okaycoolsure - Tumblr blog

[okaycoolsure]

I feel so foolish I wasn't ever as understanding as I should have been. I'm the problem and life is better without me. So much more freedom, experience and opportunity. It was a true privilege to have you let me be a part of your life.

I want so much to be happy for you to be feeling more independent and fufilled. I'm so depressed and confused as to why you ignore me when I had always been there for you through all of your hard times. While I'm going through, what feels like one of the harshest periods in my entire lifetime.

It's the hardest thing to have someone be the love of your life, soulmate, dream girlfriend to just leave you like nothing had even happen between us and its so hard to even imagine and try to live like that. I know I'll get over it eventually but my feelings are so hurt beyond reason, and I've been trying my absolute best to forget about it all but all the pictures in my phone are of you looking so happy. If I deleted them all I wouldn't be able to look at all the good times and the reason my life had been so enjoyable. I can't go to the same places you go now, I just get fucked up in strange places and try to pretend I'm doing well in the morning after I've been out all alone. I miss my partner in crime, I miss Lyds, I miss being there for you. I just miss you. You might never see this but I'll always love you. You were the greatest person I've ever spent so much of my time with, I'll never forget your antics, beauty, kindess and understanding. Thank you so much I'm sorry

[okaycoolsure]

I don't want to be sad

BUT that's what's gotta happen! That's how life goes! That's how it will always be.

Things will be okay. Maybe I need to go run away into the woods and be a primitive being and shed my skin! Getting heartbroken sucks and missing love hurts

Maybe I just need to stay so busy that I can't think about anything except for what I'm doing that very moment but I feel like that is just going to make me a rushed person more than I already am and I'll have a heart attack from stressing myself out and I'll die that way

I don't know what makes me happy now. I like hiking, kayaking and I'm trying to learn to enjoy exercising like running and stuff ( tried it and gave up after just walking to the track). I'm so stuck in all the bad things that can happen and it's okay to have those anxietys and it's okay to worry but I don't want that all the time or at all really

I just need to vent it out I feel stupid and hypocritical that I'm doing this but it's okay because no one is even on here anymore. I wish I could just go to work when I wanted to so I could sleep better

[okaycoolsure]

PICTURE THIS

*explosions everywhere* *A train running right off the side of a cliff* *someone under covers in bed sitting straight up after having a bad dream* *accidentally stepping ankle deep in an ant pile* Trying to break out of a car while is submerged in water and not feeling like you have enough breath to survive^ This is how I feel

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

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[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

Life ain't fair and the world is mean

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]

[okaycoolsure]