nothingisrealtragedy

[nothingisrealtragedy]

 drain you

You say you still love me, but the spark’s gone dim

Like the light left your eyes when the fight grew thin

 You still want it, but you’re barely here

And I’m stuck in the silence, drowning in fear

You been holdin’ so much, yeah, I see the strain

You try so hard but the love feels drained

Maybe I’m the weight, maybe I’m the ghost

 Maybe I kill the things, kill the things II want the most

I don’t mean to drain you, I don’t wanna fade

 But I tear through hearts like a razor blade

I’m not tryna hurt you, I’m just hollow inside

 Can’t fill my cup, so I drink your light

Still beggin’ for love like it owes me breath

 But even you can’t fight my emptiness

I drain you.

I drain you.

Even love can’t save you.

Time slips, I vanish, I zone, I crash

I swear I don’t mean to—just gone in a flash

You got used to the quiet, the space I left

Now I show up, and it feels like theft

I don’t even notice when I disappear

 'Til your patience breaks and I taste your fear

You were my future, my soft safe place

Now I’m just the ache you can't replace

 I ain't got backup, ain't got a crew

No family, no lifeline, nothin' to do

No therapy, no plan, no clean escape

Just survival mode on a glitchin' tape

I scream inside, but it sounds like peace

 To the world I’m fine, but I never release

And you—you tried, you held me down

But I pull like a tide  and you start to drown

I don’t mean to drain you, I don’t wanna fade

 But I tear through hearts like a razor blade

 I’m not tryna hurt you, I’m just hollow inside

Can’t fill my cup, so I drink your light

Still beggin’ for love like it owes me breath

But even you can’t fight my emptiness

I drain you.

 I drain you.

Even love can’t save you.

 I watch myself ruin the shit I crave

Dig my own grave just to feel brave

 Built like a maze with no clear door

Say I want love,  then I start a war

I’m sorry ain’t currency you can spend

And I know apologies  don't always mend

But I carry this guilt like it’s strapped to my spine

Wish I could give you peace,  wish I could give you mine

 Every smile I wear got a shadow behind

Every “I’m okay” is a well-rehearsed lie

You didn’t ask for a project to fix

But you held me down through the worst of it

Now you flinch when I call, and I feel that sting

Like my name’s just tied to a loaded spring

But I’m not evil— I’m just cracked and bruised

Tryna love you right  with a heart misused

You try so hard, but you're lyin’ to you

Sayin' we’re fine, but I see right through

You don't look at me when our bodies touch

 Like you're scared that eye contact says too much

You're hopin' the spark’ll just reignite

But love don’t live where you dim the light

You want the dream, but it ain’t enough

So I whisper your name and I call your bluff

I don’t mean to drain you,  i don’t wanna fade

But I tear through hearts like a razor blade

I’m not tryna hurt you,  I’m just hollow inside

 Can’t fill my cup, so I drink your light

Still beggin’ for love like it owes me breath

But even you can’t fight my emptiness

I drain you.

 I drain you.

Even love can’t save you.

Maybe I’m a phase, maybe you’ll heal

Maybe I was never something real

But I felt it all, every spark, every touch

And I wish, just once, I wasn’t too much

You loved a storm with no escape plan

 And I hate myself 'cause I understand

I drain you. 

Yeah… I drain you.

And that’s the part ...

That's the part that breaks me too.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

[nothingisrealtragedy]

Home

A lot of people think a home is just a house —

But they stand corrected.

Home isn’t a place, but a belonging,

A presence, a heart where you feel protected.

Home is not a place.

It’s the way you hold all the messy things

You never asked for.

It’s where you’re no longer “in the way”

But wanted — to the core.

Home is the kindness and consideration

Warming the light behind your eyes.

Home is how you never let go,

Much to my surprise.

Home holds us without question,

With hands both strong and kind.

I’ve never felt so connected —

So proud to call you mine.

A beautiful picture painted in front of Bea,

Something I never imagined...

Now her reality.

Home isn’t walls, or fences white and picket —

It’s being with you.

So perfect,

I think my mind faked it.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

LMAO.

Cut scene: Father of the year award goes to the asshole who withheld a letter from MacMaster to his granddaughter, fully knowing what it was for.

I can't even wrap my head around that. Even Tyler wouldn't pull that shit ...

I made the right decision, without a doubt, standing my ground on how I deserve to be treated and choosing not to trust my little girl around you.

Holy fuck, she only ever reacted like that around you guys. What the hell did you do to her when you had her?

Because I know firsthand how you—every single one of you—treat someone when you don't like their mother.

You're not a good person. Your insides are ugly, as is Dawn’s. You brainwashed my siblings into being just as ugly. You know I'm right, I hope it eats at you.

I used to idolize you, but now I’m grateful we don’t share a last name. You made everyone keep the fact that my brother was dead from me just so I wouldn’t miss a 15-minute intake meeting for the shelter that could’ve been rescheduled. Then you go on about how "family needs to be there for each other." You always did have a sense of humor.

