owaranainoseraph

[owaranainoseraph]

Chronically online dom who tells you to kill yourself when you ask to cum

[owaranainoseraph]

[owaranainoseraph]

when i was 9 i was banned from editing the muscovy duck wikipedia page because i kept editing any mention of the flavor of their meat to say things like “they taste like dirty dishwater” because i had pet muscovy ducks and couldn’t bear the thought of them being eaten, so i tried to run a smear campaign on duck meat

[owaranainoseraph]

Transphobia is so antithetical to genuine feminism it blows my mind there's such a wide overlap like you either believe in autonomy and self determination or you don't

[owaranainoseraph]

[owaranainoseraph]

I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

[owaranainoseraph]

[owaranainoseraph]

young man. what is that you have found.

I said young man. you picked it up off the ground.

I said young man. you should put that thing down.

I don't think! that! you! should! eat that!

[owaranainoseraph]

Six year old, bouncing up and down with glee as desserts are unpacked: "I'm so appointed!"

Took me a moment to realize she had logically assumed "appointed" must be the opposite of "disappointed" and used it as a synonym for "excited."

[owaranainoseraph]

Megan Thee Stallion Beavis and Butthead collectable diner placemat I saw in my dream

[owaranainoseraph]

[owaranainoseraph]

This shit literally looks like those evil underground science labs in movies where they do unethical experiments on children

[owaranainoseraph]

Going to scary zoo. Want anything?

[owaranainoseraph]

[owaranainoseraph]

themes commonly found in international friendships

- ‘u dont have (insert food/music/restaurant here) over there??’ - ‘wait what time is it. shouldnt u be asleep’ - alternatively: timezoned/clockblocked again - ‘do u need a hug. have a virtual hug’ - weird slang terms - ‘i will fight everyone thats mean to u. i will fight them rn’ - vague embarrassment regarding ur accent - ‘dont maKE ME COME OVER THERE’ - ‘oh yeah i have a friend who lives in (insert country here) and apparently’ - no real hugs :(( - suffering - fahrenheit vs celsius - the measuring of things in feet fucks one of u up, probably

[owaranainoseraph]

*Applying for a job*

Manager: So, how would you describe yourself?

Me: *Avril Lavigne voice* Ka-ka-ka-kawaii xD

Manager: YOU’RE HIRED

[owaranainoseraph]

"kill them with kindness" WRONG. chair attack 🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