onlinedating-adventures

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Wedding Budget Hacks: Invitations

So, news: I am engaged!  We’d beed talking about getting married for a while, then took an impromptu vacation to Orlando for Disney and Universal and he proposed in front of Hogwarts with a Harry Potter ring.  It was great.

We both want a small, low-stress wedding to whatever extent that is possible.  The wedding is going to be on October 14 of this year, which is pretty much exactly ten weeks from when he proposed.

Amazingly, we’ve already done a fair amount of the planning - we’ve set a date, found a ceremony venue (just need to submit paperwork with the local parks department), found a reception venue (just need to make a deposit to officially lock in the date, and that’s happening this week), figured out the menu, set up a website, checked in with friends we want in the wedding party, etc.  We’re shooting for about 40 people, which is ridiculously small for a wedding which makes it easier to book a local restaurant rather than a Wedding Venue which would cost probably twice as much per person.

One thing I stumbled upon by chance that I want to make sure everyone else who is planning a wedding on a budget knows about is that you can buy wedding invitation kits from Michael’s (and probably a bunch of other craft stores).

The specific kit that I bought contains 30 invitation cards, 30 envelopes, 30 RSVP cards, 30 envelopes for those, and some ribbons and tags that I’m honestly not sure what they’re intended for but will find a use for them.  The kit was originally marked at $39.99, but I got it on clearance for $11.99.  It was on clearance because the invitations in the box didn’t match the ones shown on the box (which I knew before buying it, so that’s fine).  That means I have the wrong item number, but if I had the right item number I could use that website to type out the invitations and print them pretty.  I could probably google it if I really wanted, but since I only need to create like 25 of them I just bought a calligraphy pen for five bucks and wrote them by hand and they look pretty.

Since basically nobody these days actually uses RSVP cards if you can RSVP online, I’m not actually putting the cards intended as RSVP cards in with the invitations when I mail them.  Instead, I’ll use them to create name cards for table settings at the reception so I don’t have to buy more stationary for that later.  I’m also going to figure out a pretty and unobtrusive way for the cards to communicate meal choice and food allergies so that waiters are aware of those.

If you order invitations from a place like Shutterfly, you will definitely spend more than $1.00 per invitation (and you spend more if you buy fewer invitations), which can add up fast.  Instead, I spent about 40 cents per invitation.

-E

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There’s a dating app that matches you based on your hatred of things. Drawing from social psychologists’ research that shows people often bond over their shared dislike of others, Hater takes the opposite approach of other swipe-based dating apps and pairs you based on your dislikes, like slow walkers or paying extra for guacamole, rather than your shared interests. Source Source 2

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Reblog this within 30 seconds in order to receive luck in your efforts for romance, assistance in your relationships, and/or to help easy conflict in your current relationship. Likes charge.

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and for the record, the gym sucks, i don’t work out, i don’t lift, and i don’t care if other people do or don’t.

but false advertising is rude, so if you’re going to describe yourself as “fit” you’d better be able to deliver. 

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wecanthavethat

Was is like bad photo, different lighting, different haircut, weird angle, cheeks full of peanutbutter at the time, or straight up different person? Did they at all address that the photo was misleading?

It’s honestly very hard to explain. 

He has multiple photos on his profile. Most seem to have been taken at the same time (same clothes, same lighting, same hair/facial hair) but they’re all reasonably clear and from different angles. They’re not bad, but they’re also not the kinds of pictures where I think he stole them from a professional model or something. He basically looks like a soulful, scruffy lumberjack who took some selfies around his apartment. 

And then the side panel that lists your orientation and gender and height and body type, he self-describes as “fit.” Now, I guess that can be fairly subjective, but the combination of 5″11′, Fit, and Scruffy Lumberjack Pictures had me reasonably comfortable with what I was expecting.

And then in person... gosh. It was like I was on a date with the dorky younger brother of the guy on the profile.  He looks similar to the profile pictures, but kind of like... “once I hit puberty, I’ll be the guy in those pictures.” 