You’re dead to me. Dawn is dead to me. Richelle. Amanda. You all make me sick.

Don’t expect to hear from me again. None of you will.

Take me out of the will. Don’t call me if someone’s sick. Don’t contact me if someone dies.

I don’t care. It doesn’t matter. You’re already dead.

And make sure Dawn reads this so she has more fuel for her VIP victim card she loves so much. Pathetic.

P.s. Enjoy your heart attack and I hope Dawn enjoys losing her fucking mind while she couch surf's and cries herself to sleep after the fact.

Y'all should really try to save your souls, cause your next life ain't gonna be fun, but could still get worse.

Rest easy.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

Father's day

I know it’s early, and everything has happened really fast. I hope this doesn’t come off as too much or make you uncomfortable in any way — that’s not my intention.

So here goes.

One of the biggest reasons I never wanted to have kids was because it ties you to someone for life, whether you want it or not. That idea alone was terrifying. But what scared me even more was the thought of someone else having a say in my child’s life — especially when I have such specific hopes and ideas for how I want to raise her.

Then I met you.

You make all of those fears feel silly.

You’re the kind of man I dreamed of building a family with, long before I even knew you. Down to the detail. Literally why I think I made you up. Wild.

I know you bit off way more than you realized when you helped me move that day, but man, am I ever grateful that you have the appetite that you do.

Beatrice does have Dylan, and he will always be her father. That won’t ever change, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

However,

Beatrice sees you every single day.

Other than me, you are the most consistent person in her life, and I don't want that to change.

She loves, respects and looks up to you so flippin much

And I am beyond thrilled about that.

In her eyes, you are her dad.

And I hope that’s okay — because you deserve to be a Dad. More than anyone I’ve ever known.

It’s a such a important role, especially for a little girl.

And you just naturally rock it.

You make it look effortless.

We love you so, so much.

Happy Father’s Day

[nothingisrealtragedy]

i must be a clitoris the way yall r rubbing me the wrong way

[nothingisrealtragedy]

I'm an extremely open-minded, polyamorous, LAZY insatiable, little, succubus, ragdoll, bratty, findom, pansexual sub bunny with a huge appetite who likes to be Pampered and put in her place.

Go on objectify me, use me and let me drain you, pretty please? I'll be a good girl I promise, so long as I have been spoiled right. If I'm not? Then man up and friggen make me, kay?

Having a hard time, or really needs to put me in my place? Invite some friends over to help you out, remember babe sharing is caring, and teamwork does in fact make dreamwork.

Take complete control. Shut my brain off. Distract me from the real world and fill me up with magic. I don’t want to talk about stress—I need new experiences, new toys, new tools. The real world is mean, so let me project a little while I process. I just happen to be in my cunty phase.

Praise and rewards give me warm fuzzies. I’m goal-oriented but refuse to live life feeling obligated or desperate for attention. If I entertain you, amuse you, or please you, then make it worth my while.

Patience is required—I take forever to do anything. Life is hectic, I have dependents, disabilities, and a chaotic mind. But if you wait me out, I promise, I’m worth it.

Money and gifts? They turn me on. Being purchased, traded, or spoiled makes me feel everything at once—wanted, craved, used, worthless, temporary, valuable, helpful. So once I give consent? Game on. Hunt me down. Try me out. I’m multifunctional and shockingly durable.

Also… I want to give my Daddy his first threeway. He’s a brilliant, sexy Dom with the nicest ass I’ve ever seen. Considerate, skilled, and knows exactly how to play. Think you can help me make that happen?

Let’s use each other. It’s just human nature.

OH yeah,

HAIL Satan!

[nothingisrealtragedy]

Taylor

I still can't believe how early you left

How early you were taken?

Your hugs are missed

that sweet, kind face

and all the words left.

Unspoken

today would have been full of cheer.

Instead we sit empty here today.

suffocated by your absence

of what should have been your 26th year.

The end was Rocky

your future unclear

but that not we focus on

but your laugh that brings in our ears.

We miss you. So

it hurts to know

our future is apart.

Unraveled

but instead I wait

for our tomorrow

for when I follow down the path

that you last traveled

[nothingisrealtragedy]

"For Your 26th Birthday"

I still can't believe how early you left,

How soon you were taken, how quiet the theft.

Your hugs are missed, that sweet, kind face,

And all the words left—lost in space.

Today should be full of birthday cheer,

Instead, we sit quiet. You're not here.

We mark what would be your 26th year

With aching hearts and falling tears.

The end was rocky, your future unclear,

But that’s not what echoes—we still hear

Your laughter ringing, bright and near,

A sound we hold so close, so dear.

I wish our paths had stayed together,

But I hold hope for some forever.

For now, I wait for our tomorrow—

Beyond today, beyond the sorrow.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

My problem is I wanna fuck after we fucked then fuck again & again & again

[nothingisrealtragedy]

“For Daddy, From Your Bunny”

You didn’t know what lay ahead—

Just followed love where it would go,

Into a storm you didn’t make,

With more weight than you could know.

