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homies being dudes

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Hélène Cixous, “Olivier De Serres- A Single Passion Two Witnesses,” Love Itself: In the Letter Box (Polity Press, 2008) // Not Me, episode 5 // Natalie Wee, “Least of All,” Our Bodies & Other Fine Machines // Not Me, episode 8 // Natalie Diaz, "The Hand Has Twenty-Seven Bones", These Hands If Not Gods // Not Me, episode 8 // Yehuda Amichai, “Threading,” The Selected Poetry Of Yehuda Amichai // Not Me, episode 2 // Carolyn Forché, The Country Between Us // Not Me, episode 8 // Louise Gluck, Epithalamium Poem

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revelations have been made

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Well, they have me hoping again…

There is one more panel on my patreon ;)

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🌈🌈🌈 sending hug 🌈🌈🌈

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“I never knew how much value that important person had I never knew how much a beautiful day was worth I never knew how great the time we had together was I never knew how torturous missing someone was Never ever ever We’ll miss someone important when we leave them We’ll miss the beautiful days when that time passes by I’ll miss the time we had together when you have to go And right now, do you know just how much I miss you? I’ll never ever forget you” — Never by 25 Hours

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i cant believe patpran turned a gay man homophobic

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I just find the similarities and differences between how Pat and Pran attempt to provoke each other so interesting. They both continuously invite the other to care for them and offer care in return. The nature of that care varies, however.

Pran seems to offer more nurturing gestures to lure Pat into making a confession. Early in the episode, we see Pran express his desire to cook a meal for his lover and we see him act on this twice throughout the episode. Pat is obviously ELATED by this display despite initially holding himself back for the sake of the bet. We later see Pat encouraging this nurturing behavior when he pretends to be sick in the hopes that Pran will comfort and care for him which Pran willingly does despite clearly knowing that Pat is full of shit. Notice how when attempting to make Pat jealous, the action that really got to Pat was when Pran reached over to wipe Wai’s mouth clean? Such an intimate gesture. This nurturing and soft affection is both something that Pat wants and actively seeks from Pran and something that Pran is willing (& perhaps has been brimming with the desire) to give.

In contrast, we see Pat offer and Pran intentionally elicit more practical displays of affection from Pat. This includes Pran inviting Pat over to change the printhead, and Pran provoking Pat’s jealousy by asking Wai to open his water bottle. Pran has Pat pegged and knows that his love language is all wrapped up in acts of service. It’s something that Pat has been offering to Pran since day 1 by helping with the bus stop, by looking for Pran’s headphones, by applying medicine after he was hurt while playing rugby. We have consistently seen Pran insisting that he can handle something himself and Pat responding with "I know you can but I want to help". Pat thinks “What’s wrong and how can I help fix it?”. Not because Pran is incapable, but because that's just how Pat shows his affection. All of this is so in character for Pat who once said:

Most notably, we see Pat put aside the bet in order to assist Pran with the play. Such a grand display of support is clearly the tipping point for Pran who seems reassured that Pat is someone he can rely on when he’s in a difficult position. Sure, Pran sees a shirtless Pat and flushes but what really steals is heart is this knight in shining armor who will do whatever it takes to help Pran, even if it means losing.

All of this isn’t to pigeonhole Pat and Pran into singular roles but rather to compare their different love languages. While they’re both clearly capable of expressing their affection in various ways, I found this consistent trend throughout the episode to be too interesting not to comment on.

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i just wanted to point out how

utterly

happy

pran

was

throughout

this

bet

+ BONUS: realising the bet is over + utter bliss as boyfriends

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PLEASE SEND HELP

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From the official trailer:

From the preview of episode 6:

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"I'm in love with this boy and I'm only realising it now that I've been in love with him for years and it's killing me."

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Whatever you do, don’t think about the rooftop scene. Don’t think about the fact they both step forward at the same time. Don’t think about the fact that as they do Pran’s gaze drops down to Pat’s lips. Absolutely Don’t think about the fact that in doing that Pran is laying all his cards out on the table. Certainly don’t think about the fact the Pat has to be the one to initiate the first kiss because of that, because Pran HAS to know if Pat is being serious about this or not. You ABSOLUTELY SHOULD’NT think about the fact that after their first kiss Pran gives into his feelings and initiates another because he knows he’s allowed to now. Just don’t think about it.

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i’m sure this is open for interpretation but when i first watched the confrontation between pat and wai (and pran) i noticed how pat’s first words were come here

pat’s eyes were on pran the entire time, he had realized his feelings, he was angry and hurt and jealous and i think, at that point, he wanted to tell pran, he wanted to tell the world. he was drunk, but more than drunk, i think this is just part of pat’s personality.

he is impulsive and loud and straight-forward. as an engineer he is very problem-solving oriented, practical, i am in love so i will tell him. consequences? i will deal with that later.

during this scene, he doesn’t care about wai, his eyes are only on pran. he isn’t angry at pran’s words, this is just how their relationship goes: insults are just another way of flirting. pat steps closer, he is going to tell him, he might even kiss him and he only turns really angry when pran stops him, when pran reminds him of the reality 

when pran “chooses” wai

i love this scene just as much as the rooftop scene because we see the differences in their personalities, how pat thinks with his heart and pran tries to ignore his because he is genuinely scared of being sent away from his house, his friends and pat. again.

but you know what broke me even more than noticing how ready pat was to just shout his feelings to the world? it is that .5 second where after pat says come here, pran, though visibly torn, actually moved towards him

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“my child is fine” your child won’t stop replaying [Eng Sub] แค่เพื่อนครับเพื่อน BAD BUDDY SERIES | EP.5 [4/4]

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the realization.