orcmystic
sometimes I'm human, and then sometimes I eat.
beginning weight: 85KG---current weight: 85KG --- goal weight: 36 KG
465 posts
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Last Seen Blogs
pikapillar
◦•◉✿Koko✿◉•◦
inappropriate-aunt
Inappropriate Aunt
arroro
ARRORO
maily-andre
Mi pequeño Mundo
mementomeix-blog
oиlγ мγsтєяγ ωoятн solvίиġ
Audio
such a good song..
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first time I realized I NEEDED to be skinnier was when I was starting to hit puberty and my father told me my breasts would look fuller/larger if I just lost weight already. Back then I took a lot of pride in having a flat chest and not needing to wear a bra yet. Just recently he admitted to my mother and I that he only recognizes me by the fatness of my ass.
I really really need to be skinny. Not just to fit the clothes, but so I can be perfect for my parents.
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Nothing is more defeating than realizing you’re too fat for an entire store.
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even when I was on my 200-calories-a-day diet and walking down a block would make me almost pass out I was humongous, I had rolls of fat, I didn’t even fit my huge coat, I was so large. and that was the SMALL me. Now I’m so big that nobody loves me!
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why does anything above 500 calories feel like failure
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Eating disorder logic
- I’m lonely I’m going to isolate myself
- I’m hungry I’m going to starve
- I’m full I’m going to eat
- I feel enormous I’m going to binge now
- I can tell I’ve lost weight I’m never eating again
- I’m happy I’m going to trigger myself
- I’m sad I’m going to pretend I’m fine
- gum has 5 calories no
- ice cream has a million calories I’m going to eat a whole 7 pints
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