrowing with a deep-set line. “For fucks sake, man. She can stand out there all she likes, though. The only thing I’m getting up for in the morning is to give the wife a good seeing to. End of list, innit.” 

“I approve of this,” Ella chirped, everyone laughing. “She’d better not turn up screaming, though. I’m on my last nerve with that woman with all she’s been throwing at me with her answering machine rants. Very uncool beans.” 

“Greenhall’s gonna throw down!” Steve announced. “It’ll be like when that bird had the cheek to fling herself down on Jim’s lap a few weeks ago, and you dragged her off by her hair and kicked her in the fanny!” 

“Told her! I bleedin’ told her she’d get hoofed right in the flaps if she touched my boyfriend. And she did, grabbing his cock as well!” she cried, the boyfriend himself nearly choking on a mouthful of kebab burger as he exploded with laughter. Ella virtually had no temper at all, very sweet and chilled out in her nature. If her buttons were pushed, though. Hell hath no fury.  

“Hoofed right in the flaps,” he guffawed, laughing even harder as Andrea began her usual brand of scream-giggles. “Fuck, I love you. You come out with absolute fucking comedic gold, innit.” 

“Wait, woah,” Andrea exclaimed, taking a breath, “that girl grabbed your cock? That’s not on!” 

“Ain’t even my cock anymore, darlin’,” James spoke, smirking. “Might as well get ‘property of Ella Greenhall’ tattooed on it.” 

“You’d run out of space,” Steve muttered, receiving a slap to the forehead from his friend.  

Ella raised an eyebrow. “And the tattooist would need a magnifying glass to find yours.” Oh, how James roared at that, Steve muttering something about putting her over his knee. 

Making her boyfriend laugh was very much on Ella’s agenda, with the looming threat of Carole turning up in the morning. It was like nothing even penetrated her head; how selfish she was being aside for her lack of realisation over her own misdeeds. Not only was she content to turn up while her son was working, she had also threatened to try and visit him at home, after he’d just worked a nine-hour shift into the early hours of the morning.  

It truly highlighted her complete lack of care for anyone else but herself.  

They all went to bed that night hoping that the morning would not bring hurricane Carole with it. By 9:30am, though, sadly the storm blew in. James and Ella were both dead to the world when the front door buzzer to gain access to the block began sounding, but those in the bedroom opposite heard it.  

“That’s... oh bloody hell... that’s her, isn’t it?” Andrea panted, her back sliding against the far wall as Steve pounded her against it, hands gripped tightly beneath her thighs.  

“Probably. Fucked if I care, though.” Now that their relationship had opened up to the sexual element, he was hesitant to let anything disturb his enjoyment of that. Especially the incessant droning of the door buzzer. However, it did begin to irritate him enough to move with her across the room, switch his stereo on and press play, the loudness of black metal band Dimmu Borgir beginning to blast from the speakers. “There, annoying noise blocked.” 

Andrea’s back hit the bed, Steve kneeling before her, pushing her knees back until they touched her chest as his eyes fell to watch his cock sinking back and forth in the wet hug of her snug cunt. Looking back at her, his grin began to widen. “What you smirking at, gorgeous?” 

“The fact you’ve replaced one loud noise with another, and now I’ll have to do my clarinet solo extra, extra loud.” The joke she’d made those few months ago still had her now-boyfriend in stitches, Steve leaning to her, crushing his mouth to hers.  

“Like my sexy little redheaded honey is ever anything but.” While they enjoyed themselves, back in the other bedroom, James awoke irritated by the sudden boom of music, flinging his bedroom door open about to go and tear shreds off of Steve. He then heard the buzzer and quickly changed his stance.  

“That fucking woman.” Unhooking the intercom phone, he left it dangling, marching back into his bedroom with a series of angry cusses, throwing himself back beneath the two duvets keeping out the winter cold and wrapping around a groggy Ella. “Fancy a shag since we’re awake? I did say you were the only thing I planned to get up for today.” 

“So romantic,” she murmured, laughing as she turned to kiss him. “Always. Excuse me.” Sinking down, she turned him onto his back, kissing her way over his abs as her hand curled around his cock. When her mouth joined it, he began to feel his agitation melting away, the pleasure of a warm, skilled mouth also taking the sting out of the fact he hadn’t gotten nearly enough sleep. And he was on the doors again later that evening. 

Sadly, though, it was not to last. Carole, it seemed, would not take being ignored lying down. 

[nerdyreaderpapi]

Oh my goodness!!!! I AM IN FREAKING LOVE WITH THIS STORY OMG!! I LOVE FINDING NEW READS TO OBSESS OVER

Holy shit I’m so excited! I did see in my notifications that there’s two chapters for it out already and I can’t wait to catch up and get to them!!

I’m already in love with Nathan! And holly and Kelsey AND Chris I’m so excited to read more about them all.

And Nathan and Holly meeting again as adults now!! Oh this is going to be so interesting I can’t wait to read it and get all the juicy details!!

You are the only author who can rope me in with original stories! They’re always so fricken good!!

Thank you so so so much for your kind words on the last reblog, it’s still been kinda tuff but things have been looking up! There has been a lot more light this past week and I have certainly been feeling a lot better when I read these lovely stories!! Thank you so much for your beautiful words, lots of love from me to you💗💗

Little Earthquakes - An Original Story.

So, besties. I thought I'd test the waters with the prologue to my new story. I know so many of you aren't here for originals, but I can but hope I'll find a few readers. Nothing would delight me more! Now, let's get to introducing you to the new world and people within it! I've tagged a few people who I thought might be interested, but if not, no worries.

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 2,831

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Minors DNI!

Prologue.

In every year group of every school the world over, there is always the girl. She’s the one whom other girls covet to be like, and pretty much all of the boys want to get with. In the year eleven group of Fulham Green Academy, west London, back in two thousand and five, that girl had been Holly Madden.  

She was popular, kind, proficient academically, and god, she was beautiful. Holly was also the girl one of her classmates would have asked out in a heartbeat, had Nathan ever been able to sum up the courage to open his mouth and speak to her. Various other factors prevented such, too, namely that they socialised in two vastly different groups at their mixed senior school. She was one of the popular girls, after all, and Nathan one of the alternative kids.  

The two groups seldom mixed.  

That was until one night when Lee Harris, the kid who loved everybody regardless of what social group they slotted into, threw a large end of term party. It was a classic example of ‘my parents are on holiday, I’m not, everybody come over!’ that led to much teenage abandon and hedonistic excess. Especially if your name was Nathan Gill.  

The only difference? He hadn’t actually wanted to end up in the state he had. Not at all. Enter one Chris Lawrence and a tray full of weed-infused brownies. 

“This tastes weird,” Nathan announced, yet for the kid with a massive disposition for demolishing anything chocolatey, it still hadn’t stopped him from consuming it. 

Chris didn’t know how the hell he managed to stop himself from falling apart laughing, standing with their cohort Kelsey, both playing captive audience to the mild deception of their friend. “Does it? Can’t think why, blud.” 

“Yeah.” He then paused in chewing the last mouthful, watching his friends carefully. “Why are you’s staring at me?”  

“No reason,” Kelsey chimed, clapping a hand to his shoulder, almost able to hear his brain ticking away within his skull. 

“Have you put something in this?” The two snorts of laughter were confirmation that yes, they very much had. “Oh, shit off! Nah man, that’s proper messed up.”  

His friends howled, watching a very disgruntled Nathan deal with the confirmation that he had indeed been doped. Chris reached for him, ruffling his hair. “Bruv, it’s only a bit of ganja, yeah?” 

“Yeah, but I don’t pissing smoke weed, do I?” 

“And you still haven’t,” Chris chimed. “You’ve ate it!” 

The pout on his face had his friends furtherly descending. “Don’t like being stoned though, do I? That’s why I don’t have nothing to fucking do with the cheeba!” Getting a rise out of the usually very chilled, very zen Nathan was half the fun of it. Seeing him stoned off his balls was the other, Nathan still furious as he finished the remainer of his can of Carlsberg. “I’m not talking to either of you’s.” 

How right he was, for when it kicked in, speech was beyond him completely. 

“Nath, you alright, mate?” Lee, the party host asked an hour later, finding Nathan sitting at the kitchen nook with a pad of paper and a pen. A note was scrawled. 

“Yeah, just can’t speak. Too mashed. Got spiked via cake.” 

Reading the words, he began to laugh. “Ahhh, the pot brownies? Nice!” More scribbling followed. 

“Not nice! I don’t like weed!” 

To Lee’s credit, he held in the desire to piss himself laughing at his mate’s anguish.  

“Oh, right! You want a coffee or something? My mum has the fancy machine so I’ll make you one if you want?” 

“No thanks. Just wanna throw Chris and Kels into a pissing landfill!” 

He boomed with laughter, shaking his head. “Well, I best be moving along, got to do the mingling thing. Later mate!” 

“Bye.”  

He was left alone then, except for the glances from across the kitchen from Kelsey, who was trying her luck chatting up one of the sixth form girls while keeping a watchful eye on him. That suited him fine, not actually able to speak anyway, sitting there feeling very, very high. It was a different high to smoking it, he had to confess, but he still didn’t like it much.  

He felt very fuzzy around the edges, his vision faltering a little bit, but not so much that he couldn’t make out the face of the girl he fancied when she approached him half an hour later. Oh, god. Why Holly Madden? Why now? 

Sitting down in the nook adjacent to him, her smile glowed. “Hi, Nathan. You okay?” He turned the pad of paper to her and pointed to the first statement he’d written to Lee, wishing the ground would open up and swallow him whole. “Ohhhh, not one for weed then, no?” 

“Bingo.” 

“Do you want me to leave you be, or can I kotch here? I need a time out, too many drunk people.” 

He scribbled, feeling his heart racing. Holly Madden wanted to sit with him. Him! 

“That’s fine, but I’ll be on mute for the foreseeable.”  

Shrugging, she smiled, a smile that made his heart skip. “That’s fine. I’m not really into loud people. Even when you’re talking you seem quiet and chilled. I like that.”  

She’d actually noticed those attributes? Oh, god. It was a good job he couldn’t speak, because if he could he’d have likely ballsed it up spectacularly. Then again, it wasn’t surprising. Holly was very much like the party host in the fact she was open to mingling with everyone, regardless of her status as one of the popular girls. “So, I noticed your display board for the examiners before we broke up. That charcoal you did of the snake was incredible!” 

They’d been in the same art group as well as form class at school, submitting their final presentation to the exam board in the shape of a display of their work, which made up half of their GSCE grade. Nathan nodded, taking the pen and scribbling out a note.  

“Thanks. I was proud of that one. Loved your stuff, too.”  

She was sure he was just being polite since their artistic styles so vastly differed, but thanked him for the compliment anyway. “I’m crapping myself about the results. I really, really want to get in at UAL. Are you thinking uni, too, or something else?” 

Again, he began to write. “Yeah, uni. Loughborough, I wanna get out of London for a few years.” 

It was a good university, showing clearly that he had a lot of ambition. Sitting there, Holly began to feel a little uncomfortable, the manor of communication strange in the fact he couldn’t actually speak. Also, she felt shy. He had no idea how fucking cute he was, which was an odd feeling to experience, being that he was the furthest from her usual taste in guys.  

“Well, I’m going to head back to my friends. If you regain the power of speech, come find me.” 

Come find her? She actually wanted him to come and find her? While his brain flew into a panic, his note was calm and succinct.  

“Alright. Bye, Holly.” Whether or not he could, he knew that he wouldn’t, though, waiting until she’d left the kitchen before groaning and pulling his hood up over his head as he slumped down, wanting to hide. Oh, the shame of it. Too stoned to talk to the girl he liked when the opportunity to do so had landed right in his lap, and he’d blown it.  

Fuck Chris. Fuck Kelsey.  

He had to hand it to the latter, though. At midnight when they’d left, she’d been the one to carry him over her shoulder into the waiting taxi when he’d found he was without the use of his legs as well as his voice. Thank goodness she was a big girl, just a little shorter than him at six feet to his six feet two, and built like an ox.  

She’d also carried him safely up the stairs and into her bed, stripping his skate trainers and jeans before climbing in herself, definitely worse for wear. Being very much out in her status as a lesbian, her parents didn’t give two hoots about her sharing a bed with male friends at all, knowing there was more chance of hell freezing over than any sexual shenanigans occurring between them.  

Not that either of them had ever tiptoed out of virgin territory at that point in their lives. As he fell asleep, Nathan kicked himself that the girl he very much would have liked to change that with had been the one he couldn’t even speak to, and now it was too late. He’d likely never cross paths with the beautiful Holly Madden again now they’d left school. 

He was partly right there, their lives leading them in very different directions for many years after that night. Nineteen, to be exact. While she had never left London, Nathan had been to Loughborough, lived up in Edinburgh for a few years, gone over to spend time in Dublin, living a very carefree existence as a freelance tattoo artist who travelled from shop to shop. 

Life was everything he’d ever wanted it to be, and he all but forgot about Holly completely. 

Arriving back in London at twenty-seven, he’d met a girl, deciding to set up permanent roots in the city again. He and Lisa had married a year later, and a few months after that he, Kelsey and Chris had all gone into business together. The three had coveted to work in the tattoo world since their time at school, Nathan the only one who had gotten an apprenticeship and done it right out of leaving university.  

Kelsey had tired of the monotony of managing bars, and Chris was more than fed up of work in retail, so both had moved into their chosen field finally six and three years before, respectively. In two thousand and seventeen, Carpe Diem had opened its doors on Sailsbury Road, Queen’s Park.  

It was truly wonderful, the three best friends all reunited and running a thriving business together. Until the day where things started to go awry for one of them finally came along.  

“Kels, why you hovering, blud?” Chris asked, glad to be coming to the end of a lot of linework on the full backpiece he was starting on his client that afternoon. Pausing to reload ink, he raised an eyebrow, looking to the back of the shop as Kelsey listened in at the door of the private room used for clients receiving a body piercing.  

Craning her ears, she could hear it just above the sound of music playing, the band Soundgarden’s classic Black Hole Sun muffling the other noise emanating. Well, unless you listened closely, like her. With widened eyes, she moved away rapidly, shaking her head with her hands held out wide. 

“Oh, no, no, no.”  

Chris was perplexed. “What?” 

Jerking her thumb, she mouthed her reply, lest the client on the table before him hear what she’d had to. “He’s shagging in there.”  

His eyes all but fell out onto the hardwood floor beneath his feet. “Fuck off!” he mouthed back. 

“I’m serious!” she hissed in whisper, waving a pointed finger towards the back of the shop rapidly before beginning to clean down her station, ready and fresh for her next client. It wasn’t so much that he was a married man shagging somebody who wasn’t his wife, since he and Lisa were recently separated, it was the lack of professionalism to be doing it at his place of business with the girl whose navel he’d just pierced that shocked his friends more than anything.  

It would be fair to say he hadn’t quite been right since his marriage had come to an end. If either was truly honest, his behaviour had been very decidedly unlike the Nathan they knew and loved for much longer. Shagging around now that he was separated was one thing, but doing such with a client right there in the shop, though, was quite another. People talked, after all.  

Kelsey stewed on it as she continued cleaning her station, not wanting his reputation as one of the most talented tattoo artists in the city to become besmirched by such, or the good name of the shop to suffer either. After all, it wasn’t solely his livelihood this kind of behaviour could affect.  

Five minutes later and the door opened, the girl walking out before Nathan, who moved to the sales desk and took her payment for the piercing. With Chris’s client also now out the door, the two artists turned to their friend, the latter shaking his head. 

“Who’s been a bad lad then, ay?” 

Nathan didn’t have a poker face for the life of him, yet still, he tried. “What?” 

“Oh, no, no, no,” Kelsey stated, pointing at him. “Can’t fool us. I know sex moaning when I hear it, no matter how quiet. Listen, you wanna sow your oats now you and Lisa have split, go ahead. But not in the bloody shop, Nath!”  

He shrugged. “Weren’t like I was being that loud.” He then turned to Chris, mischief broadening his grin. “Had to cup my hand over her mouth. Poor girl ain’t ever had a pierced dick before, bruv.”  

His friend wanted to be supportive to Kelsey’s very real concerns, but the lad in him won out. “Fuckin’ a, blud! Little randy bastard, ay?”  

He held out his fist, Nathan bumping it as he chuckled filthily. “I’m a free man again, and shit, can you blame me? Proper gorgeous, she was.”  

“For the love of the virgin Mary’s knicker elastic!” Kelsey cried, placing her hands on her hips. “Can we take this seriously and set a rule? No shagging in the bloody shop!!”  

Nathan moved to her, grabbing her face in his hands and kissing her head. Immediately, she was aghast. “Don’t you kiss me! I don’t know where your mouth was ten minutes ago. I don’t want any miscellaneous fanny juice on my face!” 

“Never thought those words would ever leave your mouth, ay,” Chris interjected with on a snort. 

Nathan all but broke apart in hysterics completely at them, wrapping Kelsey in a big, tight hug. “You’re safe, didn’t have time for that. But chill out, ‘kay? Nothing to stress about, Kels. Just a one off.”  

Being held close by her friend, there was something else amiss, she noted. Or rather smelled. Nathan usually reeked of nothing but Fahrenheit aftershave, his staple scent since his teen years. Now though, it was tinged with the smell of alcohol. “You been drinking?” 

Letting her go, he shrugged, moving to begin sorting inks over at the storage shelves, knowing they needed to re-order. “Had a few last night. Probably sweating it out.”  

She left it there, but truly, she didn’t believe a word of it. It smelled fresh, not that stale, boozy sweat stink people suffered after a night on the piss. Also, he showered twice a day religiously. Besides, to her knowledge, he hadn’t even gone out the night before. She’d left him there at the shop at ten the previous evening, Nathan locking up before heading upstairs to the tiny flat above, where he was now living after Lisa had kicked him out.  

It was conflicting, because Nathan wasn’t a liar either, Kelsey doubting herself a little as she welcomed her next client, a guy who was having the side of his neck finished off by her that afternoon. All thoughts of her friend and his slightly off behaviour were put aside, concentrating one hundred percent on her task at hand.  

As for Nathan, he moved to his book of line drawings, taking the relevant one out and placing it on the light box to make sure he was one hundred percent happy with it. He prided himself on giving his clients the very best of his work. The young woman whose navel he’d pierced could definitely testify to that after the repeated push of his cock piercing against her g spot had made her come so hard, she’d almost passed out.  

He smirked as he thought about her, noting that she was the first girl he’d ever fucked whose name he neither knew nor cared to know. For a man who didn’t really do sleeping around even before he was married, it made an exciting change now he was free from the bitch who he’d wasted the last seven years with.  

“Hi, I’ve got an appointment with Nathan?” 

Turning around, he couldn’t believe his eyes. There she was. “Erm, yeah. Yeah, that’s me. Hi, Holly.” 

He would have been lying if he’d claimed to have given his old school crush much thought in the nineteen years that had passed, but seeing her standing there, suddenly he felt just as he had at fifteen all over again. 

[nerdyreaderpapi]

LOVED LOVED LOVED THIS CHAPTER!!

1) Okay so Steve and Andrea!!! Oh my goodness, I love that you gave them their own little starting in the beginning of the chapter, I loved seeing them just being all sweet and talking with each other!

2) “I meant it though, when I said I’d wait for you to be ready.” It was the tenth time he’d stated that emphatically in the last four hours. “I know I’m a man whore, I know. But with you, I wouldn’t be. Never fucking met a girl like you before, Ands.” 

-Steve saying he means it when he said he’s wait for her!! Oh that was so cute, I love how he’s changing because he actually wants to be with her and doesn’t want anything causal! I’m so proud of him and I’m so happy for Andrea!!

3) NOW TO MY BABIES ELLA AND JAMES!

“This is teasing, BFG.” 

- Ella is my favourite! I love her humour and I know she was seriously here but the nickname BFG made me laugh!

He shrugged, moving his long curtain of hair until it splayed over his scratched up back, grinning smugly. “Be patient, little.” 

- and James nickname for her!! I love it, even when they’re being all romantic and intimate they never fail to bring to smile on my face!

4) His kisses were devouring, the stroking of his hands consuming, his hips rolling in perfect sync with hers, Ella feeling overcome by him, that moment, everything. How could a union so perfect exist? With him, it was beyond euphoria, gilded in nirvana, a rush of unstoppable glimmers.  

-this paragraph!! Oh my gosh it was perfection, I felt like I was reading poetry! Seriously, the feeling described were just so beautiful. I re read a few times and each time made me gosh and smile even wider! You’re amazing!!

5) “James, you’re... still hard?” 

-maybe this shouldn’t have been funny but it certainly was!! Something about them “finishing up” and then Ella seeing her man still hard😭😭 she was in shock! And so was I!

6) “But he's... and she... and...” she stated, gesturing with her hand at Steve’s now closed again bedroom door. 

- Ella being so confused over the fact that Steve and Andrea just talked is so funny😂😂😂😭 her and James not believing they just talked until they fell asleep 😭😭😭

7) “Ella, it’s Carole. Is my son there?” 

- go AWAY 🤺🤺🤺 Carole truly is on my shit list!! She was so so so mean to Ella and James and I’m actually really glad that James is setting boundaries and doesn’t want to speak to her! She doesn’t deserve having James in her life after she was so cruel

I really really loved this chapter so much! I can’t wait to read more and see them grow! I love their progress, how they became better for themselves but also each other! My babies are growing on me 😭☹️

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Seventeen.

Huge thanks as ever to my little audience for your continued support of my story :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,551

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

“They’re gonna think I’m shagging you in here, you know,” Steve spoke as 4am rolled around, listening to music playing quietly as he and Andrea lay side by side on his bed. 

She shrugged. “Hmm, the absence of sexy sounds might negate that.”  

“Oh, and I’d make you do all of ‘em. The entire fucking orchestra!” 

“Even the clarinet?” 

He threw his head back, laugh booming, that same laugh that had attracted her to him in the first place. “Especially the bloody clarinet!” 

She reached for him, stroking his face, marvelling at how lovely he was. On the inside of the slightly uncouth, very sexually free man lay a person of much greater depth, one whom she shared so many common interests with. God, it had hit her hard, just how much she liked him. It very much went the same for the man himself, too. 

“I meant it though, when I said I’d wait for you to be ready.” It was the tenth time he’d stated that emphatically in the last four hours. “I know I’m a man whore, I know. But with you, I wouldn’t be. Never fucking met a girl like you before, Ands.” 

Blushing, she hid her face behind her hand, laughing softly, sinking deeper into the pillows. “Nope, you ain’t doing that just for me. Not with the absolute flock of bloody women I saw checking you out tonight.” 

“I will, though. Just you see. You can’t have casual sex and nah, I don’t want it to be casual when you finally let me, so there you have it. Gone and got me attached to ya an’ all that.” He paused, leaning in close, nose touching hers. “Ya dickhead.” 

God, the sparkle of her laugh, Andrea poking him in the cheek with her fingernail before leaning to offer a soft kiss. Kissing was fine, just as long as that was all it was. Much to his surprise, he was fine with that, too.  

As he’d sat there talking to her, both becoming hugely excited that the things they were into were shared in passion by the other, his other rotation of women had flitted from his brain one by one. He should have been scared, that at twenty-two and after only knowing her for eleven hours, he was ready to hang up his very much single and ready to mingle status for her solely.  

He wasn’t, though. Not at all.  

Why? He’d found her.  

He didn’t tell her what he’d revealed to James and Ella either, that somehow he knew intrinsically that she was the girl he’d marry one day. He sensed he’d likely scare her off with such a rapid declaration, but he knew. He just knew, something deep within his soul was touched by the magic of hers, giving him a feeling of complete peace unlike any other girl he’d ever been with. And he hadn’t actually been with her yet in the physical sense.  

What was more? It wasn’t scary at all. He’d gone from twenty-two and unwilling to be tied down, to ‘yep, here she is. This one here. This is the girl’ in the space of an evening. He only felt sublimely peaceful about that, too. The fact he didn’t feel scared at all was what sealed it for him.  

“What are you grinning at?” she asked, her hand wandering to stroke the scruff where his short, dark beard flecked his neck. 

Looking down at her, he reached to rub the apple of her freckled cheek with his thumb, his smile widening even more. “You’ll see.” 

“Don’t you be getting any ideas!” 

He chuckled, resting his head down. “Furthest thing from my mind, honey.” And it honestly was. While they continued to cuddle and chat, things were certainly a lot less calm across the other side of the flat, James and Ella still enjoying themselves after a brief nap. 

The pace did not take on anything close to the raging desire that had bubbled up between them after that sleep, though, more a soft adagio, a slowly hummed symphony, James pausing to look down upon her, drinking in the moment, the soft blue of her eyes, his hands stroking her face and neck.  

The divine glide of his lips over her collarbones, those warm kisses tingling upon her skin had Ella feeling heady right from the start. Her hands toured his back, delighting in the play of such hard muscles, his own gliding down her sides as she arched against him, the prickle of his teeth at her nipple jolting her, lips sucking, tongue swirling.  

His mouth lowered, the press of his hands at her waist tightening, the circling of his tongue around her navel evoking a spread of heat to flush through her core. He lowered more, kisses sprinkled just above her pubic mound, gently biting where her neatly trimmed, blonde curls grew, growling, making her giggle. 

She anticipated his toying of her, her body jolting with need against each press of his lips. “Don’t you dare tease me.” She prodded his cheek, James biting her finger, sucking it into his mouth.  

He chuckled deeply. “I’m not.” That gravelly rumble, it made her heart skip several beats. “I’m enjoying you. Now, shut up and let me take my fucking time, innit.”   

Moving back up, he began leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses over her chest and down her sides, keenly watching her skin bounce, goosepimples summoned forth, the faintest of moans slipping from her parted lips. Just that alone had him waging battle against his own resolve, not to give in to the thirsty longing he harboured to wrap his mouth around her cunt and suck.    

He set his teeth against the rise of her hip, a sharp nip shocking her, the swirl of his tongue soothing, his lips gliding to her inner thigh. The scent of her was beyond comprehension to his burning senses, Eden stirred within him.   

He watched her while running his tongue up her thigh, the pleading in her eyes, the soft, lustful quakes of her heavenly body. Kissing his way back down again, he teased her slit with the quickest, briefest of licks, not even delving to the pink splendour within, mouth gliding up her other thigh.    

Heat trickled down her spine at the promise of where his mouth would settle, her pulse rapid, breathing escalated, his hands stroking her legs as his tongue toured the rise of her hip.  

“This is teasing, BFG.” 

He shrugged, moving his long curtain of hair until it splayed over his scratched up back, grinning smugly. “Be patient, little.” 

Pushing her legs further apart with a strong press of his hands, his mouth began to lower, not able to hold himself back. Each kiss from her hip to her pubic mound was placed slowly, agonisingly slow, little flicks of his tongue making her quiver, until he levelled with her sex and finally, took a long, languid lick.    

The noise she made caused his cock to throb, the softest of moans, kissing at her before his hands moved to spread her open, his tongue delving right in, the sensation knocking her sideways. He might have already had his mouth around the petals of her sex multiple times that night, but he was so damned good at it, it was like the first time every time.  

His tongue rolled a slow, firm circle around her bud, eyes opening, watching her as she viewed him, his lips wrapping to suck. The action had sparks crackling through her, the softest of exclamations leaving her mouth as her hips twitched. She felt like she was burning in water and drowning in fire, her head thudding back on the bed as her hands rooted into the silky midnight of his hair.  

His fingers held her spread, tongue circling at her opening, groaning at the taste of her silky arousal, dipping inside her, the heat of her core astounding to his senses. Another long drag from the flat of his tongue had her mewling, her back arching from the bed, heaven surging through her strongly.  

She keened against each lick, her muscles tensing as he began to focus in on her clit again, tongue swirling her little, potent bud, her moans escalating as glimmers shot through her, James chuckling gruffly as he witnessed her spiral. “Does that feel good, babe?”  

“I... oh... fuck!” she tremored. His sexual gifts lay very much with his mouth, as his girlfriend knew well by that point.  

He licked at her keenly, her clit swelling against the wet heat that drove cool fire throughout her, her body buzzing as her breaths escalated, his cheeks hollowing as she hissed out a moan.    

One hand gripped her thigh, the other moving to plunge two fingers inside of her, his response at the viscid clench a sharp bite at her inner thigh. Ella shook, her head spinning with the sheer eroticism of it, of him. His fingers curled and crooked, stroking her deftly, seeking her sweet spot and pressing hard when he found it, evoking a shrill cry.    

Those cries continued with every breath as he began to build her, the lightning bouncing beneath her skin as heat sizzled up her spine, her legs tensing. He worked his tongue against her faster, exorcising her release as she shook uncontrollably, her hands tugging at his hair. The heat of it snapped through her like a summer storm, tumbling through throbbing bliss as she came, left shaking in the wake of it.    

He took his time, returning his mouth to hers, trailing kisses all over her body, Ella still panting hard when his lips finally captured hers again, her hand gliding down his chest, the gentle drag of her fingernails making him shudder. When she closed her grasp around his cock, his chest tightened, groaning low, biting her nipple while she turned him onto his back. Moving astride him, she guided his cock to her, sinking down, her mouth dropping open.   

She was a little sex sore, but god, that did not mean she wanted to cease. He sat up beneath her, arms tightening around her as she slowly began to rock against him, hands flexing upon one another, tongues entwining when his lips returned to hers. 

She was spread wide around him, the aqueous clench of her cunt pulling him in, flexing softly, splitting her until she saw sparks. She hissed as he pushed up a little deeper into her, rutting her fully, moving his mouth to hers. “You’re so fucking beautiful.” he whispered, one hand moving to stroke her cheek as their kisses deepened, both feeling as if they were riding the crest of a sun kissed, sparkling wave. 

His kisses were devouring, the stroking of his hands consuming, his hips rolling in perfect sync with hers, Ella feeling overcome by him, that moment, everything. How could a union so perfect exist? With him, it was beyond euphoria, gilded in nirvana, a rush of unstoppable glimmers.  

The rhythm, the roll, the heat of it, it bordered on almost intolerable. Her nipples were sucked on in turn, James moving to lay her on her back, driving into her hard, his hand clasping her jaw, turning her head to demand more kisses. He stole them from her lips thirstily, tongue swirling with hers, his groans barbarous, making her walls pulse around him, his cock dragging slowly.  

He held back the desire to pound her into the bed, to just enjoy the skitters of slow ebullience, but it slipped from him as he watched her, pulling her legs back against her chest. The sight of her cunt splayed, glistening and hot around the thick of him, those moans… how she had him fixated entirely, in just the way she softly moaned. Those sweet purrs were the catalyst to him speeding up each thrust, watching her mouth fall open, hand gently gripping her throat before feeding her his thumb, watching her suck it.    

“Fuck me harder, please.” she breathed, licking the tip of his thumb, her eyes a blaze of lust and everything that was sin-drenched beauty. Her words shot right to his hips, and he did as she demanded. He fucked her so hard, she screamed, the pleasure of it daggering, her insides crammed so full of his thick cock, every nerve ending alight with sizzling pleasure. 

“Fuck, you look so fucking pretty when you’re getting shagged ragged.” His eyes closed tightly as he felt a wave of utter bliss lap against his spine, rolling through him as he came deep within her, knocked sideways by the force of his orgasm, grinning as he leaned to kiss her.  

She couldn’t answer for wailing, James winking at her through a very satisfied smirk, loving how much she was thriving on it.  

