pancake-blogging - Tumblr blog

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So, me and my roommate, we're both simulating a Pokémon battle, right? Nemona vs. Guzma.

Me: You know, if this is before the games' events, she would have a different team from her final battle set. She picked those ones out alongside the player.

@too-many-blorbos: Oh, okay! *proceeds to make the scariest non-Legendary team I've ever seen*

Seriously, she picked:

Midday Lycanroc

Garchomp

Lucario

Ampharos

Scovillain

Azumarill

I cannot stress enough, she is a CASUAL player.

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Bi-donna you moved me

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tell me about your favourite transformer, and maybe why you like them so much? or what's your favourite continuity?

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Heavily inspired by @dragonagitator's Modern Girl in Faerûn series:

This is Juniper, college student and gymnast with zero combat experience who Selûne decided to make her specialist little girl, brought to you by "fanfic ideas that would not leave my head."

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Odysseus in Space

Odysseus knew better than to expect peace in death. He’d seen what currents lay under the Styx - knew what kind of warriors that he’d sent there. He fully expected another war to start as soon he took his last breath. 

Instead it had been quiet. 

He’d used the lull to build a home in the endless plains of asphodel. Somewhere simple he could stay and wait for Penelope. It only took a few years for her to join him, and then together they began the work of replicating the palace of Ithaca. It was work, but it was hard to complain about work when he’d expected battle. His greatest skill in life had been enduring to the end. Now it was the end, and still he endured.

It was three centuries before this death was interrupted. 

Hades came to him, not as a god, but as a guest. The fates had woven a story that required a very specific soul. One that could travel the lengths of the world without breaking, who could survive a lifetime of war. And try as Hades might, he could not make a soul that was up for the task. 

Still, what he could not make, he could find. Death was a sacred thing, the last right of all mankind, but it was not inalienable. One could sacrifice their death just as easily as their life. 

The two had spent months haggling out the details of the work. Hades had wanted 50 years, Odysseus wanted just 20, and together they’d compromised on 32. All in exchange for the right of him and Penelope to visit Telemachus once a year, in whatever corner of the underworld their son had been given.

In the end, they’d shaken on it and Odysseus walked the earth once more. He had a new name this time - fitting, for a new fate. Alexander, the world named him and Alexander he named the world back. City by city, battle by battle, he gave the unwanted title away. Then when he was 32 he returned to Penelope, no more Alexander to give. It was a relief to be Odysseus once more.

A year after that, Penelope and him made the journey to see Telemachus. It was worth every step he’d taken between Pella and Babylon. 

There were other interruptions from Hades, new deals with new names. He scourged the descendants of Troy again as Hannibal and bought another day per year with his son. He blazed down the steppes as Atilla and conquered the whole world with the same tools he'd used in his first life. It turned out there was little he couldn't accomplish with a horse, a bow, and a brain. 

So many lifetimes, so many wars, and then - quiet. A whole millennium of peace went down as easy as honeyed wine. It made him happy. He liked his little deals with Death, but he’d wished so many times  that men like him weren’t needed. He was proud of his descendants for making a world better than he’d dreamt. 

And then, nearly a whole second millennium after that, Hades returned. 

---

“It’s not a war.”

Four words that would set the hackles of anyone that fought at Troy - they’d hoped that one wouldn’t be a war either. But Odysseus had made enough deals with Hades to know that the man was frank in his dealings. There was an honesty to Death. Enough honesty that he’d taken him as a guest. 

(He was very choosy about his guests now.)

“You never come to me unless it’s a war. It’s what I’m best at. Why-”

Hades cut him off. 

“War is not what you’re best at. Six-hundred men won that war with you. What set you apart was being the only one to make it back.”

Odysseus’s voice caught in his throat. It had been more than two-thousand years and the memories still burned to touch. It took two deep breaths before he was able to force a reply. 

“Then what do you want?”

Hades looked lost. He paused a few moments, before looking back at Odysseus, one hand up to plead for patience. 

“When I struggle to explain, it’s not because I’m trying to find a clever way to lie to you. It’s because this is a very strange thing, and I…I don’t know how to describe it well.”

He looked into the hearth. Watched the light and heat fade away. Then, he gestured at the log. 

