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She was such a warm-hearted soul. She always cared for others but after awhile life decided to chip away at her soul and suddenly she was cold.

mrssandycheeks (via wordsnquotes)

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A picture of the temple–each parts were drawn by different children.

子供達の絵を重ね合わせてできた神殿の絵。

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ETIQUETTE FOR STARBUCKS-ING (The Pasosyal Way)

1. Make your name a little more sosyal pakinggan. Para kapag tinawag ng barista, “TALL CARAMEL MACCHIATO FOR BADONG!”     

2. When making selfie kasama ang inorder mong kape, wag masyadong iharap ang logo para mas sosyal. Understood na ng mga FB friends mo na nasa Starbucks ka kase green yung straw.

3.Kahit gutom na gutom ka na, don’t ever ask the barista kung may tinda silang siomai. Magtiyaga ka sa croissant.

4. When the barista ask “Venti?”, don’t ever say, “Naku sobra naman! Isa lang pu.”

5. Super proud sa pag-order ng ‘secret recipe’ sabay Gi-noPro. Extreme Adventure ang pagkakape? Wag naman ganon.

6. When making chika with friends, dalawang higop lang per topic para hindi agad maubos.

7. Don’t make socialize with anyone saying, “Oh.My.Gosh. I so love their FRAPUSINO here.”

8. If you want to make wifi lang ‘coz sawang sawa ka na sa Free FB, order order din pag may time. Kahit choco-donut man lang.

9. Magdala ng props na libro kung balak mong tumambay habambuhay. Para kapag tinanong ka ng sosyal friend mo kung anong ginagawa mo, you’ll simply say, “Ayyy. Binabasa ko lang ‘tong favorite novel ko. Precious Heart’s Romance Presents: Gayuma, Chocnut at Pag-ibig.”

10. Pabulong lang ang panghihingi ng sticker para sa planner. Pero wag na wag magmamakaawa. Isang malaking ka-dukhaan yan.

11.  Kung may balak kang bitbitin palabas ang Mocha Frap mo kahit isang higop na lang naman, balutan ng tissue ang lalagyan para hindi halatang walang laman.

12. Kapag napansin mong paubos na yung inorder mo. Wag pahalata. Ibalik ang laway tapos higupin ulit. Repeat until fade.

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What kind of women does the Lord need us to be?

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The most valuable inspiration will be for you to know what God would have you do.

President Henry B. Eyring

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BECAUSE THERE’S A WALL THAT SHE OFTEN HIDES BEHIND.

There’s unusual excitement everywhere - the kind of excitement that she never imagined in her whole life, the kind of excitement that only certain people share and understand.

She doesn’t share the same cosmic feeling they have. Although she knows that at some point, she has to.

People tell her what she needs to do, what she needs to be. But if all she wants right now is to sit with loneliness for a while, would that make her less wise? Would that make her a woman of the world?

That wall that she hides behind - it’s there and it’s not gonna come down anytime. All she wants right now is some oxygen, as so she can breathe in the sea of excitement and expectations.

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Perhaps many things inside you have been transformed; perhaps somewhere, someplace deep inside your being, you have undergone important changes while you were sad.

Rainer Maria Rilke (via quotemadness)

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And the test of patience commences again.

When someone returns home from her mission, people expect her to be more mature, stronger and smarter than she used to be. They expect her to change. 

So sometimes, she tries to satisfy the people around her by keeping a cheerful countenance, always looking ready to face any challenge. Ready to date. And eventually ready to marry. 

But there’s a part of her that is so vulnerable, which nobody knew, and she set it aside for a long time for a better purpose. She waited until she could go home “and think her own thoughts.” And that’s when she understood the character of Christ.

Now that she’s done with her mission, that vulnerable part, which slept for a long time, suddenly felt as if a hot and painful thing rose from deep inside, slowly erupting, ready to burst. And for the first time in a long time, she broke down. It felt good not having to conceal all those feelings. It has always felt good to cry. 

“Thinking my own thoughts is not a very happy thing to do.”, she thought. She’s grateful however for through the cry, she was able to let out the pain that she kept for so long.  

