onlypaws

[onlypaws]

Bothering the beast

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Thine eyes hath witnessed the death god, and he, lord Hades with broad shoulders said: who's a good kitty?

Tis I. Mine own being is thee good kitty.

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It's him. He's the serial killer. The Tuna Eating Terror

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Agreed. Everyone has hobbies, even if it is getting horned up for a 60 year old man with a magician's mustache in a Sonic movie. Perfectly normal.

sorry but the scene where eggman grabs his henchman by the inner mouth made me blush

[onlypaws]

No place quite so comfortable than the floor and a very hard edge.

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He's sharpening his teeth for the war

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This is her partner in crime

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I'm prettier than you.

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Taz is a victim of his own audacity. The box was worth the fuckin nearly %30 interest affirm payments tho.

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Tony has a fan club and we love that for him

encounter i had yesterday

after my gay tortoise wedding crasher experience i feel like there's a nonzero chance that tony's handler will see this somehow im sorry if i didn't remember what you looked like accurately, i was distracted by your shirt and the cutest puppy i ever saw in my life

[onlypaws]

Source: poeticalphotos

[onlypaws]

Every time a dog person explains why he likes dogs over cats, he just explains a cat.

Seriously though, if you ask a person why they like a dog they always explain things dogs don't like or don't do but cats do naturally.

"I want a animal that snuggles and loves me!"

If my cat does not get his nightly snuggle he dies inside. If he's not around you 24/7 he just hides under the bed. All the cats I grew up with thrived off of pets and love and the one who didn't was a weirdo barn cat who absolutely did but just wanted to be pet in places where he didn't have scars/ trauma from his past life.

You look at dogs and even the most friendly ones don't like being fawned over. They don't like their heads pet (cats love that, that's how they spread their scent). They don't like being hugged (cats live for that). They don't like being manhandled (cats love being held upside down and dangled and messed with ((gently of course))).

Like every time they bring this up they will mention their dog and it is whale eyeing, panting, appeasement smiling and visibly very very uncomfortable.

"I don't want a animal that pees everywhere."

Literally clean their cat boxes daily and it stops. If you can't or your cat is like Taz and demands an every 12-hour schedule, affirm pay an automatic catbox like I did. Problem disappears. I would also like to point out, if you aren't at your dog's beck and call to let them out, they pee and poo everywhere! I had many dogs over my life and like it was the single most problematic part of them (Aside from the eating the drywall). You had to let them out CONSTANTLY or there was a biohazard in the foyer.

"I want an animal that won't eat me when I am dead."

Neither will eat you unless you are dead for days and they are starving, and statistically speaking, your dog is much more likely to eat you than your cat. Have you ever seen a cat after someone they love dies? They nearly go cationic, they are far more likely to starve to death trying to wake you up, but also lets be real, if you are dying alone and going unnoticed to the point that you're eaten... baby in the nicest way possible you probably shouldn't have pets. You have bigger problems.

"I want an animal I can do anything to without being bit"

Then get a fish. You can't "do anything to your dog without being bit". Often people train the vocal warning signs out of dogs while refusing to learn any sort of doggish body language. You CAN'T do anything to your dog, you may not have been bit yet, but you will be if you have this mentality. This is the reason why so many small breed dogs bite and are violent, not because they are by nature, but because a considerable amount of dog owners think they can and should do whatever they like without repercussions and it is easier to ignore and belittle a animal when it is small.

But also if you're looking at tolerance to bullshit cats are where it's at. My cats have their claws, and they don't like being picked up, none the less if I decide to annoy them and pick them up and give them belly kisses and shove my face in theirs they just fix me with a resigned "god you're stupid" look. If I did that to my non-traumatized dog he would lose his mind. If I did it to my rescue, I'd lose my nose, and it would be completely on me.

Tolerance for handling depends on size, breed, animal, temperament, and treatment and I hate to break it to you, dogs have a significantly lower tolerance for it than cats. A lot of you abuse your dogs through your negligence to learn their behaviour. Literally just watch "It's me or the dog" and 99% of the time it's "leave him alone, stop stressing him tf out, you don't need your whole body on him all the waking day."

"I want an animal I can train"

You clearly have never had a cat. They are incredibly smart and comparing training my cats to training my lab is night and day. Dude is 10 years old and still cycles through everything before he gets to "sit" (he does it on purpose looking for more treats.) You can train cats to do literally everything a dog can do. I mean I've never taken my cats hunting or anything but watch them with a mouse and I figure they'd do well. The thing is if you never try to do something, you can't say it's impossible. I've never tried meth, yet I'm sure it still exists.

I mean I could go on but it's every time they explain why they prefer dogs, it's just a cat in a different form.

[onlypaws]

They say god made humanity in his image, but I'm fundamentally crule so enjoy no fur, taxes, and a strained relationship with your mother.

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Basking in the global warming death of humanity sun because y'all brought it on yourselves. The moment you're gone is the moment I have the freedom to pee on the monstrous vacuum.

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How it feels when I sleep in the middle of the cold hard hall floor rather than the three beds, one cube I have, and all of the owner's furniture.

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One small step for cat, one giant leap onto the guardian's expensive sheer curtains.