not-royal-historian-of-oz-blog - Tumblr blog

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WHEN AMERICAN SYMBOLS ARE GETTING SICK OF AMERICA 

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Never judge anyone by their size.

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HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY “Here’s to the strong women. May we know them, may we be them, may we raise them.” 

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My friend and I couldn't remember your URL earlier (it was two am and w were sleep deprived) so we just called you "Father Target" (like in a respectful way not a bad way) what are your thoughts on this?

Frankly I love it

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Reading about abusive men and the way they think. Very unsettling and an incredible book so far. Here are my very professional notes.

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Boys in big sweaters 💕 Boys in skirts 💕 Boys in dresses💕 Boys in makeup 💕 Boys in wigs 💕 Boys in drag 💕 Boys who are feminine 💕 Boys who like dolls and “girly” toys💕 Boys who like pink💕 💕💕💕Let boys be feminine 💕💕💕

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Some Quotes From my Art History Professor:

“Caravaggio was the BEST renaissance painter, because he knew his shit.  Literally.  Look at this painting, he’s painted shit on everything, even Saint Peter!”

“For those of you fortunate enough to Not grow up catholic, a baptism is where you mist a baby like an orchid to keep it from going to hell.”

“You get Extra Credit for you eerily comprehensive knowledge of Muppets.  Now stop talking.”

“GOD I love flying buttresses.  They’re so melodramatic!”

“I don’t call him “Da Vinci” because that means “From Vinci”.  That’s like calling Steve “Of Greeley” instead of his real name and that’s just rude.  And not just because Greeley is Awful.”

“Michelangelo was really depressed because his job sucked.  Also because he was a bit of a douche, but mostly the job.  He should have been doing literally anything else.”

“Everything can be improved with a Simpson’s reference!”

“Send me Memes, I like having recent content in my lectures.” *Next day* “Stop sending me memes. Please.”

*whilst angrily pointing at a picture of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles* “The Turtles have all their names mixed up for their personalities and frankly that’s embarrassing.  The techie should be Leo, the Flirt should be Raphael, The Boring Leader Dude should be Donatello and the angry one should be Carvaggio because that asshole literally spent his life drunk, fighting people and blackmailing cardinals.  Carvaggio was the BEST.”

“I could have studied in Rome. I could be trying to match boxes of broken dicks to statuary.  Instead of dicks I have you assholes.”

“Warhol was, as you young people say, A Troll.  The art is not the Art, the Outrage is the Art.  Which is kind of a Dick Move, which we old people say too.”

“Remember Kids- mental illness and heavy metal poisoning are not actually substitutes for Talent and Hard Work! Get therapy and don’t drink your paint water!”

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Phantom! At the opera

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Jon Stewart delivers some brutally honest breakup advice to the media on Donald Trump

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Just a warning for those who aren’t aware: the porn bots on here are becoming out of hand, and are now starting to reblog people’s selfies and are actually adding sketchy links along with sexual captions. I think, until this problem is fixed (let’s hope it will be), it’s probably wise you don’t post any selfies if you don’t want your face being on a porn blog, especially if you’re a minor. Take care!

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Tumblr needs more of this….whatever this is.

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horatio: norway wants to march their army through denmark

hamlet: what's that prince's name again?

horatio: fortinbras

hamlet: fourteen bras? that's like

hamlet:

hamlet: twenty-eight titties

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i fucking hate dating nerds one single time i wore a star wars shirt to see a dude and he was like, “wow are u wearing that to impress me” and i said, “star wars episode 4 was seen by approximately 110 million people during its initial theatrical run in 1977”

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I would sell my soul

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So I have a little idea for elsewhere university (forgive the pov switching) ~ Somewhere in the library, there is a legendary book. If you are in the greatest emotional distress you will ever feel in your time at the university (How the book Knows isn’t certain but then again nothing ever really is), you will find yourself slouching into the library and looking along the shelves. Not searching for anything in particular, just something good to read. You pick one, not to thin and not too thick, off of the dusty shelf. The jacket feels slightly soft, like the nose of a stuffed animal once most of the velveteen is rubbed off. You sit down right there in the middle of the aisle, lean your back against a cart, and begin to read. As soon as your finger touches the title page, you feel all of the anxiety pulling out like the tide, a wave of calm rushing over you as you begin to read. Hours go by. People move around you, not even noticing you’re there. Any classes you missed were cancelled that day. Some time later, you’re at the final page. You know that soon you will have to go back to the real world now, and that your break is over. Resigned, you take a deep breath and put the book back on the shelf. You know you will miss it, but there’s nothing you can do, and you’ve heard too many stories of those who would try and abuse the magic here. With a sudden pop, you can hear movement again. You hadn’t even noticed the students walking by you, or the whispering in the next row. You shake your head, fondly caressing the cover one last time. You walk out of the library with a much lighter heart than when you came in, ready to face whatever drove you here in the first place. ~ No student has ever found the book twice, and it’s constantly changing place. What the contents are varies wildly from person to person; from favorite childhood storybooks to long lost books (forgotten underneath a chair or on a picnic table somewhere on campus) to family photo albums that may have never even existed in the first place. It’s rumored that during one of the many book-burning eras that the university has lived through, one of the librarians enchanted the book to promote reading, but no one is really sure. All they know is that it’s nice to have a word of hope in the darkness.

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A very useful demonstration of the importance of sentence length.

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a midsummer night’s meme