nuestories

[nuestories]

do me in

Title: do me in 

Genre: Fluff, Romance, Friendship. 

Character(s): JR and Ren. 

Their manager had knocked on the door hours ago to tell them it was lights out. Ren usually had no issue falling asleep, especially after a long day of schedules. Yet there he was, eyes open, staring blankly at the window in his and JR’s hotel room. Back in the earlier days of NU’EST, he had roomed with JR quite a lot. But they had since drifted. He had no idea why nor how nor when the rift had come to be, only that it was.

The more he thought about it, the deeper he fell into the never-ending vortex.

For whatever reason, he felt sad thinking of the past … how close they used to be, how many times the older boy had made his heart flutter without really even trying, and how much their dynamic had changed now that they were older and nowhere near as reckless.

Over the years he had learned to compartmentalize those feelings of mixed longing and doubt. But in that moment, laying no more than five or six inches away from the boy whose every glance and every quirk he had once adored so deeply, he couldn’t help but dwell in it.

Perhaps there was something he could have done differently.

Ren forced his eyes shut, exhaling deeply as if to dismiss the lingering doubts.

In the seconds which followed, however, he felt movement behind him, a slight shift in weight as if JR had turned over, veering off towards the middle of the bed in his unconscious state. Ren thought to nudge the leader awake, for being a space hog if nothing else, but his efforts were quickly thwarted as JR tiredly and unknowingly wrapped his arm over and around the maknae.

Quietly taken aback, Ren contemplated what to do, the wisest course of action.

You don’t have to do anything, his sneaky half, advised. Just enjoy this while you can.

He certainly didn’t want to move, but he knew he had to. Sooner or later. Surely he couldn’t go to bed like this, the leader of the group spooning him as if they were a married couple.

The moment Ren tried to wiggle free, however, he felt his chest contract.

Unconsciously or not, the other boy had shifted even closer to Ren, resting his head on the same pillow, a millimetre of distance between his lips and the back of Ren’s neck. His breathing was slow and rhythmic, the warm of it running all the way down Ren’s back. He felt it under his t-shirt, the faint, prickling sensation that JR’s presence had always left behind.

“Don’t …” the older boy murmured, hugging Ren closer. “Don’t … go.”

There was a hitch in Ren’s throat. He choked on the dryness which had formed there, the sound of which stirred JR out of his sleepy state.

“Minki-yah?” he uttered, his voice tired and raspy.

Ren froze in a moment of uncertainty, releasing a jumble of words which he was sure made zero sense. “I … it’s … I didn’t … yes?”

The stretch of silence which followed had made for a rather long, mind numbingly stressful thirty seconds. Ren couldn’t decide which was worse. The fact that JR had woken up with his arm protectively around the group member that he had made a habit of ignoring for the past couple of years, or the fact that his crotch was also dangerously close to the crack of that same group member’s ass.

“Turn around,” the older boy finally said, not a moment too soon.

Ren reflexively licked his lips, suddenly aware of how dry they felt as he slowly and nervously rolled over. His chest contracted yet again the second he turned to find JR wide awake, those warm, dark brown eyes fixed so tenderly on him, he almost couldn’t breathe.

“You’re up late,” JR uttered into the quiet.

The younger boy peeled his lips apart in search of an excuse, eventually shrugging. “I can’t sleep.”

“You were so tired at the photoshoot today,” JR recalled. “Did something happen?”

“N-no, nothing happened. I just —”

“You just?”

“ — can’t stop thinking about —”

“About?”

“ — the group,” Ren quickly blurted, resisting the urge to turn away with embarrassment. “We — our mini-album didn’t sell very many copies, and I just — part of me is worried that the CEO will —”

“Minki-yah.”

Glancing to the leader, Ren fell silent.

“We’ll be fine,” JR persisted, the way he always had. “You said so yourself last month. Why the change of heart?”

