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my dad–also a writer–came to visit, and i mentioned that the best thing to come out of the layoff is that i’m writing again. he asked what i was writing about, and i said what i always do: “oh, just fanfic,” which is code for “let’s not look at this too deeply because i’m basically just making action figures kiss in text form” and “this awkward follow-up question is exactly why i don’t call myself a writer in public.”

he said, “you have to stop doing that.”

“i know, i know,” because it’s even more embarrassing to be embarrassed about writing fanfic, considering how many posts i’ve reblogged in its defense.

but i misunderstood his original question: “fanfic is just the genre. i asked what you’re writing about.” 

i did the conversational equivalent of a spinning wheel cursor for at least a minute. i started peeling back the setting and the characters, the fic challenge and the specific episode the story jumps off from, and it was one of those slow-dawning light bulb moments. “i’m writing about loneliness, and who we are in the absence of purpose.”

as, i imagine, are a lot of people right now, who probably also don’t realize they’re writing an existential diary in the guise of getting television characters to fuck. 

“that’s what you’re writing. the rest is just how you get there, and how you get it out into the world. was richard iii really about richard the third? would shakespeare have gotten as many people to see it if it wasn’t a story they knew?”

so, my friends: what are you writing about?

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“I feel like we moved on too fast from-“ yeah we did bc they keep shooting absolutely insane things at us. List of things we moved on too fast from bc the damn things to move on from just keep coming:

- the will

- you two have an adorable son

- buck taking care of Chris during the shooting when Eddie literally had a girlfriend

- Eddie quite literally panicking at the idea of said girlfriend being his wife

- Buck’s bf canonically saying buck might love Eddie

- Bucks SISTER canonically saying buck might love Eddie

- buck and Eddie not being able to look away from each other in 818

- I’m not your last

- The will

- that breakup being heavily implied to have been about Eddie

- just the well and lightning strike. In general

- the poker date??

- “I feel like she sees me” “😒😠”

- can’t you both be good cops?? Noooo

- Buck hooking up with his ex in Eddie’s house bc he missed Eddie and saying out loud he was doing it as a distraction from missing Eddie

- the whole break from the internet and the “you better back me up here babe” look

- no offense I’m straight, and he’s straight, hopelessly pining for my straight best friend

- catholic guilt and “we married for the church”

- Chris running to bucks place when he’s upset

- the WILL

- married kitchen fight

- “it’s me. I’m your renter”

Anyway these are just off the top of my head. Please add more as they come to you because they are so insane for each other. We have to move on fast bc there’s no other option

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Just remembered that Buck canonically moved into Eddie's house so he could go to El Paso, that Buck and Maddie canonically had a conversation that included the words "are you?" "in love with Eddie?" "it wouldn't be so crazy" and that Eddie was canonically behind the reason of his last breakup because his ex saw Eddie as the competition, life is worth living

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Fuck it Friday

Tagged by @circledwithaheart 💖 enjoy some Buck moves in with Pepa!

“You avoiding me, Buckley?" He asks, humor in his voice belying the insecurity beneath.

"No," Buck laughs, trying for as normal as possible. "Pepa really has just had me really busy. Mowing her lawn and clearing out attic."

"The attic?" Eddie seems surprised.

"Yeah, she said she doesn't want her kids to have to go through it after she passes."

"Jesus," Eddie pinches his nose, "she is so morbid sometimes."

“Well, I've met a few of her friends who've come over to play bridge and pinch my cheeks, apparently, and they all kind of talk like that. Weirdly, it's kind of comforting?"

"Huh," Eddie snorts. "Catholics."

"Oh, also, I found a picture of you. You're just a baby. Wanna see?"

Tagging @keeperofdragons @911varietyposts @minalover @super-powerful-queen-slayyna if ya want no pressure!

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"Did you know people are masturbating to your smut fics-- 🤢" I hope they get twice as wet as I did writing it, mind your fucking business.

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just saying SOMETHING would fit really well sliding into the divot of his abs and pecs im JUST SAYING hes ALREADY LUBRICATED

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shit idek i just needed to do it...

Buck can feel Eddie's fingers tapping against his skin. His palm is hot where it presses against the center of Bucks spine. At first Buck didn't think anything of it, thought the tapping was just part of Eddie's nervous habit when things go overly quiet. They're lazing around after a particularly hot round of morning sex. It's the first morning of a 96 off stretching out before them. After Buck had gotten back from taking Chris to school Eddie had tumbled him down to the bed, his hands and mouth roving Buck's body. It had ended with Buck bringing them both off all over Eddie's pecs while Eddie was two fingers deep making Buck see god. Now those same fingers keep tap tap tapping before pausing and then restarting in the exact same rhythm. It only takes Buck a few seconds of concentration before realizing its Morse Code. And maybe Eddie doesn't realize Buck knows it too. Or maybe he does and this is easier for him. Buck learned it from a HAM radio operator in Montana all those years ago and he's never been more glad for it than right now. He's pretty sure he knows what the words are but to be certain he closes his eyes and concentrates on the longs and shorts, works out what he had already suspected I love you.

They haven't said the words to one another yet, this thing between them is still so raw and new and fragile. Both of them too afraid to shatter the near perfection they've found so far.