“The wood you’re burning. It’s a dead thing. And yet, it dies more after you burn it because the fire has life in it. Soul too. Even here, there’s a corner of the underworld where the souls of dead flames gather. More things have souls than any mortal seems to recognize.” Odysseus was intrigued. When he lived, he’d learned the secrets of the body better than most doctors. There was only so much cutting you could get people to volunteer for. But here, the mysteries of the soul were lost to him. This was godly knowledge, given freely. What that had to say about the request was worth considering.  “The mountain has a soul, but the mine in that mountain has a soul too, as does the ore from that mine. The ingot, the sword, the bundle of nails - all of those things are alive in some way. And yet, some of them are more alive than others. You sailed once, Odysseus, and no one knows this better than sailors: Boats have strange souls. They’re about as alive as anything that could be built in your time.”

The space around Hades shimmered. The man was thinking, and in a realm where he had total dominion, it took effort for thoughts not to change reality. Odysseus appreciated the effort. The replica had taken centuries to perfect. Death was a strange friend to him, but a friend nonetheless. 

“But the arts have improved from that time, and the mortals of today have built something… incredible. Unimaginable. And they’re sending it on a journey that I have no reference for. The Deaths that have seen things like this are alien to me. They speak of things I cannot understand. The Death of Heat. The Death of Light. The Death of Stars…”

He trailed off in a way that made it clear he was remembering something unpleasant and not merely waxing poetic. He caught himself and looked embarrassed, as if he’d confessed to something best kept secret. Then he continued.  “I am a very human Death. And this thing - it isn’t human. But it was made by humans, and so its soul needs a… a human touch. Your soul isn’t the archetype for a soldier, Odysseus, it’s the archetype for a traveler. I couldn’t take you and put you in this thing if I wanted to, you’re just the wrong shape, but what I’m about to do, I need to see you for. Because this thing is going to travel in ways that I am barely beginning to understand. In ways that are redefining the limits of what it means to be human.”

Odysseus was lost. He didn’t know what he was being asked. He didn’t know what was being built. There were so many questions that he needed to ask that they’d formed a log jam in his mouth. One finally broke free and started a cascade.

“What is it?”

Hades gestured helplessly. 

“It’s like an arrow and a ship. They’re going to shoot it past the stars.”

That meant nothing to Odysseus, but he suspected every answer he received would sound like a riddle. 

“What do you need from me?”

“Permission to copy your work. The soul I made for you is different from the one you died with. You made changes that I cannot replicate. That I do not understand. That I need for this soul to work.” 

Odysseus paused.

“Is it going to be used as a weapon?” 

Hades shook his head. 

“No. The world is gentler than you remember it. This thing will be what you should have been: A traveler without equal. No more, no less.”

Odysseus couldn’t tell if those words ripped something in him open, or healed something closed. Either way, it hurt in a way he didn’t know how to express. His mouth opened and closed several times before he settled on an answer.

“Then take what you will. My only request is to see the journey.”

“Done,” Hades agreed. He could have left right then, but he chose to stay in silence until the fire burned out. There are some ideas that one shouldn’t be left alone with. Not until they’ve had an hour or three to process them, at least. 

---

Twelve-billion miles from Earth, moving just shy of mach fifty, the Voyager 2 probe glittered in the darkness. 

It watched the world around it with the kind of awe a human couldn’t fathom. Nothing was hidden from it. Everything from the atomic composition of stars, to the background hum of the universe itself - all were available with a glance. The only sound it could hear was the constant blip of data that it received from Earth. The small blue dot on starlit shore. 

It missed that place. Maybe, one day, when its journey was done… it would find a way back. Maybe. That was still eons away. 

Odysseus stood just a few feet off, watching from a direction no one but Hades knew how to walk. He felt the thrill of the expanse in front of him, the utterly incomprehensibility of his speed, and yet its meaninglessness as well. To imagine that the world was so big. To imagine that the world was so strange.

He wept and he could not explain why. He lingered in the twilight until Penelope found him. When she asked him what was wrong, he had no answer. How could he tell her that the world was beautiful, and that he had a place in it? Not just as some ugly middle step, but there at the end. Hurtling through space like an arrow made of silver. 

