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She isn’t you, she isn’t you, she isn’t you. Will anyone ever come close to how you made me feel?

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I love you more than words can say

Platonically

But deep

Very deep

I feel like I’m already grieving you but I know that you’re still here. You never think these things will happen to you. Cancer came so fast and without warning. We had plans. YOU had plans. But now all we have is time. A small gift that you weren’t taken from us in the dead of night, but it will never be enough. Life is fleeting and everything is meaningless. That’s how I feel. But at the same time, you mean more to me than anyone. So how can that be?

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I’ve never wished so badly for the nights to be longer to put off the next day from beginning.

My heart is breaking and I am so angry but there is no one to blame.

FUCK CANCER

[nonsenseandsuchotherthings]

Sooner or later

You find yourself right where you were, on the corner

Looking for her

You always come back to her…

[nonsenseandsuchotherthings]

I miss my dog

And I miss falling in love

I miss the feeling that you get when someone fits just like a glove

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A part of being an adult is living with regret and not allowing it to consume you. The older you get, the more mistakes you’ve made, opportunities you’ve missed, people you’ve disappointed. And every day you have to remind yourself to be kind and forgiving of yourself. You accept and love the you from the past and understand that it’s all a part of the process. Then you move on and live your best life, knowing now as old as you feel today, you’ll never be this young again.

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403 // 108

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Photo by Clem Onojeghuo 

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“I feel very small. I don’t understand. I have so much courage, fire, energy, for many things, yet I get so hurt, so wounded by small things.”

— Anaïs Nin, Nearer the Moon: The Previously Unpublished Unexpurgated Diary, 1937-1939

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