phantomoftherepo

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Man WHAT THE FUCK LMAOOOOOOO

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im so done with seeing articles about kids and screen time that doesnt mention parent behaviors even once. “kids are always on their phones” so are the parents! which the kids look to for how they should behave! ipad babies didn’t chose to only play on their ipads, thats what their parents gave them!

an anecdotal example: when i was a kid, all my parents would do in their minimal free time was watch tv and then they would be surprised when in my sister and i’s minimal free time we would also only watch tv/play video games. they scolded us for not reading books, but they never read books. they scolded us for not going outside but they never went outside.

“kids are always on their damn phones” my mom is in her 60s and opens up candy crush anytime she’s sitting — it isnt just the kids

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I saw a bumper sticker and thought “is that seductive Daffy Duck” and then when I looked closer I realized it was actually a fishing bumper sticker but also. also it is still very much seductive Daffy Duck???? somehow????????

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JRR Tolkien, writing The Hobbit: The passages there were crossed and tangled in all directions, but the goblins knew their way, as well as you do to the nearest post-office…

Me, a child, reading it: Oh dear. I’m not sure I do know the way to the nearest post-office. It sounds as if that’s absolutely something I’m supposed to know. I can’t know less than a goblin. The book will be disappointed in me.

Me, a little while later, figuring out the location of a nearby post-office: oh thank goodness

Me for the rest of my life: feeling vaguely comforted and affirmed by knowing the location of the nearest post-office, a facility I almost never use, because I am at least the navigational equal of a goblin

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I'm looking forward to the absolute insane levels of meta that will come with the Barbie movie merchandise. Because you know there's gonna be merchandise. It's Mattel and fucking Barbie.

There's gonna be a Barbie Movie™ Barbie. And a Barbie Movie™ Ken. Multiples of both of those, in fact!

And god, I hope we get those roller skates.

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I'm the bravest boy in the world for using this doodle for an in-class project

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thank you greta gerwig, margot robbie, barbie, and god for putting bright colors back into movies circa 2023

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I want Barbie to find out that everything’s fake and to be having a mental breakdown and then Ken comes out of nowhere and starts doing rollerblade tricks to cheer her up

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All of the annoying people saying Ryan Gosling is too old to play Ken clearly haven’t seen his work. This man is absolutely perfect for the role. He possesses a level of satirical humor that can really only be explained by watching the Nice Guys and an interview compilation of his dry ass sense of humor. You guys need to trust Greta..

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literally all of these r me. im wikipedia bf

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one fun thing about being a teacher in march 2023 is that chess is a literal epidemic among teens. we are starting to have meetings about how we can STOP teenagers from playing too much chess which is like if we were trying to figure out how to stop them from reading for fun. When i was in high school five years ago chess was nerd shit only but now it is transcending every social and language barrier and is absolutely rampant. kids aren’t on their phone texting in class anymore it’s ONLY chess.com. kids are playing chess on their phones while playing chess in real life. this is still better than tiktok because at least the kids are developing an attention span from this

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i was in the grocery store and saw an onion on the ground and picked it up, absently saying “poor little guy.” behind me a teenage girl started laughing and then stopped and went “aww. i’m sorry for laughing. that’s nice actually.” and the cycle of cruelty is broken for another generation as a young person realizes that it is not embarrassing to have empathy for another thing that was once living, because certainly to be a lone white onion rolling on the ground in a supermarket would be terrifying to anyone

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the thing I love about the barbie movie hype is that it’s revealing how people played with barbies when they were a kid. I only had Barbies so typically I chose the lesbian affairs and murder plotting route, but if I was at a friend’s house and they had a Ken, I’d often go bisexual marital troubles. hey sound off how you played with your barbies I’m curious now

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