The twitches of his cock took her there, sent her to the edges of euphoria, her nails dragging his chest, the rumble of his groan causing her insides to throb. He slowed a little, kissing her ankle, giving her long, more contained strokes, his thumb moving to begin rubbing pure sparks of pleasure at her clit, Ella completely lost to the rapture of his fuck.   

“James, you’re... still hard?” 

He looked down at his cock and then back at her with a wink. “It happens sometimes, I can come and keep going. Don’t complain, innit.” 

Complain? Oh, no. Never.  

After a few moments of slowness, power and speed drove him wildly once more, her soaking walls flexing around him, his thumb rubbing with more purpose as her flutters became harder on his cock. His eyes never left her as she came again, her body arching off the bed, consumed by a bonfire of pleasure. He slowed to allow her to recover, moving to begin kissing her neck, his hands running through her glossy, blonde tresses, the little quivers of her body against him scintillating beyond words.    

The pleasure kept prickling at her, biting, sharp, his cock daggering her a little quicker again, mouth moving to indulge upon her throat, his teeth leaving red crescents from soft bites, his groan deep. He arrowed her with all-in, all-out thrusts, a slight rotation of his hips making her soar through endless constellations as her still sensitive walls were split wide around him.    

“I think you need to get on your back,” she suggested, James’s eyebrow arching curiously.    

“Nah. I like having you pinned.” She had ammunition for such a notion.  

“Oh, don’t want to watch my tits bounce while I ride you into the bed then, no?” He knew he was being played, but he was willing to let her. Clutching her body to his, he turned over, Ella pushing herself up and sinking down further, the depth of him incredible.    

He expected her to be frenzied as she leaned down to kiss him, her hands touring his chest, squeezing his nipples, her mouth moving to his neck and pecs before she straightened again. Instead, she began by giving him deliciously teasing alternation, riding him rapidly one minute to slow right down the next, delighting in the thick head of his cock dragging her creamy heat slowly. How she fucked him was simply mind-melting, sparks crackling, making his heart thunder, his groans causing her insides pulse with desire.  

He rolled his hips up, rutting her deep, pulling her down to share heated, syrupy kisses as he trawled her cunt, her slick muscles twitching around him as he stroked her breasts, pinching her nipples into stiffened peaks. He’d never fail to feel proud of her, that he was part of the reason why she now loved her body and had confidence in it instead of hating something so beautiful.  

She rode him with a hard grind, her nails stroking his chest as he gripped her hips, loving the view of her atop him. A soft gasp spilled from her throat as he moved his hand, thumb at her clit again, groaning gutturally as she moved against him in the most sexual serpentine he could remember experiencing with a woman. Lord, she was good.    

They both began to climb the ladder leading to nirvana, ascending, glowing, moving determinedly as they chased their releases. Sweat gleamed their bodies, Ella’s voice breaking a howling cry as he propelled himself up into her faster, his fingers at her hip digging in hard as he felt himself towed headlong into bliss.  

He groaned wantonly as his cock twitched, his thumb frantic at her clit, wanting to take her with him into the realms of utter beauty. Nerve endings throbbed until it was upon them both, glimmering rays rising, his sunlight illuminating her horizon as she cried out uncontrollably. Each clench milked the release from his spasming cock, filling her with cum, his growl all gravel, eyes closed, breathless, swimming in ecstasy as she collapsed atop his chest.    

They were asleep within ten minutes, Ella waking up with a sizeable hangover at just gone half past ten the following morning, still on top of her boyfriend beneath the covers. The room was freezing, a very bleary James rubbing his face as he stirred, muttering something about tea as she pulled on fresh knickers and one of her big sweaters, leaning to kiss him.  

“I’ll be back with it in a minute.” 

“Nah, I’ll be with you in a sec. Gonna need a fat joint to smoke. Head is fucking ruined. Ugh. I ain’t getting drunk again.” She could believe he likely meant it, too. It was no mere idle threat from the size of his hangover.  

Leaving the bedroom, she clicked the boiler into life, the November cold very much felt in the flat when the heating went off. Filling the kettle, she looked over to the sofa to see Snedders beneath blankets, his soft snores filling the space, coming round the side of where the counter ended to check on her sleeping guest. 

The airbed was vacant of Andrea.  

Bolting back to the bedroom, she pointed through the doorway, eyes wide as a naked James was pulling himself into his jeans. “We have a situation! A big time situation of the Andrea not being on the airbed type!” 

He closed his eyes with a small groan, his laugh rumbling. “He’s a bad lad.”  

“He’s a fucking man whore!” she cried, moving from the room again just as Steve’s bedroom door opened, the man himself walking out casually, still in last night’s clothes.  

“Alright, Ells,” he chirped, taking two mugs and beginning to decant coffee and sugar into them. “Surprised you can stand up with the fucking nailing Jim was giving you through the small hours.” 

“Innit,” her boyfriend smirked, heaving himself up to sit on counter. 

“Less of my sex life! You’ve been in there with my friend all night!” she charged him with, pointing at him sternly. 

“Yeah, I have. Proper fucking knackered, too.” 

“Steve!” she growled, smacking him between the shoulder blades. 

“Oi, calm it, Greenhall! Ain’t what you’re imagining. We stayed up talking, just talking, until about eight. She’s quality, your mate.” Folding his arms, he then arched an eyebrow. “That’s all we did, ask her yourself.”  

“He isn’t lying, Ella,” Andrea called. “He was the perfect gentleman. Well, as much as he’s capable of being."  

James’s face was a picture of confused. “You’ve had a woman in there all night and you didn’t shag her brains out?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Who the fuck are you and what have you done with Steve?” 

He laughed, pouring water into the mugs, adding milk to Andrea’s and giving them a quick stir. “See you two later.” With that chirp delivered, he made his way back into his bedroom, something Andrea muttered making him guffaw with laughter. Ella and James could only share perplexed looks.  

“But he's... and she... and...” she stated, gesturing with her hand at Steve’s now closed again bedroom door. 

“I think we’re still asleep, babe, because nah. Ain’t no way he wasn’t bouncing her on his dick for half the fucking night. That’s top grade suspicious behaviour, innit?” James spoke, rubbing a heavily ringed hand down his face with a slight groan. “We got any paracetamol? Fucking need some. My head hurts. Total bullshit, this hangover crap.” 

She was mid-way back from fetching the pack from the bathroom when the phone began to ring, racing to grab it so it didn’t wake Snedders from his slumber. 

“Hello?” 

“Ella, it’s Carole. Is my son there?” 

Her stomach dropped instantly, walking with the cordless phone and handing it over to James. “It’s your mum.” 

Taking it from her, he had two simple words. “Fuck off.” Clicking the button, he placed it down, shaking his head. “She needs to understand I’m done with her shit.” 

Ella could hardly blame him for that, returning the phone to the base unit, seeing it begin to ring again. “If it ends in two one two eight, it’s her again.” James called to her, Ella checking the display to see that it did, cancelling the call.  

Carole tried another four times that day, being hung up on every single time. Those calls continued to persist over the next week, every time the same. From James’s standpoint, he was truly done with her nonsense. His mother, though, was nothing but a very adamant woman. 

[nerdyreaderpapi]

Oh how I missed my babies Adrien and Jade!

1) I absolutely love how Adrien calls Jade “baby love” and “moo” to me they’re such cute nicknames!

2) OMG MY BABY JADE!!! I’m so so so proud of her, and I’m so happy she has such supportive and loving people around her! I’m truly proud of how far she has come and her being nominated for her hard work is amazing! She deserves all the best! I love Adrien’s reaction to the news and I love how he always supports her!

3) Jen!! My baby, I love seeing her appear in chapters! And I’m so happy she found Mr. Right, truly she deserves all the happiness in the world. I truly hope she gets treated right in her marriage and wishing her tons of happiness and success! I’m so proud of her, and her support for Jade is so wholesome. They truly are like sisters!

4) “Dented wife you can handle, dented wallet not so much” that made me giggle 😭😂😂😂 I love how they can play around and joke with each other all the time! They have the moments where they need to be serious and they also hav e their goofy side and I love how you always being that side out of them! It’s truly beautiful!

5) ‘there’s no way in hell I’m letting you near my dick with those. No way. I’m already circumcised; I ain’t looking to lose any more.’ ADRIEN!! 😂😂😂 oh this man never fails to make me laugh, so I see Jade has some claws now that scare him!

6) Stevie and Reece! They’re so adorable and I love how they love their uncle Adrien, he seriously seems like the best uncle ever! Him picking them both up in his arms and his conversation with Reece and Stevie was adorable 🥰😭😭

7) BABY MAKING!!! Yay! I’m so happy for them, I can’t wait for when the times comes when they’re parents! They’re seriously going to be the best, I can’t wait to see that side of them and how they adapt to a new chapter of their lives!

8) I love that Jade and her sister can talk so openly and there isn’t this awkward wake up between them! I love seeing and reading sister relationships like that, where they can be open and spill things without it being weird! I love their bond so much, and Rachel giving Jade some advice was super sweet as well! I love them both so much

9) Marco is absolutely hilarious! Him wanting to know all the details and him flirting with Adrien is absolutely funny. I love their family bond!

10) Adrien telling Jade to buy that underwear in black and something else in red!! Oh boy it most definitely got hot in her, a few times throughout this chapter actually! But I absolutely love it!!

I love this story so much, I love the emotions, the happiness, the sadness, the worry, the scare, the anger you provide through these characters! Honestly it’s all beautiful and so so well written and you truly do feel every emotion coming from each character, and I love the relationship between Adrien and Jade and the relationship they have with each other’s families, it’s fantastic!

Thank you so much for your lovely work! I can’t wait to catch up and read more 💗💗

Sky Full of Stars - Chapter Twenty Two.

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen Eighteen Nineteen Twenty Twenty One

Tag list - In the comments

Words - 3,944

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI!

January 23rd, 2016. Cleveland, NY. 

The soft patter of snow, the contented snorting of horses as they ate their breakfast and the clucking of hens. These were the only noises that reached Adrien’s ears as he enjoyed a peaceful morning in his studio, standing back from the large canvas he was working on, deciding where to begin as he drank his tea. Until he heard a third, the studio door opening behind him.  

“How’s Saxon’s hoof looking this morning, baby love?”  

Her beloved Friesian horse, a black giant with a mane that touched his shoulder, had been lame for a week. The root cause? An infected hoof that needed drawing with a poultice twice daily, the stench of the black gunk that ended up in the special hoof boot the foulest thing he’d ever smelled. Poor Mia. She was bereft without her playmate out there in the paddock with her, too, kicking up her heels in the snow with no buddy to charge around with since Saxon was on stable rest. 

“Jade?”  

Turning, he saw her moving towards him, her eyes glazed over, mouth hanging slightly agape. “Honey, you look a little...” he trailed off, trying to catch her eye. Nothing. It was as if somebody had reached in and removed her brain, replacing it with a slow-moving hamster on a wheel.  “Are you okay?”  

The lights were on, but Jade Brody was not home.  

“Moo, before I have to shake you?”  

As it turned out, she was capable of shaking herself. “Sorry, baby. I just... I’m...” 

He nodded, winding his hand in a circular motion. “Those are some words. Care to add a few more?” 

“I... I...” She was still partially stuck in daze mode, so stunned, she had truly been rendered speechless. “I just heard the Oscars nominations, and Five Marked Men more or less swept the board.” 

“It did?” he spoke, his face brightening. “Well, of course it fucking did. It’s an amazing movie!”  

“Yeah, yeah,” she continued, “best picture, best original score, best production design, best director, best actor nomination to Robert De Niro, and best actress in a supporting role nomination... to me.”  

His eyes almost fell out of his head. “Holy shit! Holy fucking shit, Jade! This is huge! Oh, my god, come here!” He threw his arms around her, lifting her up, laughing with utter delighted joy. “I’m so proud of you, Burtie!”  

Finally, she began to smile, but still looked to be in a state of shock. “How... how the hell did I do this? I can’t even... it isn’t processing!”  

He remembered that well. “It didn’t with me either. I remember hearing I’d been nominated and thinking they’d made a mistake, had the biggest case of imposter syndrome right up until I was actually walking towards the stage to accept the award.”  

“Yeah, yeah but you’re an amazing actor who had seventeen years of this behind him when he won! I’m just some bird from Tottenham who shouts a lot and decided to do this on a whim one day!” 

He raised an eyebrow. “One day about, hmm, seventeen years ago this year?” 

“Bloody hell.” 

“I am so proud of you, baby love,” he spoke, placing her back down and giving her a huge kiss. 

“Bloody hell!” 

“Are we stuck on bloody hell mode?” he teased, his wife’s mouth dropping open, closing, and then repeating all over again. 

“Bloody hell.” 

He couldn’t keep his laughter in, not able to remember a time he’d seen her look more stunned than she did right at that moment. “Burtie, your ass is ringing.”  

Shaking herself, she pulled her phone out, putting it on speaker. There wasn’t even chance to say hello before the verbal explosion hit her.  

“Skippy! You fucking superstar, oh my fucking god I am screaming!” 

“As I hear,” she just about got chance to say, Jen’s excitement vibrating the speaker of her iPhone.  

“Congratulations! I swear, you’ve won it, it’s you! You were perfect in that movie, made a tough ole’ boot like me cry, y’know? Made me feel all the damned emotions, so yeah, and I’m blabbing but I can’t think straight because my best fucking friend got nominated for an Oscar and oh my god!” 

“Jen, my ears, darlin’?” she was just about able to make out, the sound of a slightly deafened Nick in the background. “Jade! Congrats, babe! This one here hasnae been able to stop screaming about it yet!” 

“As I hear, mate!” she laughed, she and Adrien leaving the studio and walking back around to the house, hand in hand.  

“Ahh, well I’ll leave you and the missus to it, like. Gotta head out in all this bastard fucking snow and buy milk because my fucking wifey here cannae remember shite! Laters, hon.” 

Yes, a few things were different in her surrounding world, one of the main changes being that Jen had finally met Mr Right. Nick Anderson had come into her life as a brand-new drum tech two years prior, when the girls had embarked on another world tour back in twenty fourteen, the pair hitting it off so well that they’d ended up together quite quickly. Two impossibly energetic people with huge, lovely personalities who thrived on beating the hell out of a drumkit. They were perfect for one another and had married just eight months before right there at Stone Barn Castle.  

Originally hailing from the small skiing town of Aviemore in Scotland, he’d moved out to America ten years before with the first Mrs. Anderson, their marriage not lasting for long after the move. A number of factors had put the death knell upon it, the main one being what was actually a draw to Jen; he didn’t want children. Neither did she, no matter how much she genuinely adored small people, they just weren’t for her.  

Speaking of small people, Jade had to get moving pretty soon after entering the house and having another coffee, still reeling from the shock news but having a full day ahead of her. Her sister, her husband Chris and their two children were coming up to stay for a few days, Jade tasked with driving to Syracuse to collect them from the airport.  

While that coffee was sipped at, she was studied, Jade catching his eye across the island. “What?” 

“Are you going to be okay to drive? Because I know the snow isn’t too bad and the roads are clear and all that, but I’m kinda anxious you might space out and end up wrapping your car around a tree. I neither want a banged-up wife nor for her to smash the hell out of her new ride.” He’d rather she didn’t either, not just because he obviously didn’t want an injured wife on his hands, but damn, a custom detailed Audi Q7 did not come cheap. 

She paused, narrowing her eyes over the steam emitting her coffee cup. “You care more about the car than me, don't you? Dented wife you can handle. Dented wallet, not so much.” 

“Damn,” he fumed playfully, clicking his fingers, “she got me.” Lifting his chin, the entertainment played on his face, guffawing when he raised her middle finger. “Oh, don’t be like that, baby love. With your goddamned talons.” 

She’d decided to give herself a manicure, her own fairly short nails all hidden beneath the long, pointy claws glued on and painted a neutral shade of nude pink. “You didn’t complain about them when they were buried in your back last night.” 

“Nope, you know I like a little scratching. I’m still nervous about them coming near my junk, though.” Nervous was somewhat of an understatement. When she’d shown him her literal handiwork, the first words out of his mouth had been ‘there’s no way in hell I’m letting you near my dick with those. No way. I’m already circumcised; I ain’t looking to lose any more.’ She’d made sure to be very careful while handling the goods later the previous night, yet he’d still flinched a few times.  

At least the animals of the Brody household appreciated the fact that their mom now came with the best scratching implements, though, the cats thriving, the dogs enjoying an ear scratch, and Mia and Saxon both appreciating the scritches they’d received that morning as she’d groomed them both.  

Making a flexing motion with her hand, she aimed it at his crotch, walking around the island to him, Adrien reversing at speed. “Stop this, no, Jade!” 

“I can be gentle. See?” she spoke, grabbing his arm and gently raking her nails over the bulge in his jeans. “See? It’s all tickly on your balls. He likes. Look at the face!”  

He still looked a little uncomfortable, finally relaxing when he did realise it wasn’t unpleasant. “Mmm. Prefer your mouth.” Leaning to her, his lips met hers, grumbling happily as their tongues entwined, feeling his cock beginning to stir. “How much time do you have before you leave?” 

“Not enough for what you’re thinking, so you’re going to have to simmer, Mr. B.” 

He bit her lip with an annoyed growl. “Cock tease.” 

“Well, you knew this right from the moment we first met,” she reasoned, patting his abs and picking up her bag. “You can wait until later.” 

More growling. “Not even five minutes? There’s a lot a man can achieve in five minutes.”  

She paused, thoughtful, moving his hair and kissing the side of his neck. He’d grown it long, and god, how she loved it. “Save it for later.” Running her nails over his chest, she tickled his cock again, trailing them down to his thighs and then around to his bum before ascending his back once more, leaving him quivering. “Because later, I will follow everywhere my nails just went with my tongue.”  

Kissing him again, she left him standing there burning, muttering to himself. He had thought that perhaps the sexual magic of her might wane a little after just over six years together, but it truly showed no signs of abating. True, they weren’t all over one another quite as often as they had been right in the fledgling stages of their relationship, but mostly that was because of their careers putting distance between them.  

The fact that they couldn’t be together all of the time seemed to have kept the spark burning very brightly, he had to note. Even when she made his flicker and then walked away, just as she’d done that morning. He knew her game, though, getting him all amped up so it’d be in the back of his head all day. While she departed, he went down to the stables, a saddle and bridle in his arms, approaching a very happy looking Mia. 

“Yes, we’re going out. Come on, pretty face. Back up.” Moving her away from her stable door as he entered, he placed the saddle onto the door itself, putting her bridle on first. Between Jade herself and Bob when they were at their house in England, over the past few years he’d grown to become quite a competent horseman, even buying one for himself.  

Shamrock, also known as ‘that bastard animal’ lived over the other side of the pond in England, a huge, seventeen hands high former racehorse Adrien had found and loved, despite his predisposition to misbehave. He’d lost count of the number of times the nine-year-old steed had bolted with him, but if anything, it had made him a much more competent rider, having to get used to something so whip smart and predisposed to acting out.  

Riding Mia was a completely different ballgame, though, the horse more like a well-behaved sofa, as he often likened her. She was impeccably mannered and comfortable as hell to ride, Adrien jumping onto her back and gathering the reins, whistling for his dogs. It’d be a nice, sedate ride, not having to wonder about when the horse he was aboard was about to start huffing and puffing, jogging around or rearing up, all of which he did with Sham. Mia remained as much of a lamb as always. 

By the time his wife had returned, he was freshly showered and thawed out, coming into the kitchen as they were entering, having his favourite tiny person running for him as soon as she spotted him. 

“Uncle Adween!” At only fifteen months old, Stevie was still getting used to speech, some words beyond her grasp. Even her own name.  

“Beevs!” he laughed, lifting her into his arms and kissing her cheek, blowing a raspberry that had her squealing. She was commonly known at Beevs, Beevie or The Beev, being that she couldn’t pronounce Stevie. Jade she could say properly, but to her was aunt shouty, pronounced more as ‘showteeeee’. It still cracked him up. “How are you?” 

“Is cold and I no like it,” she told him, cuddling into his warmth as he greeted Chris with a one-armed hug.  

“Oh look, see look at this, being all cute for your uncle when you were a monster on the flight!” he spoke, shaking his head. 

“I no monsfer! I cute!” Oh yes, she was. Until she wasn’t. Until she was, as her father coined it, doing her best tiny Lucifer impersonation.  

“Kid, you are hell in a dress,” Rachel spoke, greeting Adrien with a big hug and kiss. “Look at this hair, bro! Woah! Suits you,” she then added, giving his curls a little comb with her fingers.  

“Thanks, Rach,” he replied, before having his ear bended by the incessant chatter of his tiny niece, his nephew Reece thumping against his leg after running for him, Adrien bending to lift him onto his other arm.  

“Can we go see the horses, uncle Adrien? Please?” At four, his speech was flawless, making his demands known in very good voice. “Please, please, please?” 

“Hey, quit nagging, tiny,” his mother advised, pinching his cheek, “we only just got here and already you’re starting with the overlord antics.” 

Reece looked thoughtful, cuddling his uncle, hiding beneath his hair. “But can we?” 

“And the chances of you shutting up until I say yes are?” he asked. 

The child made a tiny gap between his thumb and forefinger. “This much!” 

Replicating the gesture, he smiled, kissing his head. “Alright. Let’s go.” 

While her husband ventured back out with the kids, her sister and brother-in-law heading upstairs to get situated in one of the guest bedrooms, Jade made a start on lunch, chopping vegetables and taking the pre-shredded roasted chicken she’d cooked the previous night from the fridge, chicken noodle soup on the menu. Once they’d eaten, the kids were once again full of energy and soup, tearing around the garden with their daddy and uncle, Jade and Rachel watching from beside the fire in the kitchen.  

“He’s great with them,” the latter spoke, nodding at where Adrien was assisting with the building of a snowman. “He’ll make an amazing daddy someday.” 

Jade hummed, her mouth tilting upwards. “Hopefully sooner rather than later.” 

Oh, how she loved to just casually drop such news into conversation. “Oh my god, really? You didn’t tell me!” her sister cried, reaching to slap her knee playfully a few times. “Since when?” 

“Not long,” she confessed, sipping her latte. “I stopped taking my pill in October, but between not seeing him and never working out when I’m ovulating with any kind of accuracy, it hasn’t happened for us just yet.” 

“Don’t expect it to either,” Rachel warned lightly with a pointed finger, “I know we’re a fertile people, but still, it was seven months of trying for us before I got pregnant with Reece.” 

A fertile people was an understatement, with how fast their mother had become pregnant, and the rate their uncle’s had populated the family with their cousins, fifteen of them in total. Rachel herself had become pregnant with Stevie remarkably quickly, too. Well, it had been Stevie and her twin, but sadly the foetus had died at only a few weeks in. 

“Oh no, I’m not. We’re being fairly casual about it all, more like if it happens soon then great, but we’re not putting any pressure on ourselves.” Jade confirmed with a casual wave of her hand.  

While she and Adrien weren’t in a hurry, for years they’d been the focus of the public and media wondering why year after year passed and they hadn’t decided to have children. Truly, it was nobody else’s business, why they’d chosen to focus on their careers and their marriage before adding children to the equation, and that was the simple truth of the matter. People could think whatever the hell they liked, and usually it was a million miles from the truth.  

‘I will never understand why it is that society puts this enormous pressure upon couples to procreate within a certain time frame, or at all. It’s a perfectly valid choice to remain child free if that’s what you both want. My husband and I do want children one day, but us not starting a family yet is seen as something alien, that we desire to devote our time to each other and our careers. We’re both still young, we have plenty of time, yet our stance is seen as abnormal for some reason.’ 

Those were the words she gave in an interview just a year before when speaking with the journalist about the fact that they’d been child free for the duration of their five years, as it was at the time. The woman speaking with her was in staunch agreement, too, that the societal pressures for married couples to have children with an expected time frame was quite frankly ridiculous.  

“I have to say though, Rach,” Jade began, her eyebrows fluttering as a smile spread across her lips. “That baby making sex does hit different.” 

“Right?” her sister chimed, nodding vigorously. “Always does with men. Procreation horny is different, and I can’t explain why, but it is!” 

“Sends ‘em feral,” she agreed, looking out at Adrien approvingly. “All I have to say to him is, ‘get over here and put a baby in me’ and the speed he moves at,” she giggled, making a rapid motion with her finger coupled with a sharp whistle, Rachel in soft fits.  

“Oh, one thing, though? If you do start to seriously begin tracking your ovulation, don’t make it all about the baby making when you do have sex, because the novelty of it can wear off quickly and it becomes really focused on the procreation part, rather than the enjoyment. That put a dent in us for a while, back when we were trying to conceive Reece.” 

“Becomes a little mechanical, huh?” 

Rachel pointed, crossing her legs as she sat back in the armchair, Salem jumping onto her lap. “Yes, that’s exactly it and trust me, big sis. It dampens the spark as much as a few gallons of cold water.”  

Her advice was noted.  

“If you do want to go down that road, though, use an ovulation tracker app. Just put your details in, date of your last period, etc, and it calculates it all for you and then sends an alert when you start ovulating. Here, this is the one I used.”  

Taking her sister’s phone, she had a look at it, picking up her phone and downloading it before entering all of her info. “Oh blimey,” she exclaimed, resting a hand to her chest, “right now until tomorrow morning.” 

“Well, there you have it, but please, get those eggs fertilized quietly. I cannot with hearing the acoustics of my sister having sex. Not again.” 

Jade winked, flashing a grin of teeth. “I make no promises.” 

“Bleugh. Deviant.”  

“You have no idea,” she teased, Rachel’s eyes widening. 

“I fucking do! Mom told me all about the hook!” 

It might have happened five years ago, but god, how it still made her laugh. She couldn’t be in the kitchen pantry without having a little snort, remembering Adrien hiding in there after being stalked by her mother. “You have no idea how embarrassed he was. He’s so cute! He can be an absolute beast in the bedroom, and you just wouldn’t think it because he’s so quiet and nice.”  

“I’d rather not think of my brother-in-law like that at all.” she shuddered, sending her sister into another fit of giggles. Beyond a few little inquiries back when they first got together, Rachel was definitely more like her father where the topic of sex was concerned.  

Marco, on the other hand, had wanted to know everything. ‘So, what’s he packing? How many inches? Cut or uncut? Don’t you dare be holding out on me! I have to know the dick details! I’ve fantasised about this man!’ Yes, her brother had definitely been more uncouth at the time. He also flirted shamelessly with Adrien whenever he saw him, who took it all in his stride.  

Changing the subject, they instead talked more about their lives, Rachel once again relaying just how proud she was, that her beloved big sister had been nominated for an Oscar. Even hours after it had been announced, the news was still yet to sink in any further. Later that night, the house quiet, everyone in bed and Jade sitting up being her usual night owl self, it still hadn’t.  

“Baby love? You okay?”  

She had gone to bed, but that had been at 1am. After riding her husband into the bed and sending him into a deep sleep, she’d struggled dropping off at his side. Apparently, the sleep he’d found hadn’t been deep enough not to notice when she’d gotten up quietly half an hour later.  

“Yeah, gorgeous. Yeah, I’m fine. Just can’t seem to switch my brain off,” she replied, Adrien moving behind where she sat at the island on her laptop, wrapping his arms around her. “I’m still struggling to believe it’s real.” 

He could identify with that. “It’ll sink in, eventually. You have to know you’ve earned it, though, don’t you? Seriously, I’m not just saying it but I think it’s your best role to date. You deserve it.” Kissing her cheek, he rested her chin to his shoulder, looking at the screen. “Remember when I used to tell you, when we were going through never ending shit, how it’d get better? Well, better is here. It’ll be even better if you buy that underwear in black, too. Use my card.” 

In times of feeling a little out of sorts, whether good or bad, she shopped. On that particular night, it was the Bordelle website, her favourite lingerie brand. “It only comes in gold or dark blue. Which would you rather I’m wearing while you come in me?”  

Her dirty wit. How he loved it. “Definitely blue.” Reaching for the bowl of keys and general things to the side of the island, he grabbed his Amex card, handing it to her with a kiss. His eyes were then distracted by the next page. “Get those, too. Oh damn, and that.” 

“In red?” 

His smile widened. “Mm.”  

“Is this getting you all horny again?” 

Wrapping his arms around her again, she felt the evidence press against her spine. How the hell he was still so down to fuck at the drop of a hat – or the sight of sexy underwear, as it was – at nearly forty-two, she didn’t know. Okay, so he wasn’t exactly past it just yet, still young, but even still. He had the refresh rate of a guy half his age. She wasn’t averse to it, though. Obviously. 

After all, they had a baby to make.  

[nerdyreaderpapi]

THE WAY I LOVE ELLA AND JAMES SHOULD BE ILLEGAL!!

1) Andrea!! it’s always a pleasure seeing her appear in chapters! I love that she’s doing well, her being nervous to see Steve is completely normal! But man I was so excited to se them interact with each other!!

2) James teasing Andrea about Steve a little bit is so cute! I really love how they’re all like a family to each other, Steve and Ella have a great friendship and I love how Andrea and Hames are able to have a great friendship as well. Her also calling him a church burner is so funny😭😭😭 both girls call him that and it’s hilarious!!

3) STEVE IS SO FUNNY😭😭😭 “I’m being threatened to be good, but please know I don’t want to be” he’s such a comedian, I swear I always end up laughing whenever he talks!

4) STEVE AND ANDREA HUGGING!!! I can’t wait to see what the future holds for them! Truly, I feel like they could really be a good couple. I think now that Andrea has done the work on herself and knows how to control herself and I think if Steve cleans up his lifestyle, they could be really good together! Their meeting here is really cute!

Andrea being embarrassed about how the last time with Steve went is really adorable! And Steve making her feel comfortable about it and hugging her is touching my heart!

5) STEVE!!! “Gotta crack one out” LMAOAOA I TELL YOU THIS MAN MAKES ME LAUGH LIKE NO OTHER!! I love his personality. “Yeah, honey, I was thinking of you” way to make a girl blush Steve! I mean, I’m not Andrea but I surely blushed as if I was her!

6) Ella’s birthday gift being weed is so relatable!! best gift after James’ of course!

7) Ella smacking Steve’s bum is peak friendship core! I mean cmon, who doesn’t do that with their friends!

Steve telling them he’s gonna marry Andrea!! I’M ROOTING FOR THEM! Seriously, top grade couple right there. MY HEART EXPLODED💗💗💗 who knew Steve could be sappy and romantic!

Seen i’m even talking like James and Ella now and I’m not complaining one bit

8) “If I get to the point where I’m too drunk to come, I’ll be fucking you all night, innit.” ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM JAMES!! matter of a fact, I VOLUNTEER!! it’s so sad that he’s not real😭😭😭💔 true heartbreak!

9) James and Ella are definitely the hottest couple ever, IT GOT SUPER HOT IN HERE REALLY FAST! if we lived with them, we would definitely needs earplugs 24/7!! but I love them anyways hehehe

I absolutely adored this chapter!! I can’t wait to catch up and read more 💗💗💗 thank you for your lovely work you continue to do! I also saw that you have a new story going on!! I can’t wait to read the first chapter of it!! I’m sure it’s absolutely amazing like all your other work

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Sixteen.

Big thanks to my little audience for your continued support! :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,659

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

“Mate, I can’t.” 

Turning at the top of the stairwell, Ella raised an eyebrow. “Ands, come on. Don’t be all shy now.” 

“I am shy, though! The throes of sex addiction gave me some serious brazen oomph that I ain’t got otherwise! He’s on the other side of that door, the bloke I fancy the arse off of, the man I dived on!” 