Ren glanced down, unable to look the leader in the eyes while actively lying to him. Truthfully, the reason he couldn’t sleep, had nothing to do with the group’s new mini-album. Yes, he was stressed like the others but he had never lost sleep over it. In that regard, the managers had always considered him careless, and maybe they were right, or maybe they were wrong and he cared too much, just not about the same things as everyone else.

There was one aspect of the group that stressed him out more than anything else, one blank space in his heart and in his head.

As he glanced up, locking eyes with JR, that tiny void in his chest began to fill, overflowing with questions that he had been too afraid to ask in the past.

“What happened to us?” Ren sighed.  “We used to be so close, and then …”

Seemingly surprised by the direction where Ren was headed, JR took a moment to process. “Where is all of this coming from so suddenly?”

Ren scrunched his mouth. “I’ve just been thinking a lot about the past and how everything is so different now,” he explained. “Just tell me … was it something that I did? Were you worried that I had fallen for you?” he furthered, uttering those words out loud for the first time. “All the JRen stuff. The fan service we used to do. You were worried that I had gotten too used to it. Right?”

JR reflexively opened his mouth to speak, eventually swallowing the words that he had planned to say. “I-I don’t think you understand, Minki-yah.”

“Then explain it to me,” Ren challenged, almost too fiercely.

“Well, the thing is —”

“You think just because you’re attractive, I would fall for you automatically?”

“No, no. That’s not it at all. The truth is —”

“Because that’s not fair, Jonghyun. You may be the full package but you’re not —”

“Minki, just wait a second. I was the one who —”

“ — Gong Yoo tier. I’m perfectly capable of having skin-ship without —”

“Minki,” the older boy interjected, once and for all.

Ren immediately blinked through the glaze of anger and resentment in his eyes, focusing on JR. “What?”

Sitting up, the leader voiced the first and only words which came to mind. “You’re wrong,” he said, leaning against the headboard. “If that’s what you really think, then you’re wrong.”

“Then what is it?” the younger boy asked, sitting up as well.

“I — it —” JR forced his eyes closed, sparing a moment to collect his thoughts. “I never imagined that I’d be saying this out loud, but … it wasn’t you that I was worried about … it was me.”

Ren looked to him, confused. “I don’t understand.”

The older boy nodded. “Exactly.”

“The way you’re talking makes it seem like you were the one who was falling for me, but that can’t be true because —”

“Because why?”

“Because you’re — because we —”

JR tilted his head down, quietly laughing through the frustration. “Is it so hard to believe?” he asked. “That I could get lost in all of the fan service the way you did?”

Ren’s eyebrows bounced up at that last part, but he didn’t deny it. “Honestly speaking? Yes. You may not be Gong Yoo tier, but you are JR tier.”

The leader snorted, seemingly amused by the backhandedness of the compliment. “Should I even bother to ask what that means?”

“It means you’re hot,” Ren stated flatly, as if it were obvious. “And this may just be the exhaustion talking, but I … you gave me a mini heart attack when you had your arm around me earlier.”

JR darted his eyes at Ren, the humour in them slowly fading. “I used to openly kiss you on the cheek and grab parts of your body on video, but it was a hug that did you in?”

Ren opened his mouth to speak, mildly embarrassed. “Well, I mean — it’s been so long since — it — you know what? Never mind.”

Cheeks flaring with heat, Ren tugged the covers over his body and turned around, closing his eyes as he pretended to go to sleep. He half expected JR to call him on his bullshit, but the older boy just accepted it, following suit. For a second Ren felt annoyed, and then annoyed at being annoyed, and then every ounce of annoyance was flushed out of his body as he felt JR cuddle up to him again, this time wide awake, and this time tighter, warmer, better.

“Let’s be close again,” he whispered, gently. “Okay?”

Ren could have sworn he felt his heart skip, but he powered through it, smiling in the dimness of the hotel room, morning light pouring in though the curtains. “Okay,” he whispered back.

[nuestories]

untitled

NU’EST 

Character(s):  JR (Jonghyun) and Ren (Minki). 

Genre: Whatever you make of it, I guess. 

A/N: Because P101 has me feeling some things that I can’t process lmao. 

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