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No matter what happens in my life I cannot kill myself cuz there are deltarune chapters to enjoy in the future. Amen

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The Cactus Saga

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bc of the alcohol scene people are FINALLY clocking that Toriel is also kinda shitty. for people who didn't pick up on it this is not new to Deltarune:

Toriel is incredibly stubborn especially about her beliefs and therefore she states very blatently that she is good and Asgore is bad and evil and horrible, meanwhile Asgore himself is a pushover and takes it like a pussy. Because she states it with such confidence people just kinda.. believed her.

Toriel's the one who left and decided to stew instead of actually solving any problems. it took six kids for Toriel to actually try to hold one back. When she comes back like. yeah a lot of this is Asgore's fault but what she says to him then could've been said six dead kids ago instead of basically ghosting him. Even after all of her worry she still doesn't come with you because despite herself and what she thinks, she's just as much of a coward delaying the inevitable as Asgore is.

These themes really continue in Deltarune. While Asgore is definitely too pushy, Toriel refuses to talk to him in any way at all, throwing away his flowers and trash talking him behind his back while also not talking to him at all. Similarly to Undertale she'd much rather avoid and trash talk him than make moves to fix anything.

Even though Toriel kinda does, it's not an argument of who was worse in the situation of either Undertale or Deltarune, if you start counting "sin points" to decide who was worse than you're loosing your media literacy. As far as I can tell at least in Undertale Toriel is just as at fault as Asgore is, even IF she tried and failed years ago and gave up, shutting herself off from the world and pretending it doesn't exist is no solution, and it's almost the same solution Asgore took, even right before he kills you.

We don't know the situation in Delatrune other than Asgore seems to have something he's involved with that Toriel doesn't want to talk about that Carol is "financing", very well could be an addiction of his own.

But I think the blatant alcoholism (that's in Undertale btw, in the alarm clock event she also got plastered) that people who know what alcoholism looks like noticed how Kris (and Susie) act in that scene has made it more apparent than ever that Toriel is an incredibly flawed character and one of her flaws is not being able to see that, something that Asgore does the opposite of where he's always wallowing in self-pity.

Toriel is really good at general mom-isms like making breakfast, taking the kids out, supporting interests, giving hugs, etc. However when actually worrying about Kris' safety and wellbeing she ends up falling short, as people have pointed out when we come home in chapter 4 she doesn't ask why either of them were out so late. Even a controlled state Kris has enough embarrassment and shame about the scene that they hide their face, meaning Kris has shown obvious signs of disapproval before that Toriel has not seen or ignored.

I think that's why her and Sans mesh so well together in an actually horrible way. Sans also likes to pretend stuff doesn't exist and brush stuff off with a joke instead of doing anything until literally the last minute. With how he acts in the scene he may not know, but weather he knows or not he is absolutely enabling her, which weather Toriel knows it or not is why she likes him and keeps him around. Finally a succinct way of saying why I believe their relationship, whatever you believe it is, is a toxic one.

TLDR: the only parent doing a good job here is Rudy unless we learn info later that changes that

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I wonder if Kris purposefully "emptied" their room, just so that the SOUL wouldn't find out about the things they care about. Just to prevent us being too aware of their life, of their likes, so they couldn't be used against them.

Like. We didn't even know that Kris liked playing piano and was GOOD at it, until we asked around town and confirmed it in their room in cyberworld. Because when we DID find out we started forcing them to play the piano, and they kept refusing. We knew about pianos, so Kris started thinking about them, in Ch4 we had a CHOICE to make Kris say "I'll never play piano again" and, depending on the route, they try to stop us from saying it.

It's so dangerous to let a being like us know about Kris themself - we'll weaponize it against them immediately - oh, Kris likes someone? We'll talk to them immediately. Oh, Noelle and Kris were close once? Well...

Being known is being vulnerable. And by learning more about Kris we learn more about the ways we can make them miserable - intentionally or not.

And this is something that Kris and Carol share - Carol keeps everything important at her home, where nothing can harm it, can harm HER. She controls everything, just so she can't be made vulnerable and suffer because of it. But Kris? Kris doesn't have a luxury of privacy. The demon is inside of them, so they have to build a facade of emptiness, just so they can function long enough for The Plan (tm) to work.

