niksrandomshit - Tumblr blog

[niksrandomshit]

loving the mr bonzo leitneresque hate train because personally i find this fucker one of the funniest things sonny jims has ever written for this universe. what do you mean a government organisation has a list of supernatural assassins and one of them is a sweaty hungry lap dancer monstrosity who used to star in a children’s tv show and now crashes bachelor parties bringing frankly rancid vibes. are you shittin me i love this guy

[niksrandomshit]

Hey haha. Remember the lying glitch? Yeah, it didn't go off when Alice said "I don't wonder. I know." about the question who benefits from all this. Do with this information what you will.

[niksrandomshit]

let’s talk about bonzo. fucking asshole shit face bonzo, can’t even buy his own motherfucking house bonzo, lunchbox in comic sans frankly embarrassing goddamn blobby knockoff bonzo. i REFUSE to call that waste of space “mister” because he is undeserving of my time and respect. He’s a freak and gets paid to murder people, LIKE WORKS FOR THE FUCKING GOVERNMENT OF THE UNITED KINGDOM and he STILL lives with Nigel Dickface. From the moment I had to see his ugly ass yellow eggplant-for-a-nose face during the ARG i knew he was a piece of shit and guess what? time and time again i am proven right. If I ever have to hear him and his jaundiced ass again i am going to end the episode, unsubscribe from protocol, delete spotify, and scream. I want him to die a death where he is ground up Mikaele Salesa style, or maybe has each of his stupid motherfucking orange spots popped one by one. Do not come to me with your defenses for this sickly excuse for a creature. I don’t care whether he is a bear or a twink or a twunk he is BONZO he is SHIT and i HATE HIM. Stupid cocky asshole has a goddman theme song with children singing about him WHERE DID THOSE CHILDREN FUCKING COME FROM he is ugly and i haet him. fucking illiterate piece of televised garbage i hope nigel dickenass wakes up in a cold sweat every night because he created such an abhorrent monstrosity. i hope he knows it lives in his stupid fucking house wearing a stupid fucking fedora and i hope idiot loser bonzo kills him and then kills itself. i would celebrate his death every year with a cupcake that says I HATE FUCKING BONZO.

[niksrandomshit]

Bird Dudeeeee

[niksrandomshit]

STFU I FOUND A MECHS LIVE SHOW I HAVE NOT SEEN

got posted 9 months ago. 9 MONTHS

[niksrandomshit]

I love the fanon Helen Distortion design visually, I think all the art is really cool, but I have a very specific idea in mind for her so. Here. Take my Helen headcanon. (Warning, got way too into this and wrote a second person pov encounter with her, including the questioning your perception of reality. Proceed with caution)

I need you to start by picturing a stereotypical early thirties white woman. She looks like she's on the PTA but also probably doesn't actually like kids. She belongs in a commercial about how much your whole family will love this canned vegetable. She probably comes up when you search the word "woman" on google.

You know exactly what she looks like. If you can draw people, you could draw her perfectly from memory. You could describe her to a sketch artist with no issue. If you've only seen her once, that is. Every time you look at her, her features have changed. She still looks like she belongs in that commercial, but her hair is brown now. You swear it was blonde last time you looked. You blink a bit longer than usual. Her nose has changed slightly. You look away. You look back. She's taller. You try again. Her eyebrows are at a different angle, they're fuller. You know she's changing. You know it. That doesn't make any sense, you know exactly what she looked like 10 seconds ago, and she doesn't anymore. Right? You were so certain she was shorter than you just a moment ago, but maybe you just remembered wrong... She still looks like the same person, so her features can't be different, and people don't go from being a couple inches shorter than you to a couple inches taller than you in a matter of seconds. You just remembered wrong, or saw wrong, or something.

She asks you if you're okay, looking concerned. No, upset? No, confused. No, no, definitely concerned. Her eyes are green now. Your head is starting to hurt. Your vision is blurry, but she's still in sharp focus. You try to look away from her again and find your eyes can't focus, can barely tell colors apart. You look back to her. She's wearing different clothes. She's real, right? She has to be. But if she's real, then nothing else can be. But she has to be, everything is blurry and too dull and too bright at the same time. Except her. Her cheekbones are higher now. Nothing is real except her. Or the only thing you can see isn't real. You don't know which is worse. You're stuck there, frozen, head aching and stomach turning, until.

She's gone. Your vision is normal. Only a few seconds have passed, but it felt like far, far longer. Your headache lingers for the rest of the day, and you still know exactly how she looked when you saw her last.

[niksrandomshit]

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

[niksrandomshit]

sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do

[niksrandomshit]

kill them with kindness? no. enjoy sky blue, motherfuckers 🖕☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️

[niksrandomshit]

btw I know ppl on this site go on abt mutuals but if you are someone that shows up in my notes regularly who I don't follow, I do notice and I am fond of you and if you reblog something from me I do think "YES I have pleased the follower with good taste"

[niksrandomshit]

Did you make Needles for the atrocious amount of Michael Shelly stans out there (a group in which I can be counted) or were the similar vibes just a happy little accident?

Neither, really - sometimes you just gotta write a nasty sharp man, then part if your brain goes "the shellyfellas are gonna love this" and another part goes "is that a problem?" and the first part goes "no, just sayin" and then you go make a cup of tea.

[niksrandomshit]

they're being ominous again

[niksrandomshit]

i need everyone to look at the character playlists that the rusty quill voice actors made for their characters right now

disclaimer that these are not "canon" in any way but they ARE by the vas and oh my god ohhhhh my god

[niksrandomshit]

mr. bonzo's VA is uncredited but i'm on my knees praying that it was alexander j newall continuing a longstanding tradition of voicing bass-boosted incomprehensible eldritch abominations

[niksrandomshit]

omg Odd Chap has an electro swing version of it and I LOVE IT.

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!!!!!!!

For some reason the poem Antigonish really scratches my brain, tge first time i heard it was on the podcast The Magnus Archives, and since then i cant stop reading it i really like the poem also i like to rewatch that episode, "Yesterday, upon the stair,

I met a man who wasn't there

He wasn't there again today

I wish, I wish he'd go away...

When I came home last night at three

The man was waiting there for me

But when I looked around the hall

I couldn't see him there at all!

Go away, go away, don't you come back any more!

Go away, go away, and please don't slam the door... (slam!)

Last night I saw upon the stair

A little man who wasn't there

He wasn't there again today

Oh, how I wish he'd go away..."

By Hughes Mearns

[niksrandomshit]

Just finished The Magnus Archives and I loved it so much

[niksrandomshit]

[2778/11080] Crested serpent eagle - Spilornis cheela

Order: Accipitriformes Family: Accipitridae

Photo credit: David Kirsch via Macaulay Library