If he hadn’t self-described as “fit,” I wouldn’t be harping on this, but his body type is the textbook definition of average. Not muscular, clearly not athletic, and a very thin neck (which I noted specifically because his pictures made it look like he had a more muscular neck!) And then facially... idk I guess he’s worked out that from certain angles, his jaw photographs really strong, and then in person his whole face was just... shorter? less chiseled? worse? He looked much, much younger, and was very childish in terms of speech and behavior. 

I don’t know if he even realizes how unlike his pictures he looks. Like, there’s a couple pictures where he looks more like he does in person... but they’re literally the last two out of several pictures on his profile, so I had just assumed they were old! NO. THE NEW PICTURES ARE JUST MISLEADING. GO TO THE GYM. 

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Honestly, it’s in your best interest to post accurate pictures. Obviously you want to look good, but you also don’t want people to be shocked/disappointed when they actually meet you. 

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I had a date yesterday, and I swear to god, when I look at his profile pictures, I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE HOW DIFFERENT HE LOOKED IN PERSON.

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October Dating Theme: You are much less attractive than your picures????

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honestly unicorn hunters can go ahead and die 

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Fucking Unicorn Hunter Couple Profile: Hey! What's up?

Me: I'm sorry, what about my profile said "unicorn" to you? It clearly states I'm looking for a monogamous, long-term relationship."

FUHCP: Well, considering I didn't read your profile it would be impossible for me to know that.

Me: IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO KNOW WHAT IS LITERALLY ON THE SPARKNOTES SIDEBAR OF MY PROFILE. IT WOULD BE LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO HAVE TAKEN A CURSORY GLANCE AT THE PROFILE OF THE PERSON YOU ARE MESSAGING. IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO KNOW NOT EVERY BISEXUAL WANTS TO BE YOUR SEX TOY. AMAZING.

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Dumbass:

Me, after looking at his profile: Hey, thanks for the message, but I'm not interested. Best of luck!

Dumbass: You don't know anything about me! How do you know you aren't interested?

Me: Hm well let's do a thought experiment. Do you message every girl on OKCupid? Probably not, right? So how do you decide who to message? Is it... their profiles? Do you read profiles and look at pictures and then decide who you want to message? Well, imagine, for a moment, that I looked at your pictures and your profile, and based on THE SAME INFORMATION YOU USE TO DETERMINE WHETHER YOU ARE INITIALLY INTERESTED, I AM NOT INTERESTED.

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Me: You need to actually reference profile things if you're going to claim to have read my profile. Like, I read your profile, so I might message you about biking or world history.

ApologyBro: Yes, I am studying to teach world history! And I really did read your profile; I'm very honest!

Me: OK BUT YOU STILL HAVE NOT ACTUALLY REFERENCED ANYTHING THAT WOULD PROVE YOU HAVE READ MY PROFILE, AND YOUR INSISTENCE ON YOUR OWN HONESTY HAS NO VALUE

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“what brings you to this site, anyway?” “what are you looking to find here?”

OH, I’M SORRY, IS THIS NOT OKCUPID.COM? IS OKCUPID.COM NOT A DATING WEBSITE?

I SUPPOSE A CLEVER MAN COULD INFER I WAS BROUGHT TO THIS SITE BY A DESIRE TO DATE, AND I’M LOOKING TO FIND DATES HERE.

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i’ve been sick in bed all day, i’m on the tailwinds of my period, i am so not in any mood to coddle internet men

all i want to coddle is my cat and a wine bottle

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also classic: I READ YOUR ENTIRE PROFILE AND FOUND IT VERY INTERESTING

(notably absent: any reference to anything at all on my profile)

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uuuugh he took my critique of his pathetic and needy messaging style as an invitation for small talk anD I HATE WHEN THEY DO THAT

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the level of neediness implicit in including a sincere plea for validation in every message is just too much for me. i can’t.