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In the End, The Choice is Yours

The night was so deep the shadows seemed to bleed darkness. James glanced toward the hidden sky, searching for the moon that would not come. Not tonight. Even the brightest starlight was strangled in the canopy of trees. The temporary blindness was frightening, but it ensured that no one would notice him slipping away.

With each step he took, the silent crackles of the twigs and dried leaves will be heard. Finally, he reached his destination: an old house. As he opens the door and took a step inside the house, the floor rattles.  He was welcomed by a dustless living room. Passing it, he walks toward the stairs.  After reaching the end of the stairs, he took a turn to the right. Closing his eyes, he opened the door of the room located at the end of the hallway.

The darkness of the room welcomed James. Inside the room was his life’s work. Now is the time to test it and be able to obtain the reason why he created this machine. Many people said that he was mad of ever thinking that he can make one. Alas, they are wrong and now he finally made one, his very own time machine.

James started working on the mechanism of the machine and pressed different gears for finishing touches. He desperately wants the thing to work, to be able to go back and change the things that have to be changed. So engrossed with his work, he didn’t notice the shadow that lurks the house. Watching and observing him from a far.

Sleep swallowed him as he works. In his sleep, come the terrible nightmares.

A girl crying and begging.

A woman dead in the arms of his husband.

A boy who looks bewildered, clueless of what’s happening.

A pool of blood.

A cracked glass.

Three lifeless body lying on the floor.

Then, it stops. Now, emptiness filled his dreams, a short break for an antagonizing agony that will come next. Another dream appears the memory that keeps on resurfacing no matter how hard he suppresses.

           He woke up sweating and in an uncomfortable position. He looks at the calendar, then at the machine. “Tonight will be the perfect time for you to function”, he said longingly.

           The night came; the stars are showering the night sky with its twinkling lights. The shadow of the trees engulfs the old house. Inside, James was preparing for his time travel, packing everything that he might need when he arrived in the past. As he packed his things, he saw a family picture, his family picture. He remembers the bittersweet memories that come with it. A tear fell from his eye, but he never bothered to wipe it out. It’s a reminder of everything that he needed to do.

           James seized the old pocket watch and turned the gears to the time that he yearns to go back. The watch starts to turn fast and as it turns, there’s a blinding light that engulf James. Then puff, James is nowhere to be found. The old house is once again empty. However, in the midst of the darkness, there’s someone who witnessed all the things that happen tonight.

           Opening his eyes, a new place welcomed him. A place so familiar to him. Standing up, he feels wobbly, like a fast train that hit him. He can’t stand straight because of the awful headache that he is experiencing. Then a curious looking woman comes to his aid,

“Hello, Mister. Are you alright? You seem to be in a tight situation.”

“I’m alright, I just have a headache. I can still manage”, James said while looking at the ground and steadying his stance.

           The voice seems familiar, it brought back memories. Curious of whom the woman is, he looked up to see. It’s like the heavens are singing right now, happiness field his heart. He finally did it. He is now on the right timeframe. After so many years of trials, he did it.

           The happiness is overwhelming that he started to cry. Then he hugged the woman out of joy. The woman looked bewildered at his reaction and kind of uncomfortable. He didn’t know the man but he looks familiar to her and she feels like she knows him all her life. She just let the man cry on his shoulder.

           “Are you okay now, Mister?” she asked as the man finally stops crying and distanced himself away from her. “I’m sorry, Ma’am. It’s just because you look so similar to the person I know”, he apologized to the lady.

“I’m Jason, by the way. Thank you for your concern”, James introduced himself to the woman while using a fake name, hoping that she will also give her name. “I’m Louisa. Are you a traveler? I haven’t seen you around here before and I know the entire person here in town”, the woman said looking intriguingly at James. James doesn’t know what to say, his mind went blank for a second. He forgot that he is a stranger in this timeframe.

A person with no identity and a nomad.

So he just said yes to Louisa and explained that he is from a town far away from here. “Is there any available place to stay here?” he said inquiring Louisa, hoping that she will let him stay at her house.

           “You can stay in our house. There’s an extra room there that you can use.” The way to Louisa’s house is so familiar to him. The canopy of trees and the bumpy road. There are puddles of water around and the grass are still wet, it seems that rain has just passed by. They arrived at a small two story house. They were welcomed by the noisy squabble of a girl and a boy. A muscular man approached them, who hugged Louisa.

           Their home is so lively. The sound of laughter filled the house. He can smell the delicious soup broiling in the caldron. The smell of the fresh flowers in the vases. The sight of the scenery in the balcony.

           Louisa introduced him to her family. They whole heartedly accept James in their household. The one who hugged Louisa is his husband, Danny, a large muscular man. The girl who is arguing with her little brother is Lisa, a petite and brunette girl. Finally, James, who has a clean, cut hair, tanned skin, and a handsome young man.

The 13 years old version of him.

Seeing him feels nostalgic. It feels like he wants to take the life of the young James but he couldn’t, his time has already passed. The only thing that he can do is change the circumstances and save them. He will save his family. Maybe his present will also change and he will have his family back.