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The cactus that lived upstairs loves you

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+Bonus

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They have consumed me lately. Some thoughts and things under the cut.

Mettaton in Deltarune is a much more depressed and repressed version of himself, compared to how he was in Undertale. Talking about how much of a nobody he is, and never seeing him come out of his house... However, giving Tenna to him to brighten his mood I think is genuinely doing wonders for him. Tenna I think is what's responsible for MTT truly finding his passion in the art of show business, as well as cracking his egg along the way, and gets him to start coming out of his shell more, or at least trying to.

Some miscellaneous thoughts here:

Tenna, unable to really communicate the normal way (y'know, talking), he instead opts to sentence mix whatever TV programs or movies MTT is watching. Chopping up bits and pieces of dialogue to form as coherent of sentences as he can muster. MTT is both surprised and very intrigued when his television suddenly starts stuttering and continuously rewinding the phrase 'What's your name?' from one of the characters in his show.

It's Tenna's idea for the most part to get MTT to try again with the whole 'making a body' thing. Seeing as how the NEO body in the Cyber World was a scrapped design MTT had for himself, him and Tenna start a little smaller and more reasonable, leading to the classic box design as opposed to his EX form. Now, neither of them know how to build a robot, but.. it's a better start than before.

Tenna is MTT's personal hype man. Sometimes leaving the house to go get groceries is extremely difficult, but he's always there for him to make the job feel easier. DR!MTT is effectively a hikikomori for the looks of it, so having somebody so bright and positive like Tenna in his life now is bound to have an impact on him.

This impacts Tenna too, of course: having somebody so captivated by him again is doing wonders. MTT could not appreciate Tenna's new presence in his life more. They are dependent on each other, but healthily.

MTT also is probably able to possess the television like any other object, but I wonder how it plays out with Tenna's consciousness in there, too...

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My favourite theory for now is that in the end of the Deltarune Susie will become a writer, like Gerson.

Like, thats such an unexpected thing to do for someone like *her* and that's the point! Your interests and personality cannot dictate what you can or cannot do. Others think that she is "not the type to play the piano", because she's violent and drums suit her more. She doesn't seem like a person who would do healing, more like a person who fights, who destroys.

And it's so easy to fall prisoner to the other peoples perceptions and expectations for you, especially when you're a teen, who's been isolated and prevented from building strong connections with anyone.

And when Susie did finally developed a friendship, she started... changing. She started wondering that maybe... she's capable of more, than she thinks.

As we saw with the healing spell, Susie got better with enough practice. And she started from healing 2 HP that cost 100%TP! That's insane progress!

And in the chapter 4 we saw her actually practicing writing a letter. It's got many grammatical mistakes, some of the message was missed but. It's a beginning.

Maybe, just maybe, Susie can not only rewrite her own destiny, but write something wonderful, something new, something unapologetically hers.

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That's his shirt

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Was I a man dreaming I'm a butterfly; or am I now a butterfly dreaming that I am a man?

weird route bonus

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toby when i get you toby

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their shallow observations will only stall the transformation

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The real thing with ADHD is not "I forgot", but that forgetting is this ongoing process. I remembered! And then I forgot.

At ten this (hypothetical) morning I remembered that I have a meeting at six. And then from 11 through 3 I worked on other stuff and had zero thoughts about that meeting. Maybe even thought about what I was gonna do with my evening at home. Got attached to the idea of taking the time to make a good dinner, maybe play some video games.

And then at three I said, "Oh! Fuck!" and remembered again, hopefully long enough to set an alarm. And then I went to the bathroom and remembered that I need to clean the counter and spent twenty minutes cleaning the bathroom and went to get a snack and then at five I said, "OH! FUCK!" and had to scramble to dress like a real adult and get out the door.

It isn't one clean forgetting. It's a constant process of forgetting and then, with an exhausting adrenaline spike, remembering. And then forgetting. Baby, I can forget the same thing more times in a day than you ever forgot your parents' anniversary.