nightshadeandcircaea

[nightshadeandcircaea]

I fucking love wizards just fucking wild magic guys

[nightshadeandcircaea]

Caught a normie struggling in one of my snare traps and wordlessly slit its throat

[nightshadeandcircaea]

bro last night was totally redacted! last night was fully expunged from the record. bro, do you... can you remember last night? what did we do...? what did... did we hurt someone? bro? why won't you look at me? what did I do...? whose blood is this...? bro...?

[nightshadeandcircaea]

*strokes long, white beard*

Yes, I think I will have another cookie

[nightshadeandcircaea]

clap along if you feel like a wraith without a tomb!

[nightshadeandcircaea]

“I want to decompose in a bog” well you clearly don’t know the first thing about bogs. Clout chaser

[nightshadeandcircaea]

“Why are you scared of dating” I’m not scared of dating, I just haven’t found anyone’s company to be more enjoyable than my own. And also I don’t care

[nightshadeandcircaea]

i could survive my own autopsy

[nightshadeandcircaea]

BY THE POWER OF GAY SKULL

[nightshadeandcircaea]

blissfully unaware of any UI changes because the evil skull protects me

[nightshadeandcircaea]

staring blankly at the sun i should not be perceiving this much

[nightshadeandcircaea]

Ah, yes, I see you’ve taken notice of the fine knight I keep dangling in a big gilded cage above my evil throne. Quite the pretty little ornament the would be savior makes, wouldn’t you agree~?

What? No, it IS a big cage. That’s- it’s the standard size for a knight’s cage I’m pretty sure. NO I’m not going to invest in 500 square feet of dungeon, it’s ONE knight! I’m pretty sure knights live in hovels in the wild anyways which is basically the same- Look, the cage is quite literally gilded. He loves the cage! He loves obediently preening in the cage! Yeah well, when you capture your own knight you can keep it in whatever size castle you want to, but this one’s mine. Especially since you’re so obviously jealous of me and my cute and awesome knight anyway.

[nightshadeandcircaea]

[nightshadeandcircaea]

man, throwing down his sword in outraged disgust: No! This is not what I signed up for! There are limits to how low even someone such as I is willing to sink.

me, pausing in the middle of loading another hostage into the trebuchet: Dude I asked you what you want to do, and you said that you don't care, and that you're down for anything for as long as we're hanging out.

[nightshadeandcircaea]

i am nooooot locked the fuck in. im locked the fuck out. call the locksmith

[nightshadeandcircaea]

you knock on my door and hear loud barking and scrambling noises and me yelling "no!! down boy!! down!!!" and then when i open the door there is a single crab on the floor

[nightshadeandcircaea]

huge shoutout to trees and also rain