nessafae

[nessafae]

tiktoks with vine energy pt. 12

[nessafae]

one time a guy i know whose girlfriend was heavily pregnant didn’t tweet anything for a whole day so i texted him ‘congrats on your baby’ and made him think i had some kind of baby precognition 

[nessafae]

[nessafae]

Home protection ideas for ladies. Stay safe, queens!

[nessafae]

why don't people in zombie apocalypse stories ever just wear suits of armor? you think any zombie is gonna get their shitty rotting jaws through this?

I'm gonna rip and tear my way through the zombie apocalypse completely unharmed because none of the undead hoards will be able to get through my plate mail

[nessafae]

them discussing a potential mamma mia! 3 (presumably titled mamma mia! here we go again my my) is such a delightful concept to me because they have already soo fully exhausted every usable abba song. they were already stretched to when i kissed the teacher and waterloo by number two genuinely what would they use

[nessafae]

this picture 😭😭 I can’t really explain what I find funny about this

[nessafae]

[nessafae]

Lakes and graveyards are very similar in that if you detonate a large explosion inside either one a lot of dead bodies come to the surface.

[nessafae]

[nessafae]

found this three year old draft buried in my files. is it funny? I don't remember

[nessafae]

I saw some weird ass conspiracy video thing today of like 'we were never meant to have access to yeast, that was cultivated in a lab and it harms us' bullshit and I was like well first off there's no such thing as 'meant to' and second of all um? the long history of acquiring yeast from beer foam stretching so far back ??????

[nessafae]

The term "book of the dead" doesnt really give you perspective to how big a lot of Egyptian funerary texts are.

Imhoteps book of the Dead is 64 feet long.

[nessafae]

He’s been getting away with it for years. No one on the crew has caught on yet.

[nessafae]

[nessafae]