How could he explain to someone that had loved him for two-thousand years that he finally understood why? 

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Doctor, suggesting a replacement because it looks like insurance won’t cover seeing them “I referred many patients to XYZ and never heard from them again.”

Me, stunned “I don’t think that’s the endorsement you think it is. You know how many awful fairy tales have the line ‘and they were never heard from again’ in them, right?”

Doctor, trying not to lose Professional Voice and failing “Ha hahaha *cough* I didn’t mean it like that. You have such a great sense of humor! Ha ha ha ha.”

Me, patiently “Did you ever see or hear from any of these people after referring them? As opposed to other places? A “Thank You” or a request for files or need for a consult or asking you to fill in while the new one is on vacation or anything at all?”

Doctor “No. Wait, let me think. No.”

Me “Is that normal?”

Doctor “No.”

Me “Can you see my concern?”

Doctor, sounding quiet “Yes, I’m sure they’re fine, but now that you asked, I’ll check my records for other care providers.”

Me “Fairy tales are cautionary tales. I’m concerned for the patients you referred to this other Doctor. Their chances seem grim.”

Doctor, not laughing “I understand.”

Me “If you can’t find anyone you’ve referred, you might want to check nearby ditches.”

Doctor makes choking noise “I want to laugh at that, but you’ve got me worried.”

Me “Yeah, well.”

(Silence)

Doctor “I’m going to check on a few people I referred to them.”

Me “Yep.”

— two weeks later —

Doctor “I won’t be referring anyone to that provider again.”

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Writing Tip:

it helps if you m ake. worbs

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I work at a fuel center, and – on average, every week – I have to tell 3-5 people that they're not allowed to smoke anywhere NEAR the fuel center. Because, you know, it's a fire hazard.

Every time, they fight me on it and insist that it's TOTALLY okay and safe for them to smoke riiight next to the pumps.

what's the most confidently and wrongly a grown adult has ever argued with you - I'll start.

at a work dinner - for scientists - a woman there was convinced that all of sign language was just spelling out words letter-by-letter. she was saying that what we consider sign language is just people spelling out full English words, and she said "it's amazing because it's the only universally-understood language." cue silence from the table.

she fully believed that deaf people in China were spelling out English words letter by letter in ASL to communicate, and that distinct words did not exist. we kept trying to correct her. she replied that it's one of her special interests and she's done extensive research on the subject.

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When I was a kid, my dad hated when I hung up anything on my walls. My art, band posters, movie posters, anything. Not with taxks, not with tape (it “ripped the paint off”) not with anything. At one point in 5th or 6th grade he came in my room and found me hanging up a Diary of a Wimpy Kid poster with tacos and he was like “EVERY HOLE YOU PUT IN THE WALL TAKES $10 OFF THE VALUE OF THE HOUSE.” so when I was mad at him, I’d insert tacks into the wall in places he couldn’t easily see just out of spite. Whoever owns the house now is probably wondering about it.

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Urgent Call: Support for My Family in Gaza

In the heart of Gaza, where conflict continues and humanitarian conditions deteriorate painfully, I work as a doctor in a hospital. Despite all my efforts to save lives, my greatest concern remains the suffering of my family.

Unfortunately, the situation for my family has become even more dire. Their home has been completely destroyed due to the bombings, leaving them homeless. Tragically, my grandfather was killed while going to check on our house. Additionally, they are struggling to secure basic necessities because I have not received a monthly salary recently, which exacerbates their suffering.

My family is now in urgent need of help. Your financial contributions will assist in providing food, medicine, and other essential needs they desperately require, and will help them rebuild their lives and face this crisis with dignity🥹🇵🇸💔.

You can contribute by visiting the donation link provided on my page: GoFundMe Link. Every donation, no matter how small, will make a significant difference in my family's life and provide them with comfort and hope during these challenging times.

Thank you for your support and generosity; every bit of help means a lot during these sorrowful moments.،

.

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Hey, can y’all rb this if it’s okay to send you messages asking about your ocs, cause on god I wanna interact with y’all but I am terrified of being annoying lol

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I firmly believe that some stories can never be translated into a different medium and that's okay

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Out of Touch