But buck feels it. Has felt it for years now if he's honest with himself. Felt it long before Tommy threw it in his face. Long before Maddie looked at him with near disappointment and disbelief.

This immense love he has for Eddie fills up every empty nook and cranny he has. Eddie has carved out his spot inside of Buck's heart so deeply and so thoroughly that he can't remember a time when he didn't carry Eddie around with him everywhere he went.

Buck had never known that loving someone could feel like this. He never knew that just the act of loving someone this much could complete a puzzle he hadn't even realized he was trying to put together. But he knows it now, and there is nothing he won't do to hold onto it.

Feeling Eddie tap it out on his skin repeatedly, like it's a compulsion that he can't stop, fills Buck with so much happiness that it bubbles out of him, his face splitting into a wide grin as his fingers start to tap out a return message.

When Eddie finally catches on to what Buck is doing his movement stutters, he loses the rhythm of the message but it doesn't matter because Buck already heard it loud and clear.

Eddie tips Buck's head up, his eyes searching Buck's face before he starts a new message. His gaze never strays from Buck's as his fingers move

.._. ___ ._. . ..._ . ._.

Buck feels his breath hitch as Eddie's eyes bore into his, the truth of it written in the depths of Eddie's heated stare. The word bounces around in Buck's brain, just like its being written slowly and deliberately across his skin, forever.

All Buck can do is nod and let his eyes slip closed as Eddie pulls him forward into a desperate, needy kiss that starts round two while round one is still cooling on their bodies.

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BUCK AND EDDIE + hugs throughout the seasons

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about to make a long corny post about buddie look away

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I am home, she thought, and stopped in wonder at the thought. I am home, I am home.

@buddienetwork​ event: home ((inspo))

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Awesome! ALL of this!

season 9 should open with Buck renting out the spare room in Pepa’s house. Buck should be rolling up to the fire station with a copy of Eddie’s high school senior picture that Pepa gave him. He should be chuckling because some junk mail arrived and it mixed up their names so it’s addressed to “Evan Diaz”. Buck should be telling Ravi about how his “roomie” likes to watch Wheel of Fortune and eat big bowls of pistachio ice cream with him. He should be sending Eddie nightly selfies when they aren’t on shift where they’re baking together or watching Eddie’s last ballroom dance competition or playing scrabble. And crucially Eddie should be in the background of all of this, red as a tomato, and torn between thinking he’s all adorable and thinking this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to him.

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Characters: Evan "Buck" Buckley, Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Christopher Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Additional Tags: Getting Together, Kissing Summary:

Buck is home watching Chris, who is recovering from minor surgery, when Eddie gets back from shift. It's been a tough one (TW - children don't make it), and Buck helps to look after Eddie. And maybe that leads to a few more steps forward in their relationship (much to Chris' relief!).

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i am foaming at the mouth for buddie canon. ive read more fanfiction for buddie than i have for any other ship. i have seen buddie happen in a million ways except for canon. i need it to be canon. i dont care if they end up as murderous drug dealers or homeless dads. make. them. canon. im losing my mind with every second of this hiatus and ever word of fanfiction i read

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ok gonna preface this with i do not want to write this someone else please do it !!!!

that being said. imagine occupational therapist buck buckley, specializing in pediatrics and working with chris diaz and his gorgeous greek god of a dad. imagine buck and chris bonding over like, literally everything. animals, space, the posters buck has in his office. having additional support needs (buck either has a limp and walks with a cane or has a prosthetic, due to the engine bombing incident). imagine a very demisexual eddie diaz venting to, idk, someone, about this super nice super kind and understanding OT who chris like, totally adores, and the Someone is like okay so what's the problem and eddie is ranting about how he doesn't understand why this giant teddy bear of a guy who looks about as scary as a panda makes him all, like, uncomfortable! uncomfortable like *mimicking a leer* oh god no, not at all. like, he gets all nauseous and his heart beats too fast and he feels oddly twitchy? and there's something about buck's arms that draw his eyes like magnets and he is furious about it because what the fuck is going on with his body right now. and the Someone is laughing at him and is like sounds like you've got a crush, pal to which eddie scoffs as if!

but he can't help but think of you've got a crush, you've got a crush, you've got a crush the next time they have an appointment and buck shoots them a dazzling smile hello and eddie's stomach dives and swoops and he thinks oh fuck me what the hell

anyway. eddie is smitten, and buck is so charmed by this lovely, positive child and his insanely attractive dad (despite the fact that he's kind of strange and clearly is terrified of buck sadface)!

someone please have at it.

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9-1-1, In a Flash 6x10

Official Promo

Actual screenshot from the show

Fanart

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Like a new friend!

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Sounds perfect.

i had a dream that 9x4 was an episode titled “Eddie” and it was about eddie having to work an entire shift without buck (crucially they were roommates so this whole time buck is waiting for him at home). and it had a lot of calls and action and stuff but between them eddie kept having little conversations with the people around him (the 118, randos on calls,) and somehow every single one ended up being about buck. and with each one you could see eddie realizing more and more what he feels about him, what it means for his sexuality, all of it. and then the episode ends with him coming home, and he looks exhausted because he had a long draining day and he drops down on the couch next to buck and buck smiles at him and eddie reaches out and holds his hand. what the fuckkkkk