“Andrea, it’s big girl pants time,” James spoke, leaning against the wall and shaking his head, trying not to find it so funny but promptly snorting with laughter at the look on her face. “C’mon. He’s looking forward to seeing you. And we’ve told him not to be as much of a tart as he usually is. Whether that’ll sink in or not, though, different matter, innit? If he gets too frisky I’ll just punch him in the dick. How about that?” 

“Don’t mention his cock!!” 

Her outburst had the couple in hysterics, Andrea still loitering, making a few groaned noises of discontent. “Would it really be that bad if you shagged him?”  

Ella shot her boyfriend daggers. “Of bleedin’ course, it would!” Many hand gestures followed, James booming with laughter. “She can’t have casual sex, and that’s the only type Steve has. Hello! Recipe for disaster incoming!”  

“Sorry,” he finally spoke through his laughter, reaching for Andrea and pulling her into a hug. “C’mon, mate. It’ll be alright. I’ll stop being a twat now.” 

She shook her head, her jaw tightening a little. “Impossible. Fucking church burner.” 

“What have I told you about calling me that?” He was met with a poked-out tongue, Andrea taking a deep breath before finally moving from the stairwell. James went first, opening the door and pointing right at Steve. “Fucking behave, innit.” 

As soon as Steve saw her, every nerve ending on his body lit up like a firework, remembering kissing the gorgeous redhead, even though only fleetingly. “Hello honey, I’m being threatened to be good but please, just know I really don’t wanna be.” 

“Oh god, he’s even hotter than I remember!” Andrea whispered as she hid against Ella, making a squeaking noise. “I’ll be alright in a minute, I will. I’m just... and you’re... and I set upon you when I was still probably at my worst and I’m embarrassed. Yeah.” 

Steve walked over, receiving a fist in the arm, a pointed finger and a look of warning from his best friend, holding his hands out to indicate his calmness. “It’s fine, Andrea. All jokes aside, it’s cool. We’re gonna have a damned good night for Greenhall’s birthday, and I’ll try to be good. C’mere, give us a hug. It’s cool.”  

Finally emerging, she gave him a little cuddle. God, he smelled amazing. He wore that Jean Paul Gaultier fragrance that sent her hormones wild. Also, though, she could smell something else desirable, but for different reasons. “Is that weed I smell?” 

“I gotcha, Andrea,” Snedders spoke, holding up the large joint. “Come take a seat. I got enough female trouble as it is, so look at me as little to no bloody threat, love.”  

She moved quickly to the side of the tall man with the heap of ginger dreads, taking the joint with thanks and having a few puffs. “Oh! I missed that! Can’t get it round by me, unless you want to be ripped off by the college kids.”  

“Gaz’ll be dealing tonight, pick up and eighth off him. He always has the best weed,” James spoke, taking his jacket off and moving to the kitchen to begin pulling alcohol bottles out. “Right, fuck it. I’m getting leathered tonight, fuck the fucking meds, man. I need oblivion.” He then paused, pointing at Ella without even looking at her. “Princess, don’t you fucking look at me in that tone of voice.”  

“What?” she cried, kicking her trainers and socks off. “I never said a word! Just promise me one thing, though. If you start feeling weird, switch to Coke. Please.”  

“I will,” he vouched, kissing her head. “Promise, innit? I just need not to have that bitch on my fucking mind.”  

Smiling, she moved the thick curtain of black hair and leaned to kiss the side of his neck a few times. “Cool beans, baby.” She could have argued it, she could have put her foot down, but truly it was his choice. Ella trusted him, too, and if he began to feel like hell, she knew he’d make the switch. Plus, he’d have all the guys from the band there with him, and through knowing them fairly well at that point, she knew they’d keep an eye on him as well.  

Now was not the time to worry. Now was the time to have fun.  

Snedders chose the musical accompaniment of the Pantera album Cowboys from Hell as they sat, smoking a little weed and having pre-drinks, Andrea relaxing as the guys made her feel welcome. She thought it especially touching that Snedders and Steve had gone and bought her an airbed to sleep on, since the former was still on the couch, meaning she’d have somewhere comfortable to sleep.  

“There’s earplugs under the pillow an’ all,” Steve spoke, pointing at James and Ella. “Trust me, you’ll need ‘em with them two. Fucking prolific shaggers, and your little friend there ain’t quiet.”  

Ella merely looked pleased with herself, sinking some more cider and bouncing on James’s lap before getting up. “Come on, Ands. Let’s go get ready.” 

“Yeah, see you in four hours, babe.” James teased with a wink. An hour later, and the three guys were very surprised to see the girls emerge from the bedroom all ready to go, all three showering and changing in the time the women of the flat had faffed with hair, makeup and outfits. As soon as James saw his girl, his eyes almost fell out of his head.  

“Shitting hell.”  

She thought he might approve at her choice. Black hotpants, her long sleeved, dark grey cropped top, fishnet tights, black over the knee socks and her high platform boots, plus one of his bullet belts slung around her narrow hips. Andrea had chosen a long, black dress with a split to the hip, a pair of borrowed army boots from Ella, her red hair tumbling free in curly cascade. It was met by approval, too.  

“Right, give me three minutes, lads and ladettes,” Steve spoke, getting up and heading for the bathroom. “Gotta crack one out.” The door shut, James and Snedders snorting in hysteria.  

“He’s not really going for a wank, is he?” Andrea gaped, pointing in his wake.  

“Yeah, he really is.” James confirmed, him and Snedders getting up. “Right, let’s go wait for him outside, yeah? He ain’t gonna be long, innit.” 

Andrea sat somewhere between flattered and humoured that she’d had such an effect on the man, picking up her bag and leaving the flat. To his credit, Steve was out with them in two, grinning, pointing at Andrea.  

“Yeah, honey. I was thinking of you.” He received a swift clip around the head from James, the taller of the men hugging him and telling him once again to behave. Andrea simply cussed under her breath a few times, allowed herself a fleeting five seconds of imagining being under him, then took a deep breath and counted to ten. She could get through this.  

What made it worse was that none of his usual ladies would be out that night, Hester working away for the weekend, the other girls all elsewhere, too. Still, though, Steve calmed himself down enough to actually walk along and fall into pleasant conversation with Andrea, Snedders, James and Ella all walking as a three while James gave a succinct rundown of the afternoon to his friend.  

“Aw, Jim. Fucking not cool, man,” he spoke, scratching his beard as he offered out cigarettes. “Don’t get it either, with your dad being such a top geezer but you mum, well... yeah.” 

“Innit,” he spoke, lighting up. “Anyway, bollocks to her and her shit. It’s my babe’s birthday, and we’re gonna have a fucking top grade night!”  

Walking into The Gallows twenty minutes later, Andrea understood exactly what Ella had meant when she’d told her that when you arrived with members of Nocturnal Descent, you were instantly seen. All eyes fell upon them, one set especially as he raced his long, tall form over. 

“Blondie!” Gaz shouted, running over, ducking down to lift Ella onto his shoulder and carry her off to the bar. “It’s ya motherfucking birthday!” With Gaz, you either went with his high-octane energy, or you learned to, the bassist placing her down and giving her a big hug before putting a pint in her hand, picking up one himself. “Now, I have to redeem myself. Race you to the bottom?” 

Ella clinked glasses with him before they both put them to their mouths. Out of their group, it was she who could down a pint at quickest speed, Ella’s record of eight seconds still unbeaten as once again she knocked Gaz into the shade.  

“Well, fuck me,” he exclaimed, shaking his head. “Making me look like a twat.” 

“You don’t need my missus for that, Gaz,” James winked, moving to put an order in at the bar, having a boot up his arse as he went. A round of shots and other drinks was ordered, a couple of shrill, excited screams behind him signalling Jane’s arrival, Lecter and Adam with her, too.  

The arrival of new friends Mark and Lizzie lead the group to find a table, pushing two together to fit everyone, Ella seating herself on James’s lap to make up for the lack of chairs, Jane not having the choice before being hauled onto Gaz’s. Not that she minded at all. With his boyish, cute face, bright green eyes and long mane of light brown hair, she was perfectly happy to be seated exactly where she was.  

Plus, he was newly single. Ding, ding, ding, jackpot.  

“Did I mention how fucking sexy you look tonight, the wife?” James asked, giving Ella’s leg a squeeze.  

He’d formed a habit there lately, of referring to her as the wife, although they were far from marriage just yet. She couldn’t claim not to love it, seeing it as a clear marker of his commitment to her and their relationship. “You were virtually dribbling on yourself when I came out of the bedroom, so like, yeah. That told me.”  

“Well, I’m shitting well telling you now, in as many words, innit,” he beamed, kissing her shoulder. Resting her forehead to his, she pulled a silly face at him that he returned, falling into happy kisses, feeling someone’s fingers push against her boot.  

“Birthday present!” Gaz spoke, Ella reaching to investigate. “Be discreet!”  

Inside the bag was an eighth of weed, Ella smiling and blowing him a kiss he caught against his cheek before tucking it further into her boot. She then burst out laughing at her sister’s face as Gaz bounced her on his lap, Jane thrilled to be receiving such attention. James nearly deafened her at the pitch of his wolf whistle when she turned and promptly welded her face to Gaz’s.  

“Nah, Jane. Don’t put your tongue in his mouth, princess!” he yelled. “You don’t know where he’s been!” 

“But we do!” Snedders called, Gaz waving two middle fingers around, not coming up for air for a while. Ella knew what her sister would be doing in the early hours, at least. Later that night, with the music blaring and her body all sweaty from dancing with her girls, she went to the bar, finding Steve there. 

“So, how’s it going, tart?” she asked, smacking him on the bum before moving to his side, Steve playfully snapping his teeth at her. “Everything cool beans with Andrea?” She felt two hands at her waist, leaning back against James’s chest, Steve looking over to their table and back at her again. 

“See that girl over there?” he pointed, beaming widely. “I’m gonna marry that girl one day.” 

The look James and Ella shared could have won awards for sheer comic value. “What the shitting hell?” the former announced, reaching to feel his forehead. “You feeling alright, mate?” 

He smiled, picking up his pint of Guinness. “Never better.” 

“You know she won’t shag you just because you say you’re gonna marry her one day, don’t you?” 

He nodded, sipping his drink. “I’ll wait. Trust me, that girl is an encyclopaedia on Tolkien and hammer horror films. Never found that in a bird before. And she reads Nietzsche. Yeah, man. My head got turned. She’s proper lovely an’ all.” Picking up Andrea’s drink, he went back to the table, Ella and James still sharing perplexed looks before she put in their order. 

“Pint of Strongbow and a bottle of Stella, please.” 

“Nah, cancel the Stella. Pint of Coke, mate,” James spoke, Ella giving him a look of concern. “I’m pretty fucking drunk already, but I’m alright. Don’t feel any way other than pissed and happy.”  

Those words made her inside heave a sigh of relief, since she’d been fretting over him in the back of her mind for most of the night. She’d wondered if everything with his wretched shrew of a mother would wear on him, but he seemed lighter for it, cutting ties with her. Perhaps it had been what he’d needed to do for a while, come to the conclusion, make that very hard decision. What Michael had told him was very true, though. You cannot change others, merely the way you react to them.  

They stayed at the club until 2am, leaving and instead of walking, James marching her over to a taxi. 

“It only takes twenty-five minutes to walk home, though,” she spoke, hovering at the side of the car. 

He gave her a look that was pure unfiltered sin, making her tingle somewhere very specific. “I can’t wait that long, babe.”  

It’d be her first time getting to enjoy sex with James while he was drunk, something that he had warned her over previously was quite a thing. “If I get to the point where I’m too drunk to come, I’ll be on you all fucking night, innit.” His warning truly was more incentive than anything, the pair all over one another in the back of the cab, as they walked up the stairs to the flat, Ella finding herself stripped of her top before they were even through the front door.  

Grasping her, he lifted her until she was clung around him, only making it as far as the kitchen units. Placing her down atop them, he yanked at her hotpants, messy, heated kisses shared, Ella pulling him from his t shirt before he sank his teeth into her neck.  

“Fuck, I want you so fucking badly.” he groaned, grasping her tights at the crotch and tearing them, the action sending lightning to fork through her insides, decimating her underwear in the same way as she undid his jeans. Those and his boxers only got pushed as far as his thighs, James dragging her to the edge of the counter, sinking himself into the hot clutch of her cunt with a deep groan as her legs tightened around his waist.  

“Ahhh, fuck,” she panted, dragging her fingers through his hair, “that’s exactly what I’ve wanted all bleedin’ night.” Their mouths met in a hungry clash, ecstasy pouring molten over her bones as he fucked her hard and fast, hands clutching her bum so hard, his short nails left crescents. Lifting her with one arm, his free hand shredded the remainder of her tights, bouncing her on his cock as he slapped her, handprints joining the nail marks, making her squeal as he carried her to his bedroom somewhat awkwardly.  

She was thrown onto the bed, both removing the remainder of their clothes, James moving to kneel between her legs and throw them over his shoulders, slipping back into her with an almost predatory grunt. Much to his displeasure, unlike most times when he was drunk, he began to feel those telltale tingles pulsing at the base of his cock, knowing he needed to calm down a little.  

Pulling from her, his mouth kissed scorching paths over her beautiful skin, every curve bitten upon, tongue sinking into the dewy warmth of her folds as his hands bracketed her waist.  

Her little gasps filled the bedroom, her feet coming to rest upon his wide back, Ella very content to let him be merciless with his tongue instead. “You always look so content with me in your mouth.”   

Letting go of the suck he had upon her with a little slurp, he pushed the petals of her cunt apart, the tip of his tongue beating quickly over her clit. “Innit, babe.” His tongue returned to tease licks at her bud, quick and light, followed by slow, firmly delivered rolls, Ella’s eyes rolling into the back of her head as it thudded back into the plush covers beneath them, a long, blissful moan fluttering from her mouth.  

And if he wasn't good enough at the actual act of ruining her with his mouth, it was how complimentary he was of her, too.  

“Do you have any idea how fucking pretty your pussy is?” he mumbled, long, slow licks sending lighting pricks darting up her spine. “Seriously top grade.” He’d told her that often, but she never got tired of hearing such affirmations.  

With James, she’d never felt so desired, his lips wrapping her clit in a snug suck, his eyes finding hers, winking at her as he increased the pressure, groaning as her legs began to quiver. “Mmm, yeah, darlin’. Come all over my tongue.”   

Her pants became urgent as the pleasure intensified, her hands gripping the duvet as her back arched. “Fuck, oh god!” With those gritted words, her waves broke over his shore, ceaseless tides flowing, her body humming with it as his tongue gentled against her, running up her inner thigh, his eyes finding hers.   

Leaning to her, their mouths connected in smouldering, dirty kisses, his hands gently squeezing the small, yet perfect rounds of her breasts, knocking the breath from her lungs as his cock arrowed right up into her.   

“Fuck, I love you.” He whispered, mouth upon hers again, Ella buzzing with the way scorching heat met the tenderness of their love, her own declaration knocked from her when he pushed so deep, all she could do was wail. Her hands clutched at the thick planes of muscle at his shoulders, anchoring herself to him as he wasted no time in beginning to dagger her cunt with speed, their tongues rolling against the other, panting hard, moaning low.   

His cock scraped sparks of pure, sinful embers against her walls, James slowing from the urgent veracity, his mouth at her neck as his hands slid to grip her thighs, his short nails marking the lily white of her skin with red crescents, dragging scratches. Speed spurred him once more, his eyes falling to watch his glistening cock spearing her rapidly, his heart skipping beats at the decadently erotic sound of her little cries, leaning to her, his mouth stealing kisses steeped in filthy indulgence.   

“Mmm, I love the way you fuck me, my sexy church burner,” she purred, her nails trailing his neck, losing herself to the heat of their kisses, panting against his tongue. “Never bleedin’ going to get tired of it.” 

He laughed quietly, moving his mouth, kissing her throat, teeth gently nipping her earlobe. “Never have to, either.” The way he felt about her, the bond they had that ran so much deeper because of how they’d met, James knew he would never, and could never part from her. She was his present and future.   

Instead of lying there and taking the pounding he gave her, she worked back against him, hips rolling in a figure of eight, sucking her fingers with a sensual moan, reaching to rub her clit, staring at him unblinkingly, lips flushed, chest heaving, looking like the sexiest thing he’d ever seen in his entire life.   

Wrapping her legs around his waist, she cried out each time his hardness hit her deeply, filling her entirely to the hilt again and again as her walls twitched and clasped around him, enveloping him in slippery warmth.  

Sliding his arm under her leg he then levered it up, her knee touching her shoulder and allowing for the kind of deeper penetration that made her virtually whimper with ecstasy, his hand gently clutching her neck as they continued to kiss. It was so hot, so erotically charged that she felt light headed with pleasure, crying out breathlessly, his public bone grinding against her clit with every single thrust that invaded her. God, he knew how to fuck.  

Looking up at him she felt her heart skip several beats, James resting his forehead to hers and running his fingertips down her cheek before he began kissing and licking the side of her neck, Ella closing her eyes, tingling ecstasy glimmering through to her marrow. It was heated, primal, raw sex, the type she’d very much become accustomed to, being with him.  

Her breathing became ragged as he began moving so hard and quick within her dripping wet walls, that his guttural groans of an all-consuming, white-hot orgasm were the catalyst to her own, both beyond control as they slipped over the edge, the build-up now giving way to the utter divine. Divinity was where they floated, catching their breath, James kissing her breasts as his chest heaved. 

It wasn’t the only time that night he chased her into such bliss either. Oh no. Never let it be said that drunk James didn’t have an agenda where sex was concerned, that agenda being to enjoy it until he physically couldn’t any longer.  

[nerdyreaderpapi]

Pregnancy Drabble

Little drabble to buy me some time because the fics ain't ready yet okay?? Taking inspo from this.

Warning: Pregnancy, Birth. Also I have no idea when it comes to baby weights so I googled shit.

Can you just imagine how snappy you'd be towards Simon during your first birth?

In your hospital gown when Simon helped you waddle your way onto the bed, all emotional and pissed because of the pain..

"Why did it have to have your big head?" You said, accompanied by a whimper in pain and frustration to your husband.

You were gripping his hand for dear life, he refused to tell you about the fact that your nails were digging into his palms even after back at home when you noticed the little subtle crescent shaped wounds left behind.

Simon couldn't even respond besides the stifled laugh, he knows he shouldn't take anything to heart.. you were irritable and understandably so.

One minute it was that and the next you were crying about having bigger stretch marks than you had before. During the check ups you came for, even the doctor herself thought that you'd be carrying twins.. low and behold the ultrasound, it was just one chunky baby who inherited Simon's head..

You almost passed out during the birth itself with how long you had to continuously push, you were a little out of it when it was time to hold your little one.. weighing in at 8 pounds and 12 ounces..

No wonder you felt that you could barely hold yourself up during the pregnancy, you swore to yourself that you are never putting yourself through that again.

Simon helped you hold them up after, his other hand in your hair as his thumb rubbed your scalp, comforting. He pressed his forehead against yours, staring down at the little miracle you popped out..

That vow was easier said than done because you now have two taller than average toddlers climbing their dad's arms and chest, along with another baby who is just pure chunk, the chubbiest cheeks with rolls of baby fat crawling up on their dad's leg..

My CoD Masterlist

Taglist: @wishesforyou @puff0o0 @simping4konig @simp4konig @blingblong55 @azereus @rustic-guitar-notes @snowdjinnofpalestine @09maruchan @anonymuslydumb @skeletalgoats @icarustypicalfall @ghosts-cyphera @connorsui @capuccino192 @miss-gms-and-the-rotten-womb @celestialhole @the-second-sage @starryylies @everlastingmoonlightsworld @keiva1000 @iexiam @drewsmuse @konigceo

[nerdyreaderpapi]

“I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Captain John Price x dying! wife! Reader

~2.3k words

TW: death, cancer, detailed descriptions of the cancer toll on reader, mentions of wheelchair, oxygen tanks and feeding tubes. (Cancer descriptions based on the loss of my grandmother.)

IN WHICH: John comes home from work to spend time with his sickly wife.

(I’d like to mention that I originally posted this fic on my last tumblr blog “shy-girl-moments” but it got terminated, so I wanted to re-upload on my new blog because I loved this so much.)

“Love, I'm home…!” John called out softly. It was unnerving with how quiet the house was considering his wife was usually happy and loud, only a week ago her cancer had worsened and left her reliant on a wheelchair. She was so tired and weak all the time. She had a feeding tube and was on oxygen at the same time.

John closed the door behind him and left his work bag by the door, purposely trying to be quiet in case she was sleeping. He looked around the house for any sign of his wife, eventually finding her sleeping on the couch with her feeding tube still connected and her wheelchair parked next to the couch. There was a cheesy romantic comedy movie playing in the background on a low volume. Since she hardly got the opportunity to leave the house, she often resorted to watching movies. Gently and slowly, John picked her head up and off the pillow and sat down, laying her head on his lap.

She groaned softly when John picked her head up, mumbling incoherently and stirring slightly, but soon settled back into her sleep. John smiled at how adorable she was. It saddened him to see her sleeping in the middle of the day but what choice did she have? She was terminally ill, her body was so exhausted that she slept most of the day even though she tried to fight it so she could spend time with him. John began softly stroking his poor wife's hair, hoping the comforting feeling would make it for her to stay asleep. Even the act of sleeping looked uncomfortable. She looked sick. The bags under her eyes were deep and dark, she was frail, and her voice was often sore, but she always tried to have a smile on her face.

John could see that she had her wedding ring clutched in her fist as she slept. Since she was losing a lot of weight due to the cancer, she had to wear her ring around her neck on a chain because it would just fall off her finger. She had a habit of holding it often as a sort of comfort. Price's eyes were soft as he watched the rise and fall of her chest. He had watched his wife’s health decline rapidly over the past few months. Seeing his wife so skinny and in pain had been hard on John but even harder on her. He had to stay strong for her. One of his hands continued to run through his wife’s thinning hair as the other slowly lifted her shirt. Her hip bones stuck out painfully from the thin skin and John traced them with his fingers gently, a sense of deep sorrow sinking into his heart.

A few minutes later she turned her head and nuzzled John's thighs. All was silent for a few seconds —besides the sound of her drip bag for her feeding tube and oxygen tank— then she spoke faintly, “John?” She opened her eyes slightly, looking up at her husband.

John felt his heart soften when he saw his wife’s tired and pained face. He loved his wife so much. Without hesitating for a moment he replied back to her, his voice was soft and had a tinge of guilt at seeing his wife in such a state but it was also filled with so much love, “Yes? I’m right here darling.”

She smiled weakly at John, taking another few seconds to speak again, “I… love you…” Another few seconds passed, “stay with me…”

John’s heart broke at hearing how quiet and tired her voice was. He felt the guilt rise in his body at the idea of him not being there for his wife, but he quickly pushed those thoughts from his mind when he noticed how she still had her wedding ring clutched in her hand. John gently moved his hands to run through her hair again, hoping the feeling of comfort would ease his wife.

“Of course I will… I’ll- I’ll always be with you. I love you too darling.” John said, the sadness evident in his voice.

“Kiss…?” She asked faintly, a look of love in her tired eyes.

John’s heart began to beat faster when he heard his wife’s request. It was so simple of a request yet it filled his heart with so much love. He didn’t hesitate to lean down and press a loving kiss on his wife’s forehead then another on her lips. He pulled away just enough to whisper, “There you go darling. You’re so cute…”

“Kiss.” She asked again, a bit more firmness in her voice and a faint, sly smirk on her lips. There was a glimmer of mischief in her eyes, too. It hurt John, knowing that she was using so much of her energy just to try to be silly.

“Oh, so feisty today?” John’s heart rate skyrocketed when he saw the smirk of his wife’s face and he held back a laugh.

It hurt John, knowing that she was using so much of her energy just to try to be silly, but it did make his heart flutter to see her smile again. He gave in easily and leaned back down to kiss her on the lips again. This time a little longer and more passionate, but still just as loving in nature as the first one. But he had a teasing smirk on his own face too, wanting to match her silly mood. She opened her mouth ever so slightly in an effort to deepen the kiss, smiling weakly.

John couldn’t help but smile when he felt her trying to deepen the kiss. Gently, he pulled away from the kiss leaning down to murmur against her ear, “Needy, aren’t we?” He teased jokingly before gently kissing his wife’s cheek and continuing softly, “You’ve gotta take it easy, darling. You’re still sick, love. And you know how easy it is for you to tire yourself out now…”

There was a faint blush on her cheeks, her eyes showed that she understood her husband’s words, but was still disappointed. “I love you…” she murmured again, not having the strength to argue even though she wanted to.

John smiled warmly at the blush on her cheeks. Seeing the beautiful rosy tint to his wife’s pale cheeks filled his heart with so much love. He loved every detail of her beautiful face and he loved to see that blush, even with how sick she looked.

“And I love you too darling. So stop trying to get yourself all worked up. I don’t want you doing more than just resting at the moment.” John insisted softly, gently stroking her thinning hair.

A few seconds later her closed her eyes and fell asleep quickly once again. It was obvious how exhausted her body was from the cancer, her entire body weak to the point of needing a wheelchair and a feeding tube. John felt a pang in his heart when he saw her fall asleep again so easily. The poor woman must’ve been so exhausted from just being up for a few minutes. John’s eyes ran down his wife’s body again and he could only feel guilt and sadness when he saw just how much weight she had lost. He kept one hand gently massaging his wife’s hair but his other hand gently moved to lift up her shirt again. He stared at the jut of his wife’s hip bones and tried to push down the feeling of impending doom.

John had to pry his eyes away from his sickly wife, turning to the TV for some type of distraction. The romcom she chose was her favorite, the one she watched over and over again, the same one she forced John to watch on their first date. She liked it because the love interest looked like John when he was in his teenage years. After about an hour of anxiety filled disassociating, John was suddenly aware that his wifes oxygen levels dropped drastically; slow, shallow, faint breaths. He immediately sat up right, very alarmed and scared.

“Darling?” He gently shook her shoulder, trying to wake her up but not startle her, “wake up for me. You’re not breathing right, love.”

She woke up after a second and furrowed her brows, taking a deeper breath. She glared slightly at John and pouted, clearly very annoyed, “w-what?”

John felt a rush of relief when she woke up and started breathing again. But his eyes narrowed at the pout on his wife’s face, “Don’t ‘what’ me. You weren’t breathing well again.” He paused for a moment before adding, “I can’t have my beautiful wife suffocating on me. You can’t scare me like that.”

She fought the urge to roll her eyes, but nodded slightly. It took her a long moment to speak, “sit me up… like the nurse said… so I can sleep…”

John let out a sigh when he saw the look in her eyes, noting the fact she was obviously restraining herself from rolling her eyes. He couldn’t blame her though since he knew his wife was in pain and extremely tired from just the act of being awake. He gently lifted her up and sat her upright on the couch again.

“There’s my good girl... now you can get proper sleep from now on. But if I hear you’re not breathing properly again, I swear I’ll go turn up the oxygen flow.” He said firmly, yet his touch was soft and comforting, there was no mirth behind his tone.

She just stared at him for a long moment, starting to tear up slightly, her pout deepening, “I’m sorry… for being cranky.” She mumbled, starting to take deeper breaths now that she was sat up, “I’m just… so tired.”

John’s heart shattered at seeing tears well up in his wife’s eyes. She was clearly in so much pain but was trying so hard to keep it together. He quickly wrapped his arms around his wife and held her close, gently pulling her into his lap.

“Darling, don't apologize. It’s alright. You’re alright.” He gently stroked her hair again while he spoke, “I know you’re tired… I know you’re hurting. I’m here though, I’m not leaving you, my love”

“I’m so tired… of being sick… and in pain… I want this to be over.” She hiccuped slightly through her tears, leaning into John’s comforting embrace, her head on his chest.

It felt like a knife had hit his heart hearing his wife’s words. The pain and exhaustion she carried was so obvious in the way she spoke, “I know, love… I know.”

He pulled her even closer to his chest and continued to rub his wife’s hair in a comforting motion. He knew there wasn’t much else he could do to help, but he wanted to try and offer something, “Just get some sleep for now. darling.”

She nodded, her tears slowly trickling to a stop as she nuzzled her face into her husband’s neck. John wrapped one arm around her waist to help hold her upright while his other arm continued to gently run through her hair. He leaned his head down to press a kiss against her forehead.

“There we go love. That’s it, just go to sleep now. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here when you wake up.” He murmured, his low raspy voice gently pulling her back to sleep.

Her breathing was even and smooth and the look on her sleeping face was peaceful, knowing she felt safe in her husband’s big arms. John watched as her breathing evened out into a peaceful and calm rhythm and it made his heart feel lighter again. Seeing his wife so peaceful and safe in his arms made his heart feel so full of love and warm. He sat there for a few minutes more just absorbing the feeling of his wife in his lap, then he too dozed off.

When John woke up, it was late in the evening, nearly dinner time. His wife was still cuddled up against him, completely still and a bit cold. His eyes were met with the sight of his sleeping wife still snuggled up against him. He couldn’t help a small smile at the sweet sight, but the smile quickly dropped after realizing how cold she felt against him. He gently shook her shoulder in a panicked attempt to wake her up.

“Darling, wake up for me real quick, love.” She didn’t wake up. John didn’t feel her breathing either and she was very pale. “Love..?”

John felt his heart start to pick up speed when he didn’t get a response. He again shook his wife’s shoulder but there was still no response. Panic started to set in as he carefully put one hand on her neck to feel if there was a pulse. There was no pulse and her body was starting to stiffen. John felt his heart stop beating, but he refused to accept it. He pushed the thought from his mind and kept going through the steps in his head. He pressed his fingers a little under her chin to tilt her head back and his chest tightened.

“Come on love, breathe for me…” he desperately begged, his voice shaky.

Her head lulled slightly in his hand, her head tilted up towards him, and John saw that she looked at peace… she was safe and calm for the first time in weeks. She almost looked as peaceful as she did on their wedding night. But now his wife is dead… no longer in pain. Reality really began to sink in for Price when he saw how still her chest was, unmoving, not breathing. He felt like any breath he tried to take was being caught in his throat. His heart felt so heavy and he realized he was crying. Slowly, John pulled his sweet wife back against his chest, holding her tightly and securely and gently began stroking her hair again, just like he had been a couple hours ago.

It was then that he finally spoke again, his voice nearly silent and thick with emotion, “I’ll be here when you wake up…”

But she never would.

[nerdyreaderpapi]

Hi!! Again, I’m so so so sorry for responding so late to these wonderful updates, things are still pretty fresh over here and I’m still getting used to everything that’s happened but I’m trying, and now that I have a free night I’m glued to my screen about to read all these new updates!!

1) THE CHAPTER STARTING OFF LIKE THIS!!? SERIOUSLY COOL BEANS!

“He hummed a chuckle against her lips, rutting her a little harder. “Yeah, ain’t you a lucky girl?” After he’d finished bouncing her around the bed, she had that confirmed even further, too.”

- James, seriously honey, I love you. My jaw was indeed dropped this this scene and I definitely feel the need to open a window or two after that🤭

2) He’d bought her favourite album by The Prodigy on vinyl for her, signed by all four members of the band.  

- JAMES IS THE SWEETEST MAN EVER!! The fact that he went out of his way to do this for Ella and knowing he might hav to start working as a bouncer again is seriously the sweetest thing ever! I love his and Ella’s relationship so much!

3) “My BFG!” she cooed, moving to straddle his lap and kiss him. “You’re the best! Thank you so, so much!” 

“You’re welcome, little,” he hummed, kissing her again and tightening his arms around her.

“And yeah, I’m coming with you to suffer the noise. Got us a hotel booked down there for the weekend and all that, too.”