           Night came, the meal was great as he expected. His mother was a great cook. While they were eating, the family members were talking to each other. James was staring at them as they joke with one another, laughing, and telling stories that make up their day. It’s a sight to behold. A memory surfaces, wherein he was the young James, he was the one laughing and telling funny stories. It’s all in his past; it’s here in their present.

           It’s time to retire the night and go to sleep. Louisa approaches him and brought him some blanket, “Here, take these. You can use the room at the end of the hallway.” He took the blanket and thanked Louisa for letting him stay in their house. He entered the room and takes a look at the veranda of the room. The night was so beautiful, the moon filled the sky with its blinding light and the stars are exceptionally brighter tonight. Amidst, this beautiful night will be a terrifying event that changed James life forever.

           In his room, James is laying in the bed staring at the ceiling. Remembering the things that will happen tonight. If memory serves right, there will be a big fire. It’s still painful to reminisce. He remembers it clearly, especially because he will be the cause of the fire and he will be the only survivor in that incident.

           Then, James’ family was soundly sleeping. He, on the other hand, was still wide awake and seems anxious for a reason he don’t know. So, he got up and gets himself a glass of milk but there is no hot water. While boiling, James decided to take a stroll outside and watch the beautiful night sky. The sky was so clear and the blanket of stars envelops it. He can see so many constellations. So engrossed in star gazing, he forgot that he was boiling water.

           After the stroll, he goes back to their house, but alas. The house is on fire, the hot red flower was consuming his house and his family, too.

They are trapped inside.

He tried to go inside and save them, yet the authority won’t allow him. He tried and tried and tried. But the fire is so big now that it’s impossible to go inside.

           Despair consumed his heart. He hates himself for what he has done. He hates himself for being the only one alive. He hates himself that he killed his own family. That day he made a vow, he will do everything to turn back the time and these time he will definitely save them.

           James went downstairs, to see if the young version of him had gone down. There he saw young James pouring water in the kettle.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked as he approached the young James. “Yes, so I’m getting myself a glass of milk. Want some?” young James asked while starting the fire. “No, thank you. Why can’t you sleep? Is there anything bothering you”, he asked even though he already knew the answer.

He is him after all.

“I just feel anxious, today, I can’t explain”, he answered James. The conversation between the two James continue until they become so sleepy and have to retire the night and go to sleep.

           James was ecstatic when he woke up in the morning. He stopped the fire it means that he saves the lives of his family. It also means that they are alive in his timeframe now. He is eager to go back, so he said his farewell to Louisa and her family. He thanked them for their warm welcome. As they part, he saved the picture of his family in his memory and treasured it in his heart.

           He put out his pocket watch and turned the gears to the time where he belongs. It’s another nauseating ride and amass headache. But it’s all worth it; just imagining that his family is in their house alive takes all the pain away.

           When he arrives at his time, a new set of memories bombarded his mind. As the new memories come; he remembers the changes that happen. He starts to cry, “No, no, no. I save them. I change it. So why?! Why are they still not here?!” Then he laughs, he laughed really hard, “It must be a joke. They are alive. My mind is just messing with me.”

           He runs as fast as he could to his old house. When he was near the door, he stopped. It’s true, the memories are true. They are still dead; they never live past that date. He sat on the rung of the stairs, looking forlorn. Staring at the ground as if it has all the answer that he needed; he recalls all the changes that happen.

           He saved them from the fire, but they didn’t die because of the fire. They died because someone else killed them. That’s what his dreams were all about.

The girl that was weeping and begging was Lisa.

The pool of blood.

The lifeless woman in the arms of his husband.

His father being tortured by a group of men.            

He witnessed it all. He saw how they were killed. He saw all the gruesome things that they did to them. They were suffering, while he was hidden in the cabinet where his mother placed him. He saw everything in the fissure of the cabinet. He wants to erase them all.

           He looks up at the dark sky and weep.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have changed anything. I should have just accepted the fact that you are dead. If I didn’t turn back the time, you won’t experience those things”.

The rain starts to pour, but he just stayed there soaking and crying silently. All of the things that he had built have gone astray. He can’t use the time machine now. The young James that he met never builds one, instead he sought after the murderers that killed his family.

           James has no time left in making another time machine. He already consumed his life line and that would be the last time travel that he had done. He already gave his all and sacrificed his own life for changing the past.

           He got up, drench in the rain, and slowly moved into the house. As he walks inside, droplets of water fall in the floor. The last essence of his life is slowly fading away. He walks past every room, remembering all the happy memories that he created with his family. The good and the bad, everything is essential and everything will always remain in his heart and mind.

           As the last essence left, he thought “Maybe I should have just moved on and never gone back to the past. Maybe if I just accepted the truth, everything had gone well. Maybe I have my own family now. But, look what I have done. I made everything worse. I made them suffer more. I should have never fought with destiny. Mom. Dad. Lisa. I’m so sorry.”

James left the world with a heart full of regrets. Regrets can never redeem. Regrets that lick him up in his entire life.

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This Story is Made by Claire Aubrey Altamera, Jackylyn Tibor and Argie Balingbing.