She doesn’t talk to anybody about this. She doesn’t date either. The only reason she entertained a few suitors is so she could avert loneliness. But she realized she needs to “learn her way around loneliness” without using others.

She expected herself to be stronger now. She backslid a few times, making a mess out of her actions and stubbornness. But one thing she learned from the mission is that she could always get another chance, she could always get an answer to her pleadings, relying on God’s mercy.

At times, she’s tempted to wonder how much more time it will take before He answers her prayers. It’s been months, she thought.

But then she realized that there must be a reason why she’s always waited.  Yes, “she was always waiting, it seemed to be her forte.” And along with the waiting were tears of pain. And nobody could comprehend it except God.  

When she returned home from her mission, people expected her to be more mature, stronger and smarter than she used to be. They expected her to change.

She didn’t change much. She is still the same lady who writes when she’s hurt, and the lady who has the same weakness. The only thing that changed is her faith. Having experienced miracles in her life, she is extremely sure that whatever she is going through right now will pass. She is sure that with God, nothing is impossible.  

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On choices and realizations.

So I found this thing in the drafts, I think I wrote it on 2013. I don’t remember though why I didn’t finish it. Nabitin ako sa pagbabasa. Gagawa na lang ako ng continuation. Haha.

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Today, I was awoken by a strange, sudden feeling of urgency. I was still so sleepy but my mind was telling me to wake up and do something. DO SOMETHING. A very striking statement. A sad realization that I've been doing nothing for four months already. In fact, I've been doing nothing for four years. My, why did I waste away?

My first real job was a dream come true. How does it sound when I say I worked in the country's largest TV network? I remember sounding rather casual than proud when I tell people who asked. I tried to stay as low profile as possible but my proud parents just couldn't help telling people where I worked - even when they got nothing from me but free tickets to TV shows, sponsor bags and gift packs, not a bit of what could have helped in our home expenses. I didn't thought about it then. I was so excited to earn and succeed in my career. I loved my job so much that it didn't matter if I worked 24/7. It didn't even matter if I sleep in the office. In fact, it became my second home. I shared a small condominium unit with 5 girls. It was so small that when you get home last, you're lucky if you find a comfortable space to sleep in. Unfortunately, I was always the last to go home, - drunk or not. So I often found myself walking back to the office, getting past rugby boys and high school students vomiting on the sidewalk after getting wasted at Guilly's. And there at our editing bay, where the carpet was so comfortable it didn't matter if it has been stepped on a gazillion times by gazillions of dirty shoes, I slept. I learned to be very thankful for a three-hour sleep, and I learned to appreciate a 5-minute nap a lot. 

Today, I am about to make a decision that will change the course of my life, a decision that is directed towards a very important goal. 

I have made a lot of wrong decisions in my life and I don't think I can handle another.

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“We may be just two different clocks, that do not tock in unison.

Lang Leav

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It’s like he left, but he didn’t.

It's been more than 24 hours since Paul Walker died, and even though I don't know him personally, I can't stop thinking about what happened. Paul's blue eyes, warm smile, kindness, and humility never failed to make my heart race. Watching his movies has always brought joy to my heart.

It's indeed a shock, like every death that comes. I feel very emotional, like most people do. If this is how fans feel, I am certain that his family, friends and people who know him personally feel twice as much. Sadness may not even convey the depth of what they must be feeling. I remember a line from One Tree Hill which says, "Grief is like the ocean: it's deep and dark and bigger than all of us. And pain is like a thief in the night. Quiet. Persistent. Unfair. Diminished by time and faith and love." But although death is a sad phase especially for the loved ones who have been left behind, it's comforting to know that God is merciful, and because He is, He sent His only begotten son Jesus Christ to redeem us from our sins. And because of his atonement, we will be resurrected in His own due time. What I'm saying is that death is not the end.

Someday, we all hope to see Paul, and I'm sure that when we do, we will be seeing him smiling his humble, but heartfelt smile. It's difficult right now and all I can do for Paul is to pray that his loved ones will be comforted.

Paul, if it's possible that you could read this right now, I'd like to thank you for your inspiration and kindness. Filipinos will never forget you. We will always remember your charity. We will always love you.

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