- NO WORDS JUST MY COUPLE BEING THE SWEETEST EVER! I love the fact that Ella calls James her BFG! I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again, their nicknames for each other are so cute and I really love their dynamic! James willing to suffer through noise just to be with Ella>>> he’s my favourite!!

4) “Hi, Ella. I’m Sam, or dickhead, pain in the arse or twat, as my brother often calls me. Nice to meet you!”  

- okay I love Sam so much!! I’m sorry but this was just such a funny introduction 😭😭😭 him naming out all the things he’s often called and then finishing it off with “nice to meet you!” Is just so funny for some reason😂😂 he’s definitely one of my favourites!

5) “Because he loves it.” James hadn’t expected Ella to speak up, but there she was, her hand still squeezing his thigh supportively. “Because he wouldn’t be who he is without his music.” 

- yes Ella defend your man! I love how they always stick up for each other no matter what! I love this about them, and I love how Ella is standing up to his mother and isn’t letting her try and get James down!

6) “Oh, I’m glad to hear you’ve been paying your way and not sponging off my son. I thought maybe the reason he could have been going back to high risk, but high pay work was to support you both. I’m glad that isn’t the case.” Her eyes toured her, picking up her wine glass with a little grin. “Not that you eat much, though. You can’t be expensive to keep. Just as well, really, since you probably vomit most of it back up.” 

- THE GASP I LET OUT!!! HOW DARE YOU CAROLE OH GOSH! I am literally that meme with the fire blowing out of angers ears!! Oh man, reading that made me so angry, like Carole most definitely has problems of her own and I had a gut feeling from the start that I wouldn’t like her at all! This is such disgusting behaviour, but you know what, I’m actually glad that she’s showing her true colours again! So now they can leave her in the dust while they ride off into the sunset together

7) How James didn’t throw the knife in his hand directly at her head, he didn’t know, placing his cutlery down and glaring. “That was low. In fucking fact, mum, that was spiteful. I ain’t having that, nah.”  

“Good bloody lord, Carole!” his dad remarked, removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose. “There was no need for that. Ella, I’m sorry, sweetheart.” 

“Nah, tired of it, innit. You? You ain’t good for my recovery, you wind me the fuck up every time I have to share breathing space with you. Find someone else to pick at, because it ain’t me any longer and it sure as fuck ain’t my girlfriend either.”

- these three paragraphs I love so much! Because I love how all of them (Sam included I just forgot to add his paragraph) stood up to Carole and defended Ella but also calling their mother/wife out on her disgusting, disrespectful behaviour towards James and Ella. And I love that Sam and James dad aren’t the type to bow their heads and stay silent during something like this!

8) Ella totally frying James brain to the point where he can barley speak>>> totally cool beans my Ella heheh

9) STEVE!! I MISS YOU! “Happy birthday, Greenhall. Sorry it ain’t wrapped, I’m a bloke. I’m proper rubbish and all that!” I LOVE HIM SO MUCH, I love the friendship Ella has with James friends and I love that neither of them feel uncomfortable around each other! It’s like a found family! I love that so much!

Sorry this was so much! I had so much to say lol, and honestly this chapter has most definitely gotten me out of my sad mood! I loved it so much and the amount of love I have for this book is insane!

Thank you so much for your wonderful work and your kind words on the last post! It means a lot to me that someone is here for me, and I’m very sorry for the loss you suffered as well! I’m hoping that you’re okay!

These chapters are absolutely amazing! And I’m sorry but I probably will be spamming because I plan to catch up tonight! So sorry I’m advice 🤭

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Fifteen.

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,830

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

Twenty-three years old. In truth, Ella hadn’t really known where she’d be the year before, her denial and then acceptance of the need to recover herself at the forefront of her mind. Where she found herself was in a position few women would turn down.  

“Oh, fuck, yes, yes, ahhhh!” Her gritted statement was delivered on a bliss filled cry, highly enjoying having her insides rearranged as she was shagged ragged from behind by her boyfriend. Slowing, he grasped her shoulders, pulling her until her back pressed against his chest, mouth laying hot kisses at the side of her neck as his hands roamed over her. 

It shined golden through her, every wave of ecstasy elicited by the slow, deep punch of his cock, one hand squeezing her breasts and sliding to hold her throat, the other moving between her legs to begin stroking at her clit. With every roll of his fingertips, he pulled soft wails from her, teeth nipping her neck, sending little bolts skittering through her.   

“So, how’s your birthday going so far, darlin’?” he panted, Ella turning her head with a big smile, kissing him with smouldering sin. 

“Could be a lot worse than getting pounded by a gorgeous, thick cock.”  

He hummed a chuckle against her lips, rutting her a little harder. “Yeah, ain’t you a lucky girl?” After he’d finished bouncing her around the bed, she had that confirmed even further, too.  

“Baby! No! You didn’t!” she screamed, her mouth dropping open, James’s grin widening at seeing how thrilled she was with her gift. He’d bought her favourite album by The Prodigy on vinyl for her, signed by all four members of the band.  

“I did. Knew you’d die as soon as you saw it, innit. Oh, and you might wanna look inside the sleeve.”  

Curious, she opened it up, her mouth falling open again after pulling out two tickets to go and see them live at Kentish Town Forum in London the following month. The tour had sold out before she’d had chance to get any, so how he’d managed it she didn’t know.  

“My BFG!” she cooed, moving to straddle his lap and kiss him. “You’re the best! Thank you so, so much!” 

“You’re welcome, little,” he hummed, kissing her again and tightening his arms around her. “And yeah, I’m coming with you to suffer the noise. Got us a hotel booked down there for the weekend and all that, too.”  

With his money from album sales running quite low, it was truly more than he could afford, but she was worth it. Besides, he could easily go and pick up some work somewhere around recording their new album come nine days from then, Steve already returned to doing doorman work at various clubs and bars around Warwickshire. He’d done it himself in the past at The Gallows, so supposed he could ask Steve’s boss to hook him up with a few hours. It meant losing weekends around shifts, but it paid very well.  

It was The Gallows they were heading to that evening for Ella’s birthday night out, James half expecting her to want to go to a club that played pounding dance music until dawn. Her revealed plans had been very different, though. He couldn’t say that it wasn’t to his relief.  

After the incident when she’d been grabbed at while dancing on a podium, it had made her feel uncomfortable about returning to her beloved dance scene again, Ella beginning to find herself much more at home on the metal scene. Even the music was beginning to grow on her. Plus, it was well known now wherever she went, exactly who she was; War’s girlfriend, and if there was one woman you didn’t grab out of fear of having your arse handed to you, well. It was her.  

Also, she found that the blokes on the rock and metal scene were much more appropriate, too. Despite the common reputation of being uncouth hellions, she definitely noticed a difference in how she was treated.  

Take one night at The Gallows for instance, Ella walking back to her table from the toilets and suddenly finding herself halted by a man she didn’t know, rapidly removing his plaid shirt and tying it around her waist, whispering discreetly that her hotpants had split at the back. The man had introduced himself as Mark, he and his girlfriend Lizzie becoming fast friends with her and her little group.  

They’d be meeting with them that night, as well as her sister and Andrea, too, who they were collecting from the train station that afternoon after visiting James’s parents. Needless to say, the activities planned for afterwards were the ones he was looking forward to more that day. Apart from seeing his dad and sister, but he was dreading introducing Ella to his mother.  

“If she says anything thoughtless, just ignore her. Carole Kingston ain’t known for having a filter. I’d say she don’t mean it, like, but I’m not so sure any longer. Fucking shit stirrer,” he spoke as they alighted the car outside number forty-seven, Prescott Drive a few hours later.  

Halting him at the bottom of the drive, she grabbed his hands, giving his arms a little shake. “Come on, chill out a bit before you go in there.” 

“I’m fine, I’m chilled,” he spoke. 

Ella snorted softly. “That’s a load of bollocks, baby. You’re practically grinding your teeth. Come on, just breathe it out, relax.” Truly, she wanted it to go well for his sake more than hers, not wanting there to be any existing conflict for him to negotiate. It all depended on what mood his mother was in though, she supposed.  

He dropped a kiss to her forehead, grabbing her hand before walking up the drive past his dad’s car, the front door flying open. 

“Nah, Jimbo! What are you doing with such a pretty girl? Did she not bring her white stick and Labrador with her?”  

“Fuck off, dickhead,” he frowned, Sam throwing her head back with a squeaky laugh.  

“Hi, Ella. I’m Sam, or dickhead, pain in the arse or twat, as my brother often calls me. Nice to meet you!”  

Indeed, those were his preferred names. “Nice to meet you, Sam.” she spoke, James walking past her with a shoulder barge. 

“Out the way, skin!” he muttered, stopping to grin and then pull her into a hug. “What kind of mood is the duchess in?” 

“Not too bad, you know. Freaked out over cheese sauce. She’s made lasagne.” Immediately, his stomach tingled, wondering how Ella would cope with that, a food that was definitely placed on the scary category. It had to be said, though, she was getting better. She managed to eat rice a few times a week without issue, which was good since they had to make food money stretch.  

Moving through the house, they arrived in the large kitchen, the space extending around to a dining room as well. What had once been a modest council house had been turned into a much larger home, the extension built on by Ted, Alan’s brother giving a lot of space that hadn’t existed before, and a garden much easier to manage.  

“Alright, kidda! Ella, looking lovely as usual. Happy birthday, petal!” Alan spoke as he walked back in from the garden, handing her a card and giving her a kiss on the cheek. 

“Awww, thanks, Alan,” she spoke, opening it up, thanking him again after reading the message and finding a twenty-pound note kindly included, Carole turning from the sink. 

“Oh! You’re here! Hi!” Bustling over, she pulled James into a hug, turning then to Ella with a smile. “Well! You’re nothing like the last one, but that’s a good thing. Bright yellow hair, tattoos on her face and a flippin’ great big ring in the middle of her nose!” she exclaimed, the corner of her mouth twitching as she laughed.  

James supposed that was a compliment of sorts. Unless you happened to be Chrissie, his ex. His insides unclenched a little, seeing that his mum appeared to be in a good mood. It was what drove him up the wall about her most, the fact that Carole had the capacity to be a perfectly lovely woman, but all too often let her less favourable qualities get the better of her. 

Still, he knew how quickly she could find a fault and begin to pick at it. Like clockwork, it began over lunch, James noticing her eyes flitting to Ella at regular intervals, very observant over the smaller portion of food she ate.  

“Eh lad, I was out with a few of the fellas from work last night, saw Steve on the doors at that new club they’ve opened in what used to be the old Lloyds bank. When’d he go back to it?” Alan asked, placing his cutlery down and picking up his beer.  

“Not long ago,” he confirmed, crunching through a piece of cucumber. “He’s having a word with his boss tonight, seeing if he can get me back in it as well.”  

Carole’s eyes snapped to her son, pausing from chewing. “James, you aren’t seriously considering going back to being a bloody bouncer, are you?” 

“Yeah, I am. I’m good at it and it pays well. Only downside is losing my weekend nights, but it wouldn’t be every weekend. The shifts rotate,” he confirmed, reaching to tickle Ella’s cheek with his finger when she poked her bottom lip out. If there was one thing she loved, it was going out for a good time with her boyfriend.  

Her eyebrows rose. “Really? That’s the only downside? You getting glassed or worse by some pissed up idiot isn’t something you’re factoring in here?” 

“Ease up, love,” Alan spoke lightly, “he’s a big lad, he can handle himself. Then there’s the ole’ kickboxing, you’ve started that too now, right? How’s that going?” 

James thought it was commendable that his dad obviously wanted to move the conversation on from being something to gripe about. “Yeah, I really enjoy it. Only had two classes so far, go on Monday and Wednesday evenings.” 

“Learning kickboxing won’t stop you from being stabbed.” Oh, no. She wasn’t quite done yet. “Remind me how many times you had a knife pulled on you while you were working doors before?”  

“Three, and none ever got me,” he spoke, chewing the inside of his cheek with irritation.  

He watched her shrug, the corner of her mouth twisting. “I hope you’re not going back to it because underneath, you want them to. We’re not back there are we, James?”  

Ella’s eyes widened, gulping down her mouthful of food, reaching beneath the table to rest a hand on his thigh. God, he was right. No tact was to be found there.  

“I’d say I can’t believe you’ve just said that, but I can.” Fixing her with a hard look, he lifted his chin. “No. I’m not.” 

“Carole,” Alan warned, placing his glass down. “Don’t.”  

“Don’t what? Show concern with what ‘profession’ our son is seeking?” 

“I already have one of those,” the son himself stated, “but sadly ‘cos our corner of the metal world ain’t as lucrative as the more mainstream stuff, it don’t pay fortunes. I need quick cash until we get the next album done, get out on the road again and all that. Touring is where the main revenue is, innit.” 

“Then why in god’s name are you flippin’ doing it? Wasting your bloody time, you are!” 

“Because he loves it.” James hadn’t expected Ella to speak up, but there she was, her hand still squeezing his thigh supportively. “Because he wouldn’t be who he is without his music.” 

Carole wasn’t used to having her opinion challenged, no matter how politely. “What’s that then, Ella? A clinically depressed man who seems to be heading down all the wrong paths in his life? Choosing a career that doesn’t pay and sublimating it with a job fraught with dangers?” 

“Clinical depression is what he has. It isn’t who he is. Who he is, is a musician. A very talented one.”  

His heart bloomed, to hear those words. He’d known Ella for six and a half months and yet, she had a better understanding of him than his own mother. It spoke volumes. Carole, however, wasn’t to be defeated like that. Her words were delivered with the brand of cool snide the entire family were sadly becoming all too used to hearing.  

“So, where are you working at the moment, then? What’s your special talent, Ella?” 

James’s eyes fixed on her, his nostrils flaring. His girlfriend had hit her with something she couldn’t argue back against, so she’d changed track.  

“Currently, I’m not working. I start my new job next Monday, though. At the florist just off the high street.” 

“Oh, Bloomin’ Lovely?” Sam interjected, wanting to try and steer the conversation round. “I bought mum a bouquet from there for her birthday a few months back. The lady was so sweet, with all her bracelets and those crazy glasses and bright pink hair!”  

“Yeah, that’s it!” Ella confirmed. “And her hair is orange at the moment. She seems really cool.”  

“So, what have you been living off since you’ve been out, then, since you’ve only recently found yourself work?” Carole then questioned, the corner of her mouth upturning, thinking she had a win coming her way. 

Ella felt uncomfortable, but she wouldn’t be made to feel small. “I had some cash from my former job in the bank.” 

“Oh, I’m glad to hear you’ve been paying your way and not sponging off my son. I thought maybe the reason he could have been going back to high risk, but high pay work was to support you both. I’m glad that isn’t the case.” Her eyes toured her, picking up her wine glass with a little grin. “Not that you eat much, though. You can’t be expensive to keep. Just as well, really, since you probably vomit most of it back up.” 

How James didn’t throw the knife in his hand directly at her head, he didn’t know, placing his cutlery down and glaring. “That was low. In fucking fact, mum, that was spiteful. I ain’t having that, nah.”  

“Good bloody lord, Carole!” his dad remarked, removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose. “There was no need for that. Ella, I’m sorry, sweetheart.” 

She nodded, but inside felt her stomach turning over and over, unable to believe how unpleasant the afternoon had turned. All because Carole was wrong and couldn’t stand it. 

She shrugged, sipping her wine with nonchalance. “Don’t apologise for me. I’m not sorry for pointing out the truth.” 

“Mum, stop it. You’re only embarrassing yourself,” Sam groaned, combing her fingers through her short, bobbed hair. 

With those words, James made a decision, looking across the table to see nothing but smug glee from a woman who truly should have been nothing but ashamed for the way she’d just spoken. If only her ego would let her.  

“And that’s the last time I step foot in this house.” Standing up, he turned to Ella, reaching for her hand. “You can’t help yourself, mum, and deep down I don’t even think you want to. I think you enjoy provoking reactions. Alright so fine, I obviously didn’t grow up to be the son you wanted. I’m a basket case of a black metal musician and that pisses you off, but Ella ain’t done fuck all to you.” 

“James, that’s not...” Carole began, but her eldest had truly had enough. 

“Nah, tired of it, innit. You? You ain’t good for my recovery, you wind me the fuck up every time I have to share breathing space with you. Find someone else to pick at, because it ain’t me any longer and it sure as fuck ain’t my girlfriend either.” Walking around the table, he grasped his dad’s shoulder, telling him he’d see him soon, dropping a kiss to Sam’s head and pledging her the same.  

He was about to leave, turning back suddenly. “You know what? One thing I’ve learned in therapy is that with mental illness, sometimes people with a mentally ill parent are more predisposed to it, like. Maybe you might wanna go get whatever the fuck it is you’re suffering from checked out, save you losing any other members of your family, yeah?” 

“Oh, shut your mouth, James! How flippin’ dare you accuse me of that! You’re the crazy one here, not me!” 

Now she’d really done it, the bile in him rising sharply. “Drop dead, you vile old twat.” 

Leaving the house, the first thing he did was take Ella’s face in his hands and kiss her, wrapping her in a huge hug. “I love you so fucking much. I’m sorry she chose today of all day’s to be such a cunt to you. Gave me the push I’ve needed for a while, though, innit. She ain’t no good for me, so I don’t want nothing to do with her.” 

Her eyes widened, shaking her head. “You were right. I wondered, you know, could she truly be that bad? Bleedin’ hell. She’s worse. It’s so flip switch, too!” 

“Told you.” 

“And she’s so calculated! If you prove her wrong on one thing, she veers off and attacks you over something else!” 

“Told you.” 

“Fuck! I’m so sorry you had a mum like her to deal with, especially while you’ve been recovering!” Her jaw tightened, shaking her head. “I could smack her for calling you crazy! What a nasty woman.” 

He took her hand, kissing it before they walked away from the house, the muffled sounds of his parents yelling at each other fading as they moved down the drive. “Yeah, this is why I ain’t been around her much. Her having that attitude towards me is one thing, but you? Nah. Fuck that.” He smirked a little sadly, his nose crinkling. “I still feel like a cunt for telling her to drop dead though, innit. Didn’t mean that, I was just pissed off with her being like that all the shitting time.”  

“I think you were reserved for how blazing you can be when you’re angry!” she cried, James getting into the car and leaning over to open her door for her. “You didn’t even shout at her. You just like, told her it wasn’t on and then removed yourself. It’s pants, it really is, but if that’s how she chooses to behave then honestly, this has probably been a long time coming.” 

He started the engine, but sat and looked thoughtful for a few moments, reaching to grasp her hand. “I love that about you, babe. You’re so fucking wise, and you’re right. It has. Thanks for standing up for me in there, too. Just wish it hadn’t fucking happened. Proper fucking stressed now.” 

Looking at her watch, she saw that the disastrous lunch had left them with three hours to kill until Andrea’s train arrived, her fingers tickling her way up his arm through the thick, grey sweater he wore. “I can take your mind off the stress, if you like?” 

The suggestion in her voice and the way she looked out from under her lashes at him was undeniable. Half an hour later, and he was relaxing in the armchair, smoking a joint while Ella’s mouth bobbed up and down on his cock. There were much worse ways to spend a Saturday afternoon, he thought. He could have stayed at his mother’s house, for example.  

The tie had been severed now, though, and while he did feel shit about how it had all ended, there was a very real sense of peace he experienced at cutting her out of his life. If she brought him nothing but frustration then she couldn’t remain. Frustration was the last thing he felt in that moment, though, taking one last puff on the joint before placing it down, not wanting to be too high when he had to drive. Besides, Ella was doing wonderful things for him with her mouth all on her own. 

“Mmmmm, fuck, your cock is so hard,” she moaned, flicking her tongue over the head before taking him back deep again, feeling it twitch. “Makes me really want to get on it, but I’ll have enough of that later, and I don’t want a sore little pussy to take that kind of pounding.”  

Working him faster and faster, her hand massaged the base of him while her mouth gradually added more pressure, his hips twitching and abs locking as with a deep groan, he spilled into her throat. 

Swallowing, she carefully tucked him back into his jeans, licking her lip seductively as she reached for her can of Diet Coke and took a big gulp. “Less stressed now?” 

“Mm.” 

Chuckling at his blissed-out reaction, she moved astride him. “Did I fry your brain?” 

“Mm.”  

She kissed him, all slow heat, his hands grasping tight on her bum. “Cool beans. Can’t be having a stressed-out church burner on my hands.” He laughed, and she received a hard slap to her bum, Ella squeaking as she made herself comfortable on his lap. They had about twenty minutes of the flat to themselves before Steve and Snedders arrived back, the guys laden with bags.  

“Happy birthday, Greenhall!” Steve announced at high volume. “Sorry it ain’t wrapped, but I’m a bloke. I’m proper rubbish at all that!” 

She had her face grabbed and a huge smacker planted on her lips, James beginning to laugh filthily. “Ahh man. If only you knew where her mouth was twenty minutes ago.” 

Steve worked it out in two seconds, shuddering, his face so sour that the flat was filled with riotous laughter at his expense as he strode for the alcohol bottles in the kitchen and cleansed himself with four mouthfuls of Jack Daniels. “Oh man. No. Bleugh. Open your present!” 

Ella peered into the bag, her eyes lighting up. “I love you! You’ve been talking to Hester, haven’t you?” 

“I fucking have!” he announced proudly as she pulled out a wooden carved buddha statue she’d been eyeing in the local new age shop, plus a bottle of Absolut vodka. “Get it open! Let’s do shots!”  

Ella shared a look with James. “Only him. Only ole’ Berserker over there would have designs on drinking my birthday present with me.” 

“Oi! Who polished off my fucking tequila last Sunday and then kept me awake while she bounced all over my best friend’s cock? You and your sex screaming owe me, now get over here!”  

He had a point, Ella scrambling from James’s lap with her vodka as he laughed loudly, moving to Steve who was lining up shot glasses. She had the feeling it was about to be an awesome night, regardless of what had befallen it in the hours before.  

She’d be right to, too.  

[nerdyreaderpapi]

oh hi my love! i'm so sorry for being inactive. i had a death in the family and i've had to take on a bigger responsibility, but now i'm able to slowly return to my normal schedule.

Jade constantly saying how bored she is so funny because every time I have injured myself and I have to stay home, I complain nonstop!

2. “What are you even doing out of bed, Moo?” He pointed in the direction of the kitchen door, circling his finger. “Back upstairs, go.”

-I love Adrien so much! him ordering her back upstairs is so husband like! I love seeing their sweet and soft moments and how he takes care of her all the time!

3. “Two weeks, my baby. Two weeks and I will fucking ruin you.” Pausing, his smile began to widen, chuckling. “For about a minute and half, but damn, it’ll be the best minute and a half of your life!”

I SUPPORT THIS MESSAGE!! and I will be right here ready to read and see him follow through with this!

4. It had hit her in waves after waking to be filled in on the gaps in her memory, the magnitude of being so close to death. What had affected her most was when her darling Katie had told her it had taken her an hour to bleach off the blood stain from the front drive, she’d been crying so hard, but wanting it gone before either she or Adrien had arrived back to see it there.  

oh man that made me tear up too, Katie not wanting them to see it when they return so she cleans it up is honestly so sweet! hoping she's okay after seeing the scene and it was so nice or her to do that for them!

5. Her side eye was delivered with lethal intent. “I will cock punch you.”  

-LMAOAOAOOAOA NOT HER THREATNING TO COCK PUNCH HIM!!

6. “I mean, I’ll take that,” he began, resting his forehead to hers, “but your number isn’t really high enough to know mine’s the best. Forty-two isn’t that high.”

“Just take the bloody compliment, Brody,” she spoke, kissing him.

“Yeah… yeah I think I will. Even though it might be vastly inaccurate.”

LMAOAOOAOAOAAO THEM HAVING THIS CONVO WHILE HAVING SEX!!! please that made me burst out laughing, that's the first laugh I've had in a while! I love how they were so unserious in this moment

7. “Oh god, I’ve turned into a forty seconds guy,”

-IT'S OKAY ADRIEN! WE ALL STILL LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU! lol the age is catching up to him ! (jokingly)

8. Leaning closer, his kissed the side of his neck with a happy hum. “It’s because I trust you, I feel safe to. I’ll never not feel safe, as long as I have you.”  

“I love hearing that.” Stopping, he took both of her hands in his, resting his forehead to hers. “Can you do something for me?” 

Jade knew where this was going. “Anything.” 

“Love me forever?” 

She smiled, kissing the tip of his nose. “Always.” 

-OH MY GOODNESS MY BABIES!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!!! I CAN'T WAIT FOR MORE! now this made me tear up AGAIN, they're honestly so vulnerable with each other and it's such a beautiful thing to witness

thank you so much for this beautiful update! my replies might be delayed but it's only bcs I'm getting back into my routine and setting back up with work! but I'm so excited to read more!! also, the setup of my reply might look weird but it's because I'm on my computer lol, so it might look a little messy.

I'm so excited to catch up and read more!! this was so beautifully written!

Sky Full of Stars - Chapter Twenty One.

Thank you so much to everyone for your commitment to the story, as usual! Happy Friday, guys. Enjoy! :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen Eighteen Nineteen Twenty

Tag list - In the comments

Words - 3,946

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI!

“I’m so bored.”  

As was Adrien of hearing his wife chime those three words over and over. He could hardly blame her for it, though, and so thus took it with good nature, knowing that it had to be tough for somebody who kept herself so busy to be rendered incapacitated. After being allowed to go home, they’d spent a week at the apartment in Manhattan before Jade felt well enough to fly. Now she’d been returned upstate for the last week and four days, she was rapidly tiring of being confined to a bed for the most part. 

Her healing was estimated to take twelve weeks from the point of the incident, and they were currently at week eight, with her not allowed to do anything physically demanding, given the instruction to rest as much as possible.  

“What are you even doing out of bed, Moo?” He pointed in the direction of the kitchen door, circling his finger. “Back upstairs, go.” 

“No. I want cheese and I want to sit in the sun while I eat it. I physically can’t lie in a bed for that long unless I have you on top of me, and I can’t even do that for another two weeks. Even though I feel fine, my breathing is normal, my wounds are all healed, but no! I’m being treated like heirloom glass when really, I want to be shagged into the tail end of next week!”  

She’d specifically asked her godmother that, Lucy dying laughing, calling her a horny reprobate. ‘Ten weeks, and then light exertion will be fine. No sexual gymnastics!’  

Walking over to him, she pulled his head down to her level, kissing him, his lips, his nose, and the crinkles that dented his forehead as he frowned. “Sitting, that's all. My eyes hurt from reading, and I’ve binged all ten seasons of Friends in the last two weeks. I need a change of scenery.” 

He made a soft growl. “Fine.” 

“Yes, it is, because you’re not going to boss you around, or I’ll bite you, you bugger.” His pec was chomped upon softly, Adrien shaking his head. 

“That isn’t much of a threat, baby.” Kissing his chest, she hugged him tightly before moving to the fridge, ready to raid the order she’d had delivered from the small deli in the nearest village. It held a surprisingly good selection, little slices of each taken, Jade adding crackers and grapes to the plate she carried outside to enjoy under the summer sun with a glass of wine.  

“That little area over there is entirely too empty,” she spoke, crunching through a cracker while pointing at the little patch of land beneath the trees where the chickens were meant to be.  

It was, he had to agree. “How about once you’ve finished your snacks, we take a drive down to the farm shop and bring a few home?” Perhaps he was being a little too precious with her, he had to concede. Their local farm shop and feed store was only a twenty-minute drive away, Adrien knowing they were running low on horse food, so having to organise that anyway, they might as well.  

It was necessary too, now Mia had finally arrived from Austria five days before. Jade had been annoyed beyond words that he’d told her a firm no over doing a ten hour round trip to JFK in order to bring her back upstate, but he’d had help in the form of Rachel, who had offered to come along, knowing considerably more about horse care than him. He’d needed somebody who knew how to load a steed onto a horse truck properly, how to put the travel boots on, bandage her tail, tie her up properly, all of which his sister-in-law could probably do in her sleep, she was so adept. 

Her head shot up like a meerkat, eyes rounding a little. “Really? You’re allowing me to leave the house?” 

“You make me sound like your captor, Burtie,” he scoffed, receiving a cheeky eyebrow raise. 

“Kinda missing being tied up and defiled.”  

He groaned softly, closing his eyes for a moment. “Don’t. Now I’m not so scared to remember I have a high libido, believe me, my hand ain’t cutting it.”  

Oh, the flicker she felt between her thighs. “You should let me watch that.”  

“Never quite works though, does it? Not with either of us trying to play the captive audience. We get to about a thirty seconds and dive on the other.” That was true enough. The only time they’d ever been able to successfully watch one another masturbate was when they’d done it over Skype while apart. 

“I’ve got in it my head now. Fucks sake,” she groaned, taking a large gulp of wine, crossing her legs tightly with a huff that had him shaking with soft laughter. 

“Two weeks, my baby. Two weeks and I will fucking ruin you.” Pausing, his smile began to widen, chuckling. “For about a minute and half, but damn, it’ll be the best minute and a half of your life!”  

Laughing, she leaned against him, stroking his thigh as he kissed the top of her head. Laughter was medicinal in the wake of what had happened to her, so close to losing her life right there on her own driveway. It had hit her in waves after waking to be filled in on the gaps in her memory, the magnitude of being so close to death. What had affected her most was when her darling Katie had told her it had taken her an hour to bleach off the blood stain from the front drive, she’d been crying so hard, but wanting it gone before either she or Adrien had arrived back to see it there.  

It hadn’t just impacted her, the knock-on effect of her attack leaving her loved ones terrified and her husband with the kind of blood pressure level that had taken days to come back to a normal reading, so her dad had confided. Her poor mother hadn’t slept for longer than a few hours every night immediately after.  

Adrien had thought she wouldn’t want to sue the care facility, but she’d very much proven otherwise. Their legal team had hit them with a suit for gross negligence, Jade stating that if that was how lax they were that a patient with murderous intentions could so easily escape, then truly, they needed to face the consequences of such. After all, what if anyone had gotten in her way prior to her arriving in Cleveland? Would they likely have met the same fate, but perhaps not quite been so lucky? What the hell were the people looking after her thinking, too, allowing a woman who had likely shown such dangerous intentions to remain in such a low security facility?  

As Adrien pulled his truck from the drive out onto the road, she thought about it again, a little shiver running through her. Of course, he noticed, seeing her close into herself a little. “You okay, baby love?” 

“Yeah, ish,” she confessed. “It’s a hard thing to reconcile, my home being the place I always feel so safe, but now the location of where I was the farthest from that. Don’t panic, I’m not about to say I want to move or anything. That mental cunt won’t drive me from my home. It’s just a bit weird right now.” 

Reaching for her, he squeezed her thigh, feeling her hand cover his, her little finger stroking over his knuckles. “Give it time, I think that’s all you need. Also, look at it differently, perhaps? I’m not trying to minimise what happened to you, but if you look at it as the place you survived rather than the alternative, that might be a better perspective going forward.”  

She loved that about him, how she could see a situation strictly from one viewpoint, but he would usually find a way to see it completely opposite, with credible validity. “I never thought of it like that before, baby. You’re right, though. Thank you. Love you.” 

“Love you, too, Moo.”  

As soon as they arrived at the farm shop, Lyn, the woman who had run it for almost twenty years with her husband Ray came out from behind the counter, the dear old lady opening her arms wide with a huge smile. “Hello, sweetheart. Oh, it’s great to see you looking so well! How you feeling, hmm?” 

