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not one brain cell between the two of them 😔

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to me, correctly using 5+ commas in a single sentence is like perfectly executing a combo in a fighting game. to me.

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played it for the horse yuri + trainer design OC

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this is the only time google's stupid ai has ever made my life better in any capacity

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heartbreaking! a pretty solid standalone horror story has gotten a continuation that recontextualizes all of its self-contained events as part of a massive & banal "epic" mythos

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what it feels like asking anyone 1+ years younger than me if they wanna hang out

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This is killing me rn 😭😭😭

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you ever see this flick?

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With the announcement of the Copper Golem being added to Minecraft after all, I am once again petitioning all games calling various robots and created lifeforms "golems" to Stop Doing That and rename them "Constructs" instead

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C'est un boing-boing incroyableoux

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ground control to crazy frog

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it is Cookie Clicker's 12TH BIRTHDAY today and as has become tradition i am BAKING COOKIES

this year's theme is unpreparedness. i did Not find the vanilla extract. as a result i've decided to simmer in milk a vanilla bean we had lying around instead (i'm at Opti's house for this. his kitchen is substantially more established) (the other option was infusing the vanilla in vodka for months and i simply do not have that kind of time)

smells so Flippin good

anyway! baking:

some previous years for chocolate chips i tried faffing around with popping bars in a blender which turned out awful and gunky. this time (we're doing classic dark/milk/white) i am simply chopping them with a little knife for lovely results. what was i thinking honestly

i want you

continuing with our unpreparedness theme the kitchen scale was nowhere to be found so i am entirely eyeballing the 30g each lump of dough is supposed to be. not that a little unevenness matters but inequality no matter how small is how man tears at the throat of man

test batch! these turned out thinner and less photogenic than previous years; i was worried the milk may have upset the ingredient balance but i think i just need to chill the dough longer so that's staying in the fridge overnight and i'll be pumping out giant plates of (hopefully nicer-looking) cookies tomorrow. on the plus side these cooled down really fast and also they were delicious. the vanilla milk gambit really worked out i'm very pleased

these guys helped:

thank you for playing Cookie Clicker these 12 years! here's to another 12,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000

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Unused

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Today round ass puppy revealed to me, exhausted, at the end of my rope, that her training wasn't working not because she didn't understand, she did, she did, but instead because treats, chicken, turkey and pork apparently weren't enough motivation. She began obeying every word with startling accuracy as soon as she was offered something else. Doing backflips and stunts with pyrotechnics as prompted for the promise of a pea. A pea. She's a dog. A pea. A pea. A pea. I have to carry peas around now. On my person. Personal peas. 🫛 peas

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tumblr is a pretty tolerable place when you have thousands of people blocked and hundreds of content filters active at all times

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I WILL ALSO JOIN

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Losing my mind at this van that's formatted like a fucking meme