nicolovesmonstrosity

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

This shattered me.

I wanna eat a meal with you like other couples.

Fellow Travelers (1x03)

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

Fellow Travelers Animatic

a short animatic I drew of Tim drawing Hawk while listening to Jo Stafford's "You Belong To Me," a song which was mentioned by Tim in a particularly heartbreaking part of Thomas Mallon's book. I've been so obsessed with these lyrics because of how devastatingly well they feed into Tim's romanticizations, all while delivering a painful reminder of what he can never have from Hawk. He can never "own" him, even though he knows it's not true the other way around. I'm also so in love with the cinematography of this show and the use of amber lighting throughout to represent their happiest intimate moments -- I always felt it was most intense in Tim's apartment during those early years. This short scene I've made is completely made up, but I just felt I had to draw it once I started imagining how Tim would react to hearing this song on the radio. Knowing that Tim can draw (from the book) and how he often thought of himself and Hawk when he heard certain songs on the radio, I needed to combine that with the artistry of the show. The act of drawing someone is already so intimate, and that emotion can be multiplied tenfold when the one perfect song comes on by coincidence.

I made this as a thank-you to Ron Nyswaner, whose been showing so much love to the Fellow Travelers fan art community these past few weeks and months especially. I'm so so grateful, not only for this beautiful show he created and for every piece of himself he put into it, but also for how much he's engaged with the love from fans.

I posted this on instagram around 4 weeks ago -- my account on there is (@haimaiyama) but just wanted to post here as well

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

apparently i'm not done ranting about the corinthian, i THOUGHT i was but apparently not

the show seems to have this fundamental misunderstanding of nightmares as a whole and their roles in the dreaming, reducing nightmares to something "evil"(you can see it with gault in season 1), and it seems to think the others dislike for the corinthian comes from him being a nightmare when. thats not the case??? the other dream kin dislike for the corinthian comes from the fact he went to the waking and started FUCKING KILLING PEOPLE

Like. im pretty sure other nightmares dont even like him because of that????

Nightmares have roles in the dreaming, they’re not evil, they’re humanity's fears manifested, and cori is the nightmare arcana, the dark mirror of humanity's worst, the fact that in the show they take away everything that makes him a nightmare because he's "good" and better now just. It just fucking sucks

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

NOTICE: As more and more fanfic writers are using generative AI for their works (you uncreative dweebs), I hereby swear on everything I hold dear that I have not and will NEVER use generative AI in ANY of my written work. Everything I post will be organically and creatively my own.

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

FELLOW TRAVELERS (2023) + LGBTQ History

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

this is why fellow travelers was such an important show and i’m so glad it was made when it was. it’s not just about the sex scenes and whatever else people reduce it to. this shit was our REAL history and it’s happening all over again. t*ump was the protégé of roy cohn and roy cohn targeted the queer community in the mccarthy era and now it’s happening all over again.

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

i took revenge on you.you got revenge on you ( ゜,_ゝ｀) based on a post by knifetwisters < 3

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

your friends are shitty 

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

Kinktober 2025

Some rules for submissions:

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

honestly, especially in the current state of the world, you all have GOT to kill whatever puritanical voice inside your head keeps insisting that if something is erotic it has no social, artistic, or intellectual merit.

stop acting as if someone can’t enjoy both erotica and literary fiction or classics. it’s not some dichotomy.

stop acting as if erotic art can’t be poignant and meaningful. and that includes all erotic art - not just fine art.

stop insisting that sex scenes or erotic material ruin movies and shows just because you, personally, get icked out watching it.

no, not all erotic art is high art, and not all erotic art is meant to invoke deep intellectual discussion - but insisting that makes erotic art valueless, a disservice to intellectualism, or whatever else - does nothing but add fuel to a fire built on conservative ideology.

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

just clanking at this moment when jack looked scared

boy, he was fucked on that station 😭🚨

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

facts about jake people forget

hes insane

his alcoholism is just a manifestation of his Over All addictive traits. he doesn't like alcohol, he likes being Not Sober, he does not like Being Drunk

his ass is flat

hes scared of animals

hes likely also scared of fire

he watches movies because he likes pretty shapes and colors. he is not a film critic. youre thinking of dirk. strider. dirk strider analyzes movies. thats dirk. you forgot Thats Dirk. Dirk Analyzes Movies. JAKE DOES NOT ANALYZE OR CRITIQUE MOVIES. HE LIKES ALL OF THEM. HE LITERALLT STATES HES NEVER SEEN A MOVIE HE DIDNT LIKE. AVATAR WAS MEANT TO BE AN EXAMPLE OF HOW JAKE SHUTS OFF HIS BRAIN IN MEDIA. TO JAKE AVATAR WAS HIS FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH ACTUAL MEDIA ANALYSIS AND HE DID A PISS POOR JOB AT IT.

hes a hoarder

hes catholic but only Kind Of. he knows who satan, lucifer, and the devil are. he seems to have very little grasp on what God is.

he speaks to his hallucinations in public and either doesnt realize or doesnt care that its not socially normal.

jakes relationship with hal can be understood as him seeing hal as a Not Real Person which means hal is a "safe" target to release his anger onto.

jake stopped liking dirk because dirk began micromanaging jake just like jane did because jake gives the impression that thats what hes into when it isnt.

jake didnt fucking lead jane on at all i dont know whg people keep saying that THATS NOT WHAT HAPPENED AT ALL ON EITHER SIDE. NO ONE LEAD ANYONE ON OR WAS LEAD ON. THATS NOT REAL.

jakes addiction problems started with the lolipop juju not with alcohol

jake didnt have a shower growing up

jake has only ever met and seen and talked to one (1) Living Human Person in his entire life and it was his grandma. who died when he was six and he had to burn her corpse

jakes idea of modern societal things (cars, grocery stores, school, etc) all come from shitty action movies he has never seen A Real Car Before

he canonically has a speech impediment

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

non homestuck dont understand. if you have cosplayed terezi, sollux, or dirk at  ANY point in your life you have bought shades from the same man. like its literally just one man whos making HUNDREDS of pairs of specialty cosplay glasses. it is literally JUST one man who makes those glasses on the entire internet

[nicolovesmonstrosity]

"I didn't like s1 corinthian, he was gross. but s2 corinthian is amazing and gives such puppy dog, golden retriever energy."

well, s1 corinthian was for the cunty camp gays. so yes he wasn't meant for you to like.