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Martin Septim: Should the battle go ill, I brought my stash of Argonian… “romance” novels with me. Do not show them to Jauffre, and burn them unless you intend to keep them.

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Your Productivity is being drained

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Perception Check Failed.

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Imperials will eat anything if it’s drowned in enough butter.

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Your Productivity is being drained. (Though time would eventually show that this was not true for everyone. Should have made this a "bonus" post and not one of the main ones. Lesson learned. This was for Starfield, which was about to launch.)

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Goblins cannot swallow large pies whole without dying. You can take advantage of this for a good laugh.

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Trying to buy swimsuits for skeletons is, more often than not, a fool’s errand. But that has never stopped necromancers from trying.

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Martin Septim: Should the battle go ill, I brought my stash of Argonian… “romance” novels with me. Do not show them to Jauffre, and burn them unless you intend to keep them.

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You cannot train your Blade skill by being edgy. But doing so will make you susceptible to fire and blunt damage.

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He died as he lived. (Oblivion Remastered Edition)

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Grandpa didn't get his beans today. (With the correct font this time)

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Your employee performance review is going poorly.

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He died as he lived. (Oblivion Remastered Edition)

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Grandpa didn't get his beans today. (With the correct font this time)

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Your employee performance review is going poorly.

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Vampires can sometimes subsist off of pork grease, but it usually makes people uncomfortable to witness one of them draining a sausage.

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“Milking a skeleton” is necromancer slang for making soup broth with the bones of Skeleton Champions.