ouidazeller1101-blog

[ouidazeller1101-blog]

AD 2018: From My Crystal Ball * Naija Latest News ~ 26/01/2018

PULPITS are burning with the fire of predictions. Pentecostal giants are delivering their messages to guide the flock. Necromancers, sorcerers, tricksters, fraudsters and pranksters are also busy. The town is abuzz with predictions - and resolutions -for the New Year.

Now that genuine religious patriarchs and matriarchs have spoken charlatans, who claim to be that voice of the One crying in the wilderness, have been heard and the pandemonium has subsided, it is time for "Editorial Notebook" to weigh in and reveal, for the benefit of the devoted reader, what lies in the belly of the year.

Here then, dear reader, are what to count on in the new year. First, the political scene. Soon after all, lots of have referred to as this the year of politics, in a veiled reference to the run-up to the 2019 basic elections.

The stress on President Muhammadu Buhari to run will be more intense. The army of sycophants, such as some cunning and corny governors, will grow. They will be a lot more vociferous in their Buhari-for-ever campaign. Buhari and the attentive public must ignore them. They are battling to feather their personal nests.

The President ought to ask himself some standard concerns: How properly have I carried out? Can my overall health carry on? Must I just go household and rest? Haven’t I missed my farm so substantially? What will my family’s stand be? Will my wife Aisha (bless a further foray into months of electioneering?) Phrase in brackets not clear. Please review.

Nonetheless on politics: Former Vice President Atiku Abubakar will continue to threaten to run. His opponents will be asking: Exactly where is he running to? Who is pursuing him? Why? Those are, it must be noted, the soft critics. The harsh ones will ask: is the seat for sale?

Atiku, a man of uncommon zest, will soldier on. He will rally the youth and claim to have an understanding of how they feel. His battle to safe the ticket of the Peoples Democratic Celebration (PDP) will virtually split the PDP. Celebration leaders should pray for its survival. They ought to curse the spirit of deception and obfuscation, the kind that sparked the Ali Modu Sheriff - Ahmed Markarfi leadership war.

Some guys will approach Atiku, asking to be hired at a fortune for a walk from Lagos to Abuja to back his ambition. He need to not touch them with a lengthy pole. They are as fake as World wide web fraudsters.

It will be the year of stunts and stunts males. No much more will critical politicians be happy with devouring in public view corn-on-the cob from roadside vendors numerous will transform themselves into hawkers of groundnuts, garden eggs, candy, telephone recharge cards and all such stuff. They will be screaming for patronage in a manner that will lead quite a few to consider that they are mad. No. They are not. No require to rush at them. It is all in a desperate bid to recognize with the masses.

Rejoice, location fathers and location boys, roughnecks, bouncers, thugs and fake herbalists. It is your season the season of politics, of high priced spiritual intercessions, of emergency publicists, of dubious advocates, of free of charge money and, of course, of free of charge food and drinks.

Senators will continue to resist Ibrahim Magu’s headship of the Financial and Monetary Crimes Commission (EFCC). They will rework the EFCC Act, run a public hearing exactly where Magu will be completely scorned and maligned and, at some point, discover a a lot more suitable candidate to replace him- most likely a senator or a former lawmaker.

There will be outrage. Activists will march. Ordinary folks will scream: "Ah senators!" Some will repeat those unproven allegations against the distinguished senators. They will describe the chamber as a conclave of drug barons, ex-convicts, pedophiles and crooks. But fair is fair who can manage the beat better than a man who has noticed it all?

In Ekiti, the PDP will be divided as Governor Ayo Fayose will insist on fielding his deputy, Kolapo Olusola, a professor of creating technologies. A lot of party chiefs will kick. They will claim to be the finest to keep alive Fayose’s enviable legacies, including the magical vote harvesting formula, stomach infrastructure, that has got every single Ekiti resident sporting chubby cheeks and protruding stomachs, their rotundity the envy of all.

"Who is he?" they will be asking of Fayose’s candidate. Does he possess the talents - tailor, fireman, motorcyclist, cooked food vendor and a lot more - that have distinguished Fayose among his peers? How many titles does he have? How several battles has he fought?

Needless to say, Fayose will have his way, but the main election will prove a really hard nut to crack.

In Oyo, the "ewedu, gbegiri and amala" politics will return, pushing aside the present intellectual bent that has been substantially criticised as elitist and sectional. Why? Several devotees of the Adedibu College have joined the ruling All Progressives Congress (APC), bringing along several years of encounter.

