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just asked my professor if he wants to feature on a song LMFAO

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I love the idea of a roomba topography map being the jumping on point for a liminal horror story. House of Leaves II: Roomba.

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rivalry

something I’ve seen in various fandoms now is young artists will draw flip phones with cracked screens. But in my experience, I have never met someone whose flip phone had a screen crack. Those screens were more like something on a calculator or a nintendo ds than like a smartphone. I was a klutz, and my first phone broke because the front half and back half came apart. Like you’d mayyyyybe see it on some of the later flip phones that only had large screens on the front because smartphones had already made them popular, but it was still way more rare.

If you wanna give a character a flip phone and show they’re clumsy, they’re more likely to have the paint scratched like hell or parts of the plastic chipped off. No more phone charms because the plastic loop broke. If the screen is broken, it would sooner not turn on anymore before the screen would have a crack in it.

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"They're going to bury you three feet deep, because you've only ever been half a man" sounds like a raw ass line from Shakespeare or something buts actually from me yelling at my cat for stealing my sandwich while I was getting a drink.

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LOLOLOL

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new toxic yuri: "20 year old overconsumption tiktok influencer who is one undisclosed sponsorship away from an indictment by the FBI" x "35 year old anti-MLM youtuber mother of three who is cheating on her husband"

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Reddit sucks bc on there you make a comment like this and people downvote it but on here it would have 10 thousand notes

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not sure i get it, but nice post

people are calling my blade made of moonlight that exists only as an illusion bullshit. they say "how can it ignore my shield, as if it wasn't there" and i tell them that it is a blade of illusions. then they ask me "how can a blade of illusions cut through my flesh, that which is surely more real" and i explain that the role of a blade is to cut flesh, and my weapon is most certainly a blade

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butch vampire x femme werewolf 🖤

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me messaging a casual acquaintance: hello, how are you?

me messaging a best friend w/zero lead-in:

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TWO THIRDS BEER AND ONE THIRD CHEESE

OF BRAND VELVEETA OR SUCH OF THESE

WISCONSIN GILGAMESH MAKE YOU SHIT

WISCONSIN GILGAMESH ENOUGH OF IT

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Fun thing about football right now is that there's a move called the "brotherly shove" that the Eagles do when they're very close to scoring, where the whole team puts their hands on the ass of the guy with the ball and physically propels him over the line into the endzone for the touchdown, and all the other teams' fans hate it because it's got such a ridiculously high rate of success for the Eagles and doesn't really seem to work for any other team. People are straight-up calling for this move to be banned, claiming it's "unstoppable" and gives an "unfair advantage" but it really and truly is a skill issue. The whole league hates this move because it only makes the Eagles win more often and nobody else can figure out how to do it right

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Fun thing about football right now is that there's a move called the "brotherly shove" that the Eagles do when they're very close to scoring, where the whole team puts their hands on the ass of the guy with the ball and physically propels him over the line into the endzone for the touchdown, and all the other teams' fans hate it because it's got such a ridiculously high rate of success for the Eagles and doesn't really seem to work for any other team. People are straight-up calling for this move to be banned, claiming it's "unstoppable" and gives an "unfair advantage" but it really and truly is a skill issue. The whole league hates this move because it only makes the Eagles win more often and nobody else can figure out how to do it right

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