“Pretty good, actually. Mr. B over there isn’t letting me do much at all, so I’ve had plenty of rest. I can breathe properly again without having to rely on oxygen, which is a bonus. You’re very kind to ask,” she replied, gently clasping her forearms as they parted.  

Shaking her head, she touched a gentle hand to her cheek. “How anybody would want to hurt such a dear soul as you, my love. We’ve had it all up here, you know! Journalists, photographers coming up to grab something to eat. Ray and I pass by you guy’s place every morning on our way in, and we saw them all waiting in their cars for pictures! Damned parasites. I told them I had nothing to say when they asked for comment, other than how sad I was that something so awful happened to such a nice girl.” 

Oh yes, they’d been sitting in wait to get photographs of her upon her arrival at home. “I appreciate that, Lyn. Anyway, I’m here to fill my chicken coop and spend an obscene amount in the shop. As a first-time chicken owner, I’d appreciate your advice on the former.” 

She nodded, walking her round to the area the birds were housed in. “Plymouth Rock hens are good first chicken. Friendly, unfussy and they lay well. Orpingtons and Rhode Island Reds are great choices, too, all of which we have. How big is your space, hon?” 

After a few more details were exchanged, three of each chicken breed were chosen, Lyn providing travel cages to be run back up the day after, leaving Adrien and Ray to load the chickens onto the truck and Jade to go and fill a couple of baskets of produce within the shop. Once that had been bought, the required horse and chicken feed, too, they headed home, ready to introduce the birds to their brand-new habitat.  

“That red over there? I’m naming her Marge,” Jade spoke, pointing at one of the three Rhode Island’s. “Listen to her! That’s the same noise Marge Simpson makes when she’s annoyed.”  

He coughed softly. “You do that, too.” 

“Don't you dare let this be another nickname that enters your little repertoire,” she warned, watching him shake with laughter as he wrapped his arm around her. 

“Of course not, Marge.”  

Her side eye was delivered with lethal intent. “I will cock punch you.”  

His laughter boomed so loudly, the chickens spooked, all running for the safety of the hen house with a little flurry and some disgruntled noises. “Now look what you did, making me scare the chickens because of your empty threats.” 

“It wasn’t empty,” she warned, balling her fist. 

“Sounds like somebody doesn’t want to get laid sooner rather than later.”  

“Oh, and you’re really going to give it to me sooner, hmm? Mr only let me out of the damned house for the first time today, when I’m still two weeks away from being able to heavy breathe?”  

He raised his eyebrows rapidly, looking smug. “Might have given you a gentle banging, but now, with this little display of funky assed attitude? Nah. You can wait.”  

Her husband. God, he was insufferably contrary when he put his mind to it. “Fine. Just know I’ll be upstairs with my favourite vibrator. Let that information marinade.” Slapping him on the bum, she walked back to the house. She wasn’t even halfway through the door before she found him draped around her, lifting her into his arms and carrying her upstairs. “So, best minute and a half of my life, huh?” 

“Stop it,” he laughed, reaching the top of the stairs and turning right, walking down to their bedroom. “Don’t jinx me.” 

“So, what’s different? You’ve been treating me like I’m subject to breakages up until a few hours ago, and now all that’s changed?” she teased, knowing she was being a menace, but not able to fight giving a little back. 

Laying her on the bed, he grumbled at her mildly infuriating riposte, pulling his t shirt off before joining her, hands grasping the straps of her dress and pulling them down. “The fact that I’m only human. And... well... you’ve seen yourself. How the hell am I supposed to keep my hands off someone so gorgeous for twelve weeks? Ten is fine, but just tell me if it isn’t, alright?” 

Her lung could have burned with all the heat of a thousand suns, and she would have kept that to herself, feeling her need for her husband smoulder with the same ferocious heat. He discarded her dress and underwear rapidly, mouth anchoring to hers with a soft grunt, hands softly kneading her bare breasts. How he loved it when she didn’t bother with underwear, his touch skimming down her sides.  

The feel of two, then three little ridged scars beneath his touch prickled him emotionally, his lips following the glide of his hands, pressing kisses, sucking her nipples in turn, his mouth veering right to kiss upon the healed wounds that had almost taken her from him. She knew what he was doing, and how she loved him for it, showing her it didn’t matter to him that her body now came with flaws; he still desired her just the same as he always had.  

Where she craved to feel those kisses, to her delight he did not hesitate in arrival, pushing her thighs apart and burying his mouth between them, ten weeks of longing for her unravelling as his tongue slithered through her slit. He brought those licks against her clit, hungrily tasting her, his mouth eager in its repeated rolling over her bud as she sighed in gratification of him returned so intimately to her.  

Sliding over the little swell of her clit once more, he sent fire roaring through her, a blade of pleasure slicing to her very bones as she shook, the tip of his tongue skimming dewy pink nerve endings, his thumb pulling back the soft skin covering her bundle, making way for his lips to suck gently. Sparks fizzed right down to her marrow, the flush of ecstasy evoked by his mouth ever escalating, her body host to spasmodic judders as he caressed her dewy slit with all the fervour of a man half parched.  

“Fuck, oh god, baby. You’re gonna make me come so hard!” she wailed, hands fisting the grey linen below as she trembled, crested and burned hard against the fire of his mouth. While those divine licks gentled against her, he reached to unfasten his jeans, pushing and kicking himself out of them, kissing his way back to her mouth, hard cock parting her walls with a soft grunt.  

He stilled, thumbs moving to stroke her cheeks, feeling a little overcome. It was a moment that might not have ever happened for them again, but there she was beneath him in their bed, pretty lips parted as she panted softly, looking up at him adoringly. Life; it was truly so precious. As was she.  

As for Jade, the desire and tenderness of the moment pulled her in, guiding his mouth to hers as their bodies began to rock together, feeling a little more restored to her usual self at finally having sexual intimacy resumed. Her nails gently dragged his back, delighting in the feel of his body pressing tight against hers, a sudden hard shunt of his hips against her sending him deep into the flutter of her cunt. 

“Missed me right here, huh?” he chuckled, watching the sated desire glitter her eyes.  

“Mmm.” she purred, stroking his face, their kisses connecting hot, “I always do when I have to go without the best cock in the world.” Every inch of him slipped into her with ease, every ridge scraping tingles over her soaking walls, hands gently kneading her breasts as his kisses moved to her neck.  

“I mean, I’ll take that,” he began, resting his forehead to hers, “but your number isn’t really high enough to know mine’s the best. Forty-two isn’t that high.” 

“Just take the bloody compliment, Brody,” she spoke, kissing him. 

“Yeah... yeah I think I will. Even though it might be vastly inaccurate.” 

“Adrien?” she questioned, an entertained smile playing her lips. “Are you being all chatty because you’re trying not to come?” 

A smidgen of embarrassment flickered across his face. Oh, he was so cute. “Yeah, maybe.” A few seconds passed. “Okay, I am. I grossly overestimated myself at a minute and a half.” Her laugh filled the bedroom, her husband rooting himself deeper in her to prevent slipping out. “Stop, that feels too good!” 

“Baby?” 

“Yep?” 

“Just come.” Holding his face in her hands, she kissed him, nuzzling away his shame. “I came already against your tongue, didn’t I? You’re fine. Just let go.” It was as he shared kisses of fiery honey with his beloved that his body shuddered hard, staccato thrusts sending him headlong into the enjoyment of lightning forking up his spine.  

“Oh god, I’ve turned into a forty seconds guy,” he panted, laughing softly as he kissed her. “Sorry.” Stroking her face, he kissed her some more, Jade laughing as she shook her head, fingers weaving into his hair.  

“Well, don’t be. I’m flattered it bothers you, though. Most guys are so selfish like that, but you never are. It’s just one of the many reasons I love you.”  

“And because I make you laugh by being an embarrassingly rapid quick draw?”  

Of course, that comment had her in soft fits. “Stop being daft, my love. Besides, there’s always later.” The grin she was met with told her loud and clear he definitely planned to redeem himself a little. Until then, they went back downstairs, taking a gentle walk around their land with the dogs while waiting for the barbecue to heat up, Jade leaving two large steaks marinading in the fridge for dinner. 

“You look thoughtful,” he spoke, turning his focus away from Brando heaving a large stick from the long grass.  

Turning to him, she smiled, but he still picked up on a trace of sadness there. “I was just thinking about the projects I’ve missed out on, because of what happened. It feels selfish, too. Really selfish. I was so lucky to survive and here I am lamenting the loss of work!”  

Tightening his arm around her, he dropped a kiss upon her head. “It isn’t selfish, it’s just you. You hate to feel like you’ve missed out on an opportunity to further yourself, naturally ambitious as you are. Okay, so you missed a couple of exciting projects, but plenty more will come your way. I don’t have to tell you that.”  

“It’s nice to hear all the same, though.” she smiled, yet still the little flicker of something not quite right remained.  

“What else is bugging you?” 

Of course, he wouldn’t let it slide. She didn’t want him to either. “Today when we went out, I felt fine, safe. You were there, but I can’t hide at my husband’s side forever, yet the thought of going out alone scares me. I know it’s ridiculous, too! She can’t get to me again. I mean blimey, watching back the CCTV from the front gate at what happened, I gave almost as good as I got, so I know I can defend myself, but still. It makes me feel nervous.” 

It was something they’d lightly argued about, a day after arriving home, Jade wanting to see the footage of her attack in an effort to remember what had happened, and Adrien not seeing it as a conducive move at all. He’d conceded in the end, though, Jade watching the feed from the office computer, wincing, but finding it helpful. It helped in so much that she witnessed how she’d fought her attacker hard, even if she didn’t remember much. 

“I think that’s natural,” he began, turning to see Atlas running from the trees whilst dragging along a large branch. Always branches with that dog. “Put it down! Atlas, no. That’s too big.” The dog gave it a shake with a playful grown before releasing it, the four canines hurtling off again together. “Anyway, as I was saying before meathead distracted me. You feeling like that probably isn’t uncommon in people who’ve been attacked, so don’t be hard on yourself, or expect to feel perfectly back to normal in the wake of this. Give yourself time, don’t start reverting to old habits.” 

He had worried that she might, but her reassurance was swift. “No, no I won’t. I know if I rush myself to feel back to my old self, I won’t get there. I am still being a bit tough on myself, just so you know, but that’s mostly out of frustration. I can’t really hate her for what she did, because she isn’t in her right mind. I’m struggling with it, reconciling it, that I really shouldn’t be scared because she was just one lone nutter with a grudge borne of what her mental illness had made her believe. At the same time, though, it was a fucking traumatic experience. I need to give myself time, no matter how much it bugs me.” 

“Three years ago, and you would have shut it down, likely thrown yourself into a heap of work and then had to deal with the fallout from all of that,” he noted, hand idly stroking her arm.  

“Three years ago, and I was still two and a half months away from meeting you,” she noted, leaning into him a little, whistling for the dogs. Up popped Groucho’s head, gleaming dark copper in the summer sunshine. “Come on, knob head!” she chuckled, watching him dive over the long grass as they turned at the top of their land, heading back towards the house.  

“How the hell has it been three years? Shit,” he exclaimed softly, his hand reaching for Bear when the big dog licked his fingers, he and the others trotting along much slower after their frenzied exertion. “And I want you to know how proud I am of you, the way you deal with things so much more healthily than you did. Okay, so some stuff lingers, but you at least tell me about it. That’s all I ever wanted.”  

Leaning closer, his kissed the side of his neck with a happy hum. “It’s because I trust you, I feel safe to. I’ll never not feel safe, as long as I have you.”  

“I love hearing that.” Stopping, he took both of her hands in his, resting his forehead to hers. “Can you do something for me?” 

Jade knew where this was going. “Anything.” 

“Love me forever?” 

She smiled, kissing the tip of his nose. “Always.” 

If one thing remained consistent over the years that followed, it was that she truly would love the man who made her feel safe forever. Another consistency was that true to form, once she’d recovered from her ordeal, her attacker locked away in a high security psychiatric facility for the foreseeable, too, was that she returned to work with her usual gusto.  

And boy, did she eventually reap the rewards of that.  

[nerdyreaderpapi]

Simon Riley slowly eating you out in your dark room only lit by the moonlight from your window while cigarettes after sex plays quietly in the background specifically sweet

(yes I took inspo from a vid on twt lmk if y'all want the link)

[nerdyreaderpapi]

OMG YES THATS RIGHT!! Okay I remember now 😭😭😭 omg I feel so dumb now idk how I could forget that!

Thank you so much for answering my love! 💗💗

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Fourteen.

Huge love to my little audience for your continued reads, reviews and reblogs. You're so lovely <3

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,794

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

After a thirty-five-minute train journey from Nuneaton to Leamington Spa, followed by a half-hour bus ride, Ella found herself walking through the picturesque village of Moreton Morrell in the heart of the Warwickshire countryside.  

It was the first time in weeks that she’d spent any time away from James, apart from a few job interviews she’d attended, plus their respective therapy sessions, all but moving in with him completely. He hadn’t officially asked her, but welcomed it greatly, more of her belongings arriving at the flat over the eight weeks they’d been reunited, both blissful in the fledgling stages of their relationship, now able to flourish in the real world.   

That particular morning, she was on her way to visit another person she had met while at the same place she’d found her love, turning off Duffus Hill onto a small cul-de-sac, arriving at the second cottage along and rapping the heavy iron door knocker a couple of times.  

“You’re here!” 

Stepping in, she was pulled into a huge hug by Andrea, the young women thrilled to see one another again. “Aww, look at you! You look amazing, Ella!” 

“Thanks! As do you. Wow, your hair!”  

Andrea had added colour to her natural mane of fiery auburn, making the hue even more intense. “I was so glad to sit in a salon chair again and get it fixed!” Ella could identify. Walking into the abode, she was struck by how sumptuously cosy it was, the fire lit to keep the October chill at bay, a large, grandfather clock with its heavy pendulum swinging back and forth in the corner, and an album by Portishead playing softly.  

“Tea?” 

“Please, that’d be mint. I could murder a cup!” Ella confirmed, hanging up her coat on the rack and sliding her boots off. “It’s getting so cold out there. I think we’re in for a shitting horrible winter, innit.” 

Her friend raised an eyebrow. “Now, who’s dulcet tones do what you’ve just said remind me of?” she pondered, Ella shielding her face with her hand momentarily, laughing. “How is he?” 

“He’s really, really good,” she confirmed, Andrea moving into the beautiful little kitchen and clicking the kettle on. “He’s at therapy today over in Birmingham, still sees the same guy who was the head clinician at the unit he transferred to as a private patient.” 

Andrea placed some teabags into the pot before pulling two large mugs from the cupboard. “That surprises me, I have to say. I always had James down as the type to walk away from it all and give the ole’ line of ‘suck my fucking dick’ to any further therapy once he was released. I’m glad he’s benefitting from it.” 

How well she knew him. “I did too for a while, but being at the place in Edgbaston really changed his mind about it all. His therapist sounds lovely, really listens to him and guides him over what he needs to do. He didn’t respond well to Dr. Beaumont’s methods of like, pointing you in the general direction and letting you figure it out for yourself.” 

Her eyes widened a fraction. “Hmm. She was very allusive like that, wasn’t she?” Noticing Ella pull her cigarettes out, she pointed at the back door, taking one from her with thanks. “She definitely wasn’t for everyone.” 

For Andrea, though, she’d been wonderful in connecting the dots between a traumatic event and her subsequent sex addiction issues, the girls discussing it after smoking their cigarettes, moving to the big, comfortable leather Chesterfield in the lounge.  

“I think the further I understand that it was less about sex and desire itself and more thriving on the attention from men and the excitement of sleeping around, the more it’s helped me reconcile the trauma that sparked it,” she explained, sipping her tea as she took a biscuit from the tin between them. It was lovely to witness Ella taking one without prompting, she noted. “I didn’t deal with it all, when it happened. Shoved it away. It was too painful.” 

“Sweetie,” Ella cooed, reached to stroke her cheek affectionately. “Of course, it was. It was no age, losing your parents at twenty-one. That’s like, one of the worst things I can imagine.” 

Indeed, the death of her mum and dad three years before had turned Andrea’s entire life upside down. Being an only child, it had been made even more difficult. Of course, she’d had family rallying around to help her, her uncles and aunties making sure she was okay regularly. Being alone in the cottage, though, she had soon come to realise that she truly wasn’t, sparking her promiscuous and often dangerous behaviour, leading to a breakdown and subsequent sectioning.  

It was too much for any twenty-four-year-old woman to deal with, losing her parents to a fatal car crash, being catapulted into a life of sole financial comfort, since they were both very well off, but having nobody around all the time to either enjoy it with – or more pertinently – keep a watchful eye on her.  

Life after treatment, she was now very glad to say, was much, much improved. 

“So, how’s that sexy mate of James’s, then? Steve, isn’t it?” she asked, smiling with a little embarrassment. “I can’t believe I straddled the man and stuck my tongue down his throat. The shame!” 

Ella snorted softly with a smirk. “Steve wouldn’t have cared at all, trust me. Quite the opposite!” 

“Oh, I know. I could tell that by how he kissed me back,” she revealed, her cringe fading a little. “He was a very good kisser, so that makes the embarrassment that I couldn’t dial my compulsions back a little less mortifying!” 

“As for how he is, he’s fine. Keeps asking for your number,” Ella revealed, watching Andrea rub a hand down her face. “Sorry, shouldn’t I have mentioned that?” 

“No, you’re fine, sweet. It’s tricky because I fancy him, but yeah, that time I briefly met him he was nothing more than a compulsion trigger, so I don’t know. He’s a young, sexy as fuck guy. He likely won’t want to get wrapped up in my mess that I can’t really casually date somebody and enjoy carefree sex, lest triggering my issues. I sort of get the impression that’s what he’s about.” 

Oh, how right she was. “Yeah, he’s a man whore, Ands. Big time. I mean like, he’s fucking lovely, such a laugh and totally cool, but he shags around a lot.” Hester, a girl called Jennie, another she didn’t know the name of, someone called Leonie, the man had his rotation in place.  

“Bollocks,” she huffed, Ella spraying a mouthful of biscuit crumbs. “I guess I’ll settle for just looking at him and how bloody pretty he is when I finally come to see you up your way.” 

All talk of the male species was left there, the friends instead catching up with one another’s lives on the outside. Andrea revealed she’d gotten herself a part-time job at the local pub, The Black Horse, although truly she didn’t need to work with a fully paid off mortgage and all she had in savings gathering a very liveable amount in interest. 

 Still, what she wouldn’t give for her parents returned to her instead. She still cursed that the drunk driver who’d collided head on with their car had survived, albeit in a vegetative state. Perhaps that was the more fitting punishment, though. While they talked, Ella also shared a few of her plans, too, like returning to college.  

“I like, kind of think it makes me a fraud, though, wanting to strive for a career in helping others when I know I’m not one hundred percent recovered yet,” she began, sipping on a fresh cup of tea. She’d been tentatively considering it, perhaps studying for a psychology degree, wanting to specialise and help patients with eating disorders.  

Sighing, she continued. “We went out for a curry not long after James and I reconnected, and it sent me into a spiral. It was pants, mate, sitting there crying outside because I couldn’t cope with eating in an unfamiliar place. Or choosing a food I wouldn’t normally have had.” 

Andrea was thoughtful for a few moments before replying. “Did you ever think that the studies could actually help you more in your recovery? It might give you a greater insight, learning from the other side of the coin, as it were.” 

She hadn’t, it had to be said. After arriving home that evening, she discussed it more with James while she cooked chicken, him supervising the rice as she was – by her own admission – bleedin' useless with it. 

“Andrea is right,” he spoke, jumping up to sit on the counter. “You probably would get a new perspective over it. As for thinking that makes you a fraud and all of that, nah babe. Look at it this way, before your degree, you need to take your A levels first, so that’s two years. All being well, you’ll have finished that degree by twenty-eight, so that’s just over five years into your recovery, innit. You’ll be way more secure in yourself by then, won’t you?” 

“Mm,” she hummed, sighing. “I hate that my illness took such a chunk of my life, time when I should have been making these decisions and studying. I would have been a year away from completion of a degree, if I hadn’t. I messed up big time.” 

“Oi, less of that. That’s my girlfriend you’re badmouthing, dickhead,” he frowned, stretching his legs out to ensnare her, pulling her back into a full body hug. “If you hadn’t gotten ill, then you wouldn’t have decided that this was what you wanted to do, would you? Or met me. Obviously, I’m the more important of the two there.”  

His joke had her laughing, squeezing him tight and kissing his chest. “Of course, baby.” Reaching for her cider, she took a swig, lifting her head to give him a little nibble beneath his jaw before moving back to the cooker. “How was therapy, then?” 

“Yeah, pretty good, you know. We discussed my ongoing anger issues today. Michael made a good suggestion over what I could do to stop it, my desire to batter people who piss me off at the drop of a hat.”  

He’d been doing very well there, up until a week ago while at a club with Ella and a few others. Now much more confident in her body, she had been up on a podium dancing, wearing only a small outfit of hotpants and a cropped top, attracting a lot of male attention. Looking was fine, but when some random bloke had taken it upon himself to climb the side of the podium and make a grab for her, well. He’d met a very irate James, dragging him down by his jeans, his fist meeting his face at speed.  

“What did he suggest?” she asked, cracking fresh pepper over the chicken and turning each butterflied breast, moving to the chopping board to prep the vegetables to go into the wok.  

“Kickboxing. He said it would give me both an outlet for rage, and discipline over when to exert that rage and all that. Think I’m gonna give it a go, innit.” 

She widened her eyes. “War does not need to be any more deadly than he already is!” Her laughter filled the room, even more so at her boyfriend’s entertained smirk. “I think it’s a good idea, really. He seems to have a lot of those, Michael.” 

“Yeah, he’s a top grade bloke. Really fucking sound. Always has an answer for all my stuff, too. So what else is new with Andrea, then?” 

“Oh, the redheaded goddess!” Steve called from the armchair, beginning to grin. “Is she ready for me to give her one hell of a good seeing to yet?” 

“Calm your dick down,” Ella warned, pointing at him with a spatula, “you’ll do her recovery no bleedin’ good.”  

“We’re gonna have to put him in restraints when she comes up for your birthday,  innit?” James spoke, pulling a fresh beer from the fridge.  

Steve turned, his grin wide. “Nah, don’t you threaten me with a good time, Jim!”  

Once dinner had been eaten, a film watched and Steve declaring he was ‘off to play with Leonie for the night’ before leaving the flat, it wasn’t long before they decided to have a good time of their own.  

“Mmm, shit. I don’t even know how the hell you can move your tongue so quickly, but I... ahhh! I’m not complaining!” she moaned, feeling him smile against her as she straddled his head, James happily lying there with her riding his mouth.  

It burned incandescent through her, like a hail of glimmers creeping slow, his hands clutching the rounds of her bum, moving every so often to lay a hard smack. She’d never had a man spank her before, but god, how she enjoyed it when James did. He wasn’t gentle with it. At all.  

While his hands showed no mercy, his tongue slowed, dragging flat and slow through her folds, circling over her clit and repeating the action again. Her thighs shook from the potency of each lick, shuddered breaths leaving her mouth as she panted hard, her gaze falling to see him open his eyes and wink at her.  

Wrapping her clit in a firm suck, the sensation rooted itself in her, sharp-toothed and edging on a little too much, her hips swaying against his mouth. The pleasure dug deep into her marrow as she cried out, the release snapping through her, Ella immediately moving to gratify him by sheathing his cock within her still fluttering walls.  

He weighed heavy in the depths of her, the feeling of her soaking him only gratified further by the prickle of teeth crushing his nipple, her nails grazing like sensual daggers down his sides. She pulled heaven from the very depths of his hell every time he was inside her, not afraid to be as rough with him as he liked her to be, her hand grasping his neck, nails digging in as she kissed him with stormy lust.  

She sucked his tongue, his mouth then gliding to rain soft bites over her neck, grasping her bum and fucking up into her powerfully, the tempo remaining slow burning like napalm. Sitting back up again, his cock pressed firmly as she rotated her hips, hitting her front wall, lightning rolling over her spine, clawing at the black and grey brandings of his upper arms as he reached to squeeze her breasts.  

God, how she loved him, thrived on the thrill of having sex with him, James the sole reignition to her desires as soon as she’d started to feel better. The way he looked at her too, it made her feel incredible about herself, her body confidence restored. She couldn’t thank him enough for having such a part in returning that to her. There were wobbles on occasion, but they were becoming fewer and further between. 

Watching as she fucked him, she’d never seen a sight as sexy, her tall, muscular, tattooed man with his storm grey eyes. He was so darkly alluring, so stunningly sexy, James’s thoughts over her extremely similar. He loved that she finally saw what he did in her, and enjoyed her body as much as he did for the most part. 

The way she moved on top of him had him lost to the sublimity of it, no girl before her doing quite such a thorough job where he’d be content to remain on his back for the duration. It was hypnotic, a rhythmic spell of sexual energy unlike anything he’d ever experienced, her body rolling and undulating like she was made of liquid. Quite simply, he’d never been ridden like that in his whole life. She absolutely blew his mind, this beautiful young woman who he fallen so deeply in love with.  

The pace became more urgent and frenzied, voracity replacing the slower, sumptuous enjoyment that had prevailed thus far, Ella grinding down on him eagerly as he moved beneath her with more purpose, both of them driving deeper moans from one another.   

Each keen undulation caused him to feel sparks flickering his spine, while she had her own bliss pulsing softly, increasing more the faster she moved, fervidly chasing her release as she began to rub her clit, her other hand flexing at his chest, nails digging in.  

A string of panted expletives left her mouth as she felt herself reach boiling point, bubbling over and taking him with her to a gloriously sweet finish, intensity throbbing hard and leaving them both a breathless, shuddering wreck.   

With Ella now taking the contraceptive pill, there was no longer a need to move immediately to dispose of a condom, James pulling her down against his chest, stroking her back as he kissed her deeply. Floaty light little aftershocks skipped over her nerves as her release ebbed away slowly, feeling his cock twitching within the hug of her walls.  

Sleepiness began to settle over her, Ella finally moving to her side of the bed and pulling the duvet and thick, faux fur blanket over them, blocking out the November chill from their bare flesh as he curled around her.  

“Night, babe.” Dropping a kiss upon her shoulder, his arm tightened around her as his head sank into the pillows beneath it. “Love you.” 

“Love you too, my sexy church burner.”  

Yes, it still made him laugh.  

The following morning, Ella rose first, pulling on one of James’s long-sleeved t shirts (this one depicting the logo for the band Venom, who she was becoming a little partial to) her big, slouchy socks as well as her pyjama bottoms, shivering a little as she waited for the heating to come on while making herself a tea.  

Looking over into the lounge area, she noticed a familiar sight, a blanket swathed Snedders lying asleep on the sofa. He had his own key, so it wasn’t a surprise to sometimes find him there of a morning unexpectedly. She guessed there’d be a story to accompany his presence, probably involving his on/off girlfriend, the infamous Kerry. Ella didn’t like her at all, finding her to be very difficult to get along with.  

Making her tea, she moved to the armchair, placing her mug down on the much neater coffee table. In lieu of being able to offer anything towards the rent (which James had dismissively snorted at the suggestion of anyway) she’d taken it upon herself to keep the dwelling tidier and cleaner, padding to the corner where the answering machine light flashed.  

Turning the volume down low so as not to wake Snedders, she pressed play, being informed of three new messages.  

“Hi sis! I need to meet you at half four this afternoon so don’t get there too early. My shifts, the way they’re moving them around, fucks sake! I know it’s only half an hour, but yeah. See you later!”  

Jane, a welcome message.  

“James, it’s only me. Dad and I would love to see you. Are you free to come to lunch at ours next Saturday? Let me know, love.” 

Carole, perhaps not so welcome, depending on her mood. She’d sounded jovial enough, though.  

“Hello, message for Ella Greenhall. This is Sharon calling from Bloomin’ Lovely about your interview. I’m pleased to say we’ve chosen you for the position, if you could call me back at the shop as soon as possible, that would be lovely. Tentatively, I’d like you to start next Monday. Looking forward to hearing from you soon!” 

“Oh my god!” she squeaked, jumping up and down as quietly as she could, clasping her hands over her mouth. “I bleedin’ got it!!”  

Out of all the jobs she’d recently been applying for, the position at the florist just off the high street there in Nuneaton was the one she’d coveted most, Sharon, the owner making her feel so welcome when she’d arrived, the atmosphere so warm and lovely. It was only a part-time position, but with her wanting to start at college again it was perfect for her, Ella able to work in the college hours around her new job.  

When James got up around an hour later, her news brought him booming delight, much less concerned with waking up the sleeping heap of ginger dreadlocks on the sofa than she was. 

“Babe, that’s top grade! I’m so fucking proud of you!” he exclaimed, swinging her around in his arms, a grunt coming from the sofa. 

“Aw, ya got a job, Ells?” Snedders grumbled, emerging from within the swathe of the large blanket. “Nice one, little mate.”  

“Cheers, Sneds,” she chimed, turning then to her boyfriend after he put her down once more. “Also, your mum left a message. Asked if you were free for lunch next Saturday.” 

“Hmm,” he hummed, his jaw setting slightly. “Since that’s your birthday, I’m saying no. Even if it wasn’t, I’d still be saying no.” 

“Well, we’re not doing anything until the evening, are we?” 

He smirked, side eyeing her with raised eyebrows. “I had planned to bounce you on my dick for most of the afternoon.” Pausing, he began to laugh at the lascivious look she returned. “Hold on, did she say anything about you going, too?” 

“Not specifically,” she shrugged, reaching for her cigarettes.  

That was about right for Carole. She knew all about Ella, too, James already having introduced her to his dad, Alan thinking she was ‘absolutely bloody lovely, kidda’ as the man himself had worded it. “Then I definitely ain’t going.”  

“Maybe she meant me too, but just didn’t say it?” she suggested, watching his lips tightening. Perhaps it was best to leave it there, she thought, knowing well now the clear signs of him becoming agitated. “Then again like, maybe she didn’t. You’re not obliged to call her back if you don’t want to, baby.” 

He relaxed then, slipping an arm around her. “Good, because I’m not.”  

As it turned out, though, the lack of return phone call led to Carole reaching out to her son again, James answering the phone to her a few hours later.  

“Does that invite extend to Ella?” he asked, frowning.  

“Of course, it does!” she exclaimed, busying herself with cleaning the kitchen while she jammed the cordless phone between her ear and shoulder. “I’d like to meet this girl your father has told me all about.”  

Even though she was being polite and casual, agreeing to visiting still went against his better judgement. Come the following Saturday, he’d see in hindsight how correct his intuition had been, too. 

[nerdyreaderpapi]

YAY I FINALLY GOT THE NOTIFICATION!! I was thinking maybe it was my phone or probably the app! But I’m hereeeeee

1) Andrea!!!! My baby is back! I’m so glad to see her doing well, I love that her and Ella met and and spoke! I really hope that Andrea meets someone that is sweet to her!

2) ugh Ella and James are everything! I love the care he has for her and how he’s always looking out for her and doesn’t allow her to badmouth herself! He’s the best! And I love that they can openly talk about James’ therapy! I’m so happy that he found a therapist that actually listens and cares about him, and I’m glad it’s working for him! My baby’s deserve to be happy 🥰

3) OH! Things most certainly got very… hot! I can’t explain it but I love reading their intimate scenes, especially knowing how far they’ve come together it makes their scenes more passionate. At least in my eyes! Idk if that sounds weird lol but because I feel like I really know them, it seems so passionate and fiery. Definitely SPICY🤭😂😂

4) Ella calling James a church burner is actually really funny😂😂😂 and to know that she started calling him it when they were in treatment and continued calling him it now is so funny and wholesome, it’s my favourite nickname that she has for him!