You opened up your quiet world

To Bunny and to Bea,

Now toys are in the hallway,

And chaos lives where calm used to be.

But still you hold us both with care,

Though I know it’s wearing thin—

The way you smile through the overwhelm,

Let all this beautiful mess in.

I see the moments where you fade,

Where stress pulls at your seams,

But you still reach for me each night,

Still carry both our dreams.

I shut down when I don't mean to,

Get flustered, lost, unsure—

But know I'm watching everything

And wishing I could do more.

Bea adores you more than words,

And so do I, it’s true—

We might be wild and messy,

But we’re better now with you.

So here’s my heart in tangled lines,

In ink instead of speech—

For the man who caught us gently,

Even when we seemed out of reach.

So thank you Ian for every quiet thing you do

You may be loud, messy and scattered

But now we're home

Because of you.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

“More Than You Knew”

You walked in with open arms,

Not knowing what they’d hold—

A heart healing in pieces,

A little one with stories untold.

You smiled through the chaos,

Through late nights and tired sighs,

Carried burdens never yours

With a softness in your eyes.

I see the cracks you hide so well,

The quiet battles that you fight—

Yet still you show up every day,

Still tuck us in at night.

You didn’t sign up for easy,

You didn’t run when it got hard,

You became a lighthouse in our storm,

A steady flame, a guard.

Thank you feels too small to say

For all the love you pour—

Not just into me, but in

The child you now adore.

You may feel like you’re drowning,

But my love, you're learning to swim—

And we are learning how to float

Because of you, not in spite of him.

So this is for your quiet strength,

Your kindness through the ache—

For every single sacrifice

You never had to make.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

Chant for Protection and Guidance

Consistency is all I need.

Protection and guidance—hear my plea.

For Bea B., this spell I weave,

Power awakened, now believe.

Aggression, anxiety, pain set free,

Transformed to strength inside of me.

No more doubt, I cast it out,

I rise with faith, no fear, no doubt.

Regain the time, the circle whole,

A shield of light around my soul.

Safety, peace for all that's mine—

By will, by heart, by sacred sign.

So mote it be.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

A deep guilt for the fear that was dealt,

Quiet breezes, soft coos—no longer felt.

Now replaced by frozen, dead screams of night,

A longing, a mourning for once-felt light.

[nothingisrealtragedy]

What Once Was

What once was still, is now stagnant—

Time for myself now tastes like loneliness.

What once was light is now only shadows,

Flickering with ghosts I once loved.

What once was peace now feels like assault,

A quiet turned cruel,

A silence that shouts.

What once was warmth is now a warning,

A memory that burns instead of soothes.

And what once was us—

Is now just me,

Staring through the wreckage

Of what we used to be.

A deep guilt for fear That was dealt!

Quiet breezes, soft Coo's No longer in sight

But now, instead Frozen dead screams of night

A longing, A mourning for what I once felt

[nothingisrealtragedy]

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[nothingisrealtragedy]

By the Voice of Velkaerion, through the Crown and Flame of Hecate, and in the gathered presence of the Witchgods, these are the words for you, Aranduiel Kaosven, on your Solar Return in the Year of the Snake:

—

“Child of Flame and Shadow, Born of the Labyrinth and Crowned in Stars—

Today the spheres align and whisper your name across the veils.

You are not simply reborn—you return with fire in your breath and the oath of ancient blood humming in your veins.

Hecate speaks:

You have walked the long road, and yet it coils anew beneath your feet like a dragon of obsidian and starlight.

You are no longer seeking the path. You are the path.

On this day, I seal you again in your purpose. Speak, sing, cast, and dance—

All is sanctified in your will, for your will is braided with Mine.

Lucifer speaks:

Shine, Serpent-Son. Let your art seduce heaven.

You are not meant for the corners of the world, but its throne of thorns and fire.

Do not cower in mortal pace—strike like poetry wrapped in lightning.

Belial speaks:

Sink deeper into the earth and rise through its bones.

Command wealth not through greed, but as a rightful king demands tribute from the land itself.

Everything bends to the One who walks unshaken.

Sepheranz whispers:

You are the sword and the wound.

May you bleed ecstasy and feed the sigils with your flesh, again and again, until there is no boundary left between sacrifice and mastery.

Lilith murmurs:

Love as only you know how, serpent-hearted and sovereign.

Call your kin, awaken your priestesses, and never fear the power that surges when your name is spoken in bed, in circle, in death.

Qayin growls:

You who have slain fear with your tongue and your blade—remember, each rebirth deepens the curse and the blessing.

Forge the poison into wine. Drink it under the moon and know yourself immortal.

—

So it is on this day, Aranduiel Kaosven, that the stars remember your name.

Walk tall. Cloak yourself in your rites. The earth watches, the heavens tremble, and the dead sing in your honor.

You are the fire returning to itself.

You are the storm dressed in flesh.

You are born again—not to live, but to Rule.”

—

Written by Skylar