Far more states will attempt to catch up with Imo, which will continue to make waves with its Ministry of Happiness and Objective Fulfillment, erection of statues and demolition of troublesome markets. Unable to cope with the army of individuals from other states flooding Imo in search of happiness and fulfillment, Governor Rochas Okorocha will mount a massive campaign that will be tagged "Imo First" or some thing like that. He will be fighting that all indigenes ought to initially taste of this exclusive phenomenon that is drawing individuals as bees to honey.

Akinwunmi Ambode’s image will keep soaring. The Lagos governor’s ambitious programmes will win international accolades. None shall match him. The opposition will obtain it hard to discover a candidate to confront him. There will be a rash of groups campaigning for his return.

Efforts to unite them will not work as additional groups spring up like mushrooms.

The Federal Government will have to move rapid to quit cows from taking more than our towns and cities, which includes Abuja. The animals have turn out to be the indisputable conquerors of the countryside. Gangsters posing as herdsmen will continue their bloody campaign, killing and maiming. The governors, helpless as usual, will console the bereaved, visit morgues and shed tears. They must wear bullet proof vests on such visits to deny the gunmen of snatching away a major trophy.

Pressed to react, the Federal Government will situation a statement, sympathising with these who lost their loved ones and asking the security agents to go after the "perpetrators of the dastardly act". It will threaten to turn the screw on them and bring "the full weight of the law" upon them. Their backers, the government will pressure, will face the "full wrath of the law". All will be quiet for a although. Then, one more attack a round of condemnation and tears. The old statement is whipped off the shelf, reworked and issued. All will be quiet - until a further massacre.

There will be the temptation to withdraw $1b from the Excess Crude Account to fight the criminals, but some governors, these who kicked against spending such funds on the anti-Boko Haram war and other security challenges, will rise. We really should be cautious as it all becomes a matter of academics and legal gymnastics.

The Super Eagles will be at the Planet Cup in Russia. There will be a huge campaign to make sure that we make history as the initial African nation to win the trophy. The Nigeria Football Federation (NFF) will get in touch with for prayers - from individuals of all faiths and atheists.

The odds are against our team, but the globe will acknowledge that we have got talents. 1 point: Minister Solomon Dalung should watch his tongue. No additional "we qualified without having conceding a goal" and such empty bathroom talks. In addition to, he should really guarantee that the group is not declared missing (he claimed not to know their whereabouts of our team just ahead of the 2016 Olympics in Brazil).

Frontline entertainers P-Square will be below stress from their heart broken fans, who will be begging them to reunite. Both sides will mount a enormous verbal war. After a when, the twins will announce that in the interest of their several fans, they are back collectively - sturdy and hot.

On the foreign scene, North Korea will continue to get lots of interest. Its leader Kim Jong-un will stay a discomfort in the neck for United States President Donald Trump. North Korea will forge ahead with its nuclear programme, testing extra intercontinental ballistic missiles. Trump, in a series of tweets, will retain saying that the United States will not permit a nuclear energy North Korea. Kim Jon-un will assure all that the nuclear button is appropriate on his table, but he will neither be provoked nor tempted to press it. Trump will reply that his button is larger than Kim’s. And the battle of wits and muscle flexing will go on ad infinitum.

The year will end on a rather busy note. Motorists will be running about like sheep without having a shepherd, hunting for fuel. Fares will rise. Airports will be jammed as harmattan - harsh, dry, dusty and cloudy - impairs visibility. The government will announce with magisterial aplomb that it has found these behind the perennial petrol shortage - blackmailers. They will be warned to pull the brakes on their evil act or face the full wrath of the law for their "unacceptable" conduct. They will not listen.

In all, it will be an thrilling year - all items being equal.

Iron Mike Tyson and his new trade

BOXING good Michael Gerard Tyson has come a extended way. World heavyweight champion - 50 wins (44 by knockouts) and six losses - ex-convict, film star, dad and darling of fans all over the planet. He earned - and blew - $300m.

Like numerous ex-stars, he couldn’t manage his achievement. He went to prison for rape. He lost his daughter and he started begging for roles in movies to prevent dying in penury.

Now the "Iron man" has found a new trade - he has opened a cannabis ranch in California. The 40-acre house is in California City, a town with a population of just 15,000 individuals southwest of Death Valley. The ranch will be researching into clinical advantages of marijuana. Health-related marijuana has been legalised in California in the previous 20 years. Farmers will be taught how to grow the stuff in the Tyson Cultivation College. There are other facilities.

The legend’s grass-to-grace story, which a lot of will not hesitate to describe as zero-to-hero and hero-to-zero, provides a massive lesson to all who strive to excel. To stay a achievement is the real test of a thriving males.