5) YAY ELLA GOT THE JOB!!! I’m so proud of her, I know she was looking and trying and I’m so glad she has an opportunity!! I feel like this will be really good for her and allow her to get out more and be more social! I’m so excited for her!!

6) I love how James friends are so supportive! I really really love that, I’ve noticed that throughout the chapters and it makes my heart warm! They’re like a cute little family!

7) oh-oh James mother… idk why I get a bad vibe from her, I guess we shall see in the upcoming chapters! But I love how James refused to go if Ella wasn’t invited! And he called and asked, that was so sweet!!! James is my number one for sure!! 💗💗

I loved this chapter so much!! I’m so excited for more, also I have a question, I can’t remember if it was mentioned or is I accidentally forgot about it but James is part of a band right and do they actively perform? It may sound like a stupid question but it popped into my head last second and I couldn’t remember the answer!

Anyways, I loved this SO much !! I’m so excited for the next update! You’re absolutely amazing and your writing is TOP TIER!! 💗💗💗

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Fourteen.

Huge love to my little audience for your continued reads, reviews and reblogs. You're so lovely <3

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,794

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

After a thirty-five-minute train journey from Nuneaton to Leamington Spa, followed by a half-hour bus ride, Ella found herself walking through the picturesque village of Moreton Morrell in the heart of the Warwickshire countryside.  

It was the first time in weeks that she’d spent any time away from James, apart from a few job interviews she’d attended, plus their respective therapy sessions, all but moving in with him completely. He hadn’t officially asked her, but welcomed it greatly, more of her belongings arriving at the flat over the eight weeks they’d been reunited, both blissful in the fledgling stages of their relationship, now able to flourish in the real world.   

That particular morning, she was on her way to visit another person she had met while at the same place she’d found her love, turning off Duffus Hill onto a small cul-de-sac, arriving at the second cottage along and rapping the heavy iron door knocker a couple of times.  

“You’re here!” 

Stepping in, she was pulled into a huge hug by Andrea, the young women thrilled to see one another again. “Aww, look at you! You look amazing, Ella!” 

“Thanks! As do you. Wow, your hair!”  

Andrea had added colour to her natural mane of fiery auburn, making the hue even more intense. “I was so glad to sit in a salon chair again and get it fixed!” Ella could identify. Walking into the abode, she was struck by how sumptuously cosy it was, the fire lit to keep the October chill at bay, a large, grandfather clock with its heavy pendulum swinging back and forth in the corner, and an album by Portishead playing softly.  

“Tea?” 

“Please, that’d be mint. I could murder a cup!” Ella confirmed, hanging up her coat on the rack and sliding her boots off. “It’s getting so cold out there. I think we’re in for a shitting horrible winter, innit.” 

Her friend raised an eyebrow. “Now, who’s dulcet tones do what you’ve just said remind me of?” she pondered, Ella shielding her face with her hand momentarily, laughing. “How is he?” 

“He’s really, really good,” she confirmed, Andrea moving into the beautiful little kitchen and clicking the kettle on. “He’s at therapy today over in Birmingham, still sees the same guy who was the head clinician at the unit he transferred to as a private patient.” 

Andrea placed some teabags into the pot before pulling two large mugs from the cupboard. “That surprises me, I have to say. I always had James down as the type to walk away from it all and give the ole’ line of ‘suck my fucking dick’ to any further therapy once he was released. I’m glad he’s benefitting from it.” 

How well she knew him. “I did too for a while, but being at the place in Edgbaston really changed his mind about it all. His therapist sounds lovely, really listens to him and guides him over what he needs to do. He didn’t respond well to Dr. Beaumont’s methods of like, pointing you in the general direction and letting you figure it out for yourself.” 

Her eyes widened a fraction. “Hmm. She was very allusive like that, wasn’t she?” Noticing Ella pull her cigarettes out, she pointed at the back door, taking one from her with thanks. “She definitely wasn’t for everyone.” 

For Andrea, though, she’d been wonderful in connecting the dots between a traumatic event and her subsequent sex addiction issues, the girls discussing it after smoking their cigarettes, moving to the big, comfortable leather Chesterfield in the lounge.  

“I think the further I understand that it was less about sex and desire itself and more thriving on the attention from men and the excitement of sleeping around, the more it’s helped me reconcile the trauma that sparked it,” she explained, sipping her tea as she took a biscuit from the tin between them. It was lovely to witness Ella taking one without prompting, she noted. “I didn’t deal with it all, when it happened. Shoved it away. It was too painful.” 

“Sweetie,” Ella cooed, reached to stroke her cheek affectionately. “Of course, it was. It was no age, losing your parents at twenty-one. That’s like, one of the worst things I can imagine.” 

Indeed, the death of her mum and dad three years before had turned Andrea’s entire life upside down. Being an only child, it had been made even more difficult. Of course, she’d had family rallying around to help her, her uncles and aunties making sure she was okay regularly. Being alone in the cottage, though, she had soon come to realise that she truly wasn’t, sparking her promiscuous and often dangerous behaviour, leading to a breakdown and subsequent sectioning.  

It was too much for any twenty-four-year-old woman to deal with, losing her parents to a fatal car crash, being catapulted into a life of sole financial comfort, since they were both very well off, but having nobody around all the time to either enjoy it with – or more pertinently – keep a watchful eye on her.  

Life after treatment, she was now very glad to say, was much, much improved. 

“So, how’s that sexy mate of James’s, then? Steve, isn’t it?” she asked, smiling with a little embarrassment. “I can’t believe I straddled the man and stuck my tongue down his throat. The shame!” 

Ella snorted softly with a smirk. “Steve wouldn’t have cared at all, trust me. Quite the opposite!” 

“Oh, I know. I could tell that by how he kissed me back,” she revealed, her cringe fading a little. “He was a very good kisser, so that makes the embarrassment that I couldn’t dial my compulsions back a little less mortifying!” 

“As for how he is, he’s fine. Keeps asking for your number,” Ella revealed, watching Andrea rub a hand down her face. “Sorry, shouldn’t I have mentioned that?” 

“No, you’re fine, sweet. It’s tricky because I fancy him, but yeah, that time I briefly met him he was nothing more than a compulsion trigger, so I don’t know. He’s a young, sexy as fuck guy. He likely won’t want to get wrapped up in my mess that I can’t really casually date somebody and enjoy carefree sex, lest triggering my issues. I sort of get the impression that’s what he’s about.” 

Oh, how right she was. “Yeah, he’s a man whore, Ands. Big time. I mean like, he’s fucking lovely, such a laugh and totally cool, but he shags around a lot.” Hester, a girl called Jennie, another she didn’t know the name of, someone called Leonie, the man had his rotation in place.  

“Bollocks,” she huffed, Ella spraying a mouthful of biscuit crumbs. “I guess I’ll settle for just looking at him and how bloody pretty he is when I finally come to see you up your way.” 

All talk of the male species was left there, the friends instead catching up with one another’s lives on the outside. Andrea revealed she’d gotten herself a part-time job at the local pub, The Black Horse, although truly she didn’t need to work with a fully paid off mortgage and all she had in savings gathering a very liveable amount in interest. 

 Still, what she wouldn’t give for her parents returned to her instead. She still cursed that the drunk driver who’d collided head on with their car had survived, albeit in a vegetative state. Perhaps that was the more fitting punishment, though. While they talked, Ella also shared a few of her plans, too, like returning to college.  

“I like, kind of think it makes me a fraud, though, wanting to strive for a career in helping others when I know I’m not one hundred percent recovered yet,” she began, sipping on a fresh cup of tea. She’d been tentatively considering it, perhaps studying for a psychology degree, wanting to specialise and help patients with eating disorders.  

Sighing, she continued. “We went out for a curry not long after James and I reconnected, and it sent me into a spiral. It was pants, mate, sitting there crying outside because I couldn’t cope with eating in an unfamiliar place. Or choosing a food I wouldn’t normally have had.” 

Andrea was thoughtful for a few moments before replying. “Did you ever think that the studies could actually help you more in your recovery? It might give you a greater insight, learning from the other side of the coin, as it were.” 

She hadn’t, it had to be said. After arriving home that evening, she discussed it more with James while she cooked chicken, him supervising the rice as she was – by her own admission – bleedin' useless with it. 

“Andrea is right,” he spoke, jumping up to sit on the counter. “You probably would get a new perspective over it. As for thinking that makes you a fraud and all of that, nah babe. Look at it this way, before your degree, you need to take your A levels first, so that’s two years. All being well, you’ll have finished that degree by twenty-eight, so that’s just over five years into your recovery, innit. You’ll be way more secure in yourself by then, won’t you?” 

“Mm,” she hummed, sighing. “I hate that my illness took such a chunk of my life, time when I should have been making these decisions and studying. I would have been a year away from completion of a degree, if I hadn’t. I messed up big time.” 

“Oi, less of that. That’s my girlfriend you’re badmouthing, dickhead,” he frowned, stretching his legs out to ensnare her, pulling her back into a full body hug. “If you hadn’t gotten ill, then you wouldn’t have decided that this was what you wanted to do, would you? Or met me. Obviously, I’m the more important of the two there.”  

His joke had her laughing, squeezing him tight and kissing his chest. “Of course, baby.” Reaching for her cider, she took a swig, lifting her head to give him a little nibble beneath his jaw before moving back to the cooker. “How was therapy, then?” 

“Yeah, pretty good, you know. We discussed my ongoing anger issues today. Michael made a good suggestion over what I could do to stop it, my desire to batter people who piss me off at the drop of a hat.”  

He’d been doing very well there, up until a week ago while at a club with Ella and a few others. Now much more confident in her body, she had been up on a podium dancing, wearing only a small outfit of hotpants and a cropped top, attracting a lot of male attention. Looking was fine, but when some random bloke had taken it upon himself to climb the side of the podium and make a grab for her, well. He’d met a very irate James, dragging him down by his jeans, his fist meeting his face at speed.  

“What did he suggest?” she asked, cracking fresh pepper over the chicken and turning each butterflied breast, moving to the chopping board to prep the vegetables to go into the wok.  

“Kickboxing. He said it would give me both an outlet for rage, and discipline over when to exert that rage and all that. Think I’m gonna give it a go, innit.” 

She widened her eyes. “War does not need to be any more deadly than he already is!” Her laughter filled the room, even more so at her boyfriend’s entertained smirk. “I think it’s a good idea, really. He seems to have a lot of those, Michael.” 

“Yeah, he’s a top grade bloke. Really fucking sound. Always has an answer for all my stuff, too. So what else is new with Andrea, then?” 

“Oh, the redheaded goddess!” Steve called from the armchair, beginning to grin. “Is she ready for me to give her one hell of a good seeing to yet?” 

“Calm your dick down,” Ella warned, pointing at him with a spatula, “you’ll do her recovery no bleedin’ good.”  

“We’re gonna have to put him in restraints when she comes up for your birthday,  innit?” James spoke, pulling a fresh beer from the fridge.  

Steve turned, his grin wide. “Nah, don’t you threaten me with a good time, Jim!”  

Once dinner had been eaten, a film watched and Steve declaring he was ‘off to play with Leonie for the night’ before leaving the flat, it wasn’t long before they decided to have a good time of their own.  

“Mmm, shit. I don’t even know how the hell you can move your tongue so quickly, but I... ahhh! I’m not complaining!” she moaned, feeling him smile against her as she straddled his head, James happily lying there with her riding his mouth.  

It burned incandescent through her, like a hail of glimmers creeping slow, his hands clutching the rounds of her bum, moving every so often to lay a hard smack. She’d never had a man spank her before, but god, how she enjoyed it when James did. He wasn’t gentle with it. At all.  

While his hands showed no mercy, his tongue slowed, dragging flat and slow through her folds, circling over her clit and repeating the action again. Her thighs shook from the potency of each lick, shuddered breaths leaving her mouth as she panted hard, her gaze falling to see him open his eyes and wink at her.  

Wrapping her clit in a firm suck, the sensation rooted itself in her, sharp-toothed and edging on a little too much, her hips swaying against his mouth. The pleasure dug deep into her marrow as she cried out, the release snapping through her, Ella immediately moving to gratify him by sheathing his cock within her still fluttering walls.  

He weighed heavy in the depths of her, the feeling of her soaking him only gratified further by the prickle of teeth crushing his nipple, her nails grazing like sensual daggers down his sides. She pulled heaven from the very depths of his hell every time he was inside her, not afraid to be as rough with him as he liked her to be, her hand grasping his neck, nails digging in as she kissed him with stormy lust.  

She sucked his tongue, his mouth then gliding to rain soft bites over her neck, grasping her bum and fucking up into her powerfully, the tempo remaining slow burning like napalm. Sitting back up again, his cock pressed firmly as she rotated her hips, hitting her front wall, lightning rolling over her spine, clawing at the black and grey brandings of his upper arms as he reached to squeeze her breasts.  

God, how she loved him, thrived on the thrill of having sex with him, James the sole reignition to her desires as soon as she’d started to feel better. The way he looked at her too, it made her feel incredible about herself, her body confidence restored. She couldn’t thank him enough for having such a part in returning that to her. There were wobbles on occasion, but they were becoming fewer and further between. 

Watching as she fucked him, she’d never seen a sight as sexy, her tall, muscular, tattooed man with his storm grey eyes. He was so darkly alluring, so stunningly sexy, James’s thoughts over her extremely similar. He loved that she finally saw what he did in her, and enjoyed her body as much as he did for the most part. 

The way she moved on top of him had him lost to the sublimity of it, no girl before her doing quite such a thorough job where he’d be content to remain on his back for the duration. It was hypnotic, a rhythmic spell of sexual energy unlike anything he’d ever experienced, her body rolling and undulating like she was made of liquid. Quite simply, he’d never been ridden like that in his whole life. She absolutely blew his mind, this beautiful young woman who he fallen so deeply in love with.  

The pace became more urgent and frenzied, voracity replacing the slower, sumptuous enjoyment that had prevailed thus far, Ella grinding down on him eagerly as he moved beneath her with more purpose, both of them driving deeper moans from one another.   

Each keen undulation caused him to feel sparks flickering his spine, while she had her own bliss pulsing softly, increasing more the faster she moved, fervidly chasing her release as she began to rub her clit, her other hand flexing at his chest, nails digging in.  

A string of panted expletives left her mouth as she felt herself reach boiling point, bubbling over and taking him with her to a gloriously sweet finish, intensity throbbing hard and leaving them both a breathless, shuddering wreck.   

With Ella now taking the contraceptive pill, there was no longer a need to move immediately to dispose of a condom, James pulling her down against his chest, stroking her back as he kissed her deeply. Floaty light little aftershocks skipped over her nerves as her release ebbed away slowly, feeling his cock twitching within the hug of her walls.  

Sleepiness began to settle over her, Ella finally moving to her side of the bed and pulling the duvet and thick, faux fur blanket over them, blocking out the November chill from their bare flesh as he curled around her.  

“Night, babe.” Dropping a kiss upon her shoulder, his arm tightened around her as his head sank into the pillows beneath it. “Love you.” 

“Love you too, my sexy church burner.”  

Yes, it still made him laugh.  

The following morning, Ella rose first, pulling on one of James’s long-sleeved t shirts (this one depicting the logo for the band Venom, who she was becoming a little partial to) her big, slouchy socks as well as her pyjama bottoms, shivering a little as she waited for the heating to come on while making herself a tea.  

Looking over into the lounge area, she noticed a familiar sight, a blanket swathed Snedders lying asleep on the sofa. He had his own key, so it wasn’t a surprise to sometimes find him there of a morning unexpectedly. She guessed there’d be a story to accompany his presence, probably involving his on/off girlfriend, the infamous Kerry. Ella didn’t like her at all, finding her to be very difficult to get along with.  

Making her tea, she moved to the armchair, placing her mug down on the much neater coffee table. In lieu of being able to offer anything towards the rent (which James had dismissively snorted at the suggestion of anyway) she’d taken it upon herself to keep the dwelling tidier and cleaner, padding to the corner where the answering machine light flashed.  

Turning the volume down low so as not to wake Snedders, she pressed play, being informed of three new messages.  

“Hi sis! I need to meet you at half four this afternoon so don’t get there too early. My shifts, the way they’re moving them around, fucks sake! I know it’s only half an hour, but yeah. See you later!”  

Jane, a welcome message.  

“James, it’s only me. Dad and I would love to see you. Are you free to come to lunch at ours next Saturday? Let me know, love.” 

Carole, perhaps not so welcome, depending on her mood. She’d sounded jovial enough, though.  

“Hello, message for Ella Greenhall. This is Sharon calling from Bloomin’ Lovely about your interview. I’m pleased to say we’ve chosen you for the position, if you could call me back at the shop as soon as possible, that would be lovely. Tentatively, I’d like you to start next Monday. Looking forward to hearing from you soon!” 

“Oh my god!” she squeaked, jumping up and down as quietly as she could, clasping her hands over her mouth. “I bleedin’ got it!!”  

Out of all the jobs she’d recently been applying for, the position at the florist just off the high street there in Nuneaton was the one she’d coveted most, Sharon, the owner making her feel so welcome when she’d arrived, the atmosphere so warm and lovely. It was only a part-time position, but with her wanting to start at college again it was perfect for her, Ella able to work in the college hours around her new job.  

When James got up around an hour later, her news brought him booming delight, much less concerned with waking up the sleeping heap of ginger dreadlocks on the sofa than she was. 

“Babe, that’s top grade! I’m so fucking proud of you!” he exclaimed, swinging her around in his arms, a grunt coming from the sofa. 

“Aw, ya got a job, Ells?” Snedders grumbled, emerging from within the swathe of the large blanket. “Nice one, little mate.”  

“Cheers, Sneds,” she chimed, turning then to her boyfriend after he put her down once more. “Also, your mum left a message. Asked if you were free for lunch next Saturday.” 

“Hmm,” he hummed, his jaw setting slightly. “Since that’s your birthday, I’m saying no. Even if it wasn’t, I’d still be saying no.” 

“Well, we’re not doing anything until the evening, are we?” 

He smirked, side eyeing her with raised eyebrows. “I had planned to bounce you on my dick for most of the afternoon.” Pausing, he began to laugh at the lascivious look she returned. “Hold on, did she say anything about you going, too?” 

“Not specifically,” she shrugged, reaching for her cigarettes.  

That was about right for Carole. She knew all about Ella, too, James already having introduced her to his dad, Alan thinking she was ‘absolutely bloody lovely, kidda’ as the man himself had worded it. “Then I definitely ain’t going.”  

“Maybe she meant me too, but just didn’t say it?” she suggested, watching his lips tightening. Perhaps it was best to leave it there, she thought, knowing well now the clear signs of him becoming agitated. “Then again like, maybe she didn’t. You’re not obliged to call her back if you don’t want to, baby.” 

He relaxed then, slipping an arm around her. “Good, because I’m not.”  

As it turned out, though, the lack of return phone call led to Carole reaching out to her son again, James answering the phone to her a few hours later.  

“Does that invite extend to Ella?” he asked, frowning.  

“Of course, it does!” she exclaimed, busying herself with cleaning the kitchen while she jammed the cordless phone between her ear and shoulder. “I’d like to meet this girl your father has told me all about.”  

Even though she was being polite and casual, agreeing to visiting still went against his better judgement. Come the following Saturday, he’d see in hindsight how correct his intuition had been, too. 

[nerdyreaderpapi]

OMG NOOOOO I’M SO LATE! I’m so sorry!! I’ve been so busy this week and work has been kicking ass, I barely had time to read this week🥹🥹 alright here’s my rant, be ready!

1) Ella doing yoga and James watching her!! Top grade married couple right there! My baby’s are so cute, I still can’t believe they’re finally together now!

2) “Immediately, he paused, looking down at the blade. A flash of being on the bathroom floor hit him, remembering the pain, the distress, the blood.”

- JAMES MY BABY! Ugh I feel so bad for him here, my boy has been doing so well and it’s so sad but understandable to see him triggered, in a way I’m glad that it’s happening now so that he’s able to recognize that maybe seeing certain things from his past can trigger him! A tear slipped when I read this ngl!! You’re always making me sob all kinds of tears 😭😭

3) “Baby, come on. Come here. You’re alright,” she spoke comfortingly, pulling him into her arms. Slipping a hand beneath his t shirt, she stroked his back, soft skin flecked with scabs from her nails, her other hand smoothing his hair as he wrapped himself around her, pressing his face against her neck with a groan. The comforting scent of daisies began to soothe him, just as it always had with her.”

- Ells bells being there for him! That was everything, I’m so glad we was present at the time it was happening so that she could help him wind down before the thoughts ran too deep! I love them so much, and I love how quickly Ella was able to recognize James’ trigger!

4) Just her sitting there with him was all he needed, feeling her kiss his shoulder and rest her chin atop the thick plane of muscle, reaching for her hand and squeezing it. “Thanks, darlin’. Feel a bit better now, like.” Both she and weed were brilliant for calming anxiety, Ella perhaps having the greater edge there, James finishing the joint and stubbing it out, pulling her onto his lap as he rested back.”

- SOBBING REAL TEARS!!! May I just say I love how she helped him, it was like she knew what he needed in that moment to just relax a bit! And it worked, I love how they may not voice what they need but they always know what the other needs! My baby’s speak telepathic language 😭😭🥹

5) “I was back there for a second, in that moment. It fucking scared the fuck out of me, Ella. I spent months chasing it, wanting to go back there and succeed, like. Nah. Just holding it again made me see how much I wanna be alive, innit. Don’t ever wanna go back to that darkness.” 

- no words just TEARS…

6) “Nice one, babe. Love you.” 

Ella beamed, racing back over and jumping on him, holding his face in her hands as she smothered him in kisses. “I love you, too!” She hummed happily as they fell into a deeper kiss, James making her snicker with laughter as he pulled her knickers up and began to squeeze and lightly smack her bum.”

- there’s nothing that makes me more happy than seeing my two wonderful, talented baby’s be in love with each other! It may have slipped out BUT IT WAS REAL AND BEAUTIFUL!! WEDDING AND BABY COMING SOON!

7) “Oh fuck,” he exclaimed quietly, his face falling. “I didn’t even think, ya know. I don’t even remember doing it, I just went on autopilot when I was cleaning up the mess. Nah, no excuse though, Jim. I should have gotten rid of it,” he spoke, moving to hug him tightly. “Sorry, man.” 

- oh man I felt so bad for Steve here! Because I know he didn’t do it on purpose and his main concern was keeping his friend alive and cleaning up everything afterwards! STAN STEVE! Love this man seriously!

8) James smirked, lighting the joint. “I can do that later. Suppose I better ask the missus, though.” He paused for a second. “Ella! You up for the pub tonight, babe?” 

A few seconds pause followed his boom. “Yes!” 

“Top grade reply, my darlin’,” he called. 

“Innit!” 

- Ella starting to talk like James is very personal to me!!! She’s going to leave his house talking exactly like this! I’ll beg money on that (monopoly money) Steve’s commentary😭😭😂😂😂 I know James feels SO proud that his Ella is using his lingo! Proud husband 🤭

9) “Nah, nobody gives a shit what you eat. Except for you. Don’t even matter if you can’t finish it, at least you gave it a go, yeah? There’s no orderlies watching over you, you’re just a person whose out with her boyfriend and friends, nobody expecting anything of you either,” he continued, his words beginning to calm her down. He always had a knack for it, deescalating her spirals.  

- JAMES COME HOME THE KIDS MISS YOU!!! This man ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS knows the right thing to say, how to say it and WHEN to say it! The way this man knew how to calm her down from day one MEANS SOMETHING TO ME!! If James has 0 lover I’m simply not here because I will defend this man forever! He’s the best, seriously, the way he takes care of Ella and helps her is GOLD!

10) “Just make sure you brush your teeth before you go near Ella’s lady bits later!” she spoke, the girl herself snorting into her pint glass as she took a sip.”

- this was a really nice way to end everything! I love this! It honestly made me burst out laughing 😂😂😂😂 STAN HESTER!

FYI James, don’t ever eat spicy food again, if you know what I’m saying 😼🤭

Hehehehehehehe

Anyways, I LOVED THIS CHAPTER!! I’m so excited for more! I hope you’re doing well and that all is good with you! Thank you for these beautiful chapters, your writing is always amazing and such a pleasure to read! It always makes me feel happy after such long, tiring days!

I can’t wait for what you have in store for these two! 💗💗💗 take care darling! Until next time (I’ll be stalking my phone for updates)!

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Thirteen.

Apologies for not getting back to comments and reblogs, guys. Life is a bit fraught at the moment between my anxiety and work pressures. I'm only just about able to find the time and mental clarity to post! I love you all for leaving such beautiful comments, though, and I appreciate you for taking the time to do so :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 4,217

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

“Whatever the hell you’re doing, please, don’t stop on my account.”  

He stood for a few seconds, admiring the view. God, that body. Honestly, it was a sight he’d never tire of when coming back into his flat, seeing Ella there. What he liked even more was the fact that after first arriving, she hadn’t actually left as yet. Well, that was partly untrue. The day before, they’d driven up to the huge ASDA supermarket on the other side of Nuneaton to buy food, and so Ella could purchase a few necessities that meant she didn’t have to go home. 

A five pack of knickers, a couple of new tops, another pair of jeans, socks, pyjama bottoms for lounging in, some moisturiser, a toothbrush, face wash, deodorant and body spray. With a few pieces of makeup already in her bag, but not too bothered about being seen bare faced, she was set to stay for as long as she wanted. After seven weeks without one another, they weren’t quite so content to part ways just yet.  

She’d called in with her mum and told her, April cooing and sending her into a pink cheeked mess of embarrassment, telling her to enjoy herself. Oh, she really, really was. 

Pausing from the yoga stretches, Ella jumped to her feet, giving him a big kiss as he placed the massive IKEA bag full of clean laundry down. “I like how bendy you are, innit.” 

“Hmm,” she hummed, her eyebrows raising a few times in rapid succession. “I noticed that with all the creative ways you were bending me around last night.”  

He laughed, low and dirty, smacking her on the bum before heading to the kitchen area. “I will a few more times today too if you like?” 

“I like!” she grinned, standing on one leg, lifting the other behind her and reaching back to grasp her foot as she bent elegantly. It was just them on that Monday morning, Snedders off to try his best at being allowed to move back into his own abode, and Steve over in Leamington Spa, visiting his mum.  

She then flexed herself even further, James’s eyebrow raising sharply as he watched her bring her foot to touch the back of her head. He wasn’t sure a dick twitch was the appropriate response, but it was the one he had.  

“Shitting hell!”  

“A yoga body is a healthy body,” she sighed, breathing deeply before releasing her foot, repeating the same with her right leg. 

“It’s a fucking elastic band, Ells bells!”  

She laughed softly, extending further, her foot once again brought to the back of her head. “That’s what Mary used to say when she supervised my yoga time, make sure I wasn’t like, running in place or doing excessive sit ups.” 

Indeed, at her very worst with her illness, Ella had exercised to extreme excess. Jogging for six miles a day, doing hundreds of push ups and sit ups, all on roughly two hundred calories.  

Clicking the kettle on, he smiled thinly. “I miss Mary, she was so cool.” 

“Yeah, she was the best. Even when she was trying to make me eat carbohydrates and I was sitting there, screaming and crying, calling all the food minging and throwing my plate,” she spoke, her behaviour back then making her feel embarrassed in the present. She’d come far since. “Speaking of which, I want some of that melon we bought. Can you pass me a knife, please?” 

Grabbing the cantaloupe from the fruit bowl, she walked around to his side of the kitchen units, placing it on the chopping board while he moved to pull a knife from the block in the corner. Immediately, he paused, looking down at the blade. A flash of being on the bathroom floor hit him, remembering the pain, the distress, the blood.  

“James? You’ve stopped,” she spoke, her brain quickly assessing the situation. Oh, no, that wasn’t the... Oh, shit. Reaching for him, she grasped his arm, taking the knife from his hand. “Bleedin’ hell, that was the one you used, wasn’t it?” 

He nodded, eyes a little rounded, Ella opening a drawer to place it in and hide it away. He didn’t need to see it. “Baby, come on. Come here. You’re alright,” she spoke comfortingly, pulling him into her arms. Slipping a hand beneath his t shirt, she stroked his back, soft skin flecked with scabs from her nails, her other hand smoothing his hair as he wrapped himself around her, pressing his face against her neck with a groan. The comforting scent of daisies began to soothe him, just as it always had with her. 

“Really didn’t think it’d affect me like that,” he mumbled. She could have slapped Steve for being so thoughtless; to clean the blade his best friend had used to take his own life and simply return it to place, voicing that. “Nah, babe. Don’t be pissed off at him. They’re my knives and they’re worth a fortune. He wouldn’t have chucked it away without asking me. Probably just forgot, innit.” 

His heart thundered against her chest, Ella guiding him over to the sofa and sitting him down, taking the half smoked joint present in the ashtray and lighting it. With a large puff taken, she handed it to him, her hand resuming its stroke between his wide shoulder blades. “Smoke that and calm down. You’re alright, you’re past it now. It’s okay, I’m here.” 

It was the first falter she’d witnessed in him since he’d absconded to his room back at Moor Acres, Ella trying her hardest to be supportive, although she didn’t know what magic words to say in order to soften what must’ve been a traumatic flashback. True, he had the reminders there on his own arms all the time, but seeing the blade he’d used as an implement truly must’ve rocked him hard.  

Just her sitting there with him was all he needed, feeling her kiss his shoulder and rest her chin atop the thick plane of muscle, reaching for her hand and squeezing it. “Thanks, darlin’. Feel a bit better now, like.” Both she and weed were brilliant for calming anxiety, Ella perhaps having the greater edge there, James finishing the joint and stubbing it out, pulling her onto his lap as he rested back.  

She wasn’t sure she believed that, and her face must have revealed it with the soft scrutiny he picked up on. If there was any person in this world he could share with other than Michael, it was her. It was her first, in fact. “I was back there for a second, in that moment. It fucking scared the fuck out of me, Ella. I spent months chasing it, wanting to go back there and succeed, like. Nah. Just holding it again made me see how much I wanna be alive, innit. Don’t ever wanna go back to that darkness.” 

His ability to open up and express where it’d taken him to made her proud, Ella kissing his forehead before her lips met his. “I believe they call that person growth.” 

Immediately, he frowned, pointing a heavily ringed finger at her. “Don’t you quote that old witch at me.”  

Of course, he meant Dr. Beaumont. She had to concede that truly, she wasn’t for everyone. She’d eventually gotten through well with Ella, although the young woman also heavily credited people like Mary and James helping her through recovery, but for him, her methods had not been effective. 

“I think it’s a boarder term rather than a Clarice Beaumont specific,” she declared, moving off his lap and over to the kitchen. “Tea?” 

“Yeah, yeah I was doing that before my brain went splat, wasn’t I?” he hummed, rubbing his eye with the heel of his palm. “Nice one, babe. Love you.” 

It fell from his mouth without him even registering, but god, how true the sentiment was. He’d loved her for months, but declarations of such did not come easily to him, especially not when he’d been so ill upon realising it.  

Ella beamed, racing back over and jumping on him, holding his face in her hands as she smothered him in kisses. “I love you, too!” She hummed happily as they fell into a deeper kiss, James making her snicker with laughter as he pulled her knickers up and began to squeeze and lightly smack her bum.  

“Stop it!” she warned. 

“You fucking love it!” 

