notes-and-chronicles

[notes-and-chronicles]

Log #42

Trying to make the most of the last few days ahead of graduation. I have been feeling a whirlwind of emotions, some hard to distinguish from one another. Sadness over the loss of accessibility to my friends, as well as my family with the move ahead of me, excitement for the novel experiences to come, anxiety about the unknown.

Hard conversations have made a hard time harder. As much appreciation I have for discussion of difficult topics, it is the case that they make my heart heavy for days at a time. I am trying to find comfort in myself and my Tawakkul on my Lord through it all!

[notes-and-chronicles]

Log #3

The weather was beautiful today and fall is really coming around. After classes, I blocked out the rest of my day to work on a paper but really struggled developing my thesis. I talked it out with a classmate and printed out some relevant reading that I read before bed. I have a better idea of what I'll write tomorrow inshaAllah. Trying not to stress too much!

[notes-and-chronicles]

Log #41

Coffee and a view. Finals are in full swing and I am so grateful to all of the professors that have moved, cancelled, or made finals optional because of what is happening on our college campuses. So much happening as the year and my undergrad journey comes to a close. Grateful for everything I have but sentimental about the circumstances I am graduating in. Alhamdulillah ❤️‍🩹

[notes-and-chronicles]

April 22, 2024 - Monday

Finally finally was able to go visit the nearby botanical garden ✨I’ve been trying to go since the first day of spring. It was a bit chilly but still so absolutely beautiful! Being in nature is so healing for me I lowkey wish I was in a ghibli film and got sent away to the countryside to improve my health lol. But the city has me in a chokehold only because of convenience but convenience breeds anxiety I'm telling you.

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Maybe you‘re in the middle of what you prayed for

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Update on my existence: Thesis is done! War is over! But I sympathize with this so incredibly much. This thesis was one of the greatest mental academic battles I have had to fight -possibly more on that later? I am so grateful for the opportunity to have gotten to do it and for all the lessons learned. Alhamdulillah!

Writing my thesis I feel like I’m my own parent trying to wrangle their child into doing their homework without yelling at them

like "how about we put on some nice music? does this not help you focus usually?" "look at this video, this person is also stuyding! Let's try to study along with them maybe!" "If I give you a sticker will you please please just sit down and write please"

[notes-and-chronicles]

اللهم اجعلني سبباً للخير لكل نفس أقابلها

Oh Allah, make me become a source of goodness for every soul that I meet.

Ameen

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and rely upon Allāh and sufficient is Allāh as disposer of affairs.

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"this is from the favour of my Lord" [Al Qur'ān- Surah An Naml, aayah 40] — written on a tent in rafah, gaza

[notes-and-chronicles]

Log #40

Study date - with myself! Hoping to get a few good hours of work in ahead of a busy weekend. On the agenda: thesis

Bismillah ❤️

[notes-and-chronicles]

Log # 39

It has been a difficult few weeks. The semester is quite busy, which is not unexpected given that it is my last one, but it is certianly busier than I thought it would be. I am fully booked with my classes, thesis, and applications and I am trying to balance family and social life too. Naturally, what has come last is time for myself. I am out of touch with my mind and body and feel like I am stifly moving from one hour of my day to the next, stressing about how all that I need to do is not fitting in said hours. If I am to survive this semester, this needs to change.

I have been thinking of what I need to reincorporate into my days to keep me grounded. Rather, I have been thinking about what I used to do in my days in times when I was more grounded. The first thing that comes to mind is journaling, of which my page here is a form.

So, here is my first step. Bismillah ❤️

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Al Quran 35:5

It is a reminder for all of us.

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Heartbreaking </3

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[notes-and-chronicles]

Log #

The start of the semester is about a week out and I have more and more items on my to-do list as the break comes to a close. I am working on my research tasks as well as applications for my post-grad plans. As with the start of most semesters, I feel myself very un-grounded and definitely need to take some time to reflect, recalibrate my goals, and reset my intentions.

Planning for a productive weekend inshaAllah ❤️

[notes-and-chronicles]

Log #38

The start of the semester is about a week out and I have more and more items on my to-do list as the break comes to a close. I am working on my research tasks as well as applications for my post-grad plans. As with the start of most semesters, I feel myself very un-grounded and definitely need to take some time to reflect, recalibrate my goals, and reset my intentions.

Planning for a productive weekend inshaAllah ❤️