MCU, ASOUE, Castle, music, B99 • name redacted • she/her • USA • dianetti, bitches • her name is Melinda May and she means everything to me
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laura’s ten year celebration ✵ @sunshineandsciencebabies asked for 🎁 + fitzsimmons (quote from one tree hill)
#fitzsimmons#leo fitz#jemma simmons#ALYA FITZ#sorry for the all caps but i just love writing that#agents of shield
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a playlist i made that’s basically what i listen to while writing my ASOUE fic
it’s a little oldschool but that’s more my scene than modern music
you can find the playlist right here!! sorry it’s a youtube one
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when i say “dashing and heroic” you say “jacques snicket”
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Endgame.
#they finally got their happy ending-#💗💞💞💖💘💓💝💕#daniel sousa#daisy johnson#endgame!!!!!!#daisysousa#agents of shield
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“I’ll stay.”
↳ Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. | 07x13 — What We’re Fighting For
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this is how she looks in his mind and they’re not married? illegal
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every episode of criminal minds
lady: walking down dark alley slowly and alone (everything a woman would never do)
white guy in hoodie: hey
lady: AHH
white guy in hoodie: u look like my mom *stabs her* *takes her toes*
—
emily: and then i got drunk and slammed that bitch’s head into the bar counter
derek: haha thats great-
jj: its a bad one *hands out files*
emily: let me eat you out
(in the conference room)
jj: so yeah this guy stabs ladies. but now, he takes their toes
spencer: hes escalating
hotch: 😡😡😡 wheels up in 30
(zoom in on the plane)
jj: if when you do, but i cannot for the yes of he was what i no 💖 -lil huddy
(in the plane)
emily: sexual sadist
spencer: the history of toes is actually a long starting with the ancient indians they used to-
derek: dont make me put ur head through the plane window pretty boy. although i know you would love that
spencer: 😳😑
garcia on the phone: okay so i made a list of all the white guys in arizona.
derek: i want to taste ur guts
garcia: impale me with ur cock
hotch: thanks garcia 😡😡😡
—
detective alzhiemers: we spoke on the phone and i invited u here but i just want u to know i dont trust a single fucking thing you say. wow agent jareau u got that barbie doll build.
hotch: 😡 where can we set up
(at the crime scene)
rossi: 👁👄👁 he took their toes. but u can see the bone here.
(camera zooms in on derek)
derek: *takes off his sunglasses* *flexes* hes devolving
(at the m.e)
doctor dr. : so basically he kills them. u can see because theyre dead. he takes their toes but its sloppy.
emily: he must be doing it because he doesnt have any toes.
reid: *calling garcia* we need a list
(music escalates)
—
spencer: yeah so basically hes white and a sexual sadist
hotch: mid 30s, his mother didnt love him
emily: HES IMPOTENT because his girlfriend cut off his balls
derek: and he does not have toes. we gotta catch him fast. *picks up a call from garcia*
jj: i will be telling the press so we can get calls about men without toes.
garcia: hey my 12 inch bad dragon dick. i found him- Ben Serialkiller, 54 creep lane. born without toes, his mom kicked him out when he was 5.
derek: thanks babygirl. remind me to kiss ur feet tonight.
rossi: god am i old enough to die
detective alzheimers: actually i think youre completely wrong.
emily: we dont fucking care shut up limpdick
other cops: okay we believe you now
—
(in a dark basement)
spencer: Ben, i get it. u dont have to kill these women. *puts the gun down and takes off kevlar for no fucking reason* my mom tried to kill me too. but im not a serial killer.
white guy in hoodie: you dont get it.
rossi: you dont want to kill her. we can let the world know of your struggle, ben. we will teach them of a world with men without toes.
white guy in hoodie: okay i guess. *lets go of lady* *cries*
hotch: 😡😡😡 *cuffs him*
—
morgan, on the jet: u did good today, kid.
reid: thanks. i wonder what my life would be like if i didnt have 3 lifetimes of trauma on my 27 year old back.
morgan: hahaha
emily, joining in: hahahaha. loser
hotch: 😡😡😡 i wish i had emotions
jj: i miss my kids
emily: can we fuck yet
jj: fine i guess
(picture of the sky)
rossi: And in the end, if I eated soap, no I didnt because I yes ✨ -hitler
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for everyone saying bbg's hair is too blonde....


💁
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#when you both share loss of memory/experiences
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can we just fucking. talk about May calling it the “Coulson talk”?? and then Coulson saying she gets to give the talk now??
those bitches finally admitted their plan all along was to adopt everyone by any means necessary and i love them for that
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Coulson bot figuring out Sybil's codes
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Bringing up Bahrain just to hurt her? Cool cool cool
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it’s either Jemma’s pregnant or Fitz is pulling a Coulson
"Is this about the blood work?"
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Iain De Caestecker as Agent Leo Fitz Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 7x11 “Brand New Day”
#i swear to fucking god if he’s already dead-#that would be. unforgivable#agents of shield#leo fitz#aos spoilers
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No one:
Sousa: Quake? quake? QuAkE?
Mack and Sousa: *giggling*
#finally the wholesome content we deserve#agents of shield#alphonso mackenzie#daniel sousa#aos spoilers
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