True, she did. He knew how to give the good smacks.  

Going back to the kitchen, she prepared the tea and used a different knife to slice herself up some melon, selecting a few more fruits too that she added to a bowl and took back to the sofa. They sat there snacking on them while watching a film, James deciding on The Silence of the Lambs since Ella had confessed she’d never seen it. 

After it had finished, she went for a bath while he sat and played guitar, Steve arriving back after half an hour of his playing. Of course, he had to let him know of the incident that had occurred regarding the knife.  

“Oh fuck,” he exclaimed quietly, his face falling. “I didn’t even think, ya know. I don’t even remember doing it, I just went on autopilot when I was cleaning up the mess. Nah, no excuse though, Jim. I should have gotten rid of it,” he spoke, moving to hug him tightly. “Sorry, man.” 

James could understand that, knowing he’d probably had to disengage his thoughts to an extent in order to get through something as horrific as cleaning his best mate’s blood from the bathroom floor. “It’s alright, but yeah, just don’t get it back out the junk drawer. I’ll go buy another set eventually.” 

His friend looked thoughtful for a minute. “Hold on. Them are proper chef knives, aren’t they?”  

“Yep,” he confirmed, “nicked, most likely. Do you remember when I bought them off that fella in the pub with the duffle full of knocked off goods?”  

He did, now it was mentioned. “Yeah, yeah! You paid like, seventy quid for ‘em and later found out they were worth about four hundred. “Nah, hang on. I have a plan.” Moving rapidly to the kitchen, he grabbed the block, took the suicide knife from the drawer and slotted it back in, leaving the flat at speed.  

James was rolling a joint when he returned, a huge, triumphant grin plastered across his face as he slapped down a wad of twenty-pound notes on the table. “He is redeemed!” he announced, grinning widely. 

“How the... shitting hell, how much cash is that, mate?” he spoke, quickly sealing the joint up and leaning to count it. “There’s three hundred quid there! How did you... how... you just walk out with ‘em and return with three hundred quid ten minutes later? Explain.” 

“Fella downstairs is a chef, ain’t he? Gave him a hundred quid discount and he ripped my hand off for ‘em!”  

Never let it be said that Steven Savage was not a brilliant negotiator.  

“Here, sellers fee,” James spoke, pulling five twenties for the pile and handing them to him. “Go on, I’m up a hundred and thirty. You have that, mate.” 

“Sure?” 

“Before I change my mind, man.” 

“Quality!” he announced, placing the cash in his wallet. “Ka-ching! Pub tonight then, yeah? Or are you planning on pounding a new hole into Ella some more?” 

James smirked, lighting the joint. “I can do that later. Suppose I better ask the missus, though.” He paused for a second. “Ella! You up for the pub tonight, babe?” 

A few seconds pause followed his boom. “Yes!” 

“Top grade reply, my darlin’,” he called. 

“Innit!” 

“Fucks sake. She’s picking up the way you talk,” Steve groaned, James laughing, passing him the joint.  

“Innit?” 

“Nah, I ain’t sitting there with you two parroting each other all night on my own, and being stuck at the face.” Pulling his Nokia from his jacket, he scrolled through the phone book, taking another puff on the joint before passing it back. “Hester! How are ya, gorgeous? Yeah, I’m alright, yeah. You up for a few drinks tonight? Yeah, yeah, I’m heading up The Gallows with Jim and Ella. Alright, see ya there at seven. Bye.” 

They waited on Ella to get ready, finding that she actually fussed much less than either were expecting, zipping her boots up and fluffing her hair before pulling on her jacket. James smiled to himself, noting that it was the first time he’d seen her in a top that revealed her body, the one she chose cropped just above her belly button. It meant her confidence was growing, that she didn’t feel the need to hide in clothes four sizes too big.  

Hester was already waiting at the bar when they arrived, hugging them all in turn, squeaking when Steve gave her leather clad bum a sharp slap.  

“Beast,” she teased, poking him with a long fingernail. 

“Just the way you like me,” he grinned, the pretty blonde turning to Ella and tucking in at her side. 

“We need some serious girl talk, darl!” she whispered, the guys asking what they wanted to drink, both giving their beverage requests before heading off to a table together. “So, seeing him again already after Saturday, hmm?” 

Ella bit the corner of her lip. “I haven’t been home yet.” 

Hester’s mouth dropped open. “Get the fuck outta here! Really?” 

“Yeah, really,” she began, sitting down, pulling her cigarettes out and offering her one. “It’s like we didn’t spend that time apart at all. I’m really enjoying it, being with him on the outside. It’s the simple things, like being able to kiss him whenever I want to without being barked at by an orderly,” 

“Or shag his freakin’ brains out!” Hester chimed excitedly, biting her tongue naughtily. 

“Oh yeah,” Ella confirmed, “there’s been plenty of that!” 

“And! How is he? Are we dealing with impressive merchandise, too?” 

Of course, she’d ask for the dirty details. “He’s fucking amazing, and yes, the merchandise is above average,” she revealed, grinning as Hester clapped and hugged her arm with a squeak. “Not like, freaky big, but oh god. Not small either!” 

“Darl! I am so happy for you!” she enthused, giving her a little shake.  

“Yeah, I’m bleedin’ happy for me too,” she chirped, looking in the direction of the bar with a happy smile. “That’s my man up there!”  

The squeaks continued. “Dude, you’re fucking with War. You have no idea how cool that is! I mean, you’re cool all on your own, such a freakin’ awesome chick, but shit! You bagged one of the biggest hotties on the scene, I swear. Girls line up for that man to be single. He’s renowned for turning girls down if he’s with someone!” 

That was very much who James was as a person, Ella knew well. “And you’re shagging another, so yes, my friend. We have done well for ourselves.”  

Hester nodded, offering her hand. “Put it there!” Ella shook her hand, the pair descending into giggles. They composed themselves by the time James and Steve arrived with them, the former resting a hand upon Ella’s thigh after he sat down, giving her a wink.  

Hester’s words stuck in her thoughts a little, but she truly didn’t notice the validity of them until she glanced around the bar, seeing the way female eyes especially all roved towards their table. It didn’t matter at all to her, that her boyfriend had status as a musician very much coming into prominence, but certainly, her spot seemed to be a much coveted one.  

Finally, after years of being a bullied loser, an antisocial, miserable anorexic, she was now one of the cool girls. It wasn’t of her own merit, though, merely through the man she was with. Or, so she thought.  

On the way to the toilet, she passed by the bar, overhearing a couple of women talking between themselves as they looked her up and down. 

“Well, of course he’d be with someone like her! She fucking looks like a model.” 

Slowing down, she changed her path to the cigarette machine instead, her curiosity piqued. She needed a new pack anyway.  

“No, she’s too cute looking to be a model, but that body. I’d kill for legs like that. And she gets to wrap them around War.” 

“I know! It’s so unfair! Why not me?” the first girl wailed, laughing with her friend, Ella picking up her Marlboro Lights and popping them into her pocket, continuing to the toilet. She’d be lying if such wasn’t a shot in the arm for her, to hear other women especially be complimentary. On her way back again, she caught the eye of them, smiling, receiving the same back before returning to the table.  

Suddenly, she understood how women like Hester must feel all the time. Her friend was effortlessly cool, with her long, dark and blonde streaked curls, her gorgeous boobs and effortless style. It felt strange, but nice. Sadly, it was not to last, though.  

“Ahh,” Hester exclaimed after they left the bar at 9pm, about to move on somewhere else. It could get a bit much for the guys, being on their own territory and thus getting pestered by fans for autographs or pictures. Sniffing the air, she began looking around, trying to trace the source. “Where’s that smell coming from? Is that the new curry house?” 

“Yeah, I went with Dan and Snedders a few weeks ago. Fucking lovely,” Steve confirmed, pointing across the street. “Shall we go?”  

Everyone agreed, although inside, Ella felt her hear beginning to pound nervously. It had been a long, long time since she’d eaten at a restaurant. Eating around James wasn’t an issue, Steve or Hester either. But being in a place where other people were? Gulp. Maybe it would be quiet, though, being a Monday night.  

No such luck, she found upon entering, seeing a rugby team in there still celebrating their obvious win with their various cohorts. Oh, god. Sitting down, Steve ordered a round of drinks while they studied the menus, Ella feeling her mouth drying up rapidly. She didn’t know the calorie content of the food, although she was getting a lot better with not counting every single thing she consumed.  

Where to begin, knowing that it was a fairly large meal, too. It had been years since eating a curry because of the high fat content, panic starting to creep over her, biting her lips together to try and hide the fact she was trembling. It was noticed, though.  

“I probably should have asked you if you were alright with this before we piled over here. Sorry,” James whispered at her side. “Just choose something small, like a side dish if you don’t feel up to anything bigger. No one’s judging you, babe.” 

A side dish. Yes. But what the hell to have? The Indian names of the dishes all began to blur, her heart thundering, palms sweating. Why did it have to be like this? 

“Give me a sec. It’s hot, I need a bit of air.” She was out of her seat and marching for the door in seconds, Steve and Hester looking to James.  

“Yeah, she’s having a bit of a food panic, innit,” he confirmed, Hester’s face saddening, Steve looking confused. He still didn’t really get it, but then he didn’t truly know Ella very well. He didn’t have the understanding that certain foods or situations could spark anxiety, especially after they’d sat together that morning sharing a large plate of Marmite-slathered toast.  

“The poor darl,” Hester cooed softly, James standing. 

“Give us a minute, she might need to just go straight home if she’s too anxious and all that. If she does come back in, though, don’t make a fuss, yeah?” Leaving the curry house, he turned to find her sitting on the steps of the bank flanking the building, wiping her eyes as she smoked a cigarette and trembled.  

“To use one of yours and Steve’s favourite words for Snedders, I feel like such a fucking flid right now,” she sniffed, James coming to crouch before her. “I wish it wasn’t so scary, but my brain just panics and I get myself all stressed!” 

“Okay, take a few deep breaths,” he began, resting his hands to her thighs and stroking them. “What’s the scariest right now? The different food, or the fact you’re not eating somewhere familiar?” 

God, he was so intuitive with her. “Both. Sorry, I’m like, not trying to be difficult, but both!” 

“No one thinks you’re being difficult, least of all me.” Leaning to kiss her, he then continued. “Alright, well a group of pissed up rugby players ain’t gonna be paying attention to anything other than shovelling in curry like it’s their last meal, so that’s something. And the different food, I suppose you can count that as another milestone, innit? Eating something different would be an achievement.”  

He was right. “And I wouldn’t look like a freak for having something small?” 

“Nah, nobody gives a shit what you eat. Except for you. Don’t even matter if you can’t finish it, at least you gave it a go, yeah? There’s no orderlies watching over you, you’re just a person whose out with her boyfriend and friends, nobody expecting anything of you either,” he continued, his words beginning to calm her down. He always had a knack for it, deescalating her spirals.  

Taking another drag on her cigarette, she contemplated a while longer. It would definitely be something she could speak of in triumph when she went to see Mandy, her new therapist she’d been referred to by Dr. Beaumont for continued treatment outside of the facility. “Okay. Let’s go back in.” 

He smiled, kissing her head. “Proud of you, little.” They returned inside, Ella picking up her pint and chugging a huge amount back, lifting the menu again and studying. Although she’d been told not to make a fuss, Hester really wanted to do something to make it better for her friend if she could. Being a vegetarian, it narrowed down her choices, too.  

“Ella, I really can’t decide,” she began, leaning to point at the vegetarian options on the page before her. “Do I go with the lentil daahl, or the spinach and paneer? Or, I could have the veggie bhuna. Arrgh, help!” 

James smiled, watching it. In including Ella’s input over her own choice and cleverly detailing the dish ingredients, Hester was not only giving her information she could easily process, she was making it all a little less frightening for her.  

Ella noticed that they were available as side dishes, feeling herself beginning to calm further. “I think I’m going to get the spinach and paneer, so you can try some of mine if you like?” 

“Then I’ll get the daahl, and you can try some of that!” With decisions made, the waiter came over, scribbling down their choices first, then Steve’s. 

“Chicken phal, boiled rice and a keema naan please, mate,” James spoke lastly, the waiter eyeing him carefully. 

“Sir, this is the hottest dish on the menu. Forgive me, but are you quite sure?” 

“He’s got a cast iron stomach, my friend,” Steve chirped, nodding towards James with a grin. “Spicy things don’t affect him at all. He can eat a raw chili pepper and not even flinch.” 

James confirmed, while Ella and Hester looked at him in disbelief. “It’s true.” 

The waiter scribbled the order down. “One moment, guys.” He headed for the kitchens, returning a few seconds later with a small, white plate in his grasp, a whole red chili atop it. “This I must witness for myself, sir.” 

He expected him to take it and moderately nibble off a piece, his eyebrows raising when James took the chili by the stalk and bit the entire thing from the top. He waited, knowing there had to be some kind of reaction as he crunched through it, James shrugging.  

“That’s really tasty, I like it,” he spoke. The waiter was stunned. 

“Oh my god!” Hester cried, pointing. “You aren’t even flinching!” 

“Mm,” he hummed, washing it down with a mouthful of Coke, deciding not to drink any alcohol at all that night. “I like spicy food, never been bothered by it.”  

The waiter left them too it, muttering ‘crazy white man’ in his native Urdu as he headed back to the kitchens, Hester still in a state of shock at witnessing him do it. 

“Just make sure you brush your teeth before you go near Ella’s lady bits later!” she spoke, the girl herself snorting into her pint glass as she took a sip. 

“Yeah, I ain’t in the market for burning her flaps off.” James spoke, everyone descending into hysterics. Looking at her, he winked, covering her hand with his, glad to see her looking much more relaxed.  

They’d both succumbed a little to what ailed them that day, what they were now gladly on a road to recovery with, and both times the other had been exactly what they’d needed to restore a calm balance. How good they truly were for one another.  

[nerdyreaderpapi]

YAY A NEW UPDATE!!

1) I love Adrien so much! The way he barley left jades side and was there for her! He’s truly the best husband ever, the way he cares and loves her is so deep and truly beautiful!

2) Jade seeing Dime while she was out and in the coma was so heartbreaking, I almost cried with her!! Seriously, you know how to make me cry man! 🥹🥹

3) I love Jade’s dad! I love the way him and Adrien are close and how they speak to each other! It always warms my heart when I see in-laws getting along!

4) JADE MY BABY WOKE UP!! I was so worried about her, seriously all week I thought about her 😭😭 she’s gonna HATE having to rest lol and you just know that Adrien is gonna enjoy taking care of her while she grumbles but lowkey likes it! Oh, how I love them! 🥹❤️

5) Jen my baby!!! I love whenever I see her! I love her relationship with Adrien and Jade, I love the nickname she had for him. “Homeslice” seriously that’s so funny, everytime I see it I smile so hard! #friendshipgoals

6) Serena… when I get my hands on you… I swear, I have serious beef! WE RIDE AT DAWN LADIES!! I mean I may be delusional too but not that much 😭😭 her thinking that if Jade was dead that would make her and Adrien be together 🧍🏽‍♀️

oh man, how I missed this series so much! Thank you so much for updating! I hope everything is going well with you, seeing you lots of love and hugs! You’re absolutely amazing!!

Sky Full of Stars - Chapter Twenty.

Guys, thank you so, so much for your comments and reblogs, and apologies if I haven't gotten round to replying. I'm a bit mentally scattered at present. I'm going to be too busy to update on Friday, so here, you get your chapter early, besties! Enjoy :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen Sixteen Seventeen Eighteen Nineteen

Tag list - In the comments

Words - 5,107

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI!

“Naw, girl. You ain’t staying here. Not your time yet.” 

It was still black. Alone in the dark, she thought she recognised the male voice speaking to her, but it wasn’t possible. He was long gone. Everything felt cloudy, hanging low over her senses like a dense morning fog, her head pounding.  

She could hear the chorus of the song Ramble On by Led Zeppelin playing before she opened her eyes and sat up with a jolt. Her surroundings were familiar, but what the hell she was doing in The Dungeon, a rock bar in the heart of Arlington, Texas, she didn’t have the faintest clue.  

“Did you fuckin’ hear me? I said it ain’t your time yet.”  

That voice again. Spinning around, her heart rocketed into her throat, for sitting there beside her was the man she’d missed since he was taken much too soon from the world eight years before, his curls just as wild and his beard still as bright pink.  

“Dime?” 

He held his arms wide. “The one and only, Burton. Oh, ‘cept you ain’t that any longer, are ya? Getting married an’ all that.” 

“Dime, am I fucking dead?” she cried, reaching to grab his arm, watching him frown. 

“Still don’t fuckin’ listen to me, do ya?” Sliding an empty shot glass over the smooth wood towards her, he filled it with Jack Daniels, nodding at it. “I said it ain’t your time yet! So no, shit head. You ain’t dead but fuck, you ain’t staying!”  

There was a sudden burst of bright light, voices shouting all around, hands grasping at her, machines beeping, one beginning to drone. With a violent shake, she was back out of it, reaching for the glass and knocking it back in one gulp. “What the bloody hell was that?” 

“The medical team working on ya,” he spoke, refilling her glass. “I’ll happen, that light’ll keep hitting on ya. Don’t fight it, no matter how much it hurts. I didn’t get it, man. Never came back for me.” He looked lamenting for a brief second, his face then breaking out in a smile. “Sure is good to see ya, JB.”  

Her lip began to wobble, Dime shaking his head, pulling her into his arms. “Naw, none of this bull crap, little sister.” 

“I miss you!” she sobbed, feeling him pat her back as he hugged her tight. Dimebag hugs always bent your bones the wrong way for as long as they lasted. 

“And I miss you, too, bud. I miss you too.” Leaning away, he sank another shot, refilling hers, too. “Remember when I bought you here after the tour, when y’all didn’t wanna go home, so you guys came and crashed at my place for a month, and we got wasted every damned day?” 

What a month that had been, Jade living with Dime and his longtime girlfriend, Rita, for four weeks of what was essentially an after tour afterparty, Jen and Jess with her, too.  

She smiled, because of course she remembered that night, a gigantic storm hitting Arlington, lightning cracking the sky, the rain pelting down beyond imagination, and she and Dime dancing in it outside of the bar together. It was one of those moments she’d never forget for as long as she lived. 

“Of course, I do.” She remembered it, her heart warm and soft while looking into his kind eyes. “So, if I’m not dead, why am I here?” 

He shrugged, sinking his drink, Jade following suit. “Fucked if I know. I’m just keeping ya company while y’are.” The light hit her again then, the pain indescribable, the machine still droning a long noise. “Hey, stop fighting it, Skip!” 

“I’m not, and don’t call me that! Only Jen gets away with it,” she protested, before once again she fell under the affliction of the light, this time a door crashing open across the room, the entire bar filled with its brilliance. “Dime, I’m scared.” 

He jumped down off the barstool, taking her face in his hands. “Don’t be. It’s gonna be alright. You’ll see.” He pressed a long kiss against her forehead. “Go on. Go. Keep rockin’ it, Burton. Remember who the fuck you are, y’hear?” 

She nodded, a huge lump swelling in her throat. If only she could take him with her. “I will. I promise. Love you, mate.” 

He rested his forehead to hers, blue eyes shining brightly. “Love you too, girl.” The scent of Jack Daniels, weed and Axe body spray lingered in her nose, the smells she associated with him for a few moments before she opened her eyes again, the white light burning, nothing around her, nothing at all.  

While to her, sitting in The Dungeon had felt like a trip of mere minutes, in reality three weeks had passed, Jade rushed in for emergency treatment at a hospital close to home before being flown down to New York Presbyterian via helicopter once she was stable enough to be moved. Her father had organised it, wanting his daughter under the care of a team he knew, the best team she could be cared for by, in his opinion. 

Three stab wounds, two to her lung and one narrowly missing her kidney and significant trauma to her head after she’d collapsed and hit it upon the driveway. She’d haemorrhaged massively, flatlined twice in surgery, been moved to Manhattan and operated on again to fix the persistent internal bleeding that continued to cause issues before being placed in a medically induced coma to allow her brain the vital time it needed to heal.  

Throughout it all, after leaving Italy earlier than scheduled in blind panic once he’d had the heart stopping news relayed to him, one man had refused to leave her side for more than a few minutes at a time.  

“There has been an incident at home. It’s your wife, Mr. Brody. She has been stabbed.”  

Those words had played in his head more times that he’d cared to count in the three weeks between, and they sent his bloody glacially cold every single time. He’d never known fear like it, nor the rage that had followed, how a dangerous lunatic had been on the run from her care facility for two days, and nobody had thought to notify the people she would likely run straight in the direction of. Well, person, as it was, since he hadn’t been home. The truth was, though, she had found her intended target, somehow believing in her broken mind that if Jade was dead, it left the path clear for her and him to be together.  

The care facility had felt every single last drop of his furious outrage when he had called them to speak to the director, wanting to know how the hell they could have failed their duty of care so badly that a patient had not only escaped, but almost succeeded in murdering his wife.  

He was given some bullshit, textbook response, Adrien weighing up whether to take them to court over it. Jade wouldn’t want him to, he knew that, and he did still swing between bringing a private suit against them, even though the police handling the case had said they were currently under investigation for gross negligence because of what had happened.  

Serena was shortly to be brought behind the kind of bars she couldn’t escape, once she herself had been discharged from hospital. It was the only thing that made the whole nightmare even slightly manageable, the fact that his wife had literally beaten her to a pulp in defending herself. A broken cheekbone and nose, a dislocated jaw and a fractured skull. She had, as Katie had coined it, fucked her up good.  

He smiled as he thought of that, never usually the type to take pleasure in somebody else’s pain, but in that instance making an exception. Stretching, he circled his neck a few times, his current sleeping arrangement not doing that or his back much good. Because of who he was, but even more so, because of who his father-in-law happened to be, the staff had allowed him to sleep on a cot at night beside her bed, his refusal to leave her so great.  

Reaching for her hand again, he stroked the soft skin covering her knuckles. “Got your car fixed. Well, Katie did. She took it in a couple of days ago. She’s staying up at the house, looking after everything while we’re down here.  

“You scared the shit out of her, you know. She heard all the commotion, thought there was an issue with the Amazon driver she was waiting in for after hearing all the sirens wailing. Thought he’d crashed or something. She said it was messed up that she was one of the first people to see the aftermath of both you and Jen nearly dying over a space of almost three years and that you could both, and I quote, fucking go to hell for scaring her like that. Cops had to pull her back from kicking the shit out of Serena, even though you did a very good job of that yourself.”  

Her hand twitched on his, and it sent his heart into flutter. There’d been a few little reactions here and there in the twelve hours since she’d been slowly brought around from the medically induced coma, her eyes opening a few times, too. He was told it would be a gradual process, though, her regaining full consciousness. All he cared was that she eventually would. Her prognosis was good, her healing in line with the expectations of her doctors, although she had a long road ahead of her.  

With that in mind, he had gotten himself out of all work commitments and public engagements for the foreseeable, handing everything over to his people to extract him from, his duties as a husband coming first. Oh, she was going to be a nightmare, having to rest while she healed. Of course, he was in it for the nightmares as well as the good times, the fact she would be difficult and try to do too much too soon, the likely tantrums at having to do as she was told.  

Smiling as he thought of her probable indignance, he rested his head down by her thigh, kissing her hand. “It’s way too quiet around here, you in a room and no noise,” he spoke softly. “Well, not that you’re particularly loud when you’re just relaxing at home anyway, but you get what I mean.” Tiredness washed over him in waves, not having slept too well that night, his eyes growing heavy again.  

He fell into the void of restful slumber for a few hours before the door closing roused him, Adrien looking up to see his father-in-law approach, holding out one of the two cups of coffee he’d bought. 

“You look tired, son,” he spoke softly, his eyes kind. Adrien’s utter devotion to his daughter and all-out refusal to leave her side had touched him beyond words. ‘That’s a damned good guy right there, our son-in-law' he’d told his wife as they’d watched through the window on Jade’s second night at his hospital, their precious first-born recovering from her surgery, her husband holding her hand to his face as he’d stroked her arm.  

“I am, but I’m still not going home.”  

Steven laughed softly through his nose. “I think we’re around ten days past me trying to get you to go and rest properly, so I shan’t continue flogging that particular dead horse.” Logging onto the hospital system on the iPad he carried under his arm, he picked out her most recently made notes, studying them before checking her over. When he came to test her pupil reactions to light, a frown creased her forehead, Jade making a soft noise of complaint. “Hey monkey, you back with us yet?” 

“Hmmnrrgh.” Her eyes opened briefly, fluttering shut once more, her dad stroking her head. 

“All in your own time. Lord knows, getting you to rest has been an uphill battle for the past thirty-four years. I suppose I shouldn’t complain that you’re finally doing it.” Turning to Adrien, he shook his head, pointing at his daughter. “As soon as she learned how to walk, when her feet hit the floor for the first time each morning, she would be on the go constantly. Naps? Forget it. I often thought about stapling her to a seat just to get her to rest, but she always had something to do.” 

“Some things never change,” he spoke, knowing that was very much the person his wife was, moving through her life from one project to the next, her drive and determination to fulfil all of her ambitions just as huge as his own was. “I was just thinking to myself that she’ll be a complete nightmare while she’s recovering. Trying to get her to rest is, as you rightly worded it, always an uphill battle.”  

“Get Groucho to lie on her lap. That’ll keep her still.”  

Adrien laughed, thinking of his beautiful, slightly insane dog. “You know, he only does that with you, lying across a lap. He’ll sit next to us, lean on us, but he only does the full flop for you.” 

“He loves his grandpa,” Steven chuckled. “Anyway, I’ve been in surgery for hours, so I’m going to the on-call room to get a little shut eye before I’m back down there this afternoon. I’ll call in this evening on my way home.” 

“And it’s just me and you again, Moo,” he spoke once Steven had left, moving himself to sit on the edge of her bed, reaching for the bag containing all the miniatures of her skincare items, little things Jen knew she used and had gone out and bought. If Jade was a stickler for anything, it was taking good care of herself. “So, this is what I have to start with, after watching the noisy one do all of this for you. Tata Harper hydrating floral essence. Mmm, smells good.”  

He decanted a little onto a cotton pad, moving her hair and gently sweeping it over her face. “I bet I’m doing this wrong, but I feel good husband points should be earned for trying.” He then followed it with her eye cream, something labelled at skin caviar, and finally, the face cream that he’d almost fainted when Jade had told him how much it cost. “I still can’t believe you spend seven hundred dollars on lotion. You’re fucking insane, Burtie. But you have no wrinkles, so it must be doing something. You’d still be a knockout if you had, though.”  

He finished by dotting her lips with the same seven-dollar lip balm from The Body Shop that she’d worn since her teen years, thinking she wasn’t so bad in her skincare that she’d continue to use items that cost significantly less if she liked them. “There, all fresh again, with very kissable, mango flavoured lips.” Leaning down, he kissed them softly, the sensation of her not returning that kiss still somewhat odd to deal with. “Please wake up soon, baby love. You might be right here, but I miss you so much.”  

He sat with her reading over scripts he’d been sent for projects way into the future for the rest of the afternoon, only leaving to head for a cigarette or grab a sandwich. He was fast tiring of them, so later that evening after he’d quickly been to take a shower, there was an extra reason he was happy to return to see Jen wedged in at Jade’s side, reading to her.  

“You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what’s a life, anyway? We’re born, we live a little while, we die. A spider’s life can’t help being something of a mess, with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone’s life can stand a little of that.” 

Charlotte’s Web. It had remained her favourite book since her childhood, Jen holding in her hands the first edition copy from nineteen fifty-two, a little gift for her when she finally woke up. He thought it was the sweetest thing, that she read to her, and had done since her arrival in Manhattan. She narrated anything from current affairs to the books she was reading herself, before a few days prior it had dawned on her that being read her favourite book when she visited would be a nice thing to do.  

At her core, Jen was much more sentimental than she’d ever let on.  

Looking up at he closed the door softly, she smiled, lifting her glasses to her head. “Homeslice! I was wondering where you’d gone,” she began, pointing to the cabinet beside Jade’s bed. “Gotcha dinner. Salmon, broccoli and noodles from that place down the block. I had the chicken version, and it was amazing! They don’t pile it in MSG so it still has that nice, fresh flavour, y’know?” 

Greeting her with a kiss, he gave her a huge hug, very thankful to be looked after so well when she came to visit. It was daily when she could manage it, but at that precise moment in time she was busy working as a session drummer, filling in for Tommy Clufetos on Ozzy Osbourne’s next solo release, which would involve taking over for him for a small chunk of the eventual tour, too. “How’s the recording going?” 

“Pretty good,” she nodded, moving to a seat at the beside instead, Adrien sitting down opposite from her to begin eating. “It’s all relatively simple. I go on there, record what I gotta, it gets sent to the studio on the West Coast and Ozzy either approves it or sends it back with notes on what he wants if he ain’t vibing with it. He’s so easy to work with, though. Such a down to earth guy, man.”  

Adrien remembered that, meeting the legend himself at a music awards ceremony the previous year when he’d attended with Jade and the girls, Ozzy and his wife Sharon very, very nice people. They’d sent a gorgeous arrangement of deep red calla lilies for Jade to the hospital, along with a card wishing her a speedy recovering and sending their love.  

The room was so full of flowers, in fact, that many of them had been taken to be dotted around the nurse’s station, too. Even Cher had sent her roses, beautiful, long stemmed white ones. God, Jade would be so pissed off to have missed out on that particular role, playing the legendary icon, the production’s second choice actress having to fill in at a moment’s notice after the incident that had rendered Jade incapable of fulfilling her obligation.  

“And are you still pinching yourself?” he asked, popping open the takeout container and happily digging the chopsticks in. Ahhh, real food.  

“I am,” she confessed, her smile widening. “It’s a total dream come true, getting to work with Ozzy himself. I still can’t believe it, that he called me personally to ask. Don’t matter that we as a band have been friends with him for years and toured with him before, it still fucking blew me away, y’know?”  

He understood it well. Being sought out by directors he’d always admired still caused him the same amount of excited disbelief, Adrien thrilled for her that she was getting to work with one of her biggest musical influences. 

“Has she moved at all, while I’ve been out?” he asked, gesturing towards his wife with a piece of broccoli he duly popped into his mouth.  

“A few twitches,” she sniffed, “opened her eyes once but nothing other than that. They’re lowering her doses steadily though, aren’t they?” 

He nodded in confirmation, swallowing the mouthful of food before replying. “They have been, yeah. It’s been twenty hours now, though, so she should be coming round more. For a woman who needs such little sleep, this is very uncharacteristic.”  

“Mm, I like a nap, though.” Their eyes snapped to the bed after hearing those croaky, quietly muttered words, finally seeing their girl begin to truly come round more than she had over the past few days. “Hey.” 

“Hey Skip!” Jen cried softly, her eyes filling with tears, pressing the button to the side of the bed to alert the nurse. “Where ya been, huh? We’ve been waiting, waiting, waiting while you’ve been fucking dozing. Lazy bastard.” 

“Fuck you, Jennifer.”  

Oh, she was back, alright.  

Turning to where Adrien had moved to the other side of her bed, she reached out for his face. “Kisses, please.” He was only too happy to oblige. 

“How’d you feel, baby love?” 

“Ouch,” she whispered, grimacing slightly. 

“Yeah, I can imagine.” He beamed, kissing her again. “It’s so good to see you awake.” 

Her eyelids fluttered again, not looking a hundred percent with it. “Where am I? And why aren’t you in Italy?” 

“Well, I was. Do you remember what happened?”  

She nodded. “Serena. How bad did she get me? She had a bat; did she knock me out with it? My head feels like she did.” It was all very fuzzy, her memory patchy where what had happened to her was concerned, only able to remember little flashes. Her eyes then widened. “The babies!” 

“They’re fine, honey. Katie is up at the house with them. They weren’t hurt, just mad as hell, according to the police who attended the scene,” he told her, watching as she visibly relaxed again. “And no, she didn’t. You had head trauma from hitting the driveway when you collapsed, that’s why you’ve been in a medical coma for three weeks. She stabbed you, though. Three times, twice in the lung, and the other just round to the side of your waist.”  

“Three weeks? Shit.” She coughed a little, Jen pouring her a beaker of water, placing a straw in and holding it to her mouth. “Thanks, mate.” Taking a few sips, she felt instantly refreshed, the steady stream of oxygen fed in through the little tubes beneath her nose helping, her chest hurting as she tried to keep calm in the wake of hearing what had happened to her. “I don’t remember it all. I got out of the car, and the rest is a blur. A lot of pain, blacking out. Fuck, my chest hurts. How big was the knife she used?” 

“Small, thankfully,” Adrien sighed, reaching to stroke her face, Jade resting her cheek into the cup of his hand, sniffing as tears began to roll down her cheeks. “Shhh, baby. It's okay, you’re safe.” 

Her left lung ached, taking shallow breaths as she calmed down, gripping his hand hard, feeling Jen stroking her other arm. “Where is she?” 

“St. Joseph’s in Syracuse,” he confirmed, “which is where you were, too. Your dad arranged for you to be transferred here, though. He wanted Lucy to oversee your care and operate on your again. You’ve had two, to fix the damage and then go back in and get a persistent internal bleed patched up.” 

Lucy Cho. She was the best general surgeon in New York, one of Steven’s oldest friends and also Jade’s godmother. “Aunt Luce fixed me up?” 

“Yeah, she did. She’s been in here yelling at me every few hours to go home and get some rest, too.” 

That sounded very much true to Lucy’s form. “And what about Serena now?” 

“Well, like I said, she’s still in the hospital. You banged her up pretty good, fractured her skull, dislocated her jaw and broke her cheekbone and nose. Smashed her head off the back of your Jeep, apparently.” 

A flash of memory came back to her, remembering it, the taillight cracking as she rammed Serena’s head into it so hard, the lens shattered. “I remember that bit, now you mention it. What’s happening next, jail, or what?” 

“She’s under arrest for attempted murder, police guarding her, cuffed to the bed and all that pending a psyche evaluation. If she’s deemed competent then she’ll stand trial. If not, a maximum-security unit for the criminally insane, so the police have told me will likely happen.”  

That was reassuring, at least. Not that her ending up in hospital should have been the catalyst to it coming to that. “At least she can’t escape this time. I’m sure it’ll hit me at some point, the gravity of what happened, but I still feel so spaced out.”  

“You need to rest, babe,” Jen told her, pressing the button again. “Where the hell is the damned nurse?”  

“Which’ll be so easy for me, with you here throwing a fit,” she chuckled, turning to Adrien. “And you look like you’ve slept for about three minutes over the last three weeks. Go home. Go to sleep. That’s an order.”  

“Can’t, don’t have the apartment keys on me.” Jade had never sold her place in the West Village, the abode useful for when they were visiting Manhattan for work commitments, having a place to stay right there.  

“I’ve got your spare set at home, I can get a cab and drop ‘em here within an hour,” Jen spoke.  

He shook his head. “No rush. Despite what the dictator here says, I’m not going anywhere just yet.” Jade opened her mouth to speak, Adrien pointing at her. “No. No arguing. I’m fine.”  

The nurse arrived shortly after to check her over, a doctor ten minutes after that. She had her dressing changed, Jade having a little cry all over again to see the severe bruising and stitched up stab wounds, noticing that a chest drain had been fitted to her as well to prevent her lung from collapsing, as it had in the hours after her second surgery.  

“Will this affect my ability to continue my musical career?” she asked the doctor, feeling tingly with nerves at what she might be told.  

“Not long term, no. You’ll be out of action for at least six months, though. You’re making very good progress, and I’m happy for the drain to be removed tomorrow. I think tentatively, we could be looking at around another few days of hospital care. I want you to be scanned again tonight, so we’ll take you down shortly, but yes, Mrs. Brody. Everything looks good.”  

What looked really good to her was the fact that the food at the hospital actually wasn’t bad at all, Jade choosing a chicken pot pie and fries for her dinner, but only managing half. That was to be expected, since she’d been fed through a tube for the last three weeks. After her scan, she was brought back up, finding Jen still there reading, and Adrien asleep in the chair.  

“Oh yeah, Brody,” she spoke quietly, “sure, you’re fine.”  

“He’s been on a cot every night since you got here at your bedside, refused to leave you. Your dad pulled a hell of a lot of strings for him to be able to stay,” Jen revealed, Jade smiling at her husband, her love swelling. She’d have been exactly the same, should their places be switched.  

“He’s the best.” Turning to Jen, she reached for her hand, squeezing tightly. “Thanks for being here, too. I love you.” 

“Love you too, babe. It’s what we do, y’know? Always gonna be here for my Skip,” she replied fondly. 

She hesitated a moment, wanting to reveal what she’d experienced while unconscious. It was silly, though, she soon reasoned. However, if there was anyone in the world who likely wouldn’t brush it away, it was Jen. “Something happened while I was out, you know. I think... but I don’t know, it might’ve been a dream, but I think I went somewhere else for a while.”  

“Yeah?” she spoke, leaning forward while gently massaging Jade’s hand for her. “Where’d you go?” 

“I’m not sure, but Dime was there.” She felt stupid even speaking it aloud, waving her other hand dismissively. “It was probably a dream. They likely had me doped up with all kinds of crazy painkillers.” 

“It might not have been, y’know?” Jen shrugged. “So, what happened?” 

“I just suddenly woke up and I was in The Dungeon in Arlington with him. I dunno, if there’s some small chance it wasn’t a morphine addled dream, maybe I stumbled into his afterlife or something.” Pausing, she shrugged a little, the corner of her mouth twitching. “He told me that I wasn’t staying, that it wasn’t my time.”  

She snorted a chuckle, lifting her hands expressively before dropping them to the bed, continuing her massaging. “And where else would that motherfucker be, eh? The Dungeon. Damn, I love that place.” Shaking her head, she reached for her hand. “Dream or afterlife, he was right. Wasn’t your time, Skip.” Rubbing between her fingers gently, she sighed, a little somber. “I bet it was awesome to see him again.”  

Jade nodded, thumbing a tear from her eye. “Yeah. Yeah, it was. I hadn’t thought about him much over the last few years, with everything going on. Not until Serena showed up. After Sunni mentioned it, though, what happened to Dime, he’s been on my mind. Maybe that’s why I dreamed about him.” 

“Or maybe, he knew you were floating somewhere between here and the other side, and he did what Dime would have done. Came and sat with you so you weren’t alone and afraid.” Finishing her massaging, Jen pointed at her, beginning to grin. “Stranger things have happened. But all that matters is that you did come back. See that man over there? He was fucking broken while you were out.” 

Looking at her husband, Jade felt her heart thump out warm waves, smiling as he slept on. “If anything does ever happen to me in the future, promise me one thing? That you’ll look after him.” 

“Sure will.” A pause followed. “If this is you giving me your permission to ever hop on him if you did croak, though, I gotta pass, man. Not that he ain’t cute as hell, and you tell me all the time he’s got hella dick game, but it’d be like fucking a razorblade. You know I like ‘em a little fuller figured.” 

“I heard that.” One eye opened across the other side of the bed, Adrien closing it again as he raised his middle finger.  

It hurt Jade like hell to laugh, but god, it felt good to do so. 

[nerdyreaderpapi]

price recs / poly 141 recs

requested by the one and only @vgilantee! i’m so sorry this took so long 😭

mind the warnings/tags when clicking on each link.

like i said with my last rec list, if i think of any others i’ll edit this post to add them, then i’ll reblog this post with a note saying it’s been added to.

in addition, as i was putting this post together, i read all of these recs again. i have reblogs of them all drafted up, even if i’ve already reblogged them before. after i post this, i’ll start posting those reblogs so i’m sorry if it clogs your dash 😅

price:

- the space in between by @391780 (i mean come ON. you know i had to. that series, and early, has me by the neck. i rec anything from early, duhhh)

- the arrangement by @/391780 (as i’m typing this i’ve only read the first chapter and i already KNOW i’m obsessed with it)

- mafia price au by @cordeliawhohung (there’s also pieces for ghost, gaz and soap in the same universe that i recommend as well! it’s all linked in the same masterlist)

- oral fixation by @/cordeliawhohung (foaming at the mouth for this oh my god 😵‍💫 and literally anything by core obviously)

- mask on by @/391780

- the captain’s wife by @/391780

- first time by @/391780

- sick day by @/391780 (so so sweet and what a cute read 🥹 tossing this at char while they’re sick because it’s absolutely perfect.)

- captain’s on the way by @/391780 (once i get that text, oh you can bet your ass i’ll be ready 🥰)

- price returning from deployment by @vgilantee (i recommend anything from char duhhh. if you check in the reblogs you’ll see any additions char has added to this post.)

- kissing price by @/vgilantee (literally the dream)

- subspace + oral fixation by @/vgilantee (oh jeez 😵‍💫 this is still just as hot as when we talked abt it in dms)

- cumming in his pants by @/vgilantee (if you check in the reblogs you’ll see any additions that char has made to this post)

- heavy by @/vgilantee (i know it’s heavy, i just know it. i can hold it—)

- were - price’s cock by @/vgilantee (if you check in the reblogs you’ll see any additions that char has made to this post)

- cockwarming him while sick by @/vgilantee (check the reblogs and you’ll see any addition that char has made to this post)

- devoured by @xxshadowbabexx (woof woof woof oh my god. still barking at this request you filled for me 🤭)

- rules are made to be broken by @/xxshadowbabexx (oh lord oh lord oh lord. foaming at the mouth for this request you filled for me 😵‍💫)

- you stopped sharing your location with price by @syoddeye (one of my first reads that yanked my ass into dark fic 😵‍💫 i need that man)

- barista sized hole by @/syoddeye (god this changed me 😵‍💫 bark bark bark. literally anything from sy!! duh)

- flashing by @/syoddeye (oh i’m gonna need him to chase me thru the house just like that)

- thighs + choking kink by @pfhwrittes (anything from p really. oh this made my fat little heart sing!!!)

- male submission by @/pfhwrittes (i need him i need him.)

- older by @femalefemur (oh lord this spoke to me 😵‍💫)

- calling him captain by @/femalefemur (GOD the title kink/honorific kink was fed with this. i rec anything from cyn, obvi)

- peeping tom i / ii / iii by @secretsynthetic (i wanna say these were the first pieces i read from naomi and ugh, they warmed my heart. i rec everything from naomi, duh.)

- priceghost/puppygirl reader intro i intro ii / i / ii / iii by @/secretsynthetic

- tiger balm by @/secretsynthetic (so so precious. i love pricegaz as a ship and naomi captures it so so well and adding reader into the mix just makes it even better 😵‍💫)

- take me home, country road by @ceilidho (duh, of course. and i think we all know i rec everything from ceil)

- pretending to be husband/wife by @/ceilidho (woof woof woof)

- babysitter au by @/ceilidho

- captain price x reader x captain mactavish by @sprout-fics (this was such a NEED. also i rec anything from her, duh)

- (re)organized crime by @charliemwrites (oh this series is so fucking cute. i’m in love! i rec anything from charlie, let’s be real.)

- price’s thighs by @captainswhore (i love everything they post and i love when you tag me for my thoughts on things 🥺 i rec anything from them)

- hoarfrost i / ii by @eilidh-eternal (the way this feeds my predator/prey kink is absolutely outrageous. i love it so much never stop please 😭 rec everything from eilidh, duh)

- house hunting by @/eilidh-eternal

- nevermind i / ii by @captainfern (these were one of the first cod fics i ever read and whew buddy, it not only infected me with the price bug (that’s never leaving) but its also one of the fics that made me wanna start writing for cod. so i’m absolutely rec’ing everything from fernie 🥹)

- headlock by @/captainfern (rorororo oh my god. y’all know how i am about headlock sex.)

- you know you’re right by @/captainfern (jealous bodyguard price fucking you stupid? oh i need him)

- about a girl i / ii by @/captainfern (i’m always fucking weak for the trope ‘he makes you squirt for the first time and now he’s gonna make you do it like 5 more times if it’s the last thing he does’)

- bury your teeth in me by @yeyinde (jesus christ this was so hot, i’m stunned. i rec anything from lev, ofc.)

- spanked by price by @/yeyinde

- keep quiet by @kyletogaz (woof woof woof! that’s me barking! i rec anything from jess!)

- retirement party by @sentientcave (i need to catch up on this but i’m rec’ing regardless bc i know it’s gold. i rec anything from charlie)

- firewatch by @roosterr (oh this was amazing. i loved their banter!! so cute! i rec anything from rooster!)

- outside it starts to pour by @/roosterr

- john? by @ghastlybirdie (sunny this was so 😭😭 when i first read it (and any time after that) i just about cried bc it’s so!!! so so sad but also precious. it’s so immersive and amazingly done. i rec anything from sunny ily)

- my daddy didn’t love me by @makoodles (oh lorddddd this fed me so well. daddy issues gang rise up 😭 i rec everything from them)

- walkthrough by @mikichko (sosososo cute!! i rec everything from kiko)

- inspections by @moondirti (fuck fuck fuck 😵‍💫 i rec everything from them ofc)

- price + nik inspection by @ghouljams (literal legend, ofc i rec anything from them!)

- backshot hc by @/ghouljams

- landscape with honey by @/ceilidho

poly 141:

- origins of poly 141 x reader by @/vgilantee (keep an eye out for any additions to the post, as always. i rec anything and everything from that au)

- monster 141 au by @/vgilantee (i know it’s not all technically poly but in my head it is, so 😌 and i rec anything and everything from that au) click the tag under that post to find all posts in that au

- #141omegaverse~ by @/vgilantee (idk how to make links for tags unless it’s already made into a link, so go search that tag on char’s blog 😅 and i rec anything and everything from that au)

- price’s girl is the 141’s barracks bunny by @/vgilantee

- mafia au series by @groguspicklejar (y’all KNOW i had to include this. really anything from kelsi ofc)

- from specgru with love by @/charliemwrites (the angst in this is so fucking good. the 141 yearning for reader while readers moved on and leaving them in the dust? AND the jon bernthal face claim for the hot as fuck captain on readers new team? i’m fainting.)

- mister(s) steal your girl by @/charliemwrites (i need to catch up on this one but i’m rec’ing anyway bc i know it’s pure gold)

- tf141 kinks by @/pfhwrittes

- tf141 kinks pt2 by @/pfhwrittes

- tag, you’re it by @/sprout-fics (what a classic. i’m 99% sure i reblogged them a lot earlier in my fandom days but regardless, i’m going through and reblogging everything in this list anyways.)

- omegaverse au by @/sprout-fics (i need to catch up on this but i’m rec’ing regardless bc i know it’s so fucking good.)

- afterburn by @/sprout-fics (what a great aftercare fic, so soft and sweet and heated all at the same time.)

- poly 141 headcanons by @/sprout-fics

- netflix and chill by @luvit (this series was sooo 😵‍💫 the variation of kinks between each one was so hot. also it’s totally obvious that i rec everything from them)

- that man is a dog! by @/luvit (i need to catch up on this but i’m rec’ing this regardless bc i know it’s gold)

- contractor au by @/kyletogaz

- vampire 141 making you cum with a bite by @/kyletogaz

- you, gaz, and price by @kyletogaz

- squirting by @chamomiletealeaf (woof woof this is so fucking hot. i rec anything from them)

- 141 sharing you by @/captainfern

- backshots by @/captainfern

- free use by @ohbo-ohno (oh lord,, that is just the dream. where do i sign up? also i rec anything from bo)

- orgy by @/ohbo-ohno

- fucking machine by @/ohbo-ohno (i know this one isn’t including a reader but its sooo 😵‍💫 that i had to include it)

- body electric by @/yeyinde (THEE call of duty gangbang fic.)

- virgin reader x 141 i / ii / iii by @/yeyinde

- spoils by @/syoddeye

- pack cuddles by @mockerycrow (so so so cute. i’ve reread this countless times. i rec anything from crow)

- spread open by @iciclesses (oh lord!!!!! oh my god 😵‍💫😵‍💫 i rec anything from them ofc)

- they decide you’re theirs by @fulltacs (bowing down to you and your genius brain. thank you for feeding us and for doing the lords work ykwim 👀. i rec everything from them)

- poly 141 therapist sharing au by @kyletogaz (holy fuck holy fuck holy fuck)

- heavy hitters; a wrestling au by @dwarvenales (love love LOVE. i rec anything from kai ofc)

[nerdyreaderpapi]

hear me out 🫵🤠✋ what about a Price one-shot where Price takes the readers virginity because that’s what the reader wants and the reader squirts all over his fingers and he wants to see more of that.

idk, it’s something i’ve been thinking about for a while since I saw smth about TF-141 nsfw canons or smth where the reader squirts so yeah. 🥹🙌

About A Girl

Captain John Price x fem!reader

[“About A Girl” by Nirvana]

[18+]

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• summary - price takes your virginity lol. • rating - 18+ • wordcount - 1.8k • warnings - fem!reader, virgin!reader, fingering, unprotected piv, uh a bit of 💦, praise, price whimpers a lot in this i just realised lmao, strong language

✿ *rubs hands together* hearing you out?? love, i’m all ears. me rn:👂👁️👅👁️👂

this starts really abruptly lol. no soft launch for this porn 😔☝️

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“I want you to take my virginity.”

Those seven words… you’re pretty sure changed your life forever.

You said that twenty minutes ago. Now, you were lying across Price’s bed, your clothes stripped completely from your body as Price, his shirt missing but pants still on, worked a thick finger into you.

“Shh, shh, I know, darling,” Price shushed you, dragging his finger in and out of your cunt. “You’re doing so well for me. Being so good.”

You breathed deeply, the sting inside you soothing as he stroked your inner walls. You were tight around the single digit, sucking it in with lewd noises that made your stomach flip in embarrassment.

After a moment, you felt the stretch increase as he pushed another finger into your dripping cunt. You writhed against his bed, arching your back with a moan. He was placing kisses along your belly and thighs as he pushed two fingers in and out.

“There you go, that’s it,” Price whispered, watching his fingers moving inside you. “Such a good girl. Let this pretty cunt take another one. Just two, darling.”

His pace increased. You moaned, pleasure overriding the discomfort. You panted, skin shining with perspiration as Price’s two fingers thrusted into you. They were stretching out the tight heat of you, slamming against that gummy spot within that had you jerking your hips to meet the movement of his hand.

“Price…” You whispered a moan of his name, and it made him groan from his position near your legs.

He humped against the bed momentarily, trying to alleviate the pressure built stiffly in his cargo pants. He stopped, huffing deep breaths, continuing to thrust his fingers in and out of your sopping hole.

“So good for me,” Price whispered, nipping at the plush skin of your hip. “Can… can you take another one?”

You know it’ll hurt like a bitch, but you still nodded anyway. Much to Price’s delight: who moaned, deep and rich, and it made your cunt pulse around his fingers.

“Fuck, such a good girl, love. My good girl, my pretty girl,” Price said, his praise distracting you as he added a third finger. You choked on a whimper, feeling so full. “Gotta stretch you out, nice and good. Gotta make sure my cock is gonna fit in this pretty cunt, darling.” Price whispered, watching his three fingers plunge in and out of you.

You could feel yourself dripping; arousal pooling down the bare curve of your arse, smearing across the soft skin of your inner thighs. You were so wet for him, for Price. And he loved it; loved the way droplets rolled across his wrists, how his entire hand was slick and wet. His cock ached painfully in his cargos.

You’d masturbated before, so the appearance of a tight spiral in your lower belly was not strange. However, something felt different. It was approaching fast, your cunt fluttering and pulsing around his three fingers. Your moans were becoming more desperate, more whiney as you hurtled towards the edge.

Price maintained rhythm, fucking his fingers into you and making you squirm.

“So good,” Price practically whimpered, watching you, eyes raking down your naked form. “So good for me. Such a good, wet cunt. Bloody dripping.”

“Price, fuck—” You moaned, his fingers not missing a beat, drawing continuous wet sounds from your cunt. Your arousal was excessive, to say the least.

Price hummed. “Gonna cum, darling? Go on, then. Wanna feel you squeeze my fingers, nice and good. Cum all over my fingers, pretty girl.”

The spiral inside of you snapped.

And when you came with a moan and a shiver and a jolt of your legs, you also felt wet.

A gush of your arousal flooded out around his fingers, a small amount squirting out onto his chest. He halted the movements of his fingers, shocked at the way small droplets of your milky arousal splattered across his bare torso.

You panted, sitting up on your elbows and looking at him, eyes widening as you took in the sight of his drenched arm and sparkling-wet chest. You felt your face burn as he met your gaze, a mischievous glint in his dark eyes.

“Bloody hell…” Price looked at you, groaning beneath his breath as he clambered off the bed.

You were so fucking embarrassed— your cunt was still pulsing and you could feel how wet you were. How wet the sheets beneath you were. You wanted to cry out of sheer humiliation, before the sound of Price’s cargos hitting the floor got your attention.

Price crawled back onto the bed, hovering over you. His hard cock pressed to your bare thigh, and you whimpered as you dropped onto your back once more.

“Price…” You mumbled, embarrassment coursing through you as you tried to cover your face with your arms.

He stopped you, placing a gentle kiss to your lips. “Don’t hide from me.”

“That was so fucking embarrassing.”

“Embarrassing?” Price queried as the warm head of his cock settled between your plush thighs. “How?”

Your breath hitched at the feeling of his cockhead pressing against your sopping folds. “I… I— oh my god— made such a mess.”

Price hummed a chuckle. “Love, that’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“I’ve never done that before. I didn’t know—”

Price shushed you with a deep kiss, licking into your mouth. You hummed, fingers wrapping in his hair as his tongue drew pitched moans from the back of your throat.

Pulling apart, connected by a thin line of saliva for just a second, Price stared down at you, cock still nestled between your thighs, touching your core gently.

“Nothing to be embarrassed of,” Price assured you. “Matter’a fact, I wanna see you do it again.”

He grabbed the base of his cock, running it up and down your soaked slit. You trembled beneath him, breathing deeply, your body burning up.

“Want you to make even more mess,” Price whispered. “Want you to make a mess all over my cock, okay, pretty girl?”

You nodded frantically, suddenly no longer embarrassed.

In your defense, your captain was about to fuck you, and your brain was completely focused on that.

Price took a deep breath as he settled his cock at your entrance, rubbing and squeezing the flesh of your thighs supportively.

“You sure about this?”

“Yes, oh my— just, please, Price.”

“Okay, okay,” He shook his head, bemused. “But… but if it hurts, I’ll stop, understand?”

“Understood.” You really sounded like a soldier then.

With a shuddered exhale, Price gently pushed into you, cock breaching your dripping entrance and inching inside. You mewled loudly, arching your back and skimming your nails down the broad expanse of Price’s shoulders. Your eyes screwed shut as Price pushed in, inch by inch. A stinging pain, sharp and pressured, ebbed somewhere inside of you— but it didn’t last. After a moment, Price was nestled deep inside you, and the pain was subsiding as he moved his hand to stroke your tingling clit.

Price stilled himself, breathing heavy. He made a couple of low noises beneath his breath, quiet grunts, before he placed kisses across your face.

“Perfect, prefect girl,” he whispered, kissing your lips. “Taking it so well. Being such a good girl, all for me, eh?”

He sucked a bruise to your jaw as he slowly pulled out and then pushed in at the same slow speed. You writhed beneath him, pain gone as pleasure overtook. His cock slid against your slick gummy walls and it made you call out— call out his name, his rank.

“That’s it, good girl. Such a good cunt. So wet ‘n so… fucking… tight,” Price gritted, pace picking up. “My pretty girl… who’s making you feel good?”

You whined at him, praise soaking you even more. You let your hands flex over the strong muscles of his shoulder blades.

“You, Price—!” You moaned just as he pulled out and slammed right back in.

“That’s right,” Price growled, hips meeting yours as he began fucking you into the mattress. “Thats fucking right, love. S’me making you feel good, yeah? S’me making you squirt and make a mess.”

You began to feel another orgasm build within the confines of your abdomen. You were arching off the bed, breasts rubbing against his chest. You scraped your nails down his back, anchoring yourself to him as he continued to fuck his cock in and out of you. Each pull dragged ragged noises from your mouth, which he took the time to capture in his own mouth, kissing you hard.

That same hot feeling was overtaking you, cunt spasming around his cock and pressure building somewhere inside you. It was making you whine, stars bursting behind your eyelids as you screwed them shut.

“Uh-uh, darling, open those pretty eyes,” Price breathed, voice strained. “Wanna… huh, fuck— wanna see you when you cum ‘round my cock.”

You forced your eyes open, meeting his, just as the pressure inside you came to a crescendo.

“Make a mess, please, come on.” Price whimpered, desperate, as he slammed into you.

You did.

When you came with an airy, fucked-out moan of his name, you felt that same wet rush— a pleasurable warmth squirting from you for the second time that night, splattering his lower abdomen, drenching his cock and pelvis.

Price moaned.

“F-fuck, thaaat’s it. Good girl, darling.” He uttered, breathing out more moans as he continued his movements.

He shifted his gaze from your face, to where your cunt was drooling around him, making obscene squelching noises that filled the room alongside the slapping of skin, his grunting moans, and your overstimulated whimpers.

“I know, pretty girl, I know, almost there,” Price kissed your face as you whimpered, clinging to him. “Such a tight, wet cunt. Not gonna— fucking Christ— not gonna last.”

And he didn’t last.

With a guttural groan, he pulled out and came across your tummy. He pumped himself through it, and you watched as he titled his head back, groaning through gritted teeth. After a few moments, he leaned forward slightly, whimpering as he tugged at himself, the last few drops of his spend hitting your navel.

He then collapsed onto you, and you giggled when he lay his entire body atop yours. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, placing hot kisses to the skin while you wrapped your arms around him, breathing him in.

“You alright?” He asked you, muffled against your shoulder.

You laughed. “I’m good. That… that was good.”

He laughed into your shoulder too. “It was.”

A few beats passed before he begrudgingly dragged himself off of you. He kneeled beside you on the bed, running a finger down your stomach and smearing his seed across your skin.

“You made a right mess, didn’t you, love?” Price whispered, nodding at the mixture of yours and his cum splattered across the bedsheets. Not to mention the amount on both you and him.

“S’your fault.” You said simply.

He smiled. He couldn’t argue with that.

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[nerdyreaderpapi]

hi im in love with u and ur works ! they make my primal hindbrain go !!!!!!!!captain price!!!!!!!!!!!!!

may i … pls humbly request ….

have you ever seen one of those glass sliding doors that don’t actually let you see inside a person’s house ? Yeah ! Privacy film or wtv. Lets you see out but people can’t see in.

its just i’ve been haunted by the idea of captain price fucking his lover against one of those from the inside and their lover doesnt know about the privacy film that he’s just installed—

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About A Girl pt. 2

Captain John Price x fem!reader

["About A Girl" by Nirvana]

[18+]

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• summary - what the request says lol. • rating - 18+ • wordcount - 777 [so short i'm sorry] • warnings - fem!reader, unprotected piv, praise, strong language

look i've got to the stage where a lot of nirvana song titles are just... absolutely insane 😭 so imma just start doing separate parts for already existing fics lol

this can be read as a stand alone but it takes place in the same "universe" as about a girl x

btw there is no soft launch to this porn. they be straight fucking under the cut !!!

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"P-Price, fuck, s-slow down—" You moaned as Price literally fucked you against the window of his flat.

You had your entire naked front pressed to the cool glass, palms flat and keeping you steady. Price had forced your legs apart with his legs, and was now stuffing you full, grunting into your shoulder.

He was still dressed, too— shirt on, pants barely dropped to his thighs. When he got home from a long day at work to see you in next to nothing on his couch, he short-circuited.

Now, he fucked his fat cock into your wet hole, appreciating the slick glide and the pornographic sounds eliciting from both your mouth and your cunt.

When he first pressed your naked body to the window, you freaked out. His flat was only a couple of storeys from the main road, and with the lights on behind you, you'd surely be illuminated for whoever wanted to look up and appreciate the night sky.

But Price didn't seem at all worried. Hell, he didn't even seem to care. He just speared his cock repeatedly against the spot inside you that had your back arching, the heat from your body fogging up parts of the window.

"P-Price..." you stuttered again, cheek cold to the glass, the rest of your body burning.

He held your hips, keeping you pinned, motionless, to the thick pane of glass as he used you. He was grunting into your shoulder, letting his teeth skim the taut skin over your shoulder blade. His cock rutted into you, desperate, hips slamming to your backside.

"Yeah, darling?"

Your climax approached, dizzying your brain. But still, something in the back of your mind was making your heart flutter anxiously. Price's words were calming, though. Calming your racing heart and reverting your mind back to the numbing pleasure that was fast approaching.

"What— ah, fuck— someone sees— hngh— us— hah, Price, please."

Price chuckled lowly. You could barely get a sentence out; one of his hands snaking around your body, pressing a rough-padded finger to your swollen clit. You mewled, a desperate whiney sound, legs beginning to tremble.

"You scared someone'll see us, eh?" Price whispered low in your ear. "Scared someone'll see how well you take my cock? How desperate you are for it?"

You moaned, loud, cheek pressed to the cool glass. His words made your stomach twist in excitement, amplifying the hot approach of your orgasm. You bucked your hips backwards to meet his thrusts.

"You're not scared, are you, pretty girl? You want everyone to see how good you look all fucked out, stuffed full, eh? 'Course you do. Just look at you. So fucking pretty— so fucking tight—" He grunted into the back of your neck, sucking a kiss there.

Maybe he was right. Maybe you didn't care if anyone saw you. Saw you pressed, naked, against the window, getting completely railed by Price. The thought made your body warm up tenfold, skin shining with sweat.

You whined. "Price, gonna—"

He didn't reply verbally. But he knew, obviously, by the way the finger on your clit redoubled its pace, and his thrusts continued to drive into that spot inside you making you spasm around him. You came with his name on your lips, repeated like a prayer, as he fucked you through your rattling orgasm. Rattling, because you felt as though your entire body was humming against the glass.

"There you go, there you go," Price muttered into the curve of your shoulder as he retracted his hand from your puffy clit, focusing now on grabbing both of your hips. He continued to rut into you, your body rocking against the glass, smears of condensation appearing. "Almost there, darling, almost there. Fuck, just like that. Perfect... perfect... so good for me." His words were almost incoherent, his teeth skimming along your shoulder and neck.

Hopefully he just bit down.

What, who said that? lol

"So good, so good..." He drawled, thrusts becoming sloppier, before he did sink his teeth a bit harder into the curve of your neck to stifle his groans as he came, filling you hot. He laved over the bite mark with his tongue as he lazily thrust into you a couple more times, massaging your hips with his large hands.

He sighed against you as the both of you calmed your breathing, still connected.

"No one can see in, love," Price admitted. "There's a privacy film up. No one can see us."

You chuckled, managing to turn slightly in his hold and press a kiss to his cheek. "I figured as much. I didn't take you for the exhibitionist type anyway, captain."

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ok i ended it here cause i'm lazy lolol hope it was ok mwah x